Rainer on Leadership

Approval Addiction, People Pleasing, and How Pastors Can Let Go


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Most pastors want to be liked and respected by their congregations. This desire is part of the reason they are motivated to serve others. However, approval addiction can become a major barrier to leadership. When people pleasing becomes the priority, pastors often do more harm than good in their congregations. Marty Duren joins Josh and Sam to discuss this important topic.

    1. The culture war makes us feel like we have to take a side on every issue.
    2. People pleasing feels holy, but it isn’t.
    3. Recognize your role is to shepherd, not fix everyone’s problems.
    4. Balance the shepherd’s heart with the prophetic voice.
    5. Release pressure with strategic silence and fewer words. 
    6. Stop mixing serving others with performing for others. 
    7. Receive criticism without internalizing it.
    8. Anchor your identity in Christ, not in the approval of others.
    9. Check out Marty’s new book! Order The Disparate Ones now!

      Resources:
      • The Southern Baptist Theological Seminary
        • Churchteams
          • “The Disparate Ones” by Marty Duren (affiliate link)
            • FREE Research Report! New Surprising Insights
              • Church Answers Central
                • The Hope Initiative
                • Episode Sponsors:

                    • You’ve been in ministry long enough to spot both the obstacles and the opportunities facing your congregation. 
                    • There must be solutions, but how do you find them? 
                    • If you are the ministry leader called to champion these issues, Southern Seminary has a problem-solving degree that will guide you to the answers. 
                    • From the moment you begin your doctor of ministry program at Southern, you will research the issues and start writing about the biblical solutions that will immediately benefit your church. 
                    • The academic sharpening that comes through your faculty supervisor and doctoral cohorts will strengthen both you and your church.
                    • Learn how Southern’s DMin can be an extension of your current ministry, not a distraction from it.
                    • The DMin at Southern Seminary will equip you to solve a problem or harness a ministry opportunity that will strengthen you and your church. Learn how at SBTS.edu/solutions.
                    •  

                       

                        • You see the need for systems to follow up on guests, volunteers, pastoral care; but right now that is really sporadic and siloed. Each person doing their own thing and people falling through the cracks. Churchteams will help you build and implement the system you need.
                        • Tired of not being able to get the help you need for your software? Churchteams support staff have all served on Church staff. They know the software and they know how churches work. Call, text, set up free support appointments.
                        • Integrated. How many different software systems are you using that require sharing people’s data? If 2 or more, you know the challenge and limitations of data in different systems that don’t play well together. Churchteams has all your people data in one place, including your communication data (email, texts, workflows).
                        • Ease of use. Do you feel like you should be getting more from your church software, but just can’t get people to use it? Churchteams makes it easy for guests, members, volunteers, and leaders to do everything they need to do including giving without having to create an account. Check it out to learn how.
                        • Reports. Are you getting the feedback on your ministry that you need from your database when you need it? Churchteams reports are extremely customizable. Let each staff save the ones they use on their dashboard. Or, schedule it to show up in their inbox.
                        • Learn more at Churchteams.
                        • The post Approval Addiction, People Pleasing, and How Pastors Can Let Go appeared first on Church Answers.

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                          Rainer on LeadershipBy Thom Rainer

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