Stephanie:

“The Obama scandal isn’t working this time to protect Trump.”

Felix:

“Tell Melania the next time you see her at pole dancing class to just scream ‘BENGHAZI!’ It’s like the Republicans’ nuclear option.”

Stephanie:

“If they reach for Hillary’s emails again, they’ve officially jumped the shark.”

Felix:

“I would’ve told her myself, but I didn’t want to interrupt the class. She’s teaching it now.”

Stephanie:

“Honestly? I’m not mad. She’s giving me a career option for when this country fully collapses.

Nancy Reagan gave us ‘Just Say No.’ Barbara Bush gave us literacy.

Melania’s out here giving us free pole dancing certification with a focus on upper-body strength and regime change.

That’s the First Lady glow-up we didn’t know we needed.”

🎙️ Script-Coms™: Love, I’m Fabulous
A Found Family Day Movie

Meet Felix—raised in a Catholic orphanage with glitter in his veins and wisdom well beyond his years. Guided by a soft-spoken Southern priest and an impossibly glamorous woman named Alta, Felix navigates faith, fashion, and the fierce art of being yourself in a world that often wants you to shrink.

From runway communion processions to divine fashion interventions, Love, I’m Fabulous is a story of identity, resilience, and sequined rebellion. It's laugh-out-loud funny, quietly sacred, and emotionally rich—where the sign of the cross becomes a promise: Head. Toe. Wallet. Watch.

✨For anyone who’s ever felt “too much” in a world that asks for less—you belong here.

🎙️ Script-coms™ Presents
Accidentally Sideways™
Ep. 1: “Smile, You’re a Dirtbag.”

Political satire with a Queer Dyslexic Lens.
Think SNL on PBS—with no budget and Trump listening in.

🌆 Manhattan sidewalks.
🥵 Heat, weed, and unresolved political trauma.
🎯 The challenge? Guess someone’s party… just by their smile.
The prize? Sushi. The punishment? Fashion Crocs. The vibe? Unhinged.

Featuring Felix, Stephanie, and David at their sharpest—and pettiest.

“Obama is dead.”
“What the hell—why is that your smile test?”
“It works.”
And it does.

If your face twitches when someone says tote bag, this one’s for you.

👇 Support queer political satire below
https://buymeacoffee.com/bitchimfabulous

🎧 Spotify Description (Server Overload)

Felix’s inbox has 1,924 unread messages—and every one is a slap request.

From petty crimes to painful self-doubt, Server Overload is a riotous look at queer confessions, karmic justice, and the viral power of fabulous accountability.

💥 Featuring:
– A lunch thief, a Nordstrom Rack sinner, and a retail outlaw
– A Great Clips meltdown caught on video
– Stephanie vs. Elon (spoiler: she wins)
– A MAGA wife’s secret hat-toss rebellion
– And one stylist who inspired it all

You asked for a slap. Here it is—with love, glitter, and emotional precision.

🎧 Slap Heard ’Round the Right
A slap, a headline, and a media meltdown. When Felix Fontaine defends a trans teen with a flawless backhand, Fox News spins it into queer terrorism. But behind the viral clip lies a deeper story—one of resistance, satire, and unexpected solidarity.

Tune in for fake pundits, real radio callers, and a post-credit scene that'll change how you see rebellion (and red hats) forever.

💥 Satirical. Queer. Unignorable.
💌 Listener emails now flooding [email protected]
🏳️‍⚧️ Featuring: spoken-word warriors, wheelchair activists, and quiet women screaming through MAGA merchandise.

At a sun-bleached New York diner, Felix sips something pink, Stephanie threatens to spike David’s coffee with rat poison, and a trans girl at the next table wins everyone's heart mid-obituary battle. David reverse-engineers gentrification through the classifieds, while Stephanie’s ready to slap democracy if they’re out of naan again. Together they form a brunch cult: “We are the stained, the spared, and the machine-wash cold!”

Stories that live off the page and rent free in your mind.

Bitch, I’m Fabulous

I’m overjoyed to announce that someone has stepped up to support my work.

To keep his name private, I call him Max. Max reached out and said he believes in my Accidentally Sideways™ voice—and as long as I keep telling stories, he’s offered to cover the cost of Microsoft Word for me. It’s just under $7 a month, but for me, it changed everything.

If you want to be a superhero like Max, you can scan the QR code or use the link below.

When I got my first donation, I Joy Shouted in a Woodman’s grocery store: “Tammy Wynette!”
I scared a woman so badly, she pulled her child closer to her.

I write because I’m dyslexic, gay, and was always told:

“You can’t say that.”
“Use your inside voice.”
“Don’t be so loud.”
“You’re not smart enough.”

I chose off-brand food just to have money to write.
I called every friend I knew asking if they had an old laptop collecting dust.
That’s what I write these stories on.

So if you can—and only if you want to—please consider supporting my work:
https://buymeacoffee.com/bitchimfabulous

Thank you.
And if you hear someone shouting “Tanya Tucker!” in the frozen foods aisle… it might be me again.

No donation needed—just leave a Joy Shout if my voice hit home. Yell anything—‘Tom Brokaw,’ ‘frozen grapes,’ whatever makes your inner weirdo smile. But shout Trump? Baby, this isn’t that. Dismissed—politely, fabulously, and forever.

SCAN ME to Joy Shout

IFelixYou…

https://www.bitchimfabulous.com  

A Script-Coms™ Original
A Felix Fontaine Story

In this emotionally grounded narrative, The Campground Shower Violation examines the role of imagination in friendship, and how personal identity can be challenged by even the most offhanded jokes.

When Felix's friend casually imagines him in a campground shower, what unfolds is a journey of humor, boundary-setting, and reimagined self-respect—with a clipboard-wielding ally named Stephanie always ready to step in.

An exploration of queer friendship, triggered memories, and personal space—all sparked by a spider that didn't believe in respecting tile lines.

Themes: Boundary violations (of the mental and mildew kind), queer identity, chosen family justice, and emotionally processed beverages.

Story Type: Skip A Meal™ – Stories you sit with. Not for digestion. For clarity.

From the world of Bitch, I’m Fabulous™ — where showers aren’t safe, spiders get screen time, and friends who imagine you dirty better come with lavender oil.

https://linktr.ee/IFelixYou

#BitchImFabulous

#ScriptComs

#SkipAMeal

#QueerFriendship

#BoundaryViolations

#FelixFontaine

#ShowerScene

#PodcastHumor

#StephanieSaves

#LGBTQVoices

#CampgroundCrisis

#MildlyMoistButMakeItArt

#SpiderTriggered

#LavenderLatteEnergy

#DyslexiaStrong

✨ Bitch, I’m Fabulous – Episode: The Slap Revolution

Meet Felix Fontaine: fashion-forward, morally feral, and spiritually gifted with a slap that can reset your credit score, realign your worldview, and exfoliate your soul.

In this episode, Felix goes on a slapping spree through New York—from oat milk Karens to subway trolls to a Fox News meltdown that gets spiritually rebooted in real time.

Every slap rewires reality. Every wrist flick is a sermon.
This is satire dressed in sequins.
This is comedy with a conscience.
This is your new religion—and it starts with three words:

Bitch. I’m. Fabulous.

💥 Funny. Queer. Necessary.
💫 One slap at a time.

https://linktr.ee/IFelixYou

It started with a photoshoot. It ended with a slap that powered a village in Indonesia.Felix Fontaine just discovered his power—and it comes with attitude, migraines, and possibly divine consequences.In this episode, witness the transformation of a model, a friendship, and maybe even a mother’s love. Because sometimes, the loudest healing comes with a little fabulous violence and a whole lot of heart.

💫 Featuring:– The Tic Tac Scent of Death– Stephanie’s Sustainable Judgment Glares™– Tyra’s Rebirth via Sass– Alta’s Sacred Gay Hotline– And one slap to end them all

Funny. Fierce. And healing in the queerest way possible.

#BitchImFabulous #QueerStorytelling #LGBTComedy #FashionFiction #PodcastWithPunch #SlapPower #PrideStories

🎧 https://linktr.ee/IFelixYou

Episode: Stephanie’s DetainmentWhat if you got kidnapped—but it wasn’t done well?

Stephanie calls Felix from the trunk of a moving car to discuss sushi logistics, corporate sabotage, and the structural failures of mid-price sedans. What unfolds is equal parts thriller, satire, and friendship goals.

🎙️ An absurd, sharply dressed takedown of the word “detained,” told through wit, war paint, and one hell of a trunk escape.

💎 Based on real chaos. Enhanced with just enough drama to be fabulous.

🎧 https://linktr.ee/IFelixYou