After Hours with Jimmy Thistle

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Episode 72 | Jessica White — Sexier Sober: The San Diego Coach Who Quit Without Trying & Never Looked Back

In this bright, sharp and genuinely thought-provoking episode, Jimmy sits down with Jessica White — sober coach, host of the Sexier Sober podcast, and professional organiser based in Carlsbad, California — whose story of growing up in a high-functioning drinking household, nine years of blackout drinking, and a moment of quiet moral clarity that ended it all without drama or rehab is one of the most distinctive the podcast has featured.

Jess grew up in San Diego in a well-meaning, loving family where both parents had substance issues — managed, high-functioning, never chaotic — but emotionally distant. She absorbed drinking as the normal currency of connection: football parties, family gatherings, the way adults loosened up and let go. A sensitive, neurodivergent kid who felt something was always slightly wrong with her, she couldn’t wait to find what would finally make her feel okay. At 14, she found it — blacked out the first time, threw up, and couldn’t wait for the next one.

For nine years, Jess drank hard and largely had fun — social, energetic, the life of every party. She chose UC San Diego deliberately, a school full of serious students, because some part of her knew she needed that counterweight. She graduated with good grades. But outside the library, Thursday through Sunday, she was blacking out consistently, waking up with no memory of whole nights, doing things she’d never do sober, saying things she’d never say, sleeping with people she’d never have chosen — and rationalising every single time that next time she’d moderate.

The moment that broke it wasn’t dramatic. It was a Tuesday night, Taco Tuesday, with a younger colleague who looked up to her as a role model. Jess had two or three drinks, remembered nothing, lost her phone, was driven home drunk by the person who called her a mentor. The shame wasn’t about the hangover. It was about the profound split between who she was performing herself to be and who she was actually showing up as. Out of alignment. Out of integrity. Done.

That was July 8th 2020 — two weeks before Jimmy’s own sober date. She never craved it again.

What makes Jess’s story distinctive is the path she took before that date. Three years of internal work — meditation, journaling, visualisation, studying how she worked. Six months of treatment at Rogers Behavioral Health for depression and anxiety — not for alcohol. A growing circle of people who were living differently and reflecting back to her what was possible. By the time she put down the drink, the work was already done. The alcohol just stopped fitting the life she was building.

Now nearly five years sober, Jess runs Sexier Sober — one-to-one coaching, a podcast, and a community membership — built around the radical idea that sobriety isn’t the goal. The goal is becoming so clear on who you are and who you want to be that alcohol simply stops making sense. Effortless sobriety, she calls it. Not easy. Just inevitable.

You can find Jess on Instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/jessmariewhite?igsh=MTdhMnJpeTE2cWdmbA==

And her Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/jess

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

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Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

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Donate:

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Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

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Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

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Episode 71 - Simon

In this episode, Jimmy sits down with Simon, a 36-year-old Glaswegian stonemason and business owner who grew up in the drinking culture of the West of Scotland. Simon shares his honest journey from teenage blackouts and festival benders, to using alcohol as a stress coping mechanism when launching his own business — and how his wife Katie’s gentle nudge finally pushed him toward lasting sobriety. Now 10 months in and doing the inner work through therapy, Simon’s story is a powerful reminder that sobriety isn’t about white-knuckling it — it’s about understanding yourself.

Simon is a stonemason living in Glasgow.

For most of his adult life, he found himself drifting into moments where he’d imagine a sober life. He always wanted to get there, but never quite knew how. How would he fit in? How would he function without a drink?

In 2020, he started his own business. That became the final straw that broke the camel’s back. His drinking had been creeping up for years, and things were starting to unravel. Work, relationships, life, all of it felt heavier.

In July 2023, at the end of a music festival, he told his wife he’d had enough.

Since then, he’s had periods of sobriety, some longer than others. But now, 8 months in, something feels different. Alongside therapy and a deeper understanding of himself, this time feels real.

You can find Simon on Instrgram at:

https://www.instagram.com/simon.is.sober?igsh=MThzNml6NjJ3N3Judw==

Simon’s Just Giving Page:

https://www.justgiving.com/page/katie-simon-arran?utm_medium=FR&utm_source=WA&fbclid=PAVERFWARixVhleHRuA2FlbQIxMABzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA8xMjQwMjQ1NzQyODc0MTQAAaceN9IlkXqO6zmeAbDJlraesiRvBGZeXdBDA45sp5-SC65n0lD-tw2x2aHh3Q_aem_zA-QpmtZqZzd2eVvYm5G8A

Andrew Huberman - Podcast Episode

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/huberman-lab/id1545953110?i=1000744781362

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 70 - Abi King

In this powerful episode of After Hours Guys, Jimmy sits down with Abi King, a sober coach and host of the Sober Connection Podcast, now based in New Zealand. Abi opens up about her journey from teenage binge drinking in 1990s England to four years of hard-won sobriety — and everything in between.

Abi is originally from the UK, but now lives in New Zealand. Mum to 3 teenage girls, she spent most of their childhood buying into the 'mummy wine' culture, rushing bedtime so she could get to the couch and her bottle of wine (or 2). After one of her daughters told her they didn't like the sound of her voice when she was drinking, Abi decided to quit, thinking it would be easy. It took 4 years of constant stop-starting but she got there in the end. Now over 4 years sober, she's finally become the mum she always knew she should be. She now educates people on alcohol-related issues through her 1:1 coaching and her own podcast, The Sober Connection. 

You can find Abi on instagram:

https://www.instagram.com/levelup.withabi?igsh=MTdmbTBlN3k0NzM1bA==

30 Days to Freedom by Abi King

https://subscribepage.io/30-days-to-freedom-reset

The Sober Connection Podcast

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-sober-connection/id1809595582

Mrs D is Going Without - Lotta Dann

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Boing Point 

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The Virtues

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My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 69 - Emma Newman

In this deeply honest episode, Jimmy sits down with Emma Newman, a 10-year sobriety veteran who got sober in 2015 — before sober coaching existed, before quit-lit flooded the shelves, before Instagram accounts made recovery feel possible. Emma’s story is one of the most relatable on the podcast precisely because there was no dramatic rock bottom. No intervention. No ultimatum. Just a quiet, growing certainty that alcohol wasn’t serving her anymore.

Emma quit drinking over ten years ago, long before sobriety became a trend or a wellness choice. Back then, choosing not to drink often raised eyebrows, and the only visible routes were AA or rehab. Emma chose neither, instead carving out her own path—without quit lit, podcasts, or a sober community to lean on.

By day, she’s a mum to two teenagers (and two cats) and works for a disability charity. In her spare time, she’s become a passionate advocate for alcohol-free drinks, supporting the category from its earliest days. Today, Emma is a regular judge of alcohol-free categories and writes about non-alcoholic drinks, bringing both lived experience and a sharp critical palate to a category that’s come a long way since she started.

You can find Emma on instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/emma_sobersonic?igsh=MXVhY2JraXdodWhzbw==

And Emma’s linktree at:

https://linktr.ee/emma_sobersonic

Love Sober Podcast

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/love-sober-podcast/id1379018341

The Outrun - Amy Liptrot

https://amzn.to/4wZI4JB

Wild - Cheryl Strayed

https://amzn.to/3RTyLuy

Dry - Augusten Burroughs

https://amzn.to/3PU8T19

Wintering - Katherine May

https://amzn.to/4wOYPqK

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 68 - Adam Burg

In this compelling episode, Jimmy sits down with Adam Berg, a government affairs lobbyist and mayoral appointee from Denver, Colorado, whose polished professional exterior hid nearly a decade of secret, escalating alcohol abuse. Adam’s story is a masterclass in high-functioning denial — working with US senators, building a career in law and policy, all while hiding bottles in his car, refilling them so nobody would notice, and drinking every single night.

Adam Burg lives in Denver, Colorado, with his wife and their dog, Ruby. 

His sobriety date (May 20, 2022) marks a turning point that came after more than a decade spent cycling through alcoholism, stuck in the all-too-familiar limbo between wanting change and not knowing how to reach it. 

Eventually, something shifted. Adam made the decision to confront his illness head-on. He asked for help, committed to recovery, and began the hard, daily work of rebuilding his life with honesty and intention. 

Today, that same journey has become a source of purpose. What once held him back now fuels his ability to connect with and support others facing similar struggles. His story is one of resilience, accountability, and the belief that change is possible for anyone, one day at a time.

You can find Adam on Instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/sober__traveler?igsh=MW41bjFvczd2cnBlaA==

Unexpected joy of being sober - Catherine Grey

https://amzn.to/4uLnmM0

Recovery Elevator - Podcast

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/recovery-elevator/id971959728

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 67 - Laura McKowen

In this landmark episode, Jimmy sits down with Laura McKowen — bestselling author of We Are the Luckiest and Push Off From Here, co-founder of one of sobriety’s earliest podcasts, and one of the most important voices in the modern recovery movement. With nearly 11 years of sobriety, Laura’s story is equal parts raw, literary, and profoundly hopeful.

Laura is the author of the bestselling memoir We Are The Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life and Push Off From Here: Nine Essential Truths to Get You Through Life (and Everything Else).

Her work explores the intersection of addiction, recovery, emotional sobriety, and the complexities of relationships. She has written for The New York Times and has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, The Guardian, The Atlantic, The TODAY Show, and more.

In 2020, she founded The Luckiest Club, a global sobriety support community, and she writes Love Story, a popular Substack newsletter about sobriety, relationships, and writing. She is currently working on her third book.

Laura lives with her daughter on the North Shore of Boston.

You can find Laura on Instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/laura_mckowen?igsh=MjBnbDE5eHExbjY2

And all Laura’s other links on Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/laura_mckowen

We Are The Luckiest - Laura McKowen

https://amzn.to/43CQRDL

Push off From Here - Laura McKowen

https://amzn.to/435OMjt

John O’Donohue - The Inner Landscape of Beauty

https://open.spotify.com/episode/4gzzImBlp1rDvtzMg03g6E?si=MUtEe9SsQA2fGx2J4lDezA

Sentimental Value

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt27714581/?ref_=ext_shr_lnk

Drinking: A Love Story - Caroline Knapp

https://amzn.to/3Puk9kM

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 66 | Nikki Pears — 5 Years Sober, One Drink, and Back to Square One: Why Putting Down the Bottle Is Just the Beginning

In this raw and deeply honest episode, Jimmy sits down with Nikki Pears — South African-born sober coach, nervous system specialist, and founder of Mommy Is Sober — whose journey through addiction, relapse, rehab, and ultimately real recovery is one of the most layered and instructive stories the podcast has ever featured.

Nikki grew up in Johannesburg feeling lost, socially anxious, and like everyone else had been given a manual for life that she never received. Her first drink at 17 — sneaked in the bushes outside an Italian club — felt like the solution she’d been searching for. The anxiety melted away. She became the life of the party. She finally felt like she belonged. That feeling became the compass she chased for the next two decades.

Through veterinary nursing school in South Africa, where she became the first woman accepted into the Vets’ drinking club and students hooked each other up to saline drips to cure hangovers before morning lectures, to falling in love in Mozambique and building a successful scuba diving centre on the beach — Nikki’s life looked extraordinary from the outside. Beautiful home. Thriving business. A loving husband who knew when to stop. Three kids. And inside, a hole in her soul that no amount of alcohol, success, or sunshine could fill.

The drinking got worse. The rules — only wine, only after six, only on Fridays — never lasted. She missed her flight to rehab three times because she needed one last party first. She eventually checked herself in for what she thought would be four weeks. She stayed for six. And it worked — for two years. Then she stopped going to meetings, decided she’d cracked it, and white-knuckled the next three years in a state of furious, emotionally volatile, exhausting dry sobriety — still carrying every unprocessed feeling, just without the numbing agent. After five years, she picked up a drink. Within weeks it was worse than before rehab.

What finally worked — and what makes Nikki’s story genuinely different — was going inward. Nervous system regulation. Learning that she’d spent her entire life in fight-or-flight mode, suppressing every emotion since childhood, and that sobriety without inner healing is just white-knuckling in slow motion. Now four years into what she calls her real recovery, Nikki coaches women online through @mommyissober, helping them regulate their nervous systems so alcohol loses its grip — not through willpower, but through genuine inner peace.

You can find Nikki on instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/mommyissober?igsh=MWh1Zno3ZXUyc2hlOA==

And Nikki's website is here:

https://mommyissober.live/

The Surrender Experiment - Michael A. Singer

https://amzn.to/4dYoZij

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 65 | Ashley Howard — The Secret Drinker Nobody Suspected: A Straight A Student, a Fitness Coach & 3 Years Sober

In this compelling episode, Jimmy sits down with Ashley Howard — certified recovery coach, life coach, and health and fitness entrepreneur from South Carolina — whose story of secret, private drinking behind the perfect public image is one of the most quietly relatable the podcast has ever featured.

Ashley grew up in Pennsylvania as the daughter of a hard-working single mum who was rarely home. A straight A student, a sports star, always ticking the boxes — and from age 14, secretly drinking at parties on weekends, then going home and sliding back into her model student life as if nothing had happened. Nobody suspected a thing. That pattern — performing perfectly in public while crossing lines in private — would define the next two decades.

By 19 she was arrested for underage possession of alcohol. By 21 she had a DUI. Both were brushed under the carpet. She got the job anyway, met her husband on a work trip, built a thriving fitness coaching business, had two children — and quietly, steadily, shifted from social weekend binge drinking to something far more private and deliberate. Her happiest time of day became when her whole family was asleep and she could finally drink the way she actually wanted to drink. Two, three, four drinks every night, alone on the couch, protecting the image of the health and fitness coach who had it all together.

Then in one year, Ashley lost her brother to drug complications and her father to lung cancer from 40 years of smoking. Two deaths from preventable causes. And still she didn’t connect it to her own relationship with alcohol, because she told herself: I don’t do drugs. I don’t smoke. It took nine more years.

The turning point came on a trip to Scotland for a wedding — watching a friend who’d always been a big drinker thriving without alcohol and still being the life of the party. The voice in her head got loud. She came home, got through Christmas with family, and on January 8th 2023, sat down on the couch, turned to her husband, and said the words she’d been terrified to say out loud: I want to be done with alcohol forever. I’d like your help. They cleared the house that night.

She used the 75 Hard fitness challenge as her public cover story while she quietly did the inner work. Six weeks later she posted her story on Instagram. Then a few reels went viral — five million views — and her inbox was flooded with people saying this is my story too. She got certified as a recovery coach, built a free online community, and now helps women who look exactly like she did: healthy, driven, successful on the outside — and secretly dependent on alcohol to get through the night.

You can find Ashley on Instagram at:

https://amzn.eu/d/074zO5jE

And her website at:

https://www.ashleyhowardcoaching.com

Sober Motivation with Brad McLeod

https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/sober-motivation-sharing-sobriety-stories/id1650658049

Annie Grace - This Naked Mind

https://amzn.to/4u1tK0n

Annie Grace - The Alcohol Experiment

https://amzn.to/43zCwrI

Laura McKowen - Push Off from Here

https://amzn.to/4uG2mGB

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 64 | Dawn — Soberfish: The Pioneer Who Changed What Sobriety Looked Like Online

In this warm and wide-ranging episode, Jimmy sits down with Dawn, the woman behind Soberfish — one of the earliest and most influential sobriety communities on the internet. Now approaching a decade sober and working remotely from a beach in Thailand, Dawn’s story is a masterclass in what happens when you finally put down the bottle and let your real life begin.

Dawn grew up in North London before her family relocated to Poole, Dorset when she was 16 — uprooting her from everything she knew at exactly the wrong age. That need to fit in, to be accepted, to belong, became the engine that drove her drinking from her teens through her 20s and 30s. She was always the one who got the sickest, always the last one standing, always the one with no off switch — drinking a bottle of wine a night from her early 20s, celebrating weight loss with a Chinese takeaway and more wine, and letting generous friends with deeper pockets fund nights that went far longer than they should have.

What made Dawn’s story different from many was the absence of the traditional rock bottom. She never got married, never had kids — and while her friends naturally slowed down when life took over, Dawn had nothing to pull her back. She drank through her 30s feeling like a failure for not meeting someone, not realising that the drinking itself was why people kept drifting away. By her early 40s she was overweight, a heavy smoker, and exhausted.

Then in summer 2016 a before-and-after photo of people who’d quit drinking appeared in her Facebook feed. She hadn’t searched for it. She just saw it, looked in the mirror, and decided to give herself a year off — mainly to lose weight and quit smoking, fully intending to drink again. She got ill in November, accidentally got a head start on sobriety, and by six months in, knew she was never going back.

With almost no sober content online at the time — just a handful of Facebook groups and Becks Blue — Dawn started sharing her story publicly to lighten the load of her “boring” new life. What she got back changed everything: thousands of messages from people saying I’m just like you — people who didn’t identify as alcoholics, who’d never googled sobriety, but who saw themselves completely in her words. Gray area drinking before anyone called it that.

Now nearly 10 years sober, six stone lighter, non-smoking, running a membership community and coaching practice, and living her dream of working from the sunshine, Dawn is living proof that sobriety isn’t the grey, boring compromise society told us it was. It’s everything else.

Catch Dawn on Instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/soberfishie?igsh=ZjVwbjJqaDJmczR3

or on Facebook at:

https://www.facebook.com/share/18vvijBris/?mibextid=wwXIfr

Dawn's Linktree:

https://linktr.ee/Soberfish?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleAQqhjhleHRuA2FlbQIxMQBzcnRjBmFwcF9pZA8xMjQwMjQ1NzQyODc0MTQAAadjo2U7bFrRAONzzbycrGG000G7TntaAHX6KJAa7Y141EdsrbGnDAFn3jmhLw_aem_NIEBd5DpI53j1Sa6L4HNPQ

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://amzn.to/4dF6xw7

Glorious Rock Bottom - Bryony Gordon

https://amzn.to/4u40nuk

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode 63 | Mikey Banks — From Cocaine Debt, Violence & Planning His Own Death to 4 Years Clean

⚠️ Content warning: This episode contains discussion of addiction, violence, debt and suicide.

In this searingly honest and deeply moving episode, Jimmy sits down with Mikey Banks — Aberdeen joiner turned recovery advocate and founder of the Better Together Ball — whose story goes further into the darkness than almost any guest the podcast has featured.

Mikey grew up on a council estate in Aberdeen, loved and cared for by his parents, causing mischief, playing out late, and finding alcohol at 12 or 13 — not because he loved it at first, but because he needed to belong. By the time he started his joinery apprenticeship at 16 he was drinking with men twice his age. Then cocaine arrived, and everything changed. Unlike alcohol, the first line of coke told him: this is it.

Through his early 20s, Mikey held it together. Working, paying bills, holidays, cars — the facade of a functioning life. But the cocaine use grew, the money ran out, and his bright idea to start dealing to fund his habit quickly spiralled into thousands of pounds of debt to dangerous people. By 26 the wheels had come off completely. He was using several grams a day, stealing from everyone he loved including his father’s treasured £9,000 watch which he sold for £400, manipulating his parents, lying to his wife, and driving to his dealer’s house before work each morning just to be able to function.

The violence came next. Drug dealers gave him a choice: take a beating or watch them do his house. He took the beating. Four men stamped on his head, kicked out five of his teeth, spat on him and laughed. His first thought when it was over? I need to get drugs. He walked to a shop, cleaned his face, and went to score.

By March 2022, aged 32, Mikey had had enough. He wrote individual letters to his wife, his children, and his parents, left them neatly on the bedside table, left his phone behind, and walked out with a pocket full of drugs and a pocket full of drink — heading for a bridge over the River Don. Nineteen hours later, five minutes from the bridge, police found him. A female officer put her arms around him and said thank God we found you. It was the first act of pure kindness he’d felt in years. That moment cracked something open.

Recovery wasn’t linear. Relapses at 11 days, then 54 days. But on 15 June 2022, he used for the last time. Nearly four years later, Mikey is clean, sober, rebuilding his marriage, present for his three children — and carrying the ashes of his best friend Blaine, who died by suicide 54 days into his own recovery, around his neck as a daily reminder of why he does what he does.

Now building the I Am Movement and organising the Better Together Ball charity event for suicide prevention, Mikey is one of the most powerful voices in the recovery community — not because he has a certificate, but because he’s lived every word of it.

Find Mikey on Instagram at:

https://www.instagram.com/mikeybanksrr?igsh=cjdqbGVwcTY1YW0x

Mikey’s I AM movement:

https://ko-fi.com/s/08ce0f2ede?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAVERFWAQfukxleHRuA2

My Instagram is:

https://www.instagram.com/recovery_jimmy

And you can find all my other links at:

https://linktr.ee/jimmythistle

Buy me a coffee…

https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Alcohol Explained - William Porter

https://a.co/d/0854fIb6

This Naked Mind - Annie Grace

https://a.co/d/0gy6mT9Z

A Million Little Pieces - James Frey

https://a.co/d/0jdcIjGb

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Enjoyed After Hours? Follow, review and share the podcast!

Instagram: @thesoberthistle

Coaching: https://thistlefreedomcoaching.com

Support: https://buymeacoffee.com/afterhourswithjimmyt

Books:

Alcohol Explained: https://amzn.to/4uMmkyB

This Naked Mind: https://amzn.to/4eC6L6z

A Million Little Pieces: https://amzn.to/44jOV3i

Donate:

https://motiv8.im/donate/

https://nacoa.org.uk/get-involved/donating/donate/

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.