Abiding Marriage Podcast

As a couple, we wholeheartedly believe that prayer between you and your spouse is VITAL to growing your spiritual connection as a couple. And we want to challenge every husband and wife listening to intentionally work on your consistency in this area.  But we also want to acknowledge, as many of you listening could attest, that praying together as husband and wife is harder to consistently practice than you think. So we also want to offer up some ideas to help you grow in your time together in prayer! Please take some time to listen to today’s episode so you can develop this VITAL connection as husband and wife. And as always, thanks for joining us on this journey of marriage!

SPECIAL BONUS FOR YOU: Thanks for taking the time to read our Show Notes. We are offering you a “BONUS” for doing that for this episode!  If you are a married couple and really want to get started, or restarted, on praying together as husband and wife, we would love to send you one of our Growing Your Spiritual Connection books for FREE. And we will do that for the first 10 couples that email us at [email protected]. No strings attached! We look forward to hearing from you and seeing you and your spouse connect spiritually by praying together!!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:Paid Resources You Can Purchase to Help:

Two Hearts Praying as One - Dennis and Barbara Rainey - LINK ON AMAZON: https://a.co/d/da6hHZs

The Power of Praying Together by Stormie Omartian and Jack Hayford - LINK ON AMAZON: https://a.co/d/1UTkGmm

Growing Your Spiritual Connection: LINK ON AMAZON: https://a.co/d/3teBVjU

Online Posts to Help You Pray as Husband and Wife:
Doug Britton: https://www.dougbrittonbooks.com/onlinebiblestudies-marriageinformationandadvice/marriedcouplesprayers-praywithyourspouseeveryday/

Focus on the Family: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/how-do-we-pray-together/

FamilyLife: https://www.familylife.com/articles/topics/marriage/staying-married/growing-spiritually/what-happens-when-couples-pray/

Desiring God Post from John Piper: https://www.desiringgod.org/interviews/should-my-husband-pray-with-me-more

YouVersion Bible App - Plans mentioned in the Podcast:
5 Ways to Pray as a Couple - from FamilyLife -- LINK: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/34843-5-ways-to-pray-as-a-couple

10 Day Prayer Challenge for Couples - from Focus on the Family -- LINK: https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/34082-the-10-day-prayer-challenge-for-couples

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As much as any of us would hate to admit it, every married couple experiences tough days that sometimes turn into tough seasons. The question is, as Christ-followers, “What Do I Do When Things Get Hard in My Marriage?” And while we cannot answer that question for your specific situation, we want to spend some time on today’s episode in providing help for you and your spouse in this tough season. So take a few minutes to listen in. And as always, thanks for joining us on this journey of marriage!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:Online Posts to Help:
Institute for Family Studies: https://ifstudies.org/blog/six-lessons-on-staying-married-from-couples-whove-struggled-and-made-it

Build Your Marriage: https://buildyourmarriage.org/how-to-stay-strong-in-a-hard-marriage/

Symbis: https://www.symbis.com/blog/better-worse-dealing-tough-times-marriage/

Focus on the Family: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/holding-tight-in-the-hard-times/

Abiding Marriage: https://www.abidingmarriage.org/post/where-do-i-turn

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Many of us who have been around church or the Christian faith have heard about the need to "love God and love others", based on Jesus' words in Matthew 22. Today we want to talk about what we call “The Overflow Effect", that is related to Jesus' words in Matthew 22. This "Overflow Effect" is VITAL for your marriage. So take a few minutes to listen in. And as always, thanks for joining us on this journey of marriage!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Three online posts to help: 

Online Post - Vertical to Horizontal Relationships: https://shortdailydevotions.com/philippians-37-8-vertical-to-horizontal-relationships/

Steve Thomason Post: https://www.stevethomason.net/spiritual-formation/the-overflow-principle/

Shawn E Thomas Post: https://shawnethomas.com/2017/12/05/christianity-vertical-horizontal/

Questions to Marinate On Related to the Overflow Effect:

1) What would my life look like if I focused on my vertical relationship first, and then learned to bend that vertical unconditional love and grace to all of my horizontal relationships, especially my marriage?

2) What if following God’s path for my marriage leads me to greater suffering and sacrifice than I anticipated. Will I stay the course, knowing He is with me and He has given me power to grow with Him and with my spouse through the suffering?

3) As I grow in giving God both TIME and PRIORITY in my life, am I trying to “pray God into my agenda and my plans” OR am I faithfully and obediently responding to who He is and how He is revealing Himself and His truth to me?

4) Is the life I’m living, the spouse I’m married to, the family we are raising together - all really about Jesus? In other words,  “Is everything in my horizontal life the OVERFLOW of a vibrant vertical love relationship with Jesus”?

Deeper Dive: Additional Online Helps into this Topic:

Desiring God Online Post: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/if-we-love-god-most-we-will-love-others-best

Navigators Online Post:

https://www.navigators.org/blog/the-kingdom-of-god-is-about-bearing-fruit/

Crosswalk Online Post: https://www.crosswalk.com/family/marriage/when-your-spouse-is-your-closest-neighbor.html

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Marriage is a place where you and your spouse can experience great joy and fulfillment! But the other side of marriage is the painful truth that we hurt one another, even though we love each other deeply. And because of these hurts, one or both spouses sometimes feel guilt and shame around the ways that they have hurt their spouse. Guilt and shame can hinder a couple’s marriage relationship, if it is not dealt with correctly and biblically. So on today's episode, we want to talk about how to deal with the hurts…. so that guilt and shame do not get in the way of your marriage relationship being everything God designed it to be! Thanks for joining us today on this journey of marriage!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Online Post:

Desiring God Post on Shame: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/breaking-the-power-of-shame

Two Resources on the Unbiblical Idea of Self-Forgiveness:

Google Drive Link to Brief Article by The Gospel Coalition: https://drive.google.com/file/d/16ZGHD2EF1pT12drB4PpTuWfuukwFe05F/view?usp=share_link

Google Drive Link to JBC Article by Robert Jones: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1MLIrmILrbSTlbB6DEEFr8339obhzlaU7/view?usp=share_link

Abiding Marriage Page on the Gospel: https://www.abidingmarriage.org/thegospel

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Trust is something that is essential to marriage. Trust is only earned over time, but it can be lost in a moment. Loss of trust often comes from situations like adultery or the use of pornography, but it can also result from other issues where one spouse feels lied to, betrayed, or deceived by the other spouse.  Things like inappropriate conversations with the opposite gender, hiding activities or purchases, or not being open and honest about your financial situation.  In each of these cases when trust has been lost, it is essential for a husband and wife to walk through a season of rebuilding trust. So we want to share with you today some things to help you on this path of rebuilding trust as a couple. Listen to hear more. And thanks for joining us on this journey of marriage!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Online Posts:

Desiring God Post: Four Steps to Rebuilding Trust: https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/four-steps-to-rebuild-trust

First Things First Post: https://firstthings.org/rebuild-trust-marriage/

Focus on the Family Post: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/family-qa/restoring-trust-in-marriage/

Dr. Carol Article on Trust: https://www.drcarolministries.com/7-ingredients-to-rebuilding-trust-between-you-and-your-spouse/

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All couples experience conflict - that is the reality of marriage and relationships. So the real question for you is not IF you will have conflict but HOW will you work through those disagreements and conflicts. And that is what we want to talk about on today’s episode - learning to work through those situations in both a God-honoring and spouse-honoring way. This is Part 2 of two podcasts we are doing on this vital topic!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Resource for Podcast Listeners: 

How to Win Every Fight with Your Spouse - LINK: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Cj3ukCJUIiC9MHaHP93GXDRUZOpwOJ6Z/view?usp=share_link

Other Resources to Help: 

Link to Cru Resource on the Filling of the Holy Spirit: https://www.cru.org/us/en/train-and-grow/help-others-grow/collaborative-discipleship/lessons/1c-how-to-be-filled-with-the-holy-spirit.html

Link to Abiding Marriage Post - Are You Watching the Wrong Camera: https://www.abidingmarriage.org/post/watching-the-wrong-camera

Focus on the Family: The Doorway to Intimacy: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/marriage/the-doorway-to-intimacy/

Association of Biblical Counselors: The Anatomy of Conflict: https://christiancounseling.com/blog/uncategorized/a-biblical-anatomy-of-conflict/

The Gospel Coalition: Seven Steps to Conflict Resolution: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/7-steps-to-conflict-resolution/

Matthew 18: Got Questions: How to Handle Disputes among Christians: https://www.gotquestions.org/Christian-disputes.html

Episode Description: All couples experience conflict - that is the reality of marriage and relationships. So the real question for you is not IF you will have conflict but HOW will you work through those disagreements and conflicts. And that is what we want to talk about on today’s episode - learning to work through those situations in both a God-honoring and spouse-honoring way. This is Part 1 of two podcasts we are doing on this vital topic!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Resource for Podcast Listeners:

Inviting God into the Conflict - Google Drive link: ⁠https://drive.google.com/file/d/10atBKfWv2PBjPtw0Pg-2PQ-f2CKiHW7j/view?usp=share_link

Episode Description: On today’s episode, we share Godly wisdom on what to do in the event you find out that your spouse is having an adulterous relationship, or you are involved in one yourself. In our years of talking to couples, we have talked to multitudes of couples who have walked this path. Many of them made unwise choices in how they handled this, and we don’t want you or someone you know to make those same unwise choices. So we will share Godly wisdom on next steps to take in the tragic event that your marriage covenant is broken.

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Resource for Podcast Listeners:  

Extent vs. Details Document - Strong Recommendations for Confession of Sexual Sin: Link: https://drive.google.com/file/d/1dUqux2blTNcMW8eakfWenKIoyRLP06Tq/view?usp=share_link

5 Critical Steps:

Step One: As the injured spouse, commit to not making any quick decisions related to ending your marriage

Step Two: Seek Godly Counsel: You need to decide together “Who’s in the Circle?”

Step Three: The Adulterous Relationship must be completely severed

Step Four: You must both navigate wisely around what we call “Full Disclosure” of the adulterous relationship.

Step Five: Medical Testing Strongly Advised

Three Online Posts to Help:

1) Focus on the Family - Four Hurdles You Will Face in recovering from Adultery. LINK: https://www.focusonthefamily.com/get-help/restoration-four-hurdles-you-must-face/

2) Biblical Counseling Coalition: Post-Adultery Reconciliation in Marriage. LINK: https://www.biblicalcounselingcoalition.org/2015/09/23/post-adultery-reconciliation-in-marriage/

3) Jill Savage Post on Today’s Christian Woman. LINK: http://www.todayschristianwoman.com/articles/2015/april-15/rebuilding-trust-after-affair.html

Podcast to Hear Our Story of Recovery from Adultery

Abiding Marriage Podcast #5: Our Story and the Why Behind the Podcast - find us on:  Apple  Spotify  Stitcher

Paid Resource to Consider: Link to Scott Gembola’s devotion for couples recovering from adultery

LINK: https://www.wtsbooks.com/products/after-affair-michael-scott-gembola-9781629953908?variant=9750128132143

On today’s episode, we share two questions, drawn straight from two bible passages, that help a husband or wife honestly evaluate the words they are using with their spouse. So be sure to listen in, so you can learn these questions and begin to use them to help grow the communication in your marriage!

Feedback/Contact Us: If you would like to share feedback on our podcast or suggestions for future episodes, please send us an email at [email protected] Thanks in advance for doing that for us!!

Episode/Show Notes:

Abiding Marriage Post - Two Simple Questions: 

https://www.abidingmarriage.org/post/two-simple-questions

First things First Online Post -- Dr Chapman Five Steps Shared:  https://firstthings.org/art-of-communication/

Three Questions to Help Evaluate Your Words Toward Your Spouse:

Two Additional  Online Posts to Help You as a Couple - Questions to GROW communication

Marriage Revolution Post: 25 Questions to Spark Authentic Comm: https://marriagerevolution.org/25-questions-to-spark-authentic-communication/

FirstThings Post - Questions for Couples to Improve Communcation: https://firstthings.org/questions-for-couples-to-improve-communication

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