Be the Sun, Not the Salt

After years of recording together, “Be the Sun, Not the Salt” is now a complete series of 80 episodes that form a timeless toolkit for living more heliotropically. What does it mean to be heliotropic? Human beings, like plants, naturally turn toward what sustains life. We are energized by kindness, gratitude, compassion, vulnerability, and authenticity, and drained by pessimism, cynicism, disrespect, and unkindness. This simple metaphor is the heart of the show and an invitation for each of us to be our best self more often.

Across the series you will hear conversations with researchers and heliotropic exemplars such as Curt Menefee, Will Guidara, Ethan Kross, and David Horsager; chapter deep dives into Be the Sun, Not the Salt; short Gentle Nudges that remind you how to actually practice this in daily life; and practical answers to real “How Do I” questions about applying the tips and tools.

The episodes are designed to be evergreen. You can start anywhere, return whenever you need a reset, and hear something new each time you listen. As we created this body of work, we kept discovering and rediscovering the material ourselves and growing along with it. That ongoing personal evolution is the point, and our hope is that these 80 episodes will remain a resource you can carry with you and keep using over time.

If you're new to the show, this trailer will introduce the metaphor, the tone, and the kinds of support you can expect. If you're returning, it is a reminder that everything you need is already here, ready for whenever you need a little more sun and a little less salt.

Thank you for sharing our journey and mission!

Useful Links:

The book

The podcast website

The ecosystem

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever catch yourself thinking, “They should really listen to this podcast” or “If only they would read the book”? In this “whole shebang” episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine cut straight to the heart of the practice: this work is about you (or me), not fixing everyone else.

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why focusing on other people’s saltiness pulls you right into judgment, blame, and your own bad habits.
• How getting triggered by someone’s behavior is the signal you have work to do on your own reactions, not theirs.
• The gift of frustration as a cue to pause, regulate emotions, and choose “act, not react” instead of frothy annoyance.
• How rereading chapters, asking “How can I be my best self today?” and the “prehab” mindset prepare you for anything life throws at you.
• Real stories of letting go of “how come?” spirals, handling cancer diagnoses with gratitude, and turning treatment rooms into places of appreciation.
• A reminder that you control your state of mind and body, no matter what others do or don’t do.

This is the episode that ties it all together: stop pointing fingers outward and turn the energy toward becoming more of your best self every day. Perfect for a reset or anyone who needs the “kit and caboodle” in one listen.

Helpful Links:

• Be the Sun, Not the Salt book by Dr. Harry Cohen (read a chapter daily for your prehab practice)
• Ethan Kross episode on emotional regulation (distanced self-talk, cooling your jets, and metabolizing triggers)

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

What if the biggest difference you make today comes from something so small and simple that you usually skip it? In this Gentle Nudge episode, It’s so easy to do, it’s easy NOT to do, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine explore how tiny choices - kind or salty - shape your day, your relationships, and your impact far more than you think. 

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• The “chapter 31” idea Harry wishes he had squeezed into Be the Sun, Not the Salt and why the book still keeps growing in relevance years later. 
• The paradox that being kind, thoughtful, and present is genuinely easy, and so is being snarky, short, or dismissive. 
• How quick jokes, subtle digs, or “just being funny” can quietly wear on people, especially when they pile up. 
• Real stories of catching salty habits in marriage, meetings, and casual conversations, and what it feels like to simply not say the thing. 
• Gentle prompts to notice recent moments when you missed a chance to be a little sunnier or to clean something up with a simple, “I’m sorry, I do know your name.” 
• A 1% approach to both sides: being a bit kinder and a bit less salty, in ways so small they are actually sustainable. 
• How this all connects to James Clear’s habit idea that for anything to stick, it has to be easy, and how to make “tiny sun moments” the easiest option in your day. 

If you’re looking for a light but meaningful reset, this episode offers a warm reminder that knowing is not doing, and that the smallest moves can turn you into more of a positive energizer and less of a “negatoid.” 

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

What if becoming more trustworthy started with something as small as keeping one tiny promise today? In this final guest episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine sit down with trust expert David Horsager to explore why trust is the ultimate competitive advantage and how “little things, done consistently over time” can transform teams, relationships, and entire organizations. 

What you’ll hear

• Why trust is not a “soft skill,” but the root cause underneath leadership issues, engagement problems, sales slumps, innovation blocks, and culture breakdowns. 
• The eight pillars of trust and how they give you a practical framework, not just a motivational poster. 
• How David’s “how, how, how” process helped leaders triple sales, transform health goals, and even save marriages by getting to one clear, doable next step. 
• Why gratitude shows up as the most magnetic trait in the research and how it quietly erases entitlement, selfishness, and negativity. 
• Real stories of trust being rebuilt after big mistakes, from everyday workplace missteps to public leadership blunders and even political reconciliations. 
• A simple but demanding truth: trust is only rebuilt when you make and keep a new commitment, not just a great apology. 
• Concrete ways to apply this work at home, in friendships, and with colleagues, not just in the C-suite. 

If you’re thinking about who you want to be in the new year, as a leader, partner, friend, or teammate, this conversation gives you both the inspiration and the tools to start building (or rebuilding) trust in small, meaningful ways. 

Useful Links

• David’s book The Trust Edge
• David’s book Trust Matters More Than Ever (40 practical tools for building trust) 
• David’s book Trust at a Distance: Six Strategies for Building Trust Remotely 
• Trust Edge Leadership Institute and The Trust Outlook annual study on trust (free access for listeners mentioned in the episode) 
• Atomic Habits by James Clear
• Be the Sun, Not the Salt by Dr. Harry Cohen

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

What if the most powerful thing you did today was simply not say the snarky comment in your head? In this “How Do I…” episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine zoom in on the often-overlooked half of the heliotropic equation: learning how not to be the salt in big moments and tiny, everyday interactions. 

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why even one sarcastic eye-roll or extra “unnecessary sentence” can hit five times harder than a kind word. 
• How noticing what you don’t say or do can quietly transform your relationships at home and at work. 
• A simple 1% mindset that makes “being less salty” feel doable instead of daunting. 
• How tiny choices (biting your tongue, skipping gossip, resisting that jab) compound over time like behavioral interest. 
• The ripple effect of snark, gossip, and subtle disrespect when other people are watching and absorbing your energy. 
• Encouragement to apologize when needed, but to need those apologies less often as you practice. 

If you want to lower the emotional “toxicity level” you bring into rooms, conversations, and relationships, this episode offers clear, concrete nudges to help you be just a little less salty and a lot more intentional.

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever wish you could feel less awkward, nervous, or unsure when you step into something new? In this “How Do I…” episode of *Be the Sun, Not the Salt*, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine talk about what it really takes to become more comfortable with being uncomfortable, so you can stretch, grow, and still feel like yourself along the way. 

Here’s what you’ll hear:  

• Why discomfort is often a sign of learning, not failure, and how experience slowly reshapes your confidence. 
• How gym reps, social “muscles,” and public speaking all reveal the same secret about growth and repetition.
• Simple ways to step into situations where you are not the expert in the room and still feel grounded.
• How feedback, preparation, and tiny practice moments can turn “I’m not ready” into “I can do this.”
• A nudge to stop overthinking, stop blaming the world, and start taking small actions that build competence.
• Encouragement to lean toward the thing that makes you squirm a little, instead of backing away from it every time.

If you are tired of feeling stuck on the sidelines because something feels scary or unfamiliar, this episode offers straightforward, compassionate reminders to help you walk into discomfort with a bit more courage and a lot more intention.

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever replay something you did and think, “Wow, I am the absolute worst”? In this “How Do I…” episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine get real about what it means to practice self-compassion when you mess up, from small everyday slip-ups to the big, public, ego-bruising kind. 

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why beating yourself up is usually just a bad habit in disguise, not deep truth about who you are. 
• How to catch that harsh inner voice in the act and swap it for something kinder and more helpful. 
• Simple phrases and little mindset shifts that can turn “I’m an idiot” moments into “Okay, oops, what now?” moments. 
• The power of laughing at yourself, using your own name, and even smiling on purpose when you want to cringe. 
• What to do when the mistake is not private but public, and your ego feels like it has been hit by a truck. 
• How honest acknowledgment, clean apologies, and “start again” energy can actually increase trust with other people. 
• Gentle reminders that mistakes are where the practice happens and that you can be the sun to yourself, not just everyone else. 

If you are tired of being your own harshest critic and want practical, real-world ways to treat yourself with more warmth when you blow it, this episode offers relatable stories and small, doable shifts you can try right away. 

Useful Links:

The Ethan Kross episode

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever feel like life’s curveballs are just waiting to knock you sideways? In this empowering “How Do I…” episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine explore the art of “prehab” over rehab: getting your mind, body, and spirit ready for whatever challenges come your way, so you bounce back stronger instead of just surviving.

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why swapping worry for smart preparation can turn potential disasters into manageable moments
• The power of building resilience through everyday “to-dos” that keep you energized and clear-headed
• How leaning into physical health, emotional check-ins, and simple gratitude can fortify you against stress
• Tips for surrounding yourself with the right people (your “corner man”) to weather storms together
• The difference between talking about problems and actually taking action that builds your inner strength
• Gentle reminders that investing in yourself today pays off big when tomorrow gets tough
• Why even small, consistent habits create a flywheel of goodness that carries you through uncertainty

This mini “How Do I…” episode is perfect for anyone facing job worries, life transitions, or just the general unpredictability of being human.  Start building the foundation to be resilient and ready for life's challenges with a little practical wisdom, right here.

Useful Links:

Tim Storey’s episode, where he talks about the important of having your own “corner man” and knowing who would be in your “green room” to help move you forward with positivity

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Is gratitude journaling just woo-woo nonsense or can you really rewire your brain by writing it all down? In this practical “How Do I…” episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine get real about gratitude habits that actually work, even for skeptics and self-improvement dropouts.

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why you do not need to win a gratitude competition to benefit from the science
• Harry’s “three things and done” system, and the surprisingly powerful effect of keeping it simple
• Connie’s journey from eye-rolling cynic to accidental gratitude practitioner, and how it started with coffee and silence
• How eating chia seeds and reframing “have to” as “get to” can flip your day around more than you think
• The flexible, non-shaming approach, easy enough for even the least zen people
• Why speaking fluent gratitude out loud can improve moods, yours and everyone around you
• Insights from James Clear about making tiny habits easy, enjoyable, rewarding, and obvious
• The secret to creating a ritual you will actually repeat instead of ditching it after two days

If you want a gratitude practice you will really stick with, instead of another abandoned notebook, this episode gives you permission to keep it simple, make it your own, and go easy on yourself.

This mini “How Do I…” episode is perfect for anyone curious about neuroscience, tired of hearing about gratitude journals, or ready to enjoy the little things.

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever walked away from a conversation feeling like you just inhaled a face full of secondhand negativity? In this episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine tackle the all-too-common challenge of keeping your own energy bright when the people around you are stuck in a raincloud.

Here’s what you’ll hear:

• Why negativity really is like secondhand smoke (and how to avoid grabbing a “cigarette”)
• The hidden traps of commiseration and why “ain’t it awful?” can pull you into the gloom
• Smart ways to empathize, listen, and validate… without accidentally joining the Negativity Olympics
• Body language hacks to keep your posture upbeat even when the mood is not
• How to “pour sun on the leaves” of someone struggling, and when a smile might not be the right move
• Honesty about the fine line between uplifting and toxic positivity, plus the art of gentle redirection
• Their practical “word tracks” for shifting the convo from what’s wrong to what’s possible
• Why the world will never run out of negatoids, and strategies to protect your boundaries without adding to the salt

If you want to show up as a positive force, but without denying reality or making anyone feel steamrolled, this episode offers validation, sharp advice, and a reminder that you don’t have to “catch” someone else’s gloomy mood.

This mini “How Do I…” episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating family dynamics, workplace drama, or moments when the energy in the room desperately needs a dose of sunshine.

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.