Audio Tidbits

We are told that we should accept the things we can’t change, but should we really? The truth of the matter is that I don’t think that I know what that means. Whether I do or don’t, I do know that it likely doesn’t matter whether I accept what I can’t change or not. Things and people are pretty much as they are and there isn’t much we are going to do about that; and trying to move that rock is one big waste of our time and energy.

If you think I should change, I might change but…. Sure, there is always a but. It could happen but most likely not any time soon or in the way you want me to change. If you don’t opt to just give up on me, your time and energy will be best invested in helping me succeed in being who I want me to be. Please press play and consider how that might work.

I have remixed an earlier episode of Audio Tidbits Podcast. It’s a group of tips and suggestions for making a difference for people who make a difference for you. I think you will likely enjoy all of the tips and may find one or two that particularly resonate for you. Please listen and pick out the little tips that work best for you.

It started with a temper tantrum. It didn’t amount to much. He was only 3 and the truth of the matter is that it was kind of cute. Then he was 15 and it was actually out of hand, but still not worth the hassle and expense of getting some outside, professional help. Then he was 20 and there was no hope for it. He was just going to be difficult. And then along came family violence. I don’t understand. He certainly didn’t grow up that way.

Sure, substitute she for he and the sad story is unchanged. In this episode of Audio Tidbits Podcast, I revisit temper tantrums and the importance of managing them gently and thoughtfully when your child is very young. Please listen and think about it along with me.

Do you know that there are refugees in Cleveland? Who are they; why are they there; should they be there? Please listen and decide for yourself.

Did you ever play cowboys and Indians? Maybe you are too young to have that childhood pastime as part of your history. You might even be so young that even knowing how to play cowboys and Indians didn’t make it into your skill set. If you want to test your non-digital playtime acuity, try this very short pop quiz.

Question:

When a few children – almost always all boys – got together to play cowboys and Indians, how did the kids decide who were the Indians?

Answer:

They usually didn’t. There were only cowboys. The Indians were a figment of their vivid imaginations.

Question:

What was the point of playing cowboys and Indians?

Answer:

To run around stealthily and somewhat randomly while shooting imaginary Indians with cap cracking six-shooters.

How did you do? If you passed the quiz with flying colors, you also know that the Indians always lost, and the cowboys never failed to vanquish those primitive savages. The good guys always won and the bad guys always either died during the battle or tucked tail and ran.

Are you up to another test of your non-digital acuity? If so, let’s play any variation of good guys and bad guys. The good guys were a lot like cowboys but were intent on ridding the range of outlaws and rustlers. The story changed only in the details and criminal transgressions.

Once I was a little squirt,

Silver buttons on my shirt,

I’d climb atop my wooden steed,

Be quickly off with lightening speed.

I’d ride the range from east to west,

A silver star pinned on my chest,

A holstered gun in easy reach,

Villains to catch and lessons to teach.

On winter days and summer nights,

Bar room brawls and wild gun fights,

My lawman life would twist and spin,

Nary a doubt about who would win.

The black hats fell; the white hats stood.

Justice prevailed; evil bested by good.

Rules were simple, no room for doubt.

Break the law, you get taken out.

The story could be continued in any of a thousand directions, but the theme never changes. It’s easy to tell the good guys from the bad guys, the winners from the losers. There is no ambiguity, no shades of gray. The world clearly splits into good and bad, right and wrong, just and unjust, the white hats and black hats.

I now know that our reality isn’t so easily understood and truly never was. That world of right versus wrong, good guys versus bad guys, just versus unjust was and still is but a myth perpetuated to shield unsuspecting children and naive adults from the harsh truth. Winners do cheat and cheaters frequently win. Right doesn’t always prevail over wrong. Police and priests don’t necessarily make moral choices or serve as good role models for the rest of us. Politicians and our civic leaders are often less committed to the welfare and well-being of the rest of us than to their personal interests and self-dealing schemes. Trustworthy news source is an oxymoron along with personal privacy and secure employment; and whatever you think is solid enough that you can take it to the bank is something to hold on to, since the bank may not be there when you arrive.

We find ourselves in what seems like a far different reality than the one we knew in years past. The President sometimes lies and misleads. Congress and our legislatures play power politics instead of pursuing the art of negotiation and compromise. The Supreme court in Washington and the Supreme courts in our states, along with the lower courts, are more political than objective, more partisan than neutral. The FBI and other public institutions are at least as controlled by interest groups and politicians as by justice, fairness, and the rule of law.

This is a little lesson in leadership for those of us who may lead a little too timidly or perhaps are apt to lead too aggressively or impulsively. There is a leadership sweet spot, and finding it is an important key to leadership success. Please listen and consider whether or not you are finding the leadership sweet spot.

Are you mostly a person who is passing virtue or are you more apt to stay in the virtue zone? It’s a pretty simple choice, but making it is very far from easy or obvious. Perhaps you will choose to take a few minutes to check out a conversation I was having with my digital friend, a self-rated expert on most everything.

Sometimes a surprise is a good thing and sometimes not. How would you like six ways to surprise people in that special good way? Please listen. They are here for you.

How often do you have to deal with difficult situations, difficult people or times when what to do, what to say, or how to proceed are unclear? What about those moments when you are tempted to do or say something just to get past the immediate stress and discomfort? It just may be that it is time to step back to step up. Press play and listen to see how that strategy would work for you.

Do you know about know-it-alls? Sure you do. The KIA’s are out there and driving us up the wall or at least it feels like they are, especially when our patience and sensitivity are running low. At those times, saying, “Thank you for sharing that with me,” seems like the last thing we want to say to them. Even so, it may be our best choice. Listen and decide whether you agree.