Every comedian has bombed. Sometimes it’s an itty-bitty bomb. I call these cherry bombs. Sometimes it’s a big ol’ bomb that ruins everything in a thousand mile blast radius. I call these nuclear bombs. And I’ve been known to lob out a few nuclear bombs in my time.

Today’s episode is a conversation about big failure. About that feeling of “I ruined everything” and “what now?”

We’ve all been there and if you haven’t… don’t think you won’t.

After all, being human is a series of hard decisions riddled with a ton bad decisions.

It’s how we find our way. We make mistakes. We put them under the microscope. Understand why they exist, take ownership, and move the heck on.

Paste Article about How Comedians Handle Bombs

Patrice and Chappelle’s Thoughts on the Subject

What nuclear bombs in your life did you think you would never recover from?

What do you do when you’re caught in your own blast radius?

Episode Duration: 12:55

A B&E is short for “break and enter.” A crime. I know you thought maybe it stood for “beef and eggs” or “beetle and earwig” or “baby and enchilada” BUT NO. Break and enter.

I was in grade 4. And if you want to hear the story YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO LISTEN TO THE PODCAST!!!

But it’s a story about being too young to understand the weight of your mistakes, a story about trying to fit in, a story about going with the crowd instead of standing up for what’s right.

It was a story I fell into as a child but it’s a story we fall into time and time again. When it’s easier to do the wrong thing with the many than the right thing with the few. Or worse… the right thing when you’re completely alone.

Talk to Your Kids About Peer Pressure!!

Deal with Peer Pressure as an Adult Too

When did you go along with the crowd instead of sticking up for what’s right?

What’s the best way to do the right thing in a situation where the pressure’s on to do the wrong thing?

Episode Duration: 12:55

It’s become a personal mantra of mine: “No regrets, no future plans.” Anxiety tends to exist in the past and the future. Regrets anchor us to events of the past. Future plans have us running scenarios we can’t possibly control. Both paths lead to the same ravine.

I had a Facebook encounter earlier this week that served as another failure to communicate in the Age of Communication. I posted a quote because I was enamoured with the sentiment and was met with FACTS. Evil, distracting facts!

No, no, no… I don’t hate facts. I do however hate the impulse to spout facts simply because you know them. It’s like we can’t control ourselves. We’ve become overheated robots, sparks flying out our ears as every last fact in our short-circuiting robo-brain spews out our mouths until no one invites us over for dinner ever.

We’ve become socially weird. We’ve lost social grace.

Even me! Of course me! Instead of taking the time to discuss it maturely, because that would take effort and time I don’t want to spend on a one-sided debate, I podcast about it!

But I’m hoping it’s somewhat insightful and more an exploration of this new communication trend that’s been birthed by the hostile social media takeover.

These are just thoughts and feelings.

But don’t quote me

I’m pretty proud of that title. I talking about walking. I talk about Spotify. BOOM! Walkify! That’s some next-level creativity right there. Thank you, brain!

On today’s show, I talk about reinforcing positive change with methods catered towards your personal preferences. We all have likes, dislikes, things that excite us, things that deter us. Too many times we look at something that works for someone else and say, “Hey! That will work for me!”

It’s why fad diets fail and why workout regimens aren’t for everyone. You need to communicate to yourself. When you force yourself to do something that’s clearly against your nature completely, it just won’t last. To make lasting change, you need to find a way to adjust your strategy specifically to you or else you’ll break the habit.

My massive Spotify visualization playlist 

More visualization techniques

Do you take time to visualize? Why or why not?

What methods would work best for you to implement a new change into your life?

Episode Duration: 13:00

It almost feels like the podcast has reached it’s own kindergarten graduation! See how this works? First we’re talking about anti-heroes, then we naturally transitioned to heroes and villains, then ultimately transitioned to Good VS Bad. The graduation hat story is one of my earliest memory of facing a moral dilemma where I had to enforce a response to something BAD in the name of doing something GOOD.

Human complexity, it’s my favourite, most engaging conversation to have. It’s hard to simplify and easy to complicate. With marijuana legalization around the corner and the recent raids of the Cannabis Culture dispensaries, it’s a conversation worth having. People are getting arrested for something that is deemed wrong right now but will be deemed right in just a matter of months. Laws change. Rules change. Which means what is deemed right and wrong on a societal level also changes.

Which begs the question — what is right and what is wrong?

Sam Harris Can Talk About Morality Way Better Than Me

Challenge Your Morality with This Philosophical Experiment 

Are you inherently good or evil? Justify it.

What’s your earliest childhood memory of facing a moral dilemma?

Episode Duration: 14:17

So I’m going to let you in on a little secret. I got SUPER NERDY when lining up this episode. I knew beforehand I would be talking about Heroes and Villains at some point. I’m a little obsessed over the conversation between what makes someone a hero and what makes someone a villain. These are what I like to call “the Titans of Archetypes”. All good stories need a hero and all good stories need a villain but when we’re the main character of our own story – it’s hard to tell which side of the line we stand. But that’s not the part that’s super nerdy. I knew going into this conversation that I was going to bring up one of my all-time favourite Survivor seasons which was Survivor: Heroes VS Villains. So it was only appropriate that I saved this conversation for Episode 20 seeing as Heroes Vs Villains was Season 20! (I know… I’m WAY too weird about this stuff.)

On yesterday’s episode I talked about the uprise of the anti-hero in popular culture and today I’m shining a brighter light on the more classic tropes of heroism and villainy. What makes someone a hero or a villain? Is it the person or the situation?

Good and bad, right and wrong…

…it’s all become so subjective.

Order One of My All-Time Favourite Seasons of Survivor! 

Know Your Tropes

Are you a Hero or a Villain?

It’s not that simple? Well… at what points of your life have you been a hero and when would you say you were playing the villain? Who do you ultimately think you are?

Episode Duration: 14:30

With the new Beauty and the Beast on the horizons and all the laughable uproar about it’s live-action incarnation, I felt it was more-than-appropriate to talk about my favourite game to play with new friends: Disney Movie Psychobabble!

I’ve been playing this game for a while now. It’s where you ask someone what their favourite Disney movie was as a kid and then you psychoanalyze their childhoods based on their choice. Whether there’s a direct correlation or not is sort of besides the point. It’s more of a weird social exercise in imposing meaning. Humans are crafty animals that can make anything mean anything. It’s why empires rise and it’s the same reason why empires fall. Religion, politics, pop culture, relationships, beliefs, everything are based off of people imposing meaning to get what it is they’re looking for.

Strange to think life is that fragile that everything that hangs on the balance only hangs there if we say it does.

We decide what matters and what doesn’t.

Video on Freeing Yourself from Self-Importance

More Information on The Bystander Effect 

You Are Not So Smart – great book on psychological fallacies

What matters to you? Does it?

What was your favourite Disney movie as a child? Can you psychoanalyze yourself to connect the dots?

Episode Duration: 18:50

Oh man! It’s nice to talk about symbols and intentions when entering the process of self-reflection but it’s all for naught if you don’t put it to practice. On today’s episode, Clifford shares a story about the time he worked at a call centre, was self-absorbed in his undesirable situation, and had an opportunity to help someone in need but chose to go with the crowd and do nothing. That’s what today’s true story, “The Man in the Rain”, is all about.

Most of us don’t like sharing these kind of stories. When we’re sitting around our living rooms with guests over, we tend to only share the highlight reel. The top ten list of moments that make you look awesome. It’s hard sharing the moments where you come off like a complete d-bag.

A lot of these conversations about betterment typically dive into the nuances of what we need to look at when we’re looking at ourselves. You find these nuances in the moments you’re not proud of because those moments are always a response to something that needs to be addressed in your life. It can be fear, ego, a misplaced sense of entitlement… but if these go unaddressed, they will stay with you, and fester, and inevitably turn you into someone you don’t want to be.

Take note of these moments and do something about it. Respond.

Video on Freeing Yourself from Self-Importance

More Information on The Bystander Effect 

You Are Not So Smart – great book on psychological fallacies

What moments from your life are you not proud of that you need to be taking a deeper look at?

Have you ever participated in the bystander effect or been victim of it yourself?

Episode Duration: 12:37

On yesterday’s episode, Clifford explored the symbols driving him forward that he uses as a declaration of who he wants to be and where he wants to go. Today, Clifford talks about the symbols in his home that represent where he’s been and what he’s overcome. Sometimes it’s just as important to reflect on the past as it is to ponder on the future. The present tends to be a healthy mix of both. Listen to today’s episode to find out why Clifford has been looking down the barrel of the tequila gun.

Alcoholism isn’t a new conversation to this podcast or any podcast where Clifford Myers has a voice. It’s a subject he’s very open about because it’s been an undeniable struggle in his personal life. A common torch-passing in the alcoholic community is sharing wisdom. Sharing strategies. Sharing stories. These are the things other people struggling with alcoholism break into pieces and take what shards make sense for them. Good advice tends to be fragments of many pieces of advice.

Conversations like this are not only important for alcoholics but anyone being haunted or held back because of the past. The past has a way of altering the future in ways we feel like, “Hey, maybe we should know better?” But then, up again creeps the past and we end up falling into old habits, repeating old mistakes.

This episode is about reflecting on that the right way and using it as a symbol to drive you forward instead of an excuse to hold you back.

ADGS and AA – great addiction service organizations

Running with Scissors – beautiful memoir on addiction

What mistakes/demons from the past are you trying to grow away from?

What bad habits do you continue to repeat even though you know better?

Do you have a system in place to reflect on these things in a positive way? If not, what will you do to put such a system in place?

Episode Duration: 12:37

Clifford takes inventory of the symbols in his general work space. The place where he spends a large chunk of his creative and productive time. What does a stage photo, a Survivor drawing, a skull, three bottles and an uncashed cheque all have in common? Why is it important to impose meaning and how can these symbols help define your identity and direction? What’s on your wall that you look at every time you press pen to paper and ask, “How am I going to make an impact in this world?”

I’ve read a lot of books and articles about the importance of intention. Setting up your environment intentionally to represent what’s important for you, to reflect the kind of motivation that best speaks to who you are and what you need. These are things we need to do for ourselves. No one else will do them for us.

I got a small apartment but I’ve set up a desk space to reflect what’s motivational and contemplative for me so I can always re-ground myself. It helps knowing where your starting point is. What is your zero marker where everything begins again? Where you can create or rebuild from?

A cool company that focuses entirely on intentional environments

Learn more about how we’re affected our environment

Motivational symbol board about creating yourself

What kind of symbols would best represent you?

What do you need to create a space that’s both productive and motivating?

What do you need to change to create the person you want to be?

Episode Duration: 20:08