“If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom.” (James 3:13 NLT)

“People have a lot to say about lives they’ve never lived.”

“Unless your name is Google, stop acting like you know everything.”

“Those who think they know it all have no way of finding out they don’t.”

“Since you know it all, you should also know when to shut up.”

These quotes could serve as commentary on James 3:13. Let’s be clear: It’s no small accomplishment to be wise and understand God’s ways. You can only do that by studying God’s Word, staying close to Him through prayer and meditation, and learning through experience what it means to honor Him and seek His will in everything you do.

Gaining wisdom and understanding God’s ways is a lifelong pursuit. And it’s natural to want to pass on what you’ve learned to others—especially to your family, the people whose lives are intertwined with yours. But you need to realize that acquiring the knowledge and experience that results in wisdom is only the first step. Knowing how and when to share your wisdom is the second—and often the most challenging—step.

That’s the point James is making. Wisdom is known by its actions. If you claim to have wisdom, and you know Scripture, show it by living a godly life—and doing it with humility. Humility is what keeps you from coming off as a know-it-all. It’s what keeps you from pontificating on all that you’ve learned while your family members roll their eyes. This can be especially challenging for older folks, because we’ve lived long lives, we love to tell stories, and we love to share what we’ve learned.

The problem is, many young people don’t respond well to “in my day” speeches. Neither do many older people, come to think of it. Those know-it-all quotes went viral for a reason.

So if you’re going to pass on your wisdom, as God wants you to, you must first humble your heart. One way to do that is to listen—to give others your full attention. When you listen, you learn. You learn about people’s communication patterns. You learn about the experiences that have brought them to that point in their lives. You learn about the personal barriers they’ve put up. You learn about the triggers that cause them to shut down. You learn about them. No matter how well you think you know others, even your family, there’s always more to learn.

When you adopt a humble attitude, when you listen, when you put the focus on others, it affects the way you respond. Instead of talking to hear yourself speak or to impress others with your wisdom, you’ll look for ways to make genuine connections between what you’ve experienced and what others are experiencing.

If you ask God to help you keep a spirit of humility, He will help you recognize the right moments to share a life lesson or an insight from Scripture. He will help you connect what you have to offer with what others need to hear.

Reflection Question: Who could benefit from your godly wisdom and experience?

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