Ambition Without Compromise by Monique R. Shields

December 04, 2024 48 | Learning How To Choose Instead Of Saying Yes To Everything

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

In a world where success is often defined by external benchmarks and societal expectations, Monique invites us to pause and reflect on the art of intentional living. Tune in as Monique shares her personal framework, "Nature, Nurture, Navigate," guiding us to understand our inherent strengths and make choices that resonate with our true self.

Press play now to learn how aligning your actions with your core values can lead to a more fulfilling and abundant life. This is the first step into a life of intentional living. Listen now!

📝As a special note, Monique announces the opening of her coaching waitlist for February 2025. You can sign up through her website to receive updates and secure a spot for transformative one-on-one coaching.

MENTIONED
Episode 27 | Scaling Your Humanity With Your Wealth

GEMS DROPPED
“Discomfort is necessary for us to grow, but not all discomfort is necessary. And I think that we haven't stopped to consider what necessity means to us. I'm not adding things to my plate for no reason. There has to be a reason. And the reason needs to be specific. It has to feel necessary.”

“You're oftentimes fighting to create more equity in the world. You're pushing so hard and overextending yourself for the people that you are making a way for. Your employees, your team, your mentees, whoever it is that you are trying to blaze the trail for or with. A big part of the mission oftentimes is to create more equity for them, for them to have experiences where there is more given to them than was given to you. Where they get to experience a reciprocal relationship within these crazy systems that they have to operate in and navigate and build, within and yet we won't expect that for ourselves. It's like you're trying to give the thing that you are not willing to give to yourself. And I want you to know that that comes at a cost, not just to you, but for those who are watching. Because you're not setting the example you think that you are. When you are living a life that is feeling lopsided, other folks can see that. We have to give ourselves permission to exist in what it is that we're trying to create for others to not leave ourselves out of our own vision.”

“You need to know what your values are. I think a lot of us have loosely articulated vague values that are really just a set of feelings that we've never actually taken the time to do the work on, to truly be precise about, to be specific about.”

“My values coupled with my mind, body, connection, and my gut feeling help me decide what I choose to say yes to versus what I don't. And we all need these. And I will also say that getting intentional practice around connecting the two, using them in real life situations, it deepens our conviction. It makes it much easier to step into whatever season of life or work that is ahead of us with a lot more confidence and speed, honestly.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

38 min

November 20, 2024 47 | When Ambition Meets Stillness: Finding Strength in Slowing Down

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Are you feeling ungrounded or disconnected from your true self? Our latest episode takes you on a transformative journey of self-discovery through therapy, journaling, and meditation.

Join Monique as she takes us on an unscripted journey, sharing raw and real insights fresh from a therapy session, where the realization dawned that the key to feeling grounded lies in embracing our past and present selves.

Through insightful reflections and a powerful grounding exercise experienced at a recent retreat, Monique challenges the notion of productivity-driven meditation and journaling, advocating instead for a return to the simple, joyful practices of being in nature and embracing the present moment.

This episode is a heartfelt call to action for those feeling detached from their inner selves, offering a fresh perspective on finding balance between our adult responsibilities and the wisdom of our inner child.

Tune in now to explore your own relationship with stillness, play, and the simple pleasures of life.

MENTIONED
Spelman College
Barnes and Noble

GEMS DROPPED
“Sometimes you're in a moment, you're having realizations,in real time, and trying to architect,organize, and package it is just going to kind of ruin it. And it just needs to be raw, it needs to be real.”

“The thing is never the thing y'all. There's something that's running beneath it that is keeping you from doing whatever activity or habit or ritual or behavior it is that you want to exhibit or want to stop exhibiting. It's not about the behavior itself. It is about something else that is running beneath it.”

“I always had my diary. It was a companion and it was a way that, I not only just consolidated my thoughts or processed my emotions, but it was a way that I connected with myself. It was like a part of a relationship that I had with myself. It was a trusted anchor, and an expression of my own rootedness.”

“The aspects of how journaling used to show up for me when I was younger and what was so grounding and beautiful about it was that there was no adult pressure. There was no pressure period on it.”

“For those of you who are craving stillness, who feel like the relationship that you once had with yourself, where there was space for no strings attached, no pressure, no expectations, where you can just be and let your feelings flow. It's like you get to experience the fullness of yourself. To experience that again, make space for this other part of yourself, your inner child.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

36 min

November 06, 2024 46 | Balancing Success and Personal Legacy with Former Blavity.org ED Tamyra Gordon

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Join Monique for an enlightening conversation with Tamyra Gordon as she shares her journey of intentional living, homeschooling and legacy building.

Tamyra, also known as Tammy, is a public historian whose work serves as a powerful reclamation of Black history, identity, and legacy. With over 18 years of experience in education, historic preservation, workforce development, and public programming, she is more than just an executive; she is a steward of ancestral stories.

Tune in as we explore Tamyra's path and learn how she continues to build and nurture her legacy with courage and heart. Her wisdom and experiences offer valuable guidance for anyone looking to live a life of purpose and impact.

MENTIONED
Association of African American Museums

GEMS DROPPED
“There's something really special and important about recognizing that building a relationship with our little selves and our former selves.The different essence is the part that we get to reconnect with,celebrate and honor, but also giving room for the fact that our little nine year old selves will never exist exactly in the same format that she did back then. So even as we reimagine our younger selves now and engage with that essence and energy and help leverage it as best we can that she gets to grow and evolve and morph as we're growing, evolving, and morphing. It's not like this static thing. I think that that's really important because that speaks to the beauty and the messiness of it all.” - Monique R. Shields

“Legacy is less about generational wealth and what's the hand down, and what are the things that we sort of get as part of being tied to someone else's legacy. Really, it's just like, are we leaving this place any better than we found it and can the people who are left to tell our story actually articulate that? Did we live a life that our values, that our beliefs, that our actions are aligned to all those things that we said that we cared about? Did people feel better after being in my presence and being around me than they did not being around? Did I honor people who would otherwise be forgotten and not let to work and other things sort of distract from those moments where you can pull in people into the fabric of how we live today. In my mind, that's the legacy. That's how I'm thinking about it today. I'm also open to the idea of what that looks like continuing to mature and evolve with me and how I sort of see the babies keeping and thinking about legacy, because that will also matter. But for right now, it's keeping things alive that I think matter at the end.” - Tamyra Gordon

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

1 hr 7 min

October 23, 2024 45 | How To Actually Prioritize Rest: What I've Learned To Do

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

This episode is a delightful reflection on Monique's recent family trip to Australia and the valuable lessons she learned about balancing ambition with rest.

Monique takes us through her journey of stepping away from her solopreneur business to embrace a much-needed break, all while maintaining the essence of her work and personal life. She shares insights on how to create space in your life for rest and recovery, even when you're running a business that thrives on personal connections.

Monique also dives into the practices that have enabled her to take extended breaks without compromising her business. She discusses the importance of viewing rest as an asset, studying your own rhythms, setting a vision and plan, and getting the right support. For anyone contemplating a sabbatical, a big trip, or simply more spaciousness in their daily life, this episode is packed with actionable advice and inspiration.

Press play now to discover how to integrate rest into your entrepreneurial journey and emerge with renewed energy and clarity.

MENTIONED
42 | Committing To Success That Heals You With Marla Teyolia

GEMS DROPPED
“You have to decide that rest is an asset and not a liability.”

“We have to acknowledge that something is not congruent and that we actually have to step into a true valuing of rest, of space, not with the deep undercurrent of guilt that comes along with not constantly being productive. We have to see the relationship, like, truly feel the relationship between rest and productivity as one that is harmonious.”

“Conceptually, it's easy to understand that rest is good for you, but my behaviors over time are not necessarily lining up with that understanding. So I want to shift us from understanding to belief.”

“We are wrapped up in so many systems that tell us that if we ever stop moving, that we will be overtaken and destitute and just out of the game, that we will be fighting for our lives to feed ourselves and to be relevant. No matter how much money you have that track can be running in the background still pushing you to do more than what you need to be doing. And so I don't mean to in any way make light of this, but we have to kind of get real with how ridiculous it actually is and that it is not a narrative of our making. It is a narrative driven purely out of capitalism.”

“I'd given myself over to this season of rest, and it gave me the proof after going through that, that abundance can be possible for you when you treat yourself abundantly.When you treat yourself with scarcity, you cannot be surprised when your results are scarce.“

“We cannot always be sowing seeds. Sometimes we need time for the stuff to grow. Sometimes we need time for the stuff to wilt and die so that it has the energy to regrow in a new season. You cannot always be on, you cannot always be doing, you cannot always be giving because you're going to reap really weak crops or it'll be the wrong crop.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

56 min

October 09, 2024 44 | Submitting To Hard Changes In A New Season

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

Are you navigating a season of change? This episode is here to provide inspiration and guidance.

Join in as Monique revisits a transformative period in her life, reflecting on a throwback episode from her earlier audio newsletter series, "Letters from Monique." She shares insights from her journey of allowing herself to be changed, especially during significant life transitions like the birth of her second child and the early seeds of this very podcast. She also emphasizes the importance of allowing oneself to be changed, the power of community, and the necessity of support and presence.

Monique dives deep into the messy and beautiful process of change, offering a raw and honest account of her experiences. Whether you're in a season of transition or just seeking inspiration to embrace change, this episode is dropping gems.

So, grab your tea, journal, and a cozy spot as Monique takes you on a journey through personal evolution, resilience, and the beauty of embracing change. Enjoy, and may this episode meet you exactly where you need to be met.

GEMS DROPPED

“You can't want change without permitting yourself to be changed.”

“Our thoughts are anchored upon the changes that we get to experience externally, but what has to happen internally we undersell, we undershoot, and oftentimes, we don't fully anticipate because it's something that's new. So you're not really able to preemptively anticipate what those internal changers are. So to be changed is something that is easy to struggle with.”

“We want the external product of change, we want the external experiences of change, but it's not all upside to get there. It can't be. There has to be some pain. And I'm not gonna say, full on suffering, necessarily, but pain, loss, absolutely. And this comes with any kind of change.”

“When we ask for change be ready for everything that comes with that, but also recognize the beauty in it.”

“Permitting ourselves to be changed is to permit ourselves to have permission to change, to have permission to create in the midst of change, to have permission to reenvision, to pivot, to shift, to reimagine, to want differently. And it requires support. I think for most of us, particularly so for women, we are so practiced at not permitting ourselves to want, to create,to build freely, unapologetically, and inviting in the support to do that. And not even the support to do that, but also just making sure that we are part of communities where that was heralded and encouraged and modeled. It means everything.”

“It is very easy to scale back on our self investments when we think we can't produce as much, or we think that, like, oh, I'm stepping into a season of less. So then we start giving ourselves less. Girl, you're doing the opposite of what needs to happen. This is a season where we give ourselves more,much, much more.”

“If you want change, you have to permit myself to be changed. So ask yourself, what needs to be true in this next season in order for you to get prepared for that season? There's a new version of you that is waiting.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

52 min

September 25, 2024 43 | Rebooting Social Media Boundaries As A Business Owner: What I Had To Do

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

In this episode, Monique takes us on a journey through her relationship with social media. She dives into an ongoing experiment that is reshaping her life, work, and well-being. Instead of waiting until the end of this process, Monique brings you into the messy middle, sharing her live experiences, feelings, and the steps she’s taking to reclaim her time and attention.

Join Monique as she unpacks the psychological and emotional layers of her social media detox, offering valuable insights that might just inspire you to rethink your own digital habits. Grab your tea, take some notes, and let’s dive in together.

GEMS DROPPED
“I too, grapple with my relationship to technology, specifically that of social media. And I'm in the middle of an experiment that impacts my life, my work, my wellbeing,and my relationships regarding social media.”

“We are going to reclaim our time. We are going to reclaim our attention. That is of high, high value to me, especially in this transitional season where I am really focusing down and redirecting my path with some new intention. And this (social media) cannot be a thing that stands in the way.“

“I was actually really surprised by the release that I felt (with unfollowing every account on IG). It felt like a real releasing, a relinquishing of something… something relieving and easeful.”

“Baby, I got goals and [social media] cannot be a thing that stands in the way. This cannot be a thing that feels like it's clogging up my brain. A top line goal for all of this was to build the belief that I could feel in control of technology that I claim to use for my business and engage in for entertainment and connection. But its primary use is to be a tool to amplify the messaging of my business, to make sure I'm reaching people with my message.“

“Social media can serve as this passive proxy for connection that does not exist and it keeps you in a state of inaction of actually creating the thing you want, which is real connection.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

42 min

September 11, 2024 42 | Committing To Success That Heals You with Transformational Healer & Coach Marla Teyolia

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

Welcome back, good people! This episode is a special treat as we welcome the inspiring Marla Teyolia, a seasoned transformational coach with over two decades of experience. Marla’s expertise lies in executive presence development, enhancing communication skills, career growth, and team expansion, all while preserving core values and personal authenticity. Her holistic approach integrates mindfulness, meditation, and yoga practices, making her coaching a transformative experience.

In this episode, we dive deep into Marla’s journey, from her early work in the field of domestic violence to her current role in empowering leaders. We explore how she balances her deeply spiritual practices with her work in high-powered corporate spaces, and how she navigates the dance between personal freedom and family commitments.

Marla shares profound insights on the importance of reconnecting with our humanity, the power of breathwork, and the necessity of decolonizing our vision of success. This conversation is a powerful reminder that our true power lies within, and that by tending to our spirit, we can navigate any space with grace and strength.

Join us for this enlightening conversation and discover how you can embrace your inner power and live a life aligned with your deepest values.

GEMS DROPPED
“Nothing about the fuckery that I was experiencing shifted, but I had shifted. And that's when I realized, oh, my liberation is an inside job, first and foremost. And then when I feel strong and powerful and I feel free, then I can actually do the work I'm here to do in a way that's fully aligned and isn't coming from a place of lack or trauma, but it's coming from a place of power.” - Marla Teyolia

“We have a western way of thinking where it's like, medicine is an external thing that you take into your body to help you to solve a problem. But your relationship to your inner spiritual awareness and connectedness is at your core and is your medicine. The medicine is inside. Making your medicine your lifeline has to start from there and everything else flows from that.” - Monique R. Shields

“The strength that comes from knowing. First of all, what you value most-family, freedom, etc- there's no perfect static place that you arrive to that just stays that way. There's always this constant dancing trade off. When you think about doing that dance, we will cannibalize the things that matter most. And it's not like your family always gets the best of you or your work always gets, you know, 100% of the time, all the time. But there are other things outside of what matters most. And it's like focus on cannibalizing that.” - Monique R. Shields

GUEST LINKS
Learn more about Marla Teyolia, Exec Coach + Advisor to BIPOC Visionary Leaders | Website | Instagram | LinkedIn | Tik Tok

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

40 min

August 28, 2024 41 | What to Do When Your Vision Is Changing

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

Have you ever found yourself feeling stuck, even though you've accomplished everything you set out to do? Life is full of subtle shifts and changes that can catch us off guard, leaving us feeling lost or in limbo. As high achievers, we can sometimes be so focused on our goals that we miss the subtle shifts happening around us.

In this episode, we’ll explore how to recognize and adapt to these seasonal transitions, ensuring that our dreams expand and contract with grace. Whether you're a CEO, entrepreneur, or someone in the midst of a personal transition, this episode offers valuable guidance to help you align with your next season.

Join in as we explore the importance of acknowledging shifts, seeking trusted perspectives, and giving yourself the grace to grow.

MENTIONED
15 | Learning To Dream First (CEO Series)

GEMS DROPPED
“Dealing with seasonal transition in our life means to have a life that is ever moving, ever changing, and responding to those changes, …getting what we need out of the seasons that we're in, not fighting the seasons that we're in.All of those things are going to come up, but, I think part of where we hit the rough edges is we don't realize that a season has changed until it's too late. “

“It's hard to detect that something is off because the really tricky thing about it is that things aren't actually broken.”

“I don't think we spend enough time talking about what it's like to navigate the murky waters of - not just ‘I set the vision,’ ‘I set the mission,’ ‘I walked the path,’ and ‘I'm accomplishing the things I said I wanted to do’ and now something is wavering, something is shaky.”

“Dreams move. They pivot and change course but our dreams also expand and contract through different seasons. When something contracts, usually everything comes closer together and you become more compact. There's no more or less material there. It's just that we are more focused, and only going to do a certain number of things. And when we have a little more heat–think of that as energy or capacity …then that same dream gets to expand.”

“Sometimes we will wake up in the middle of a season that is basically trying to end. I had to wake up to the fact that my season had shifted. Now I'm in a season where all these doors are open, and I get to choose which door I want to walk through. Initially, the prospect of that felt kind of exciting. But then, immediately, it turned to overwhelm because I had not given myself space to actually unpack the season that I'd come through because I did not realize that that season had come to a close.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

47 min

August 14, 2024 40 | Are You Asking Too Much Of Your Team?

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

One of the most challenging aspects of this journey of entrepreneurship is people management. As entrepreneurs, we often find ourselves grappling with delegation and feedback, two crucial elements that can make or break our team dynamics and overall business success.

In this episode, I’m diving deep into these very topics by exploring the common pitfalls entrepreneurs face when trying to delegate tasks and provide feedback, and offering practical solutions to overcome these challenges. Join me as I share personal experiences and the lessons I've learned from coaching clients through the intricate dance of delegation. From setting clear expectations to creating effective checkpoints, I walk you through my thought process and provide actionable advice to help you delegate tasks more effectively and give constructive feedback.

If you've ever struggled with feeling like your standards are too high or questioned your ability to trust your team, this episode is for you.

MENTIONED
I'm opening three exclusive spots for women CEOs ready to redefine their leadership. If you're at a pivotal moment—launching a new fund, leading a team, or stepping into a new role—and feel the weight of what's next, I’m here to support you. Ready to invest in your growth and tackle challenges head-on? Visit www.moniquershields.com and fill out the simple contact form to get started.

GEMS DROPPED
“When we delegate the first thing we go to is the initial delegation, but I think that we skip a couple of steps when we jump to initial delegation. We bundle together in our mind that expectation setting and delegation are the same thing. Telling someone what you expect them to do in terms of steps that you expect them to take, people that you expect them to speak to, that is not the same thing as expectation setting. Expectation setting really revolves around, have I actually taken the time to define what ownership means?”

“I think the other part of defining ownership, is also explaining the stakes in the context because when we start handing over decision making authority - even if it's very low stakes or small decisions - they still have an impact. We equip our team members with what they need to increase their chances of success when we explain to them the context, that is necessary for the task at hand or for the whatever it is that you're trying to hand over ownership for. This is a key missing piece.”

“Before we set any expectations, we have to recognize how little we actually know about what our expectations are. Especially as women leaders, we know what we want, but we don't know how to express what we want. We're not practiced at it. We're not practiced at both, what it is that we want, and expressing it freely because we are often in spaces where it is not safe to do that. And so, number one … is to drop into and find support for expressing your needs. This flows outside the walls of your business or your organization. This is about how you are also showing up in life, how you relate to what it is that you need… How you express that. Period.“

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

35 min

July 31, 2024 39 | On People Pleasing

⚡️Click Here To Text Monique!

In this live-recorded episode, we explore the pervasive issue of people-pleasing, its roots, impacts, and the paths to overcoming it.

This behavior, often rooted in a desire to be liked and accepted, can have profound impacts on both our personal and professional lives. Join me for personal stories, client experiences, and actionable steps to help you reclaim your voice and set healthier boundaries. Learning to love and accept ourselves, flaws and all, is a vital part of the journey towards breaking free from this behavior.

If you're ready to reclaim your voice, tune in to this enlightening episode. It's time to prioritize your own well-being and create a life that truly reflects who you are.

GEMS DROPPED

“People pleasing is symptomatic of feeling unseen, going for long periods of your life, probably in your youth, probably having to deal with some of our traumas, where we've been unseen. “

“I want to be really clear that people pleasing is not the same thing as being ”weak”, or, not having a perspective or being passive. Some of the most hard hitting, ambitious, aggressive, in all the best ways, women that I know also identify as being people pleasers. Two things can be true at the same time, y'all. People pleasing is not the same thing as playing second fiddle and always taking a backseat.”

“You are in the driver's seat of the choices you make, no matter what choices you make. This podcast, Ambition Without Compromise, is about you designing what ambition looks like. And I think oftentimes when you really think about it, one of the most ambitious things, if I'm honest, that a black woman in this world could do is to decide against all odds that she is prioritizing just her basic well-being over anything else. Over career, over accolades, over anything. And that could look a lot of different ways.”

“Our bodies are our bodies. We are still real flesh and blood human beings. We are not supernatural. We are not meant to take on all the burdens of the world. We have got to stop convincing ourselves that, like, I can hold it. They're not built like me, so I guess I better handle it. Like, at some point, it will catch up with you. 1000% guaranteed and on that day, you won't be able to always just walk it back.”

“I think all of this boils down to a very fundamental need that all of us have as humans, which is unconditional love. It's like the ooey gooey center of it all. I'm talking about leadership. I'm talking about, you know, showing up in spaces and holding things and pleasing folks. And you gotta please your investors, you gotta please your team, you gotta please your clients, you gotta please your parents, you gotta please your extended family, you gotta please your spouse, you gotta please your kids. Right? But when we operate like this, I think a big part of it is that we move into circumstances, in general, in life, where we just don't expect unconditional love. We don't know what that looks like. We have not been taught that and not in a blanketed way. And it's what we crave most, where it's just like, I can be me and I'll still be accepted. I can want what I need too, and still be loved. I’m deserving of it all.”

STAY IN TOUCH
Come and follow me on Instagram @moniquershields and I would love your feedback so send an email to [email protected].

33 min

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