ADHDifference

ADHD brains are brilliant at generating ideas — fast, creative, and often all at once. But when one idea leads to another, and another, it can quickly become overwhelming. Too many possibilities… and no clear direction.

In this ADHDifference Strategies episode, Julie Legg introduces the concept of “Forrest Gumping” — a simple mindset shift inspired by a conversation with Douglas Katz. Rather than forcing ideas into action or shutting them down completely, this approach invites you to let ideas move naturally — like the feather in Forrest Gump — until something gains momentum.

Backed by research on the incubation effect, this strategy highlights how stepping back and allowing space can actually improve clarity, creativity, and decision-making. Instead of chasing everything (or nothing), you begin to notice which ideas return, which ones evolve, and which ones quietly fall away.

Key Points from the Episode: 

•  Why ADHD brains generate constant, non-linear ideas
•  The overwhelm of too many possibilities and no direction 
•  The instinct to either act on everything or shut it all down
•  Introducing “Forrest Gumping” as a third option 
•  Letting ideas move without forcing immediate action 
•  The incubation effect and why stepping back creates clarity 
•  How important ideas tend to resurface over time
•  Recognising momentum instead of forcing decisions 
•  Separating curiosity ideas from commitment ideas
•  Why not every idea needs to become something 
•  Letting go of ideas without attaching failure or meaning 
•  Trusting your brain’s natural filtering process

Links:

DOUGLAS KATZ S2E43: https://adhdifference.nz/s2e43-adhd-adaptive-innovation-guest-douglas-katz/

ADHDIFFERENCE: https://adhdifference.nz/forrest-gumping/

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
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 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg explores The Drama Triangle — a powerful framework that helps make sense of our reactions in emotionally charged moments. Originally developed by Stephen Karpman and brought into the ADHD conversation by Bex O’Malley, this tool highlights three common roles we can fall into: Victim, Rescuer, and Persecutor.

With ADHD, where emotional responses can feel fast, intense, and hard to shift, these roles can show up quickly and even change mid-conversation. But with awareness comes choice. This episode introduces a simple yet powerful way to step back, identify your role, and gently shift into more supportive, regulated responses.

A practical, compassionate reminder that it’s not about getting it perfect — it’s about noticing the pattern and giving yourself another option.

Key Points from the Episode:

•  The link between emotional dysregulation and overthinking
•  Understanding the three roles of the Drama Triangle 
•  Why awareness is the first step to emotional regulation 
•  The power of asking: “What role am I in right now?”
•  How self-distancing can reduce emotional intensity 
•  Shifting from:  Victim → Self-Advocate, Rescuer → Supportive Ally. Persecutor → Clear Communicator
•  Recognising that these roles come from protection, not failure

Links

BEX O'MALLEY S2E19: https://adhdifference.nz/s2e19-adhd-burnout-thriving-in-corporate-guest-bex-omalley/

ADHDIFFERENCE: https://adhdifference.nz/drama-triangle/

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
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🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg explores how many of our emotional reactions (especially anxiety and hesitation) are not about the present moment at all, but are driven by old predictions the brain learned in the past.

Drawing on insights from Brian DesRoches, the episode introduces the concept of memory reconsolidation, the brain’s ability to update outdated emotional patterns when it experiences something different from what it expects.

Rather than trying to force change through willpower or positive thinking, this approach invites curiosity. By noticing when the brain is predicting a negative outcome and gently creating new, contradictory experiences, we can begin to rewrite those internal patterns.

It’s a simple but profound shift: you are not your reactions — you are witnessing your brain’s predictions. And those predictions can change.

 Key Points from the Episode

•  Anxiety is often based on past predictions, not present reality
•  The brain is constantly scanning and predicting outcomes 
•  Many predictions are formed in childhood or repeated experiences
•  These predictions show up as feelings, not just thoughts
•  The “foot on the gas, foot on the brake” feeling is a prediction conflict 
•  Change happens through memory reconsolidation (updating emotional learning) 
•  A mismatch between expectation and reality is what rewires the brain 
•  You don’t need willpower — you need new experiences
•  Small, safe contradictions to predictions are enough to create change 
•  Repetition strengthens new neural pathways 
•  ADHDers often carry predictions like “I’m too much” or “I’m not enough” 
•  These patterns are learned and therefore can be overridden with updated data

Links

BRIAN DESROCHES S2E47: https://adhdifference.nz/s2e47-the-hidden-neuroscience-behind-self-sabotage-guest-brian-desroches/

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with psychotherapist Dr. Katie Brzozowski about the inner critic, where it comes from, why it can feel so loud for ADHDers, and how it shapes the way we see ourselves.

Katie explains how a lifetime of correction, criticism, and misunderstanding can become internalised, turning into the harsh self-talk many ADHDers carry into adulthood. These “tapes” often resurface during moments of stress, grief, burnout, or life transitions — amplifying self-doubt and making it harder to move forward.

Rather than trying to silence the inner critic completely, Katie introduces a more compassionate and practical approach: learning to separate from those thoughts, reduce their power, and stop letting them dictate behaviour. From ACT-based tools to visual techniques and gentle reframing, this conversation offers a grounded, realistic pathway toward self-compassion and emotional resilience.

Key Points from the Episode:

•  How ADHDers internalise years of correction and criticism 
•  The inner critic as learned “tapes” from earlier life experiences 
•  Why the inner critic gets louder during stress, grief, and transition 
•  The difference between “I am” vs “I’m having the thought that I am”
•  Why ignoring negative thoughts doesn’t work 
•  Using ACT (Acceptance & Commitment Therapy) to create distance from thoughts 
•  Techniques to stop getting “hooked” by the inner critic 
•  The impact of comparison and unrealistic life expectations 
•  ADHD, non-linear life paths, and redefining success 
•  Why self-compassion is essential for growth and change

Links: 

• WEBSITE: https://speakeasytoday.com/
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/speakeasypsychotherapy/
•  LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drkathrynbrzozowski/

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with therapist Jennifer Noll Sparks, creator of the Create the Win System — a practical, science-informed approach designed to help people move through overwhelm and take meaningful action, even on the hardest days.

Drawing from both her professional background and lived experience, Jennifer unpacks why so many ADHDers feel stuck... not from laziness, but from nervous system dysregulation. She introduces the concept of the window of tolerance, explaining how overwhelm can show up as either high activation (anxiety, urgency) or shutdown (paralysis, procrastination).

Through simple, playful tools like gamification, “widening the win,” and micro-movements, Jennifer offers an alternative to willpower-based productivity. 

Key Points from the Episode:

•  Overwhelm as a universal (non-clinical) human experience 
•  ADHD, focus struggles, and early school challenges 
•  Why willpower-based advice often fails 
•  The window of tolerance and nervous system states 
•  Activated overwhelm vs shutdown (freeze) 
•  Why procrastination is often nervous system paralysis 
•  Gamification as a dopamine-based motivation tool 
•  “Widening the win” to reduce pressure and build momentum 
•  Micro-actions to break inertia (even moving a limb) 
•  Creating momentum through small, achievable wins 
•  Moving from autopilot to intentional living 
•  Rebuilding agency and self-trust through action

Links:

• WEBSITE: https://www.createthewin.com/
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/createthewinco/
• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-noll-sparks-lcsw-88563885/ 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg is joined by Kamy Moussavi, former engineer and founder of Step Together, who brings a powerful and personal perspective to the conversation around ADHD, emotional eating, and the brain’s relationship with food. Kamy shares his own childhood experience with obesity, restrictive dieting, and undiagnosed ADHD, revealing how traditional approaches like calorie counting failed to address the real drivers behind his behaviour. 

Together, they unpack the critical link between dopamine, emotional regulation, and eating habits, particularly in ADHD brains. This conversation shifts the narrative away from willpower and discipline, and toward curiosity, compassion, and understanding the root causes behind behaviour. It’s an eye-opening episode for parents navigating food struggles with their children and for anyone who has ever felt stuck in cycles of guilt, shame, or emotional eating.

Key Points from the Episode:

• Emotional eating as a dopamine-driven behaviour in ADHD
• Why calorie counting and restriction often fail long-term
• The connection between ADHD, dopamine deficiency, and food
• Bulimia, binge eating, sneaky eating, and shame cycles
• Why weight is a symptom, not the root problem
• The role of anxiety, loneliness, and boredom in eating habits
• How shame drives secrecy and worsens behaviours
• The impact of environment vs relying on willpower
• Dopamine regulation and over-stimulation from food and technology
• Why removing food too quickly can backfire
• Family dynamics and parental influence on eating behaviours
• Redefining “healthy” beyond diet culture

Links:

• WEBSITE: https://www.steptogether.us/
• FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61568953434947
• YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@steptogether-child-weightloss
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/steptogether_us/
• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kamymoussavi/

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Thanks for listening. 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with Tiara Brumberg, certified ADHD coach, entrepreneur, and founder of The Middle Coaching. Tiara lives and breathes the realities of ADHD both professionally and personally — as a mum to three children with ADHD, a partner to a husband with ADHD, and an ADHDer herself.

Together, they explore what Tiara calls the “messy middle” — the real-life space where executive functioning challenges, emotional dysregulation, parenting pressures, and everyday family chaos collide.

Tiara shares honest insights about raising neurodivergent kids without losing yourself in the process, why curiosity is more powerful than criticism in ADHD households, and how simple tools like whiteboards, visual systems, and self-compassion can transform family dynamics.

Key Points from the Episode:

• Parenting in a household where everyone has ADHD
• Late ADHD diagnosis in high-performing women
• Curiosity vs criticism when kids struggle with behaviour
• The “messy middle” of family life with ADHD
• Why ADHD mums often lose themselves in caregiving
• Self-compassion in the middle of overwhelm
• Visual tools and whiteboards to reduce mental load
• Moving from nagging to collaboration with kids
• Teaching independence without shame or power struggles
• The importance of internal vs external locus of control
• Why parents must “put their oxygen mask on first”
• Redefining success in ADHD families

Links:

• FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/tiara.brumberg/
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/tebrumberg/
• WEBSITE: https://www.themiddlecoaching.net/
• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/themiddlecoaching/

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Thanks for listening. 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with Dominic Carubba, a former U.S. Army officer, sales leader, and ADHD coach who was diagnosed later in life after decades of high performance that masked a quiet erosion of self-trust. Dominic shares how ADHD can drive overcomplication, overthinking, and constant attempts to compensate for perceived shortcomings. Even when life looks successful from the outside, internally many ADHDers feel like they are always catching up, always trying to prove themselves. 

The conversation explores how cycles of abandoned projects, unfinished ideas, and chronic urgency can slowly chip away at confidence. Dominic explains why simplifying systems, building visible wins, and learning to forgive yourself are key to rebuilding self-trust. This episode is a reminder that ADHD isn’t about being broken. Often it’s about learning to design systems that work with your brain rather than constantly trying to fix it. 

Key Points from the Episode: 

• Late ADHD diagnosis after decades of high performance 
• The hidden cost of overcomplication 
• How unfinished projects erode self-trust Imposter syndrome in capable ADHD adults 
• Why ADHDers often add more systems instead of simplifying 
• Visible wins as a way to rebuild confidence 
• The importance of learning to say no Lowering the bar to rebuild momentum 
• Designing systems that work with ADHD brains 
• Persistence vs consistency 
• Self-forgiveness as part of growth 
• Why ADHD isn’t something to eliminate, but learn to work with 

Links:

• WEBSITE: https://momentum.theadhdleader.com/
• YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/salesandtechnologyconsultants
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/the_dominicx
• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dominiccarubba/

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Thanks for listening. 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with psychotherapist and author Brian DesRoches (Living a Trigger-Free Life), whose work focuses on the neuroscience of emotional learning and a process called memory reconsolidation. Brian explains why so many people struggle with recurring triggers, self-sabotage, and emotional patterns even after years of insight or therapy.

Rather than simply managing reactions or trying to “think positive,” Brian describes how the brain actually stores emotional learning and how those memories can be updated and rewired through a process that allows the brain to recognise when past threats are no longer true.

The conversation explores internal conflict, self-criticism, and the protective mechanisms behind behaviours many ADHDers experience and offers a hopeful perspective: that lasting emotional change isn’t about trying harder, it’s about helping the brain learn something new.

Key Points from the Episode:

• Emotional memories vs explicit memories
• What memory reconsolidation actually means
• Why insight alone rarely changes behaviour
• The brain’s constant threat prediction system
• Internal conflict: one foot on the gas, one on the brake
• Why willpower and discipline often fail
• Self-sabotage as a protective mechanism
• Updating emotional memories through new experiences
• Reframing ADHD self-criticism and identity
• Why emotional learning may represent an evolutionary shift

Links:

• WEBSITE: https://www.briandesroches.com/
• LIVING A TRIGGER-FREE LIFE: https://a.co/d/bDgsLtC
• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/in/brian-desroches-12313731a/ 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
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▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More

Julie Legg speaks with Ryan Turner — motocross rider, recruiter, content creator, and founder of Dopamine Hunters. After receiving his ADHD diagnosis in adulthood, Ryan began reflecting on a lifetime of intensity, stimulation-seeking, and relentless energy that had previously felt chaotic and misunderstood.

Through motocross and other high-adrenaline pursuits, Ryan discovered that the environments many people see as risky or extreme can actually bring calm, focus, and clarity to ADHD minds. That insight inspired Dopamine Hunters, a growing community, podcast, and documentary exploring how dopamine drives passion, performance, and purpose.

Ryan shares candidly about late diagnosis, substance use, self-medication, education systems that miss neurodivergent children, and why interest-based learning is often the key to unlocking potential. This episode is an honest and energetic conversation about finding healthy outlets for ADHD intensity and creating spaces where neurodivergent people can thrive.

Key Points from the Episode:

• Ryan’s late ADHD diagnosis and emotional aftermath
• Growing up masking ADHD while siblings received support
• The connection between ADHD and substance self-medication
• Why adrenaline environments can calm ADHD brains
• Motocross as regulation, focus, and community
• The idea behind Dopamine Hunters and how it started
• Interest-based learning and why traditional classrooms fail many ADHDers
• The “hidden 20%” of students with internalised neurodivergency
• Burnout vs healthy stimulation for ADHD minds
• Reframing hobbies as exploration rather than “quitting”
• The link between ADHD, dopamine, and purpose
• Ryan’s mission to create a platform for neurodivergent stories

Links:

• LINKEDIN: https://www.linkedin.com/company/dopamine-hunters/
• WEBSITE: https://www.dopamine-hunters.com/
• YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@DopamineHuntersRyanTurner-h8z
• INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/ryanturner751/

Send us Fan Mail

Thanks for listening. 

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🌐 WEBSITE: ADHDifference.nz  
📷 INSTAGRAM: ADHDifference_podcast
▶️ YOUTUBE: @adhdifference
🎙️ YOUR HOST: JulieLegg.nz

 ℹ️ DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational purposes only. The views expressed are those of the guests and do not necessarily reflect those of the host or ADHDifference. Read More