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My daughter Anna (16f) and I (45f) have very different personalities - I'm an introvert whose idea of a perfect night is curling up with a good book, and she's an extrovert who prefers going out with friends. She's also grown up far more privileged than I was - I grew up in a cramped apartment in a poor immigrant neighborhood, while Anna and her sister (13f) have their own rooms, computers and cell phones. (This seems to be the norm where we live, but it's a big culture shock for me.) Our relationship has always been challenging due to our different personalities and upbringings, but things seem to have gotten much more difficult since Anna became a teenager. We fight a lot, and though I of course love her, I often find her to be very demanding & entitled.

Last year, Anna said that she wanted a big party for her "sweet sixteen." When I asked what she had in mind, she said she wanted something like the parties that her friends had for their bat mitzvahs. Even knowing how extroverted she is, I was STUNNED that Anna would ask for such an extravagant event, which there's no way we could afford - after all, those kinds of parties cost tens of thousands of dollars! Of course, I shut it down immediately. This made her very angry, and we had a huge argument. I just literally could not believe that she would ask for something so frivolous as an expensive party that only lasts a couple hours.

For weeks, Anna kept begging me to have a sweet sixteen, insisting it was important to her to have a big party with all her friends for a "milestone birthday." I got so tired of arguing about it that I finally relented and agreed to it - however, I explained that it was going to be on a budget. She said she understood and agreed.

I was able to find a venue (the local clubhouse), a DJ, and went with Chipotle for catering, all of which she OK'd. (I managed the process so that we would not go over budget.) I was able to put it all together for around $1500.

Well, I guess I should have predicted this, but although Anna agreed that the party would be done on a budget, apparently it wasn't good enough for her. When we entered the venue on the day of her party, it was clear that she was disappointed. The party itself seemed to go fine.

At the end of the night, we drove home in silence, and I could tell she was upset. When we got home, Anna stormed off to her room without even so much as a "thank you."

The next morning, Anna laid into me, saying that her "cheap ass party" left her feeling humiliated in front of all her friends. I reminded her that she agreed to my conditions, and she said she never would have done so if she knew I was going to "cheap out so bad." I told her she should be grateful she even had a sweet sixteen party, something I never would have dreamed to ask my parents for.

It's been a week and Anna has barely spoken to me. I think she's being very entitled and my husband agrees with me, but my other daughter says she understands where Anna is coming from. AITA?

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So here’s the scoop. Me (28M) and my girlfriend (29FM) have been together for a year and half in a serious relationship. She was always saying that she wants for us to get married but I was always postponing it because I wasn’t ready for marriage but perhaps getting engaged. Recently I got an offer for Med School in Ireland out of the blue during Christmas which I accepted without hesitation. I have applied to med school in the past only to get rejected and she was made aware from the beginning that I will be moving abroad for med school. She got mad at me for not consulting her about this huge decision. I only told her after I received an offer and I took it. I didn’t even ask her if she is okay with it but over a span of 3 days she became distant and cold. On NYE she broke up with me on the basis that I am childish, lack communication, and did not take her input into a major life decision.

I could’ve asked her and run this decision by but as soon as I saw the email I took the offer. I should of presented this to her in a way that I ask for her input and took it. I mean I didn't want to break up with her I love her very much. So AITA for taking a once-in-a-lifetime offer without consulting my girlfriend or she is breaking up on NYE. So what do you think I should do now?

EDIT: We did discuss getting engaged in the next year and working towards a marriage in due time. After I told her she said pondered the idea of LDR, but inevitably I dropped the ball on the way I communicated this to her.

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/10ene41/29f_broke_up_with_me_28m_for_not_consulting_her/

 I am a nurse practitioner and I am the primary care provider for a lot of the low risk maternity cases at the practice where I work. I also work hand in hand with the doctors and midwives to create a healthy maternity, birth, and postpartum situation.

My fiancee is completing her residency. We live together and have for a few years now. We aren't in any hurry to get married. We originally had plans to do so a couple of years ago but then we got really busy for two years.

It is driving my very religious parents crazy that their youngest son is living in sin. I don't really care. I'm an adult and I do what I want. We are getting married in June.

So we are visiting my parents for Christmas. The way it came together this year everyone is at my parents house. So that's my folks, my three siblings, myself and fiancee, and seven grandchildren. So seventeen people.

At dinner my mom starts going on about how she is so glad that we are finally getting married and she won't be embarrassed at church any more. And my dad says how proud he is of his three older kids who all either waited to get married before moving in together or got married right away after moving in together. My fiancee was getting embarrassed and I was getting mad over this stupid argument we have had too many times. And a family dinner was the last straw.

I have asked them repeatedly to just accept that they cannot control how I live my life. I refuse to stay with them when I visit even if I come alone. Hotels are just easier.

So I started talking about a premature baby I had been reading about. It was almost three months premature and weighed about 1.6 pounds. It was super strong and healthy for being born so little and the NICU had high hopes for the baby doing well.

My mom and dad both got deer in the headlights looks on their faces. To bad. Should not have fucked around with my fiancee's feelings.

So I asked about my oldest brother. He was born almost four months premature. Is there a chance that we could check out the family album where we keep all the records of family births and stuff.

I already know my brother was over 9 pounds and almost 23" long when he was born. My grandmother told me all about it the first time my parents tried to shame me.

The subject gets changed very fast. After supper my parents told me that I should not try to embarrass them with private things that are not my concern. I told them that if I heard anything about my living arrangements ever again for the rest of my life I would make sure to keep bringing up the FACT that my mom was in her second trimester when they got married.

My parents are mad at me for telling them how to behave in their own home. But my fiancee is happy that they seem to be off the subject for good.

AITA?

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So I'm the owner of a wonderful rescued macaw. She is a wonderful bird but has a lot of issues due to an abusive former home. I've had her for 3 years and since then haven't taken any vacations or trips away as it would be too disruptive for her. She distrusts everyone and is very reliant on her routine. I love her deeply and I'm happy to make sacrifices for her. They are permanent toddlers and very intelligent birds.

I met my husband by the time his kids were older, my stepdaughter was 16 at the time. We married when she moved away for college. Nevertheless I thought we'd managed to have a decent relationship, until now... my stepdaughter is getting married in March, and naturally there's a lot of preparation involved. They're wanting a huge traditional wedding and she is stressed out of her mind. They live out of state, and she invited me recently to come visit her for a week to help make wedding plans and spend time with their 2yo. I declined and she insisted to know why, acting very hurt, and I explained the parrot... Well jt all went downhill from there.

She caused a massive fuss with her dad, saying she never got a mother figure and I never accepted her as my full blood daughter and this is the ultimate snub for a silly animal. That I'm cold and emotionless... I feel really hurt and I can tell he agrees with her even though he's refusing to take sides. But I don't see why I should be expected to take holiday time off work to babysit and "bond" all of a sudden and I don't see how I'm a monster for this... am I the asshole here?

Edit: context of our relationship, we don't usually talk at all and she hasn't visited home in 4 years.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/10dttwx/aita_for_prioritising_my_parrot_over_my/

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 simply can't tell if I'm wrong. I've vented about it to people and it's split 50/50 and I'm losing my freaking head here. I met my fiance 6 years ago and I came in to the relationship with 2 boys. My fiance has no biological children but he's great with my boys. There HAS been discussion of having a baby together in the past but it was something we were always on the fence about because my youngest has some behavioral issues that exhausts us most days. So it was kind of a "no, definitely no more babies" one minute and then "if it happens, it happens" the next minute.

I'm on birth control. Or I was, up until last week when I found out I'm pregnant. I never failed to take it on time. I had an alarm set for every single night at 8pm and took it religiously for the past 4 years! Maybe it was the antibiotics I was on last month BUT I made sure to wait a week after taking the antibiotics to even do.. you know.. so I thought I was safe but regardless, here we are. Completely unexpected.

Well, my fiance is much more calm about this than I am. I'm scared shitless. I mean, I'm happy but terrified and holy hell my emotions have been a rollercoaster ride in itself. I'm very quick to sadden and anger now and I can't even stand myself. So please, tell me if I'm overreacting with this comment.. we were talking about the kids, including new baby, and he just went real quiet for awhile and when he finally spoke again he goes "I'm going to end up treating them different". I asked what he meant and he goes "well I love the boys but like.. they're not mine. It's not going to be the same and I'm going to love my child much more." I immediately got up and left. It was a smack in the face. My boys real father passed before I met my fiance in a horrific accident. My boys call my fiance dad for crying out loud and have since forever (they were only 2 and 1 when he met them). So I left to get space because that comment hurt so much and raised questions because if he starts treating them all different simply because he now has a blood child, I simply can't put my boys through it. He says I'm overreacting. AITA?

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/comments/10dxuto/aita_for_leaving_after_a_comment_that_imo_was/

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My dad passed away 2 weeks ago. Me, my wife 'Candace' and my daughter (16) 'Shiloh' and her stepsisters (19) & (17) flew to my hometown to attend the funeral. After that we got 2 hotel rooms (one for me and Candace, one for the girls).

While I was in the room, I got a call from Shiloh at 11pm crying and sounded like she was arguing with her stepsisters. I asked what the matter was and she told me that her stepsisters insisted that she sleep on the floor (there were one large bed in the room and there was enough space for all 3 girls to sleep on). I asked why and she said she didn't know. I went to see what the issue was and talked with my stepdaughters about it. They kept talking but didn't really explain why they told her to sleep on the floor. They just shrugged and said "It's better this way...we're more comfortable this way..". I told Shiloh to grab her things and when one of my stepdaughters asked where we were going, I told her I was booking her a hotel room. Both looked upset but didn't say anything but they must've called their mom because she was awake when I got back and started arguing with me about giving Shiloh an entire hotel room for herself. I explained why I did it but she said I wasted money and that Shiloh could've sucked it up for one night on the floor. I called her unreasonable for saying this but she told me I showed the girls that I'm "playing favorites" and made my stepdaughters share a room while I gave my daughter and entire room for herself.

We went home and Candace is still bringing it up saying I mishandled this. She even pointed out how my stepdaughters are upset since they're not speaking to me.

ETA It was Candace who got a room for the 3 girls as to not stir any drama and save money. She was in charge of hotel reservation since I was emotionaly distressed.

Also. Candace did NOT expect Shiloh to sleep on the floor. She wanted all 3 girls to share the bed.

ETA#2 For those that are calling me an ah for giving my daughter her name. Her mom did that and she's deceased so please let's not focus on that.

And also, I've known my stepdaughters since they were little. We're pretty much family and Candace is a sahm but I give her full access to my money since this stuff was already discussed before handed. Pretty much everything was.

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