Adventurous Polyamory

Send us Fan Mail

Who’s in charge of what? And why is it pissing me off so much?

Read my noble words:

https://wordpress.com/home/unlimitedheartcoaching.com

Get in touch:

[email protected]

IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Fancy Jargon:

Primary bedroom: we used to call this the master bedroom. But then we realized that the idea of masters is highly problematic. And that historically, the bedroom of the master often was the site of horrible abuse of enslaved people or other people who had their choices stripped from them. So we are dispensing with that terminology because we don’t want to act that way or think that way. Actually, come to think of it, using the term “master bedroom” actually plays very heavily into sovereignty conflict in the home, doesn't it? “I use the master bedroom and so I must be the master, right?” Subconscious toxic ideas will really come back and bite you in the ass. Or as Socrates remarked, “the unexamined life is not worth living.”

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Dead-naming! Divine wrath! A bit of casual blasphemy! John and I talked so much on this topic and of course there was about 45 minutes of stuff I couldn’t even use because I suck at technology. This episode is not specifically about only polyamory; I think it’s time to normalize all of us having access to our own faiths and not tolerate anyone pushing us out of something that truly belongs to us. 

Texts we looked at:

New Testament, Acts 9: 1-22

Background Characters:

Rabban Gamliel The Younger: Saul studied under this great rabbi prior to his change in faith. For a deep dive on this guy, check out https://www.jewishencyclopedia.com/articles/6495-gamaliel-ii

Also you will be able to see there the intense love among Jewish people for footnotes and references in general. 

Pastor Joel Osteen: 

https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2017/aug/30/houston-megachurch-shut-out-flood-victims-twitter-storm

https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/is-osteens-megachurch-affected/

St. James: OG Patriarch of the Church back in the day, and brother of Jesus. I like to think he would have cordially despised a fair number of today’s preachers and pastors. Here’s some nice quotes from him:

https://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Epistle_of_James

Read my noble words:

https://wordpress.com/home/unlimitedheartcoaching.com

Get in touch:

[email protected]

IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

I don't play games. OR DO I?

Link to  The Yoopers' Second Week of Deer Camp: https://youtu.be/3Q57eWfaZmM

Read my noble words:

https://wordpress.com/home/unlimitedheartcoaching.com

Get in touch:

[email protected]

IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

You can take the girl out of the ivory tower, but you can’t take the ivory tower out of the girl, as it turns out. In this episode I veer into radical territory. Shout out to my autocorrect which actually knew how to spell "bourgeoisie"

If you want to hear a more nuanced discussion about cleaning your sweetie’s place, the Benjamin Franklin effect, and all that sort of thing, go back and listen to Episode 9.

Read my noble words:

https://wordpress.com/home/unlimitedheartcoaching.com

Get in touch:

[email protected]

IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Fancy Jargon:

Metamour: the person who is dating someone that I'm also dating. My metamour – or my meta – and I share a partner, who can be referred to as a hinge partner. 

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

You can't be in polyamory long before you start hearing about the veto. Let's take a closer look at this contentious tactic.


References:

Here’s Jocko Willink giving an epically manly TED Talk: https://youtu.be/ljqra3BcqWM

*I am a giant fan of Jocko. However, sadly, embracing his doctrine of taking full responsibility still did not save my marriage. Perhaps I’d have been a bit more successful in that department if I were married to Jocko. Also I really want to watch a TV show which is just RuPaul and Jocko going on dates.

Credit for the use of the term "tyrannical" will forever go to Tom C. Thank you!

Terminology:

NRE: new relationship energy, AKA the pink fluffy stupids. The early stages of dating wherein our protagonists become so lost in each other that they lose track of everything else, including common sense and good manners on occasion.

Relationship capital: this refers to the theory that we build up points in our relationships via good and loving behavior, like money in a bank account. During bad times, we might spend the relationship capital in the account. So for instance, I will accrue relationship capital when I care for a sick partner; later, I’ll spend that capital when I become sick myself and need to be cared for. Built-up relationship capital can get partners through huge problems, but after that, the account will need to be refilled painstakingly.

Get in Touch:
[email protected]
IG: @unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Honestly it's possible this episode was just an excuse for me to say "butts" a lot.

Books:

Folks, This Ain’t Normal, by Joel Salatin. He’s written a bunch but this is the one I read and it ranges over a very broad swath of subjects. 

The Art of War, by Sun Tzu. I bet we’ll be revisiting this bad boy soon.

And for the young at heart, I recommend Maurice Sendak's book, "Chicken Soup With Rice."

Fancy Jargon:

Polycule: a group, family, or tribe of polyamorous people, which may take any configuration such as a V (a hinge partner who has two partners which are not romantically involved with each other), a triad, quad, etc.

Contact me:
[email protected]
IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Can we call modern polyamory a matriarchal system? Who's really "ruling" the pride anyway?

Contact me:
[email protected]
IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Books referenced in this episode:

Sex At Dawn, by Cacilda Jetha and Cristopher Ryan. I admit with shame that I do not know how to pronounce the first author's name and so I chose not to mangle it out loud in this episode.

Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity is Wrong and How the Truth Can Set Us Free, by Wednesday Martin

Fancy jargon:
polycule: a group, family, or tribe of polyamorous people, which may take any configuration such as a V (a hinge partner who has two partners which are not romantically involved with each other), a triad, quad, etc.

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

Because you should be like NASA, and only get busy with people who are as smart as physicists and as sexy as astronauts.


Get in touch:
Email: [email protected]
IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

A pithy rundown of some polyamory dynamics to avoid.

CW: emotional abuse


Get in touch with me:

[email protected]

IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Support the show

Send us Fan Mail

This week I'm here to give you the dope about the BIG D. It's been a while coming y'all.


Contact me:
[email protected]
IG: unlimitedheartfreedom

Contact Mike Sinay the Awesome Divorce Lawyer (MD Local peeps only)
[email protected]
Tell him I sent ya!

Support the show