Amateur to Pro

Lately, I’ve been thinking about scarcity and how it shows up in our lives. I was prompted when the host on this podcast asked me why many high-level female leaders are reluctant to help other women rise the corporate ladder. My response was that these leaders have a Scarcity Mindset, which is the belief that success in any arena of life is a zero-sum game.

“If only I had clarity, I know I have what it takes to accomplish any goal!” “If only I had the courage to pursue my dreams… but, alas, I’m just not brave!” “If I just had the confidence to try… write… build… say… (choose your verb), I know I would succeed!” These are words I hear often from my clients, regardless of age or background. They express the universal desire for the three “C’s”—Clarity, Courage, and Confidence—that so many people hope to gain from Professional Coaching.

When someone asks me what I do, I tell them I help people create regret-free lives. This wasn’t the goal I set out with when I started coaching, but over time, I’ve learned that regret is a deep-seated fear for many, particularly those entering the second half of their lives. Forget about all the things we did that turned out to be mistakes. Here, I’m talking about regretting the things we didn’t do. Evidence shows that most people regret what they didn’t do far more than what they did.

People who come to coaching often fall into two categories: Those who don’t know what their next (or first) career move should be and Those with a job and career who want to switch to something else. Coaching the first group involves diving into their core life values, uncovering one or multiple life purposes, and drawing out their courage to take the first small steps towards becoming the “The Man in the Arena” Theodore Roosevelt spoke about in his famous speech at the Sorbonne in 1910.

I know it’s meant as a compliment, but it irks me when someone says, “You’re lucky to have a high pain tolerance.” They usually follow it up with a story about their own natural, even genetic, low pain tolerance. I’ve spent decades learning and practicing to become more tolerant of discomfort and pain. Professionally, it’s what I help my clients do, as well. I’m not any more genetically gifted or divinely ordained than the next person who takes two Advils at the slightest sign of discomfort. But, years ago, I learned a life lesson that changed everything.

An extraordinary Life Coach is probably not smarter, richer or more academically accomplished than her clients. She may not be older, wiser or more worldly than her clients either. But if she’s really good at supporting them to live a more optimal and fulfilling life, it’s a good bet that she has made one transformative shift for sure. She’s turned pro!

One year ago, during this week, still shell-shocked from the events of October 7th, I wrote the following article, Have Freakin’ Conviction! I could have never imagined that over a year later, our brothers, sisters, and children would still be held captive by the most evil and genocidal cult alive today. But I also couldn’t have imagined how much more robust, connected, and powerful the Jewish people would become because of this unspeakable tragedy.

The rising generation, also known as Gen Z, has its work cut out for them! With nearly a decade of experience coaching this generation, I've witnessed their unique traits and behaviors. First, let me tell you what they are not. They are not stupid, uneducated, lazy, irresponsible, and a plethora of other negative attributions they’re generally given by parents, bosses, and those of their cohort who don’t suffer from the particular misunderstanding I’ll speak of here.

At least once a week, I’m approached by someone eager to create a career as a Professional Coach. They often ask for my advice and sometimes the opportunity to work with me to build a thriving Coaching business. I’ve previously written about the qualities that define an extraordinary coach. Today, I want to share eleven non-starters on the path to becoming an impactful and successful professional coach.

I have a bone to pick with the Happiness Crowd! Through the last decade, we’ve been obsessed with exploring, chasing, and finding happiness. Look through any airport bookstore, and you’ll find countless authors promising happiness—only if you follow their specific formula. This is Happiness…The How of Happiness…The Happiness Project…The Happiness Equation…The Meaning of Happiness…and my personal favorite (not really!)...Growing Up With A Bucketful of Happiness!