Aging Angst and Alleluias

Nadine will be long remembered as a faithful volunteer and servant. She was a true friend of Veranda Ministries and a true treasure to everyone who knew her.

The best part of this story is listening to Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly share her bond with Nadine as her advocate, EOLD/Dementia Doula. Relationship-based care was in full operation, and there's no doubt that we all can learn from this example of love.

This episode also includes part one of Randy’s story, a journey no family wants to take. His treatment in an emergency room and the care he received in a specialized unit are ones no family should have to endure. 

Mary Anne's outrage over his care (and lack thereof) is the result of a disheartening and unfortunate commonplace experience of how those living with dementia are treated in some medical facilities and specialized units around the country.  PLWD deserve better care.  

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Research tells us how people think about aging, the elderly, and abuse - finds that people very quickly and unconsciously draw a line between older people and the “rest of us.” This mindset isn’t restricted to how we think about the elderly and the problems it creates; it contributes to a range of social issues, including racial and economic discrimination. But why does it seem more prevalent in this particular aging group we call "seniors", no matter the color of their skin?

Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and producer, Sue Duffield, take the word "advocacy" to heart and to a new level. It's time for non-profits, churches and ministries to seriously examine how they treat, care and recognize the elderly in their organizations. 

Also mentioned on this episode is the new video release from the Veranda Ministries, "Dementia's Hidden Heroes", available on YouTube - https://youtu.be/lemoJAp8Yos?si=oOpwXPpMhb3N7M7h

The amazing story of "The Fifth Sparrow", also mentioned on this episode, is a great reminder of the value each soul has in the kingdom of God, no matter what side of the tracks you're from. Reference made at about the 15 minute mark on this church's YouTube episode: https://www.youtube.com/live/4OYIIkUV-F4?si=X8_zbRHb7ZghqYc9

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The Veranda Ministries truly knows that every caregiver is desperate for any single sign of hope and joy regarding their loved one’s dismal future of a dementia diagnosis. Telling their stories is one way to ensure a message of optimism and encouragement is paramount to everyone. For a loved one whose world is collapsing, this is the best therapy — telling the truth about the disease but loving the individual more, no matter what stage. 

Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and Sue Duffield share personal stories of family along with clients of Veranda Ministries. And while culturally, what isn’t as frequently discussed – if at all – are the bright and deeply emotional experiences of dementia. It’s a challenging disease, often destroying families. Socialization is one, if not THE most important way you can help a loved one. Many family members are fearful and not very comfortable around their family member with dementia, and as a result, tend to stop visits or even abandon them altogether. It’s important to continue finding ways to help them feel loved and socially connected. It doesn’t always have to be all bad. 

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Host Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and producer, Sue Duffield revisit the amazing and healing story of one of Mary Anne's exceptional clients, Martha. It was Martha's dignity that was challenged with incontinence, but to the quick thinking of those around her, she was spared the horror of the embarrassment of losing bodily functions in a public place.

One day you may find that someone you care about — a spouse, parent, relative, or close friend — needs help negotiating the very simple daily tasks of life. Perhaps that day has already come. There is so much to learn here in this episode. Caregivers worldwide deal with this kind of thing every day. But understanding that the loved one with a cognitive disability is always forefront, doing whatever it takes to make them comfortable, even using a brand new coat to cover and protect the new seat in a truck, is quite okay.

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This episode starts out chaotic, fun, frivolous and hilarious - talking carrot cake and nudist camps - all in the same breath! Host Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and producer Sue Duffield, take the rabbit trail down that crazy path of spilled medicine caplets, Mark Lowry's giant custom pill box container, to even talking (as friends do) about the dilemma of knowing whether or not you're taking the right pill at the right time, or if you took it at all, for that matter! 

Also discussed on this episode is Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) that is recently becoming the "go to" therapy in treatment-resistant depression, or those with dementia and compromised brain health. The safety, however, of ECT has been consistently questioned, particularly among elderly patients with cognitive impairment. Mary Anne greatly questions the use of this kind of therapy with dementia patients and has seen personally the "not so good" results.

The Veranda Ministries is a compassionate oasis allowing caregivers to entrust their loved ones with care on a daily basis. And so is the heart of this podcast, to "do the right thing, for the right reason." 

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Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and her sidekick-producer Sue Duffield, take this episode down a memory lane right from the start. The one thing that stands out the most is not only their reminiscent ways reliving the corner drug store experience, but also the difficulty of navigating the larger box store pharmacies, especially for the elderly. 

With an average of 11,000 people turning 65-years-old every single day, understanding and meeting the diversified needs of a new generation of older adults has never been more important, especially with medication and pharmacies. The desire for specialty pharmacies plays a critical role engaging with these older patients, but only if they are able to completely understand this generation’s needs, changing their preconceived notions about aging, and delivering services that are designed to meet them where they are.

Bottom line: We need a community-driven, caring experience for all those in the aging population, especially when it comes to medication. As Mary Anne says, "We're making it too hard to be kind."

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Thursday Night 7pm - July 18th, 2024 Veranda Ministries Benefit with Mark Lowry, Hillcrest Baptist Church,621 Hartsville Pike, Lebanon, TN37087

Episode 56 is a continuation from previous episode 55 (Unmerited Favor: A Daughter's Love Caring for Both Parents with Dementia) with Mary Gail Anderson, an adult child of two parents suffering with dementia and Parkinson's. This is caregiving to the absolute ultimate. Her exact words, when dealing with the medical professionals are, "question everything." Seriously, question everything.

As someone ages with dementia-like diseases and/or Parkinson's, their health appears to deteriorate in a way that can seem slow at first. It's as if they are inching toward a cliff — and when they fall off, they find themselves on another health cliff, and another, and another. With each cliff, it gets more difficult for a family member to catch them. 

Mary Gail's compelling story hopes to encourage all caregivers to constantly do in-depth research when it comes to medical care for their loved ones.

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People with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias are usually cared for by family members or friends. The majority of people with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias receive care in their homes. Each year, more than 16 million Americans provide more than 17 billion hours of unpaid care for family and friends with Alzheimer’s disease and related dementias. 

In 2023, these caregivers provided an estimated 18.5 billion hours of care. Approximately two-thirds of dementia caregivers are women, about one in three caregivers is age 65 or older, and approximately one-quarter of dementia caregivers are the “sandwich generation” caregivers, meaning that they care not only for an aging parent, but also for children under age 18. 

...And then there's Mary Gail. This episode will uncover the enormous level of grace and mercy that Mary Gail gave in caregiving for her parents. You will cry; you will laugh; and mostly, you'll be shocked at how benevolent and merciful this daughter of two parents is, serving and doing what she believed to be "the right thing to do."

This is part one... Part two is coming in the next episode.

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An exceptional and informative episode with guest, Anna Marie Adams (Certified End-of-Life Doula and founder of the International Doula Life Movement) will encourage all caregivers to realize the value of the extensive care a doula can bring to every member of a family. Host Mary Anne Oglesby-Sutherly and Anna understand the impact of helping thousands of families during their most critical times when dementia and death happens with their loved ones.

Questions answered during this episode are: What does it mean to be an End-of-Life doula? What are some of the ways to work through obstacles of helping families and their communities? And what are the top three important characteristics of relationship-based care when it comes to end-of-life?

Anna's goal is to ensure that every person in her care receives the comfort, dignity, and respect they deserve during this most sacred transition called death.

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www.internationaldoulalifemovement.com

Sue Duffield, producer of the Aging Angst and Alleuias Podcast as well as newly appointed board member of the Veranda Ministries, takes her frivolity on-location broadcasting to one of the biggest days on the Veranda Calendar - Derby Day! Imagine staff and volunteers using wheeled walkers with inflated horses' heads attached, racing on the parking lot, creating howling applause and laughter by all attendees, especially those with dementia! This was a day filled with hee-haw-like joy, and this episode just gives a small glimpse into the world of dementia and the desperate need for those with cognitive impairment to have a day to be normal. As Barbara, one of the precious clients of the Veranda, says at the very end, "It's good for my brain. I love coming here."

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