At-homish

Wil closes out Season 2 with Rebecca Calder, Ph. D., a Navy veteran, Top Gun graduate, researcher, military spouse, and mom raising teenagers. Together they explore what it means to belong when you're carrying multiple identities, and when perfectionism keeps trying to convince you that you have to earn your worth.

Becky shares how her view of belonging evolved from performance-based, proving you deserve a seat at the table, to values-based belonging rooted in service, family, faith, and excellence. She also tells a vivid story from early motherhood, watching Top Gun grad flights overhead while holding her Top Gun patch covered in her baby's vomit, as a turning point that helped her see she's more than any single role.

The conversation also highlights Becky's doctoral work on psychological capital and burnout. She breaks down the HERO framework: Hope, Efficacy, Resilience, and Optimism; and explains how these internal resources can be developed in leaders and shared across teams to build healthier, more human workplaces.

In This Episode, You'll Hear

• Why belonging can get confused with performance and how that feeds perfectionism
• What it was like being the first female pilot to graduate from Top Gun and why she felt she truly belonged there
• The "Top Gun patch covered in vomit" moment, and what it revealed about identity, transition, and grace
• Leadership as creating environments where people get support not criticism or unrealistic expectations
• Psychological capital: what it is, why it matters, and how it connects to burnout
• The HERO framework: Hope, Efficacy, Resilience, Optimism, and how leaders can build these capacities in others
• Resilience as "ordinary magic" and why incremental gains matter
• What's next for Becky: speaking, service, and the possibility of a book

Memorable Moments

• Becky reframes belonging as knowing your values and creating space for others to live theirs.
• She describes Top Gun as one of the first places she felt full belonging, because of shared commitment to excellence and growth.
• The motherhood story lands as a powerful reminder; you can be accomplished and still be in a hard season.

Closing Advice

Becky's biggest takeaway for listeners; never lose hope. Keep going. Resilience comes at a cost, but understanding what real resilience looks like can save you.

Movie + Music (Walk-up Moment)

Movie title: Called to Serve: A Story of Hope and Resilience

Who plays Becky: Charlize Theron

Theme song: "Girl on Fire" by Alicia Keys

Closing Vibe

A strong Season 2 finale that reminds us belonging isn't something you earn by being perfect. It's something you build from the inside out through values, service, and the courage to be human.

Wil welcomes back his first-ever repeat guest, Sarah Dylan Jensen (aka the Market Maven), the manager of the Snohomish Farmers Market and longtime farmers market leader across the region. What starts as a fun check-in (including a quick appreciation moment for Trent and the Red Trux production magic) turns into a timely conversation about community, safety, and food access—and what it means to feel “at home-ish” when the world feels anything but stable.

Sarah shares why authenticity matters—from the ethics of the fashion industry she once worked in, to how the farmers market chooses local artists and higher-quality, responsibly made merch that actually aligns with “support local.” From there, the episode gets real about the emotional whiplash of current events, the pressure to keep creating and leading while everything feels intense, and the challenge of speaking up when your “filter” can’t be fully off.

The heart of the conversation centers on food as a human right and the ripple effects of shrinking support systems. Sarah breaks down what’s happening with SNAP match funding at markets (dropping from $40 to $25 to $10), why that hurts both families and farmers, and how misinformation about assistance programs misses what she sees firsthand: hard working people, early mornings, and communities held together by relationships.

In This Episode, You’ll Hear About

• Why farmers markets are more than “cute local shopping”—they’re community infrastructure
• The ethics gap in fashion vs. values-driven local work
• How the market approaches merch responsibly (local art, better sourcing, aligned values)
• SNAP match funding cuts and what that means on the ground
• The difference between “stealing jobs” rhetoric and the reality of labor in agriculture
• How to stay engaged without burning out: capacity, roles, and small actions that matter
• Curiosity as a leadership skill: listening to understand, not just to respond
• Building relationships across differences (and not writing people off too fast)
• Walk-up song moment: Coldplay’s “A Sky Full of Stars” + a Van Gogh-inspired reminder that stars shine brightest in the dark

Closing Vibe

This episode is a reminder that when the world feels loud, uncertain, and exhausting, community is still something you can build on purpose—one market day, one conversation, one act of curiosity at a time.

Wil sits down with Adrianne Wagner, Executive Director/CEO of Leadership Snohomish County (LSC), executive coach, and community builder, for a real conversation about what leadership looks like when life is busy, the world feels heavy, and people are craving connection.

Adrianne shares her path from Flint, Michigan to Snohomish County, her long career as a healthcare executive, and the moment she "hit the wall" after the pandemic and major company changes. That burnout became a pivot point leading her back to school, into leadership coaching, and deeper into the work of developing leaders across every level (not just people with titles).

Together, Wil and Adrianne unpack the difference between leadership vs. authority, why "aggressively passive" culture can make feedback harder than it needs to be, and how toxic leadership creates ripple effects for the people who have to survive it. They also dig into what it means to level up instead of competing, and why leaders have a responsibility to create real space for others to grow.

The episode also spotlights Step Up, LSC's signature conference returning in person this year and how the theme - Step Up for what matters to you , is about moving beyond awareness into action, collaboration, and community.

In This Episode, You will Hear About

• Adrianne's leadership journey: Flint -> Snohomish County -> healthcare exec -> coach
• Burnout, recovery, and why she pivoted into coaching
• Leadership vs. authority: why titles don't automatically make leaders
• Toxic leadership, trust, and why we don't talk about the survivors enough
• Feedback culture: 360-style listening, patterns, and "no hangry leaders"
• Calling in well: using time off to refill your cup, not just recover from being sick
• Uncompete thinking: scarcity vs. abundance, envy vs. leveling up
• Community projects: asking orgs what they actually need ( cans with no can openers)
• Kids as teachers: bias, empathy, and small actions that matter
• Music as meaning: Jimmy Eat World, Hamilton, the Grey Album, and Wil's 2026 alarm song

Event + Links Mentioned

• Leadership Snohomish County: https://leadershipsc.org
• Step Up Conference: April 24 (in-person)
• Applications/nomination window opens in February (Signature Program begins in September)

Closing Vibe

This episode is equal parts leadership workshop and real-life check-in: a reminder that community is built on small, consistent choices and that the best leaders don't just win; they help other people win too.

Wil welcomes brothers Terry Hollimon and Torry Hollimon for a wide-ranging, funny, and deeply reflective conversation about what it means to show up, build trust, and create spaces where people belong.

The brothers share their origin story (Arkansas → Canada → Texas → Washington), how constant change taught them to read the room and find common ground, and why belonging isn’t about taking over a space—it’s about connecting inside it.

Torry opens up about becoming a single dad with full custody, how that led him into early childhood education, and why being present in schools—especially in communities where people of color are underrepresented—creates powerful ripple effects for kids and families.

Terry reflects on the rights and opportunities people take for granted today, the responsibility to honor the sacrifices of past generations, and the importance of using your gifts—whether you’re built like a “power truck” or a “Maserati.”

The episode also revisits Snohomish’s 2020 turning point, the difficult conversations that followed, and how dialogue can move a community from polarizing moments toward something stronger and more unified.

In This Episode, You’ll Hear About

• Why “showing up” is the foundation of belonging
• The Hollimon family journey across regions and cultures
• How Terry’s football path changed—and how his parents’ foresight made a new path possible
• Disarming a room: reading the environment, adapting without losing yourself
• Finding connection through common ground (sports, service, shared values)
• Why representation in schools matters—especially for kids watching from the sidelines
• The importance of voting and honoring the sacrifices behind today’s rights
• Snohomish in 2020: what happened, how it felt, and what it sparked afterward
• Walk-up songs, hype music, and the energy you bring into the moment

Call to Action

Wil challenges listeners to help the show reach all 50 states by the end of 2026—and to keep spreading the stories instead of “hoarding the information.”

Closing Vibe

This one’s equal parts laughter and life lessons—about legacy, community, and the truth that you never really know who you’re influencing… until someone tells you.

Wil sits down with John Agyopang—a longtime Snohomish County resident, former Boeing employee of 25 years, and the new president of the Snohomish County NAACP—for a conversation that blends civil rights, community work, and the deeper meaning of “home.”

John breaks down what the NAACP is (and what it looks like today), expanding the conversation beyond race into human rights, class, and access—for immigrants, Native communities, poor and working-class families, and anyone whose rights are being ignored.

From there, the episode turns personal and powerful: John shares his immigrant story from Ghana, including the childhood memory that shaped his view of America (USAID food aid) and his belief that what makes the U.S. “great” is the way immigrants bring their talent and dreams here.

Then Wil and John explore John’s newest mission: African Audacity Tours, a two-week, all-inclusive trip to Ghana designed to help people reconnect with history and identity—standing where enslaved ancestors stood, walking the ancestral slave path, and participating in a moving African naming ceremony.

In This Episode, You’ll Hear About

• What the NAACP stands for and how its mission has evolved
• “Not all skin folk are kinfolk”: why allyship is bigger than appearances
• Contextual privilege, identity, and how power shifts by setting
• John’s immigrant story and why he believes America is already “great”
• African Audacity Tours: the two-week Ghana experience (history, culture, legacy)
• The ancestral slave walk + what it means to return to the exact ground
• The naming ceremony: being welcomed “home” and reclaiming identity
• Local community work: diversion programs, mentorship, and financial literacy
  • Partnership with Wally Webster’s Access Project
  • Adult financial literacy + refurbished laptops with Millennium Industries / Rev. Leilani Miller
  • Youth tutoring support through Make It Worthy
  
  

Call to Action

If you’ve ever wanted to travel to Ghana (or Africa) but didn’t know how to do it safely and affordably, John shares how to connect:

• Website: https://www.africanaudacity.com

Wil also challenges listeners to help the show reach all 50 states by the end of 2026—and to share the podcast instead of “hoarding the information.”

Closing Vibe

This episode is a reminder that we have more in common than we think, and that real progress starts when we stay open—open to stories, open to each other, and open to the places that shaped us.

Wil welcomes two North Everett “neighbors” to the studio: Ashley Bolden (Keller Williams Realty, Everett) and Cami Anthony (Motto Mortgage Collective). What starts as a conversation about homeownership quickly turns into a bigger, more honest discussion about belonging, community, and the values underneath the housing market.

Ashley shares how her community involvement (including the Greater Everett Chamber of Commerce, Everett Recovery Café, and Everett Rotary Club) shapes how she thinks about housing as more than an investment. Cami brings the lender perspective—what it actually takes to qualify, why timing the market is a trap, and why the bigger barrier often isn’t the down payment anymore… it’s the monthly payment.

Together, they unpack the tension a lot of people feel: wanting your home value to rise, while also wanting housing to stay attainable for others. They explore how renters and homeowners can experience community differently, why “money” can feel strangely abstract, and why housing affordability ultimately requires more than policy tweaks—it may require a cultural values shift.

In This Episode, You’ll Hear About

• Why community involvement matters in real estate and lending
• The role of the Everett Chamber, Rotary, and Everett Recovery Café
• Renting vs. owning: the mindset shift and how it affects belonging
• Why trying to “wait for rates to drop” can backfire
• What lenders are seeing: debt-to-income realities and qualification limits
• Supply vs. demand, private equity, and why housing prices keep climbing
• The tension between equity, inclusion, and the realities of homeownership
• Why values (not just dollars) drive the systems we live in

Walk-Up / Theme Songs

• Cami’s pick: “It’s Oh So Quiet” by Björk (quiet entrance… until it gets loud)
• Ashley’s picks: “X” (Black Panther soundtrack) and “Handlebars” by Flobots

Closing Thought

This episode is for anyone who’s trying to make sense of the housing market without losing the bigger picture: a home isn’t just a financial asset—it’s safety, stability, and a place to belong.

In this deeply moving conversation, Wil reconnects with Renee Smith, a researcher, writer, and advocate for love-centered leadership who has dedicated the last decade to transforming workplaces from spaces of fear into environments of connection and belonging. Their relationship spans nearly 20 years, from Wil's days as ASB president at UW-Tacoma to their current collaboration in making work—and the world—more loving and human.

Renee shares the powerful origin story of her life's work: a conversation with a leader who said the most important job was to "eliminate fear from the workplace." This sparked her realization that when fear decreases, something must take its place—and that something is love. She defines love as "the energy that uplifts and connects," and explains how this energy belongs in every aspect of our lives, from interactions with strangers to the structures and systems of our organizations.

The conversation moves through vulnerable territory, exploring the burden of perfectionism, the concept of "shitty first drafts," and the challenges of showing up authentically in spaces where we may not feel safe. Renee shares a raw, real-time story about her 15-year-old grandson living with her family after housing loss, and how even at her own dinner table, the need for connection and being seen is visceral and undeniable.

This Episode Touches On:

• The evolution of a 20-year friendship and professional relationship
• Love-centered leadership: what it means and why it matters
• The three pillars: love your team, embed love in your organization, love yourself
• Confident vulnerability as a leadership practice
• The burden of perfectionism, especially for marginalized identities
• Building trust and relationship in adversarial situations
• The importance of thriving wages and corporate responsibility to communities
• Employee experience and understanding what people truly need
• The gap between leaders and team members, and how to close it
• Creating authentic belonging vs. wearing masks to fit in
• The physical and emotional impact of not being seen or acknowledged
• Tipping the planet from fear to love by 2035

Memorable Quotes:

"Love is energy that uplifts and connects. We need this energy everywhere." - Renee Smith

"If you don't know your rights, you really don't have any." - Referenced from previous conversation

"We need each other. We need each other emotionally. We need each other physically." - Renee Smith

"Belonging is mutual." - Wil

"Leaders are people too. They are just people too, who are scared more often than you'd realize." - Renee Smith

"We don't have to wait for somebody else to do that. We do that every day." - Renee Smith on tipping the scales

"It matters if I look at you, it matters if I ask how you're doing. All of those little things matter because they tell us we're safe. We're at home-ish." - Renee Smith

Guest Information:
Renee Smith (pronouns: she/her)

• Founder, Center for a Loving Workplace
• Researcher, Writer, Speaker, and Teacher
• Former Director of Workplace Transformation, State of Washington
• Podcaster and Loving Leader
• Lifelong Washingtonian, Grandma, Mom, Sister
• On a mission to tip the planet from fear to love by 2035

Walk-Up Song: "September" by Earth, Wind & Fire

Why This Song: It's the song that marks when Renee and her husband became a couple (September 21, 2020), and they dance to it everywhere they go. It brings the right vibe and gets everyone dancing—which is exactly what love-centered leadership does.

Resources Mentioned:

• Center for a Loving Workplace: lovingworkplace.org
• Make Work More Human: makeworkmorehuman.com
• The Four Pivots by Shawn Ginwright
• Work by Sylvester McNutt on therapy and storytelling

In this powerful conversation, Wil sits down with Anthony Upchurch, a Navy veteran who made Washington his home after being stationed at Whidbey Island in 1992. What starts as a discussion about Southern roots and military service quickly evolves into a deep exploration of community, belonging, and what it means to show up authentically for one another.

Anthony and Wil share stories from their upbringings—from grandmother's backhands to the importance of "reading the room"—while tackling heavier topics like the role of mentorship, the challenges facing young people without support systems, and the critical need for accessible resources in every household. Anthony opens up about his work with Legal Shield, driven by a mission to provide equal access to legal protection for families regardless of their social status.

This Episode Touches On:

• The culture shock of moving from the South to the Pacific Northwest
• Military service and the discipline it instills
• The importance of vulnerability and trust among men
• Creating spaces where people can be their authentic selves
• Community support and showing up for one another
• The value of mentorship and having role models
• Protecting families through accessible legal resources
• The power of breaking bread together across cultures
• Mental health and dealing with suppressed trauma
• Being present and reading the room in different spaces

Memorable Quotes:

"If you don't know your rights, you really don't have any." - Anthony Upchurch

"You want to find out what you're full of, pour it into somebody else." - Anthony Upchurch

"You're only a prayer away." - Anthony's grandmother

"We are one." - Anthony's philosophy on community

Guest Information:

Anthony Upchurch

• Navy Veteran (stationed 1992)
• Legal Shield Representative
• Community Advocate
• Father and Mentor
• Snohomish County Resident

Walk-Up Song: "We Are One" by Maze

Why This Song: Because we're all connected, and Anthony believes in showing up for people—whether he knows them or not—in moments of celebration or struggle.

In this special episode of At-homish, host Wil takes us on a reflective journey through Season 2's most powerful moments, so far, reminding us that belonging doesn't have to be burdensome or complex—it calls on us to be curious, present, and vulnerable.

Opening with a deeply personal story from 48th Street Pub and Grill in Tacoma, Wil shares how a spontaneous moment of vulnerability—dancing and crying to classic songs with friends—led to an unexpected connection with a tough-looking biker who declared, "Any man that is vulnerable enough to let go like that in public, that's a man's man right there."

Featured Voices and Themes:

Seth on Service: "If I give you all my money, well, I'm broke. But if I give you all of me, my life gets really darn good."

Elizabeth on Recovery: A powerful testimony about saying "I'm an alcoholic" out loud for the first time and how admitting our struggles takes away their power. Coming up on nine years sober, she reminds us why sharing our stories can save lives.

Lori on Domestic Violence: Breaking the silence and shame around DV, emphasizing how sharing our stories opens opportunities for others to come forward and find support.

Kid Sensation on Purpose: Discussing his book "Kings: Young Men Discovering Purpose and Shaping Their Destiny" and the wisdom gained from life's lessons.

Wally's Pivotal Moment: An 81-year-old's incredible story of being told he wasn't "college material," only to have one stranger's intervention change everything—leading to a 32-year career rising to senior vice president at Bank of America.

DeLon on Inner Journey: "The journey's not always outward sometimes... You got to do a lot of soul searching, figure out what's best for you and your tribe."

Jeff on Honesty: The transformative power of being honest with yourself first: "If I don't want to do something, you won't see me there. And you can always tell what I want to do because you'll see me doing it."

Erica's Tree of Life: A moving story about driving past a tree she planned to crash into, choosing instead to discover herself, and now calling it "the tree of life" as a reminder of the importance of self-discovery and community.

Toni on Marketing and Inclusion: "Nothing you do in marketing is ever about you... Inclusion is not about what I want. It's really understanding the people around us."

LaRae on Special Olympics: Creating space and patience for athletes to be themselves, recognizing that everyone's timeline and process looks different.

Catherine on Growth: Embracing vulnerability and admitting "I totally sucked and I needed to learn and I needed to grow"—showing that persistent trying and consistent showing up creates ripple effects of impact.

Nick and Richard on Representation: The importance of intentional diversity in marketing and platforming voices that represent everybody, not just certain types of people.

Key Takeaways:

• Don't be ashamed of your story—it will inspire others
• Vulnerability is strength, not weakness
• Service to others enriches our own lives
• Saying our truths out loud breaks through barriers
• One person's intervention can change a life trajectory
• The journey within is just as important as the journey outward
• Inclusion means understanding and serving others, not ourselves
• Creating space for people to be themselves is essential
• Our stories are unwritten—stay curious, not judgmental

Wil's Closing Wisdom:

"Belonging does not have to be burdensome or complex. We don't have to know everything. We don't have to have read everything, but it really calls on us to be curious, calls on us to smile, to answer that phone call, reply to that email, to show up and be present. That's where we can really work to build community and create spaces where we belong."

Merch Available: At Snohomish Apothecary and online at the website. If Wil sees you wearing it on the streets, he will say hi!

Remember: Be curious, not judgmental. When we're curious, we receive information, which allows us to wise up and we rise up.

Peace out.

In this powerful episode of At-homish, host Wil sits down with DeLon Lewis, a program specialist, entrepreneur, and artist who's making waves in diversity and equity work across Snohomish County. DeLon shares his journey from community organizing at Portland State University to earning his Master's in IT Management, all while building his record label "All Day Originals" and clothing line "All Day Lifestyle."

This conversation dives deep into the complexities of showing up authentically in professional spaces while staying true to hip-hop culture and community roots. DeLon opens up about the importance of intergenerational connection, working with formerly incarcerated youth, and his involvement with a grassroots organization spanning from San Francisco to the Philippines.