Chef Evan Hennessy joins me for a deep conversation on resilience, vulnerability, leadership and about how he stumbled into the culinary world unexpectedly, as a dishwasher after failing out of Art School.

Evan is the Chef behind Stages in Dover, New Hampshire, a restaurant he opened in 2012, that has been named among the top 100 restaurants in the country several years in a row. Evan has also won Chopped ( ⁨@FoodNetwork⁩ ) three times. He was also named a 2026 James Beard Award semifinalist for Best Chef: Northeast. 

In this episode, we get into:
• why the phrase “the customer is always right” often breaks down in real life
• how Evan went from studying fine art to building a career in food
• the difference between hard work, resilience, and stubbornness
• why vulnerability matters in kitchens, leadership, and creative work
• how toxic kitchen culture develops and what healthy culture actually looks like
• why great food is about history, memory, land, and human connection
• how simplicity can be more powerful than complexity
• the mindset behind Stages and Evan’s newer travel concept, Finding Thyme

This was one of my favorite conversations because it’s really not just about food. It’s about craft, standards, community, and the courage to keep refining your work without letting the world flatten it into something generic.

Explore Evan’s work:
Stages https://www.stages-dining.com/
Finding Thyme https://www.findingthyme.org/

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In this episode of Ashes to Architects, Brian sits down with Aimee Blesing (actor trainer, voice/body/speech coach, dialect & accent coach, and longtime university instructor) for a wide-ranging conversation on what actually makes people freeze when they have to speak—whether it’s a keynote, a classroom, a Zoom meeting, an audition, or a hard conversation at home.

They get into why smart, capable people can still feel paralyzed in front of an audience, and how “confidence” often isn’t a personality trait—it’s attention, preparation, and the ability to regulate your nervous system in real time. Aimee breaks down what’s happening in the body when self-consciousness kicks in, why most people were never taught the execution side of communication, and how voice and presence are trainable skills—not traits you’re born with.

You’ll hear practical tools you can use immediately, including:

• Why your body can create anxiety even when nothing is “wrong”
• A simple 60-second reset before speaking: face, shoulders, breath
• The “smell breath” trick (shockingly effective)
• Why “box breathing” doesn’t work for everyone—and what might
• How to pause before you speak (especially in emotional moments)
• Why rehearsing delivery matters as much as writing content
• The difference between performing and being present—and why “trying to look cool” backfires
• How actor training concepts like giving & receiving apply to marriage, parenting, and leadership

Aimee also shares a personal turning point: childbirth and losing the voice/body connection she’d always relied on—an experience that reshaped her teaching into something more human-centered and compassionate, and helped her bridge coaching from performers into the professional world.

The episode closes on a powerful anchor: “To thine own self be true.” Not as a slogan—but as a real framework for communication, confidence, and identity.

If you’ve ever felt frozen, overly self-aware, or stuck in your head when it’s time to speak, this one will land.

Subscribe, share, and leave a rating if you want more conversations like this.

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Too many of us are working way too hard toward a life we didn't sign up for, in this episode, Brian gives you a practical way to determine if your trajectory aligns with what actually makes you happy.

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In this solo episode of Ashes to Architects, Brian gets brutally honest about a chapter of his life that shaped everything that came after: being “the fat kid,” becoming “the fat guy,” and finally deciding to change.

At his heaviest, Brian was around 320 pounds with a 46-inch waist, smoking a pack a day, eating like trash, and avoiding the gym out of pure embarrassment. But the turning point wasn’t a miracle plan or some perfect motivational wave — it was a simple decision to put himself in an environment that would force him to learn.

Instead of pretending he already knew what to do, Brian got a job at a health club. Not because he was fit — because he wanted to become the kind of person who was. That move created proximity, structure, and accountability. And once he started, everything began to compound.

He talks about:

• Why “identity” can trap you (and how to rewrite it)
• The real reason consistency becomes easier over time
• How the smallest changes (like cutting soda) can create massive momentum
• The underrated power of routines that feel rewarding (yes… even the post-workout shower)
• Why making positive changes can trigger weird reactions from people around you — and how to handle it with grace
• The difference between a temporary “diet” and a true lifestyle shift
• What it means to become a “higher version” of yourself — and why the old version can’t take you where you want to go

This episode is for anyone who feels stuck in an identity they didn’t choose — and needs a practical, grounded reminder that you don’t have to overhaul your life overnight… you just have to start.

If you got something from this, please subscribe, share, and leave a rating. It helps more than I can explain.

Hypnosis isn’t mind control — it’s a practical way to change patterns your willpower can’t reach.

In this episode of Ashes to Architects, I sit down with Hugh Sadlier, an 83-year-old hypnotist with 30+ years in practice and thousands of clients. Hugh recently released The Healing Power of Hypnosis, and we go beyond “quit smoking” to talk about what hypnosis actually is, how it works, and how real change happens when you work with the subconscious instead of trying to force it.

We unpack Hugh’s unique “4 R’s” approach (built after years of not fully resonating with the standard, suggestion-heavy method), how he teaches self-hypnosis in the first session, and what he’s learned helping people with anxiety, trauma, habits, performance slumps, and more — including a few stories that’ll make you rethink what’s possible.

What we cover:

• Hypnosis vs meditation, and who responds best
• The ethics: what to look for (and avoid) when choosing a hypnotist
• Why stress is higher now — and what it’s doing to people
• How habits become identity (and how to break the loop)
• Childhood roots, transgenerational “memory,” and even womb-level imprinting
• Past lives + karma (how Hugh approaches it, and how often it matters)
• The 4 R’s framework:
  1. Recognize the roots
  2. Release the impact
  3. Replace what was removed
  4. Reinforce until it sticks

Key takeaways:

• You can’t erase memories, but you can change their impact.
• A habit can be an old survival strategy running on autopilot.
• Reinforcement + repetition is what makes the change permanent.
• Always vet the practitioner’s method before you trust the process.

Chapters:

00:00 Why I wanted to interview Hugh

02:00 A powerful case story + why belief matters

06:00 “Direct suggestion” vs asking the subconscious

09:45 The 4 R’s explained (Recognize/Release/Replace/Reinforce)

15:30 Self-hypnosis basics + anchoring technique

18:10 Hypnosis vs meditation

21:00 Hugh’s origin story + career pivots

30:40 Hypnosis across history (rhythm, chanting, altered states)

34:10 What’s changed in 30 years (stress + modern life)

41:30 Why some people change faster than others

50:20 Transgenerational + womb “memory”

54:00 Past lives + karma as “memory”

1:10:40 Goals vs process + defining success as happiness

1:18:30 Ethics + when hypnosis is NOT appropriate

1:31:20 One-session breakthroughs (when it “clicks”)

Guest: Hugh Sadlier

Book: The Healing Power of Hypnosis

Website: hypno-health.net

Most people don’t get stuck because they lack discipline — they get stuck because they’re trying to choose the perfect path before they take a single step.

In this solo episode, I talk about why it’s not only okay to change your mind — it’s a sign you’re actually paying attention. As you gain more information, you should be allowed to move in a new direction. The hard part isn’t “setting intentions.” The hard part is getting honest about what you actually want… and what you’ve been chasing out of habit, ego, fear, or old versions of yourself.

I use a simple mountain-climbing metaphor to break down how people waste years over-preparing, trying to avoid picking the “wrong mountain,” and how iteration beats perfection every time.

• Why changing your mind is growth (not inconsistency)
• The difference between “intention” and actual honesty
• Why it’s easier to chase goals than to admit what you really want
• The “mountain peak” problem: reaching the top and realizing you picked the wrong thing
• Why people don’t start: fear of choosing wrong + perfectionism
• Why over-preparing (gear, research, planning) becomes procrastination
• The real power move: iteration and learning by moving

• You don’t need certainty — you need a first step
• Clarity is earned through reps, not thought experiments
• Perfectionism always costs more (time, momentum, confidence)
• The longer you wait to start, the harder starting becomes

If this hit for you, subscribe and share it with someone who’s been stuck in “thinking mode.” And if you’re listening on Apple Podcasts or Spotify, a quick rating helps this show more than I can explain.

When immigration enforcement dominates the headlines, it’s easy to forget the human math underneath it.

In bonus clip, Deo tells the true story of what happened after his father—part of the government in the Democratic Republic of the Congo—was assassinated. What followed was a long stretch of fear, impossible decisions, and a mother doing the unthinkable to protect her four children.

As ICE, detention, deportations, and enforcement actions stay at the center of the national conversation, this episode pulls the camera off the pundits and puts it on one family’s reality: what survival actually looks like when borders and paperwork aren’t a debate — they’re a wall.

In this clip, you’ll hear:

• The moment everything changed after the assassination
• How his mother used her Burundi background to create a path out
• The quiet strategies families use when the system feels impossible
• What it felt like to finally step onto a plane to the United States

This isn’t a hot take. It’s a lived experience.

If you’ve been caught in the immigration news cycle lately—whatever your stance—this story will land.

https://deomwano.com

⚠️ Content note: political violence/assassination, displacement, trauma.

#Immigration #ICE #RefugeeStory #DRC #Congo #Burundi #Asylum #AshesToArchitects

Brian talks with Deo Mwano, a speaker, creator & entrepreneur whose life began in the Democratic Republic of the Congo and was shaped by survival, migration, and rebuilding from scratch in the U.S. after his father was killed. Deo shares how his mother’s courage built deep self-worth, why trauma sometimes hits after stability, and the moment a forgiveness breakthrough freed him from years of internal anger.

They get practical on the “pause” between activation and reaction, how to unpack what you’re really holding onto, and why curiosity + proximity can change your trajectory. Deo also shares what he’s building now: his memoir The Request (planned for Oct, 2026), the Mirror motivation app, and a scholarship program funding students who can articulate perseverance.

Learn more about what he does: https://deomwano.com

In Austin for the week, drops a raw solo episode on why Ashes to Architects exists—and why you should stop waiting for the “right time” to start.

This is the origin story behind the show: growing up in a town of 400 with two physically disabled parents, surviving instead of thriving, getting bullied hard enough to battle depression before age 10, dropping out of high school, becoming a young father, and learning (the hard way) that you can’t do everything… but you can do a lot if you pick a direction and commit.

Brian also breaks down a practical tool for change: don’t just “build habits”—find the one part of the hard thing you genuinely enjoy (the reward you’d do voluntarily), and use that to pull you forward. For him, it started with workouts for the post-workout feeling… and it rewired everything else.

• Why this podcast exists (and why consistency beats confidence)
• The “I’m not supposed to accomplish anything” origin story
• Success redefined: money vs peace of mind vs real happiness
• Fear of being seen + learning to use your voice
• The “muse whisper” idea: why your vision isn’t random
• Weight loss as proof you can rewrite your identity
• A simple framework to make hard change sustainable

• You can do anything you’re built for—but you can’t do everything. Choose.
• If you wait until you’re ready, you’ll waste years.
• Ideas don’t belong to you. If you don’t execute, someone else will.
• The best “habit” is the part of the process you actually look forward to.

• 00:00 In Austin + why I’m recording anyway
• 01:30 Why this podcast exists (and the self-doubt story)
• 04:40 My upbringing: disability, survival mode, and “no blueprint”
• 10:40 You can do anything (but not everything)
• 14:50 Why I want creatives’ stories out in the open
• 17:10 The muse, ideas, and why you shouldn’t wait
• 20:30 Success isn’t money—it’s happiness
• 21:55 Weight loss, identity change, and proof you can rewrite your life
• 24:40 The tool: find the part of the hard thing you enjoy
• 26:10 Closing: comment what you’re building + subscribe
• 27:06 Credits

If this hit home, drop a comment: where are you at right now, and what are you trying to build?

In this episode, I sit down with Chris Sheehan (aka Christopher Talken), a core member of Still Gold—one of the most original, hard-to-categorize music collectives to come out of Boston.

Chris opens up about losing his father at 16 after a long battle with cancer, the “perfect storm” of grief + rebellion that followed, and the self-destructive years where escaping became a lifestyle. Then comes the plot twist: a move to Hawaii, years in a tight native-led community on Maui, and the slow rebuild that helped him heal enough to come back and keep creating—without letting ego, pressure, or the “artist identity” trap ruin the work.

We talk about the real artist experience: performing for 20,000 people one week and 7 people the next, balancing a day job (Chris is a chef) with touring, what sobriety actually looks like when you used alcohol to mask anxiety, and how fatherhood changes the definition of success. This is a conversation about music, mental health, community, and the long road from survival mode to a life you’re proud of.

• Christopher Talken — Performer / Musician STL GLD

• grief after losing a parent young + how it shapes identity
• self-destruction, anxiety, alcohol, and changing your relationship with it
• leaving everything behind and moving to Hawaii for a reset
• “island fever,” community healing, and coming back to a new world
• punk + hip hop crossover: Yo! MTV Raps, Headbanger’s Ball, The Arsenio Hall Show, and early influences like A Tribe Called Quest and N.W.A
• skateboarding as a “misfit community” and cultural gateway
• ego vs art: why pressure kills creativity
• day job vs “artist”: stability as a creative strategy
• masculinity, therapy, and learning to talk back to negative self-talk
• fatherhood, marriage, and redefining success as peace + happiness

• Healing isn’t one moment—it’s a series of decisions you keep making when nobody’s clapping.
• If the work hurts you, it’s time to change the relationship—not abandon the gift.
• Community can save you (sometimes it’s a band, sometimes it’s a skate crew, sometimes it’s a family that takes you in).
• “Success” gets real when it becomes: happy, stable, present, and proud.

• 00:00 — Why honest music is hard (and necessary)
• 05:32 — Who Chris is + STL GLD’s role as a collective
• 09:04 — Losing his father at 16, going numb, and acting out
• 12:40 — Escape mode: clubs, chaos, compartmentalizing grief
• 20:14 — Breaking point → leaving for Hawaii
• 23:25 — A decade out there: healing, simplicity, “talk story”
• 30:22 — Coming back: new world, new mindset
• 33:33 — Punk + hip hop roots, early influences + culture
• 38:41 — Skateboarding as the gateway + misfit belonging
• 55:00 — Goals, ego, and why “making it” can ruin the work
• 01:05:11 — Day job as a chef + balancing art and fatherhood
• 01:26:54 — Meeting his wife, sobriety, and dropping the “wild role”
• 01:36:09 — Masculinity, therapy, anxiety, and real self-work
• 01:47:42 — Legacy: happiness, “beating the odds,” and bonus time