What if being a better sports parent isn't about doing more — but about knowing when to step back?

Brea Schmidt, founder and creator of The Top Bleacher, joins Todd Merkow for a deeply personal conversation about parenting young athletes through the pressure, emotion and chaos of today's youth sports culture.

A lifelong athlete, sports mom of three and mental well-being advocate, Brea shares the family experiences that shaped her approach to sports parenting — including the story of her grandfather "Ducky," who quietly supported her from the top bleacher and became the inspiration behind her platform.

Brea and Todd explore the sports-parent ego, why showing up doesn't always mean being in the stands, allowing kids to experience failure and adversity, and the importance of giving young athletes ownership of their sports journey.

Brea also shares the powerful story of her eight-year-old daughter experiencing intense anxiety while pursuing competitive gymnastics. The family made the difficult decision to step away, seek support and put the child ahead of the athlete. Her daughter eventually chose to return to gymnastics — healthier, happier and better equipped to understand and communicate what she was feeling.

It's a reminder for every sports parent: our kids don't need us to create a perfect sports experience. They need us to be present, intentional and willing to keep the focus where it belongs — on them.

As Brea puts it before walking into a game:

"This is about the kids."

00:25 — Welcome to Be Valiant and meeting Brea Schmidt 06:54 — Growing up as a multi-sport athlete and learning to love the game 09:28 — "Ducky," the top bleacher and the power of simply being there 11:52 — The Thinking Branch and Brea's mental well-being advocacy 16:45 — Raising three young athletes in today's youth sports culture 20:58 — Letting a child decide when it's time to leave a sport 22:32 — The pressure parents feel to show up for everything 26:14 — Why showing up doesn't always mean being in the bleachers 28:12 — Why Brea created The Top Bleacher 32:57 — Recognizing the "sports parent ego" 34:58 — Giving kids ownership of their development and room to fail 40:10 — The emotional well-being of the sports parent 45:16 — The pressure young athletes are being asked to handle 45:52 — Brea's eight-year-old daughter and her struggle with anxiety 48:05 — Listening when a young athlete says the pressure is too much 50:16 — Asking for help and caring for the kid behind the athlete 54:41 — Can youth sports be competitive and still prioritize well-being? 56:45 — Creating more happy moments and fewer harmful ones 57:21 — Brea's advice to every sports parent: "This is about the kids" 58:05 — "Be a Ducky" 59:06 — Rapid Fire: sports-parent habits, self-care and being imperfect 1:00:55 — What does Be Valiant mean to Brea? 1:03:37 — Todd's closing message to sports parents

The Top Bleacher on Social

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Watch the full episode and explore additional resources, takeaways and trusted information for sports parents:

EPISODE PAGE: BREA SCHMIDT

Visit www.PlayFearless.org for free education, conversations and trusted resources designed to help families navigate the youth sports journey and create more happy moments and fewer harmful ones.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society Be Valiant. Play Fearless. www.PlayFearless.org

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

What happens when the sport that has defined your life suddenly ends?

In this powerful Be Valiant Rewind, Todd Merkow sits down with his daughter, Sydney, for one of the most personal conversations ever shared on the podcast. After years of competitive youth soccer, Sydney opens up about the identity loss she experienced when she walked away from the game—and the anxiety, depression, perfectionism, eating disorder, and mental health struggles that followed.

Together, father and daughter reflect on the pressures young athletes face, the warning signs parents often don't recognize, and the long road back to healing. Sydney shares how therapy, writing, self-reflection, and finding new purpose helped her rediscover who she was beyond sports.

This isn't just a conversation about leaving a sport. It's about protecting the well-being of young athletes before, during, and after their playing careers.

If you're a parent, coach, athlete, or someone supporting a young person through youth sports, this is an episode you'll want to hear.

Watch or listen to the full episode and explore additional resources at playfearless.org.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

What does youth soccer look like from the middle of the field?

In this Be Valiant Rewind, Todd Merkow revisits his conversation with Joel Votaw, Arizona Soccer Association State Referee Administrator, veteran referee and sports parent of three, for a perspective every youth sports parent should hear.

In Arizona, nearly half of registered soccer referees are 17 or younger — many just 13, 14 or 15 years old. Yet these young officials regularly find themselves on the receiving end of criticism and verbal abuse from adults on the sidelines.

Joel explains what referees actually hear during games, why those comments can stay with them long after the final whistle, and how sideline behavior contributes to a referee pipeline that loses roughly 40% of its officials each year. He also draws an important distinction between the emotion and passion that belong in sports and the sustained personal attacks that cross the line.

The conversation goes beyond officiating, exploring Joel's own experiences as a sports parent, the pressure of tryouts and the college soccer pathway, the need for more female referees, and the powerful role coaches and parents play in setting the culture around a game.

His challenge to parents is remarkably simple: Imagine the referee's parent is sitting right next to you. Would you still say it?

A timely Be Valiant Rewind about perspective, respect and remembering that many of the people wearing the referee jersey are kids, too.

Explore Joel's full episode, key takeaways, and more free resources for sports parents from Valiant Sports Society at PlayFearless.org: https://www.playfearless.org/episodes/joel-votaw-the-view-from-the-middle-of-the-field

Be Valiant. Play Fearless

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

Valiant Sports Society Sports Parent Resource Site

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

Dr Erik Dean Episode Page

In this Be Valiant Rewind, Todd Merkow revisits his conversation with Dr. Erik Dean, Medical Director for Sports Medicine at HonorHealth, former Division I football player at the University of Arizona, longtime team physician, youth sports coach, and sports parent.

After more than 25 years treating athletes, Dr. Dean has watched youth sports change dramatically—and not always for the better. He explains why early specialization, year-round training, overuse, and the pressure to constantly do more are contributing to injuries at younger ages.

Todd and Dr. Dean discuss growth plate injuries, the increasing prevalence of ACL injuries among young female athletes, the physical demands and often-underestimated injury risks of cheerleading, and why fatigue and growth spurts can create a dangerous combination for developing bodies.

They also tackle one of the biggest misconceptions in youth sports: that specializing earlier and training more gives an athlete a better chance of reaching the next level. Dr. Dean offers a very different perspective from his experience working with high school, collegiate, and professional athletes. Multi-sport athletes are still being sought out—and talented athletes don't need to spend every weekend at another tournament, camp, or showcase to be found.

His advice to sports parents is remarkably simple: let kids play multiple sports for as long as possible, give their bodies real time off, pay attention when something hurts, and make sure they're still having fun.

Because even professional athletes have an offseason. Our kids should, too.

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

www.PlayFearless.org

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

This week on Be Valiant Rewind, we revisit our conversation with former Arizona State and professional baseball player Andrew Beinbrink, founder and CEO of SportsForce.

Andrew brings a unique perspective to youth sports—as a former multi-sport athlete who reached the highest levels of college and professional baseball, and now as someone who works directly with athletes and families navigating the increasingly complicated college recruiting landscape.

But this conversation goes well beyond recruiting.

Andrew shares why playing multiple sports helped shape the athlete he became, what happened when he finally asked his own father to step back, and why parents need to create enough space for their athletes to find their own voice.

We also dig into some of the biggest challenges facing families today: early specialization, overcoaching, chasing exposure too soon, the impact of the transfer portal, and the pressure to pursue a school's brand instead of finding the right fit.

Among Andrew's most important reminders:

"Failure is an ingredient in development."

And as parents navigate all the pressure surrounding youth sports, don't lose sight of what kids themselves value most: fun, friends, and feedback.

Most importantly, Andrew closes with a deeply personal reminder for every sports parent: the days of watching your child put on a jersey are fleeting. Savor them.

In this episode:

• Why multi-sport participation matters

• Giving athletes the space to develop independence

• Why failure is an essential part of growth

• The dangers of overcoaching

• Why development should come before exposure

• How the transfer portal is changing college recruiting

• Finding the right college fit instead of chasing the biggest name

• Why parents should savor the experience while it lasts

Go deeper with this episode: Visit Andrew's episode page at PlayFearless.org for key takeaways, memorable quotes, and additional insights from the conversation—all in one place:

https://playfearless.org/episodes/andrew-beinbrink-failure-is-an-ingredient

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

www.PlayFearless.org

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

Be Valiant Rewind | When the Dream Unexpectedly Changes (Part 3) – The Athlete's Perspective with Will Proctor

In this special Be Valiant Rewind, we're revisiting the powerful conclusion of our three-part conversation with the Proctor family.

After hearing from sports dad Jeff Proctor and sports mom Lisa Proctor, the final chapter belongs to the athlete himself.

Former Division I baseball player Will Proctor shares his remarkable journey from one of the nation's top high school prospects to the emotional realities of performance anxiety, career-ending injury, identity loss, and ultimately discovering a new purpose beyond the game.

Will speaks candidly about the pressure he placed on himself, what it felt like to watch his lifelong dream unexpectedly change, and how he found healing by embracing a new path as a filmmaker. His story is a powerful reminder that our worth is never defined by the sport we play—and that sometimes life's greatest setbacks become our greatest opportunities.

If you haven't heard the beginning of this family's story, start with Part 1: "Be There for the Journey" with Jeff Proctor, available here: https://playfearless.org/episodes/jeff-proctor-be-there-for-the-journey

This episode is just the beginning. Visit PlayFearless.org to explore even more free resources created specifically for sports parents, including:

• Full Be Valiant podcast episodes and video interviews • Expert articles and trusted youth sports organizations • Curated YouTube playlists for sports parents • Guest information and additional educational resources designed to help families create healthier youth sports experiences

Because better-informed sports parents create healthier outcomes for young athletes.

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

Be Valiant Rewind | When the Dream Unexpectedly Changes (Part 2) – A Mother's Perspective with Lisa Proctor

In this special Be Valiant Rewind, we're revisiting Part 2 of our powerful three-part series with the Proctor family.

After hearing from sports dad Jeff Proctor, this conversation shifts to the perspective only a mother can provide.

Lisa Proctor shares the emotional journey of raising a son whose dream of playing Major League Baseball seemed within reach—until unexpected challenges, mounting pressure, and ultimately injury changed the course of his life. She reflects on the highs of watching Will become one of the nation's top baseball prospects, the heartbreak of seeing him struggle, and the unwavering role parents play when their child's identity becomes intertwined with their sport.

This is an honest conversation about resilience, unconditional support, and the importance of loving your child for who they are—not what they achieve.

If you haven't listened to the beginning of the story, start with Part 1: "Be There for the Journey" with Jeff Proctor, available here: https://playfearless.org/episodes/jeff-proctor-be-there-for-the-journey

Then continue with Part 3, where former Division I baseball player Will Proctor shares the athlete's perspective on performance anxiety, identity, injury, and finding purpose beyond the game.

This episode is just the beginning. Visit PlayFearless.org for free resources created specifically for sports parents, including:

• Full Be Valiant podcast episodes and video interviews
• Expert articles and trusted youth sports organizations
• Curated YouTube playlists for sports parents
• Guest information and additional educational resources to help families create healthier youth sports experiences

Because better-informed sports parents create healthier outcomes for young athletes.

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

Some conversations deserve a second listen.

In this Be Valiant Rewind, Todd Merkow revisits one of the most honest and relatable conversations about youth sports parenting with longtime sports broadcaster and father of three daughters, Barry Buetel.

Despite a career spent around professional sports, Barry admits he was completely unprepared for the emotional reality of becoming a youth sports parent. Together, Todd and Barry reflect on the pressure, the sidelines, the coaches, the recruiting process, and the mistakes they made along the way.

More importantly, they discuss what they wish they had understood from the very beginning.

Whether your child is just starting youth sports or your family is deep in the club sports journey, this episode is filled with practical perspective on what truly matters—and what simply doesn't.

In this episode you'll hear:

• Why even experienced sports professionals can be blindsided by youth sports parenting.
• How parents can unintentionally become part of the pressure.
• Why development and relationships matter more than wins and scholarships.
• The importance of choosing the right coach and the right environment.
• Why Barry believes the greatest gift youth sports gave his family wasn't trophies—it was time together.

If you've ever questioned your decisions as a sports parent, this conversation will remind you that you're not alone—and that it's never too late to refocus on what matters most.

Because years from now, your children won't remember every score. They'll remember how you made them feel.

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

www.PlayFearless.org

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.

In this Be Valiant Rewind episode, Todd revisits his conversation with longtime friend and Arizona high school sports voice Kevin McCabe, known by many as the "Dean of Arizona High School Sports."

With more than 40 years covering athletes, coaches, schools, and communities across the state, Kevin brings a rare perspective as both a broadcaster and a sports dad. He and Todd discuss the changing landscape of youth and high school sports, the pressure created by club sports, recruiting expectations, parent behavior, specialization, coaching dynamics, and the emotional realities families face along the way.

Kevin also shares lessons from raising his own five children through sports, including the importance of communication, letting kids define their own journey, and remembering that the goal is not just scholarships or championships, but growth, joy, confidence, and life experience.

This conversation is a reminder for sports parents to stay positive, keep perspective, trust their gut, and help lift up the young athletes around them.

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

Host: Todd Merkow - CEO & Founder, Valiant Sports Society

Powered by Valiant Sports Society

Be Valiant. Play Fearless.

www.PlayFearless.org

Valiant Sports Society is a non-profit organization as described in section 501(c)(3) of the IRC.

Disclaimer: This podcast is for informational and educational purposes only and is not medical or mental health advice. Always consult a qualified professional for guidance related to your or your child's health. Never delay seeking help because of something you heard on this show.

© 2026 Valiant Sports Society. All rights reserved.