Behind The Daisies

I have typed and erased several sentences, so I’m simply going for it. This podcast is the most vulnerable I have ever been. This is who I am. I’m giving voice to my dark places because I think there are so many that cannot.

I am really proud of the woman I have become. All of our journeys are riddled with potholes, dark places. The question is – how do you get out? I found my way and I am going to do everything I can to pull you out of yours. You can’t let your pain own you. Not anymore. You need to shed that skin and start being who it created you to be. You will feel naked, but don’t allow yourself to live in your dark. Embrace your power, the power your dark is stealing.

I’m not sure where I’m heading with this. I want to write my book. I would love to do public speaking. I hope I am on the edge of helping more women in becoming free.

This isn’t going to be easy to hear – I hope you listen all the way through. I hope I am giving voice to so many that can’t speak their truths.

Thanks for listening,

Amy Zimmer

So excited to share with you all how “we” all got started. It really is “we” too….all of us. Without the spark that Kevin & I dared to take a chance on – there wouldn’t be Juggling Daisies, or this Podcast….

Kevin & I share something that was meant to be. We are so alike and different at the same time making us the perfect pair.

Please take a listen – I have SO much more to share about “us” in the future.

I did change to writing out my script and reading it because I feel it captures so much more of the feels and memories. Comment and let me know if you agree!

Thanks for being here…and listening

Amy

I’m proud of myself. I don’t think many of us say that often enough so I will write it again. I am REALLY fricken proud of myself and where I am in life. I am finally able to open my Pandora’s box of memories without fear. I have so enjoyed intentionally recalling my early years – and finding that innocents still lives there regardless of what evils took place.

It has taken time and work to get here. I am in a place that I never dreamed possible. I am celebrating my childhood memories in my own way. For the majority of my life all I could focus on was the terrible traumas. Then I avoided it all together. I hated when my family would start to recall various scenarios. I never knew what was going to trigger me into spiraling into a deep depression. Or which was equally worse – they would recall things that I don’t remember at all. I resented my black hole that my mind created to keep me safe. I feel like it swallowed so much, too much, making me believe that I didn’t have anything good to look back on, that it all must have been terrifying.

Now, I leaf through those pages of my book with a smile. I remember now what my hair felt like, silky and squeaky. I remember the waves of Lake Michigan pulling my feet right from under me. I remember Dad’s cooking and how hard he tried to make something we all were going to enjoy.

I hope that someday you can crack open your own memories around the time that you went through something traumatic and you are able to see the happy moments too. Don’t let anyone or any event steal that from you.

Thanks for being here and for listening…

Amy Zimmer

Seeing that I am telling you my story, I need to set the scene a bit.

As a trauma survivor it can be terrifying to do a deep dive into your past memories. There are some dark pitfalls that are very easy to fall into and bring you instantly to a ugly place. As someone that has done the hard work of creating internal boundaries, it is safe to look back. I packed up the yuck and keep it in a separate mental filing box. It does not get to hang out with the rest of my delightful memories.

To be very clear, I do not ignore those experiences. They are clear and present. However, there are beautiful things in my childhood too. Things I want to remember. Happiness that I won’t allow to be stolen. I won’t allow bad moments to tarnish my rainbows.

As a child I often felt unsafe. My experiences shaped me into who I am today. I grew and stretched and as an adult I can now protect that little girl and allow her to remember the good and the bad. I had to work on becoming a healthy strong women and go back and rescue the child that nobody else did. You know what – it feels great.

I know someday, with hard work and therapy, you too can create a safe haven for your inner child. Be brave and peek into your past. Look through your own kaleidoscope of happy childhood memories, without dwelling on anything negative.

Thank you for listening…

Amy Z

Digging a little deeper – here is episode 2 – Where did the name for the farm Juggling Daisies come from?

I know I have shared that I see a set of dancing daisies every year that grows out of a rock wall….but the full truth is a bit deeper than that.

Have you ever heard of a circle story? Where you start in one place and you end up back in the same place – yet this time it’s slightly different…

It feels SO GOOD to share this with you all. Thanks for listening…Please subscribe to Spotifiy, Apple Podcasts, or Google. Leave a comment here, or a review on any of these other places….or do it all! I want to share with as many people I possibly can.

You are amazing…

Amy Zimmer

 

Hello Everyone!!!

I am very excited to share my story with you all. This podcast is going to be me, at my most vulnerable. I want to inspire you. I want you to know that whatever you are going through – I believe in you. I want to set the example that you can make it through whatever the world is tossing at you right now. You are growing, learning, and becoming exactly who you were meant to be.

I hope you enjoy it…

Amy