Welcome to the 29th birthday of the Hubble telescope and, as Britain prepares to isolate itself, we also look at the anniversary of Robinson Crusoe. Today, Phil Dobbie also looks at the regulators block on the Sainsbury Asda merger, and asks why not? Plus, look out for the cast of the new Bond movie today and why people are not having their kids immunised. Phil gives one compelling reason for the anti-vaccine crowd to change their mind.

Twitter made record earnings in the last quarter, thanks to online advertising. But have you ever clicked on an online ad, except by accident? The Extinction Rebellion are figuring out what to do next when it comes to raising the same of urgency over climate change, just as Britain goes 90 hours without burning coal to power the national grid. And Donald Trump is coking to town, but won’t be addressing parliament. Balls Radio suggests he should be allowed in to Westminster, provided he takes Q&A. Plus, a day to remember the 1916 Easter Rebellion. Is it time to hand back that last bit of Ireland?

The three top stories of the day, covered quickly on the new Balls Radio:
President Trump is set to impose sanctions on anyone who buys oil from Iran, no exceptions. Is he getting ready for regime change?
Brexit talks resume today, but the main focus of the Tory party seems to be getting rid of Theresa May. Could we really end up with Boris as PM?
Another Trump visit. Word has it that another trip is planned for the President to visit the UK in June. He is already coming to France, then he realised how close it is.
And happy birthday to the Baird.

On today’s Balls Radio Phil Dobbie spreads fear that a hard Brexit could mean a sudden lack of soft toilet paper. As a confirmed Brexiteer, he argues why another referendum is the only way forward, and suggests Brexiteers should want it too. Otherwise, the future lies with Theresa May’s deal, which will inevitably lead to a very soft Brexit at the end of the transition period. And a further two years of angst in the process.

It’s world frog day, now officially recognised by Balls Radio. But, Phil Dobbie asks, can Toads be involved too? He also looks at tax changes this year and asks, why does Philip Hammond insist on making everything so bloody complicated. As if tax codes weren’t complicated enough next month he just adds to the confusion. Plus, can you summarise a book in a tweet?

We’d be shocked if mainstream media and politicians sprouted fundamentalist Islamic extremism. In Britain, a few right-wing nut jobs might be given a little media exposure, but in Australia they are given prime time TV shows. More shocking is how a Queensland politician used the atrocity as an opportunity to quote a passage from the bible to justify the actions of the shooters. How has society got so much wrong. The political process has to take part of the blame – the UK needs to avoid a voting system like Australia if we are to avoid seeing extremists like this sitting in the House.

Is Theresa May’s voice croaky because she is tried and overworked, or is it because the Devil has taken control of her body? On today’s Balls Radio, Phil Dobbie examines the possibly work of Satan in the Brexit process. Are Brexiteers really devil worshippers set to destroy our life and turn us to the dark side. Or is Jean Claude Juncker the Devil incarnate, speaking to us in his strange, incomprehensible tongue (French)? Either way, an exorcism seems to be the only way out of Europe.

The two of Fair Haven in Vermont has voted in a goat as Mayor. At any other time it would seem ridiculous, but now, given the state of politics, perhaps they have the right idea. On today’s Balls Radio Phil Dobbie asks whether we should ask the goat what to do next on Brexit – we need some fresh thinking.

Theresa May said, with a straight face, that there was no correlation between rising crime and falling police numbers. But, as Phil Dobbie discusses in today’s Balls Radio, even her Home Secretary David Javid, doesn’t believe her. Listen in to find out why the end of March will see the end of May, and the steps to a People’s Vote, whether you want one or not.

Celebrities are dying at an alarming rate. What’s going on. Phil Dobbie investigates. Well, investigates is a big word – he talks about it. Plus, the obvious answer to Brexit that even George Galloway agrees with. And sperm, have you counted yours?