What if the word “stop” is doing more harm than good?
As caregivers, siblings, and parents of neurodivergent and disabled children, we often ask behaviors to stop, not out of frustration or lack of love, but because we want our loved ones to be accepted, included, and safe in the world.
In this video, I talk about two essential steps when responding to behaviors:
Step 1: Choose love and acceptance first Before teaching, before correcting, before explaining... we choose to be okay with the behavior. Not because we want it to stay forever, but because stopping a behavior without understanding the need behind it often creates more distress, not less.
Step 2: Teach to the effect of the behavior, not the behavior itself Instead of saying “stop,” we teach cause and effect, gently, specifically, and in context. We explain how a behavior impacts others, the environment, or the moment, while still respecting the person’s need to regulate.
Behaviors are not random. They are not “bad.” They are signals from a nervous system doing its best to regulate, cope, and survive.
And don’t forget, all brains can grow.
Hi, I’m Louloua, a mom, sister, neurotherapist, author and founder of All Brains Grow. I'm on a mission to empower families raising neurodivergent children by equipping them with the tools, confidence, and clarity they need at home and in real life.
When you’re ready, here’s three ways I can help out 👇️
FREE GUIDE “5 ways to deal with meltdowns without feeling helpless" so you can feel in control when your child is out of control - https://www.allbrainsgrow.com/freebie...MY BOOK "From Client to Clinician: The Transformative Power of Neurofeedback Therapy for Families Living with Autism and Other Special Needs" - https://www.amazon.com/Client-Clinici...LEARN ABOUT BIOPLAY: aka biofeedback through play, our signature behavioral approach that feeds the brain intentionally through feedback, in order to create change physiologically and behaviorally, created by Dr Lynette Louise - https://www.allbrainsgrow.com/services