My therapist once told me I'm not as difficult as I think I am. That stayed with me. For a long time I wondered if I was expecting too much. Almost guilty for expressing what I want.But I've realized that knowing what you need isn't being difficult. It's being self-aware.Isn't that the whole purpose of adulthood? To keep discovering more about ourselves, what works for us and what doesn't. Listen to it in my latest episode.

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I recently found out I have to leave the house we’ve called home for the past six years.

Since then, every corner of the house has started reminding me of the life we built here.

Plucking lemons from the backyard for my morning tea. Hearing the voices of school kids behind the fence. Waving goodbye to my son as he leaves for school each day.

Endings are never easy. Especially when we have to say goodbye before we’re ready.

Maybe part of life is learning how to end things well.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

None of us is taught how to have difficult conversations, so people do what feels most comfortable to them. We ghost, we get busy, we make excuses. And we move on carrying a little guilt, a little regret, knowing we could've handled things better.

What if incompatibility isn't a failure but just a fact of life?

In my latest episode I discuss why we struggle to tell friends and partners that things aren't working.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

In this episode, I reflect on something I read in How to See Yourself as You Really Are by the Dalai Lama that stayed with me long after I finished reading it.

It made me think about why people struggle to connect with those who have different beliefs, and how understanding another person’s faith or philosophy can sometimes feel threatening to our own identity.

Does learning about other people’s beliefs and respecting them make us any lesser?

If you prefer to read, you can do so here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

I walked onto the stage without my sheet music and had to walk back to get it. Then I played until I finished.

My first violin recital didn’t go the way I expected. So for my second, I was nervous going in. What if I mess up? What if I forget?

I had to coach myself through it. The goal wasn’t to be perfect. It was to keep playing, regardless of what happened in the middle.

This week’s essay and podcast episode are about what it actually feels like to perform when you're terrified of messing up.

If you prefer to read, you can find the essay here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

How we respond under pressure, who we reach for, and how much we rely on others often comes down to how supported we felt as children.

Some people move through the world feeling more secure. Others have to learn to build that over time.

I didn’t fully understand this until one night at the airport, trying to pick up my son. I couldn’t find the gate, and I kept calling my husband. No response.

And then I realized something. I wasn’t calling for directions. I was calling to feel okay.

If you prefer to read, you can find the essay here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

I thought I knew Trevor Noah’s story. I didn’t.

When I read Born a Crime, what stayed with me most wasn’t apartheid or even his survival skills.

It was his mother.

A woman who wasn’t afraid to break rules to give him a better life. She exposed him to books, sent him to better schools, and made sure he knew there was more to life than what he saw around him.

And yet, this fierce, fearless woman couldn’t protect herself.

It made me pause and think about my own son—and whether I’m doing enough to shape the man he’ll become.

This is a reflection on the bond between a mother and a son, and how she shaped him into the man he is.

If you prefer to read, you can find the essay here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

We choose our homes based on schools, safety, and square footage.But we rarely ask: what kind of life can I live here?

In this episode, I share what I learned the hard way.

When I moved from Chicago to California, I lost two sources of community I didn’t even realize I was depending on. The friendships I had built at work and the ones that formed naturally in my neighborhood. Only when I lost both did I realize how much I had relied on these built-in environments for support.

Accidental friendships, the ones that happen because your environment makes them easy, turned out to be key to my happiness. And they don’t happen everywhere.

In this episode, I talk about what I’ve learned about the kind of home and environment that supports the life you want to live.

If you prefer to read instead, you can do so here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

Inside a luxury store in India, I caught myself asking a simple question:Is this who I’m becoming?

I don’t want my growth to be about owning things. I want it to be about unlocking parts of me I haven’t yet discovered.

In this episode, I reflect on that moment and what it revealed about what I’m actually drawn to, and the kind of life I want to grow into.

If you prefer to read instead, you can do so here:

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com

Every Saturday morning, after a full week of creating, I feel completely empty.

This week, I’m making sense of that feeling and why it might be an essential part of the rhythm, not a problem to fix.

If you prefer to read, you can find the full piece here.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit beingyouandfree.substack.com