What if the most radical thing you could do right now — given everything happening in the world — is fill your body with pleasure first, before the work, before the fixing, before you've earned the right to feel good?

Kait talks with violinist, pleasure activist and embodiment guide Meena Bhasin about why pleasure belongs before productivity, not after it — and what it means to move grief, rage and desire through the body instead of managing it from a distance. They trace the difference between performing for an audience and giving your soul to one, and follow an unexpected thread: the world isn't short on protest, it's short on mother.

Meena treats pleasure as biology, not indulgence — oxytocin, serotonin, dopamine, a body built to receive. She draws sacred rage (the no) and Eros (the yes) as the same fire moving in two directions. A violinist since four who reclaimed music from classical training, and a mother running a solo sex practice she treats as non-negotiable, Meena speaks from daily practice, not theory.

About Meena Bhasin
Meena Bhasin is a violinist, pleasure activist and embodiment guide working at the intersection of music, movement and erotic self-knowledge. She's the creator of a music-and-movement embodiment practice, runs the community Revolution Calls, and is a mother of two.

Key Takeaways

• Pleasure isn't earned after the work — Meena calls it the actual fuel source, backed by oxytocin, serotonin and dopamine.
• You can't be in fight-or-flight and in pleasure at once — making pleasure a real regulation tool, not an escape.
• Sacred rage and Eros are the same fire in two directions: rage protects what we love, Eros creates it.
• The world's violence points less to a lack of protest than to a deficit of mother energy across systems and leadership.
• You don't need to be "sorted" to start a pleasure practice — you only need 1%, and Eros meets you there.

Memorable Quote
"Pleasure before productivity — let's source our energy from this incredible, abundant, endless, free source that lives within our bodies."

Connect with Meena Bhasin

• Instagram: @sensualreveler
• Website: meenabhasin.com
• Substack: https://meenabhasin.substack.com/
• Pleasure in Power Workshop & Revolution Calls

Connect with Kait + PhenXX

• Kait on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza
• PhenXX: phenxx.com
• PhenXX IG: @lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame IG: @becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: @lovephenxx

Sponsored by PhenXX.com — code "podcast" for 10% off your first purchase.

A raw and deeply honest conversation on betrayal, repair, and the slow work of rebuilding a relationship after rupture. Kait sits with Joanna Kristensen to explore what happens when infidelity collides with early motherhood, grief, and disconnection. This episode moves beyond blame into responsibility, beyond collapse into conscious reconstruction. Together they unpack the emotional reality of betrayal, the phases of healing, and what it truly takes to create a new relationship from the ashes of the old.

Joanna Kristensen is a relationship and sex coach specialising in helping long-term couples repair disconnection, rebuild intimacy, and reignite desire. Drawing from both professional training and lived experience, she supports couples through challenges such as infidelity, mismatched libido, and major life transitions.

• Betrayal is rarely just about sex. It often reflects disconnection and parallel lives forming within a relationship
• Healing moves through phases: crisis, integration, and eventual reconnection
• Repair requires choosing whether to stay or leave, then acting in alignment with that decision
• Radical honesty and self-responsibility are essential, without collapsing into self-blame
• Monogamy must be defined explicitly. Assumptions are where many ruptures begin

“I didn’t forget what happened, but I chose how I wanted to shape what came next.”

• Joanna Kristensen Coaching: https://joannakristensen.com
• @kristensenjoanna

• Kait on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza/
• PhenXX: https://www.phenxx.com
• PhenXX on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lovephenxx

Sponsored by PhenXX.com — use promo code "podcast" for 10% off your first purchase.

Mihaela Rusu was raised by a father who preached God from the pulpit and did the opposite behind closed doors. What she built out of that isn't a healing journey — it's a method she calls quantum coding, and this conversation goes straight into how she uses it.

Mihaela is the creator of quantum coding, a subconscious reprogramming method that pairs theta brainwave states with sacred geometry to strip out beliefs a woman never chose and was never asked if she wanted. Born in Moldova, raised in Romania, she talks openly about complex PTSD, the twin sister she didn't speak to for sixteen years about what they'd both survived, and the modelling contract in Milan that became her exit. She also tells the story behind quantum coding itself — a dream that handed it to her whole, a red book, sacred geometry spinning on every page — and what it actually looks like inside a session.

This one moves. Identity as something you were dressed in before you had a say. Certainty as a practice, not a feeling. And what happens to your bank account, your relationships and your body once you stop negotiating with beliefs that were never yours.

What you'll learn:

• Why Mihaela rejects the word "healed" and what she uses instead
• How theta brainwaves and sacred geometry combine inside a quantum coding session
• The story behind quantum coding's origin — a dream, a red book, and 2024
• Why she confronted her biological father on the steps of a church, and what he said back
• The difference between wanting an identity and claiming it
• What her clients uncover about money, safety and worth once the surface beliefs are gone

About Mihaela Rusu:

Subconscious reprogramming mentor and creator of quantum coding. Find her on Instagram @mihaelarusu.official or DM her directly to enquire about her two-week and three-month reprogramming programs.
https://www.inmegoddess.com

Find us: @becomingflame.pod. If something in this is pulling at you, DM Kait FLAME on Instagram for the Becoming Flame Transmissions — a free private podcast series. Becoming Flame: Where Sensuality, Sovereignty, and Sacred Power Ignite. New episodes every Friday, 7am AEST.

#BecomingFlame #QuantumCoding #SubconsciousReprogramming #IdentityWork #ThetaHealing #SacredGeometry #NervousSystemSafety #WomensPodcast

In this episode, Kait speaks with Jade Atia about the hairdressing chair as a site of transformation — and what it cost her to discover that.

Jade is the founder of Shekinah Temple, Crown Alchemy and Neshima Wellness Collective in Brisbane. She has spent over twenty-five years as a hairdresser, but it wasn't until her body forced the issue — a nervous breakdown two days after finishing a five-renovation, two-and-a-half-year build of her wellness space, with a one-year-old in her arms — that the real shift began. She calls that collapse her initiation. What followed was training with the Temple of KA Sacred Feminine Mystery School in Greece, and a full redefinition of what happens in her chair: not a haircut, but ceremony.

This conversation moves between two rooms. In one, Jade unpacks a hairdressing industry she says is burnt out — fast-paced, outcome-obsessed, built on a perfectionism that leaves practitioners unable to sustain the work and clients unaware there was ever another way to receive it. In the other, she traces the death of her mother — from an aneurysm Jade reads as the physical expression of a lifetime spent suppressing her own feminine nature — and what it meant to feel nine generations of suppression in her female line come to an end inside her own body, later confirmed on a retreat in Greece.

In this episode you'll hear:
— What happened in the two days between finishing her build and her nervous breakdown, and why she calls it an initiation rather than a collapse.
— Why Jade believes her mother's death completed a nine-generation pattern of suppression, and how that completion landed in her own body.
— The specific ways the hairdressing industry keeps practitioners and clients from what Jade sees as sacred: presence, ceremony, and time.
— What it means to treat a haircut as a rite of passage, and why ancient communities already understood this.
— How Jade rebuilt her business and her nervous system around ritual, and what she now teaches through Crown Alchemy, her hairdresser training.

Connect with Jade:
Instagram: @shekinah._.temple ·
Website: shekinahtemple.com
Crown Alchemy — a six-week online training for hairdressers, opens Wednesday 14 October 2026: shekinahtemple.com/crown-alchemy
One-on-one sessions and Kundalini Activation ceremonies, Brisbane or online — book via her website.

Connect with Kait + PhenXX

• Kait on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza
• PhenXX: phenxx.com
• PhenXX IG: @lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame IG: @becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: @lovephenxx
  If something in this is pulling at you, DM Kait FLAME on Instagram for the Becoming Flame Transmissions — a free private podcast series.

Becoming Flame: Where Sensuality, Sovereignty, and Sacred Power Ignite. New episodes every Friday, 7am AEST.

What happens when a woman stops performing for the world and starts moving from her own truth?

In this episode, Kait sits down with Hannah Wang, also known on stage as Cha Cha Bang, for a rich conversation on burlesque, embodiment, erotic power, trauma, and the slow, often hidden process of becoming. Together, they explore performance as permission, the body as a portal, and the way women reclaim aliveness when they stop apologising for their sensuality. This is a conversation about Eros not as performance for others, but as life force, truth, and the courage to be fully seen.

Hannah Wang is a dancer, performer, and the founder of Wild Women. Performing as Cha Cha Bang, she creates burlesque-led experiences that weave sensual movement, embodiment, and transformation, and leads nine-week containers designed to help women reconnect with expression, pleasure, and confidence. 

• Burlesque can become a portal into parts of yourself that everyday life has taught you to hide.
• Healing does not always look productive. Sometimes it looks like collapse, rest, and letting the old life fall away.
• Sensuality is not separate from power. For many women, reclaiming the erotic is part of reclaiming self-trust.
• Slowing down changes everything. In performance and in life, presence can hold more power than speed.
• Community matters. Women often remember themselves more deeply when they are witnessed by other women.

“I allow myself to be seen.”

• Wild Women: wildwomen.army
• Wild Women on Instagram: @wildwomen.army
• Wild Women on YouTube: @WildWomenTV
• Cha Cha Bang on Instagram: @chacha.burlesque 

• Kait on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza/
• PhenXX: https://www.phenxx.com
• PhenXX on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lovephenxx

Sponsored by PhenXX.com — use promo code "podcast" for 10% off your first purchase.

In this episode, Kait speaks with Alex Harvey about the word she chose over "acceptable" — and why almost every woman building something real is quietly fighting the same unconscious rulebook.

Alex is a feminine business coach, host of the podcast Money Sex Business & Awakening, and author of Be Unacceptable: Dare to Live the Life You're Meant For. Her path there wasn't smooth or immediate — for a full year after starting her coaching business, she couldn't bring herself to post online at all. It took a workshop with real money on the line to break the freeze. What followed was years of stopping and starting again, until she stopped measuring herself by what landed and started asking one question instead: who am I actually here to serve?

That question became the spine of her book, and of this conversation. Alex and Kait trace what "unacceptable" actually means — not chaos, not shouting from the ceiling, but the specific, personal list of things your nervous system has quietly decided are not allowed: taking up space, naming a desire, believing something that can't be proven. They get into what Alex calls the difference between ambition and highest service, why she rejects "motherhood is the hardest job in the world" outright, and how she became a single mother by escaping violence and moving through homelessness — and found, unexpectedly, one of the most alive and erotic periods of her life on the other side of it.

In this episode you'll hear:
— Why Alex spent a full year unable to post online, and what finally broke the freeze
— The real difference between being unacceptable and being unreasonable — and why one of her mentors called the second one a mandate to change entire systems, not just build companies
— Why she insists motherhood is a highest calling, not the hardest job — and what changed when she stopped treating it as martyrdom
— How escaping a violent relationship and homelessness became the doorway into service, not the end of her story
— Her practice of devouring fear — an embodied, almost gluttonous way of processing what would otherwise keep her small
— The line she closes on: your life changes at the speed of choice

Connect with Alex Harvey:

• Alex Harvey | Feminine Business Coach (@alexh.co) Instagram
• Be Unacceptable: Dare to live the life you're meant for (Amazon)
• Money Sex Business & Awakening with Alex Harvey (Apple Podcasts)
  Referenced Vulnerability Episode
  The Modern Woman Academy

What becomes possible when we stop pathologising ourselves and start listening more deeply to the body?

In this episode, Kait sits down with psychologist and psychosexual therapist Lia Lawton for a wide-ranging conversation on trauma, neurodivergence, shame, pleasure, intimacy, and what it takes to feel safe enough to be fully yourself. Together, they explore why so many people learn to survive through numbness, why vulnerability can feel dangerous, and how healing often begins with small moments of safety, self-trust, and embodied truth. This is a thoughtful, honest conversation about reclaiming pleasure, softening shame, and learning to live with more authenticity and less self-abandonment.

Lia Lawton is a psychologist and clinically registered psychosexual therapist based in Tasmania. She is the founder of Find Sanctuary and works with individuals and couples across trauma, relationships, sexuality, ADHD, and emotional wellbeing, with a warm, person-centred and non-judgemental approach.

• Trauma can teach us to sit in chaos, while calm and safety can feel unfamiliar.
• Shame is often inherited from family, school, and culture, not born within us.
• Pleasure is not frivolous. It can be a pathway back to the body, truth, and self-connection.
• Healing does not always feel dramatic. Sometimes it looks like meeting an old trigger and noticing there is no charge there anymore.

“How do I actually open myself up enough to feel pleasure?”

• Website: https://findsanctuary.com.au
• Find Sanctuary on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/findsanctuary
• Find Sanctuary Therapy on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/findsantuarytherapy/
• Lia on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/masterofsex_ology/ (Find Sanctuary)

• Kait on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza/
• PhenXX: https://www.phenxx.com
• PhenXX on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lovephenxx

Sponsored by PhenXX.com — use promo code "podcast" for 10% off your first purchase.

Content note: this episode touches on childhood religious trauma, suicidal ideation and sexual assault, discussed candidly by Layla as part of her own story. Please listen with care.

In this episode, Kait speaks with Layla Morelock about the theory that your body was never the site of your wounds — it's the library that holds everything you've lived, inherited and survived. Layla is an embodiment educator and the creator of the tri-body self: the 2-D Mind (story, identity, ego), the 3-D Body (physical, real-time, present), and the 4-D original Spirit (the signature underneath both). Her claim cuts against most embodiment work from the start — the body doesn't store your unprocessed emotion, the mind does. The body is only ever the real-time conduit reading it out loud. She didn't arrive at this in theory. Undiagnosed scoliosis, autoimmune illness and endometriosis so severe a hysterectomy was recommended at twenty-nine forced her out of eight years of competitive bodybuilding and into rebuilding her relationship with her own body from nothing.

In this episode you'll hear:
— The 2-D Mind / 3-D Body / 4-D Spirit framework, and what Layla means by bringing all three into "consensual connection"
— Why she rejects the idea that trauma lives in the body, and what she says is actually happening there instead
— Her physical collapse in her twenties — the scoliosis, the endometriosis, the hysterectomy recommendation — and how she reversed it
— Why shame functions as an addiction, and the specific practice she uses to move disgust, despair and jealousy through the body instead of around it
— The heart as the meeting point of mind and spirit, and why she calls it a portal rather than a metaphor
— Why she believes the pursuit of equality with men may cost women access to a form of power that was never his to begin with
— Why she frames beauty as physical expression, not decoration — and what it costs a woman to keep her own library closed
— How years inside occult and esoteric study led her to a radically physical, unmystical reframe of the Akashic Records

Connect with Layla Morelock:

@layla.morelock. Her annual course and upcoming workshops are announced there. Connect with her via DMs.

Connect with Kait, Phenxx and Becoming Flame:
@becomingflame.pod @the.kait.tregenza @lovephenxx

If something in this is pulling at you, DM Kait FLAME on Instagram for the Becoming Flame Transmissions — a free private podcast series.

This episode is for the woman who has spent years trying to fix her body and still feels split in two. It's for the one who has treated her own body like evidence of what happened to her, rather than the place where all of it is still waiting to be read. And it's for anyone who has confused shame for humility, and forgotten that her longing was never the problem.

In this episode, Kait is joined by Katy Orah for a candid conversation about why so many capable, high-performing women feel numb when it comes to intimacy, pleasure and connection to self. They unpack the mental load, over-functioning, self-abandonment and constant doing that can leave the body switched off. Together, they explore how women can begin returning to sensation, softness and desire through small, practical shifts that build nervous system safety and a deeper relationship with the body.

Katy Orah is a relationships and intimacy coach, international speaker, retreat host and founder of School of Sensuality. Across her work with women and couples, she focuses on intimacy, self-connection, pleasure and relational repair, with a particular interest in supporting high-achievers who feel disconnected from themselves or their relationships.

• High-functioning women often lose access to intimacy because they are living almost entirely in the mind, not the body.
• Pleasure is not a luxury. It is a practice of presence, slowness and learning to feel again.
• Small rituals such as a sensual shower, slower meals and self-touch can help rebuild connection and nervous system safety.
• Intimacy in partnership often begins with self-intimacy and the willingness to choose yourself.
• Receiving can be harder than giving, especially for women conditioned to lead, manage and hold everything together.

“Will you choose yourself?”

• Website: https://www.yourcouplesintimacy.com 
• School of Sensuality: https://www.schoolofsensuality.com 
• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/katy.orah/ 
• Couples Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourcouplesintimacy/ 

• Kait on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/kaitlyntregenza/
• PhenXX: https://www.phenxx.com
• PhenXX on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovephenxx
• Becoming Flame Podcast on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/becomingflame.pod
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@lovephenxx

Sponsored by PhenXX.com — use promo code "podcast" for 10% off your first purchase.

Content note: this episode discusses sexual assault and child abuse in the context of family history and ancestral work. Please listen with care.

What if the ancestor you can't forgive and the ancestor who was never protected are the same bloodline — yours?

In this solo episode, Kait explores what happened when she discovered her family tree holds both sides of an unforgivable act: her great-grandmother, eleven or twelve years old when she gave birth to Kait's grandfather, and the man responsible for it. Not one story. Both. In the same DNA, the same body, hers.

Most ancestral work stops at grief for the victim. Kait goes to the room most people won't enter — the conversation with the violator's soul, and what he had to teach her about consequence, hell, and the exact mechanism by which one bad decision breeds the next. What she found wasn't permission or absolution. It was a harder, stranger truth: that refusing to hold both the harmed and the one who harmed — inside her own lineage, inside herself — is what keeps a woman small. The victim story and the villain story are each, on their own, a cage. Only holding both at once — without collapsing into either — is where she found what she calls her inestimable power.

In this episode:
— The discovery that reopened everything: her great-grandmother, eleven or twelve, and the grandfather born from it
— The conversation with her great-grandfather's soul — his remorse, and what he said hell actually is
— Why "victim hell" and "villain hell" are both spirals, and how staying in either one keeps you circling the same drain
— The line that reframes the whole episode: you are the witch that was burned, and the hunter that burned her
— Why reducing yourself — or your ancestors — to one label is a fracture from the truth of who you are, not a form of clarity
— What changes in the body once you stop performing innocence and start integrating the full, uncomfortable complexity of your own bloodline
— Why this work isn't about fixing anything — it's about refusing to keep denying the parts of you and your lineage you'd rather not claim

This is not a tidy episode. It doesn't resolve into a lesson. It sits inside the contradiction on purpose, because Kait's argument is that the contradiction — held, not solved — is where the power was hiding the whole time.

DM Kait FLAME on Instagram (@becomingflame.pod) for the free private podcast series. If this resonated, or someone in your life needs to hear it, please rate, share and subscribe.

Becoming Flame: Where Sensuality, Sovereignty, and Sacred Power Ignite. New episodes every Friday, 7am AEST.

This episode is for the woman who has done the ancestral work on the side of the wound and stopped there. It's for the one who has built a whole identity out of never being the villain in anyone's story. And it's for anyone who has felt a strength in themselves they couldn't quite name — because it was hiding in the part of their story they'd been refusing to hold.