Beneath the Flowers Podcast

We, humans, are ever-changing by nature.

This isn’t inherently a bad thing. If anything, it just shows that we need an anchor.

Jeremiah 17:5 - 9 paints a picture of two different kinds of hearts.

One that’s tethered to God.

The other is not.

We often reach for verse nine when we’re talking about our emotional state.

“The heart is deceitful above all things and desperately sick; who can understand it?”

But the passage is bigger than a warning about our feelings. It’s speaking about trust.

It begins with the person who trusts in mankind and makes his flesh his strength. Then, just a few verses later, we get the contrast:

“Blessed is the man that trusts in the LORD, whose trust is the LORD.”

One heart is rooted in something outside itself.

The other has made itself the foundation.

Where we place our trust shapes the life that grows from us.

Scripture gives us plenty of stories that show us what happens when our heart begins taking direction from itself:

* Abraham grew impatient with God’s promise

* Samson repeatedly placed his allegiance in what he desired rather than what God instructed

* Adam & Eve trusted their own interpretation of what was good rather than the word God already gave them

The details are different, but the pattern is the same:

When the heart becomes untethered, the life that flows from it reflects that— like a mirror.

Don’t get me wrong, trusting yourself is important. God gave us the ability to make decisions and the wisdom to make good ones.

But there is a subtle difference between trusting yourself and believing yourself to be the final authority.

We change.

But God doesn’t.

Paul says it plainly:

“For we know in part, and we prophesy in part” – 1 Corinthians 13:9

This is a part of being human —having the humility to admit that what I know today is not everything there is to know.

Our vantage point is incomplete.

And as long as we’re wrapped in earth elements, we are looking through a window rather than seeing the whole house.

So how could I trust myself as the foundation of a house I cannot perceive fully?

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We weren’t meant to see everything from where we stand.

We don’t know the end of our story, no matter how hard we try to control it.

And I understand why we try to control it. There’s something comforting about believing we can figure it out. To anticipate every possible outcome and stay three steps ahead of disappointment gives us a sense of safety.

I’ve experienced the strange fruit of an untethered life.

There were seasons where I would rely so heavily on myself that I didn’t allow myself room for error. I was anxious, critical, and overly concerned with getting things ‘right.’ I had a false sense of freedom masking control. I was quick to judge myself for mistakes and judged others even quicker.

I didn’t understand the human experience or the human heart, much less my own. I wanted certainty from a life that could only offer mystery. I believed God was there, I just didn’t know how to trust Him.

I didn’t realize that surrender and self-reliance can’t exist together.

Sometimes we hold onto control because we don’t know what will be left of us when we finally let go. So we stay. Until the weight becomes too heavy or the thing we’re using to keep ourselves safe becomes the thing keeping us from moving.

When I decided to trust God more than I trust myself, I began to experience the fullness of my humanity —not just the beautiful parts.

The fear.

The contradiction.

All of it.

I began to understand why Jeremiah spoke so seriously about the heart.

There is a kind of dependence that diminishes us, then there’s a kind that restores us. The kind that restores us doesn’t ask us to abandon self-awareness, wisdom, or responsibility.

Something powerful happened when I finally tethered my heart to Jesus —I became more honest about how trusting myself in this sea of life, without an anchor, inevitably makes me unprepared for the storm.

Dependence makes room.

I think this is one reason Jesus sent His disciples out two by two. He could have sent them alone. Instead, He gave them one another.

They went without knowing exactly what would happen. This matters because God doesn’t only teach us dependence on Him in our secret place. He also teaches us dependence on Him through people. He gives us opportunities to lean in to the wise counsel, to be supported, and to admit that we don’t have all the answers.

All I’m saying is, trust placed anywhere else but in God is sinking sand. — Matthew 7:24 - 27

You are allowed to make choices, exercise wisdom, dream, wander, create.

However, there’s a difference between being free to wander and having nowhere to return to. And I think, for a long time, I confused the two. Being rooted was never about becoming less free. It was about finally knowing where freedom could safely take me and where I could always return.

Thank you for sitting with me beneath the flowers.

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P.s. the movement of the people in every photo captured in long exposure—there’s a poem there. Imagine if we saw the world in that way... Imagine if we saw people in that way… Who would we trust?

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The Lord has given us exactly what we need for the capacity He's entrusted to us. The measure in which He gives is unique to each person. Above all, have faith.

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I cannot figure out how to get the video to be in landscape orientation while recording from my phone— my apologies for it being sideways. 😩

I had so much fun chatting with you all and answering the questions shared in the chat. I only shared a few of my notes in the video but below I’ve listed more about what I learned about leadership from Moses:

* The camp you were adopted into, doesn’t have to be the camp you standby — especially if there’s corruption.

* When God calls me by name, the only right response is “Here I am” (Burning bush encounter in chapter 3).

* When Moses doubted himself, God reassured him. Moses noticed his own physical ability without noticing his spiritual appointment (where God was calling him) Exo. 4:11.

* God will provide the support I need until I am strong enough to lead and speak on my own — that doesn’t mean he didn’t call me to lead or speak. Exo 4: 13 - 16

* Moses followed God’s specific instructions even when he had doubt.

* God said, “I will be with you. Go. I will tell you what to say.” And Moses went.

* When I notice God, no matter where I am — I worship.

* God speaks through Moses. Moses doesn’t speak on his own will.

* PRAYER builds confidence, provides direction, and secures provision.

* Intercede for the people God has entrusted you with. Pray asking honest questions, real feelings, and like a friend → God said He knew Moses. Exo. 33: 14 -17

* East wind brings, west wind removes.

* Faith comes by hearing the word of God. (also consider Romans 10:17 and the increase in Moses’ faith as He spent time hearing from God).

* Moses took God at His word. All He had was faith & God’s literal word.

* Trust God, not the opposition.

* A little poetic metaphor: yeast (leven) live in culture, reproduces in dough (flesh). Eats at the flesh, causing it (the flesh/dough) to puff up.

* Moses said “take that up with God” (paraphrasing) when the Israelites mumbled and grumbled.

* Give thanks in remembrance of deliverance and breakthrough.

* Repentance restores covenantal bond.

* God is forgiving — although you may have used your influence & rapport to build golden calfs, once you surrender, God doesn’t forget His promises. It is the same anointing, same gift (re: Aaron).

Ultimately, devotion and intimacy with God through prayer is crucial to growth as a leader.

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I hope the little dreamer in you never disappears.

The one who believed that ideas could become realities.

The one who looked at ordinary things and wondered what else they could become.

The one who wasn’t embarrassed to imagine.

To daydream.

To wonder.

Many of us learned that dreaming belonged to childhood while adulthood belonged to practicality. We traded wonder for productivity. Imagination became synonymous with escapism instead of attention. And lately, I’ve been rethinking how I feel about escapism.

Maybe the problem isn’t that we’re longing for another world.

Maybe it’s where we’re looking for it.

Because heaven never stopped speaking the language of our dreams.

We’ve just outsourced imagination to consumption instead of cultivating it as communion.

What if daydreaming was never meant to be something we outgrow?

What if it has always been one of the ways God invites us into partnership with Him?

Jesus is alive, seated at the right hand of the Father, and He is still bringing heaven to earth through willing vessels like you and me.

What an honor it is to be entrusted with that.

To bring glimpses of heaven into the earth.

Through proclamation of the gospel, songwriting, paintings that capture emotions without bounds, architecture, the list goes on.

Everything that has ever been created is from God, for God, for His glory to be known in the earth. Our capacity to imagine is itself a gift from the mind of God. We do not create apart from Him—we create because we bear His image. And that image includes our imagination.

I wonder if we’ve misunderstood what imagination is.

If we’ve handed it over to children, artists, and movie studios, as though its highest purpose is entertainment.

But scripture tells a different story. Before there was ever a temple, there was Bezalel and Oholiab.

Men filled with the Spirit of God. Entrusted with craftsmanship. Entrusted with beauty. Entrusted with building a place where heaven and earth would meet. A place set apart, meant for holy encounter with God.

That says something profound about God.

He didn’t first anoint someone to build an audience.

He anointed someone to build a dwelling place.

He filled them to imagine.

I wonder what that says about the kinds of things heaven calls important.

To envision curtains that had never been woven. Furniture no eye had seen. Imagination was never separate from holiness, it’s one of God’s instruments.

Even more beautiful is that… Bezalel wasn’t expected to create from nothing. God moved on the hearts of ordinary people to willingly bring gold, silver, fabric, wood, and gemstones— from the smallest to largest detail, every resource required for the assignment. They didn’t have to go searching.

God supplied both the vision and the provision.

In 2 Corinthians 10:5 it says we are to cast down imaginations and bring every thought captive to the obedience of Christ. Because the same place God plants the vision, can also become the place where the enemy sows fear, doubt, and distraction.

Which means the answer isn’t to abandon our imagination.

It’s to consecrate it.

The dreamscape isn’t merely biological. Scripture treats it as a place of encounter. It’s a space of exchange, a space of communication between the heavens and man. A place we can (and should) reclaim for God.

Isn’t it interesting that we carefully guard our mornings with devotionals and prayer… but seldom consecrate the third of our lives we spend asleep?

I’m not suggesting we manufacture spiritual experiences, I’m suggesting we become people whose imaginations remain surrendered to God. People whose spirit stay responsive to His voice.

We aren’t only called to wait for heaven, we are invited to participate with it.

It shouldn’t surprise us, then, that God so often meets people in dreams. Throughout Scripture, the dreamscape is anything but silent. While humanity rests, God continues speaking.

Before God changes the world through our hands, He often changes what our imagination believes is possible.

While the world tells us imagination is an escape from reality. I think redeemed imagination helps us pay closer attention to it. Heaven has always spoken through ordinary things to reveal extraordinary truths.

Perhaps imagination isn’t about inventing realities that don’t exist.

Perhaps it’s learning to perceive the deeper reality God has been revealing all along.

So, this goes out to all the little dreamers.

The ones who tucked away journals because adulthood demanded efficiency.

The ones who stopped painting because it wasn’t practical.

The ones who stopped writing because doubt got louder than calling.

The ones who learned to manage life but forgot how to wonder.

Dream again.

We have become incredibly entertained but increasingly unimaginative.

Perhaps the imagination is one of the last places we’ve yet to surrender to God.

Ask: “God, show me what you want me to see.” That’s become one of my favorite prayers. Sometimes He shows me my own heart. Sometimes He shows me someone else’s. Either way, He comes.

Dream because your Father is still creating and wants to create with you — His beloved.

Dream because the Holy Spirit still delights in filling ordinary people with extraordinary ingenuity.

Dream because heaven is still looking for willing hands.

And maybe the next thing God wants to build in the earth won’t begin with louder opinions or bigger stages. But maybe with someone who dares to dream.

Little dreamer,

Imagination is not an escape from reality. It is one of God’s ways of inviting us deeper into it.

If you’d like to support my writing or just say a quick thank you, you can do so✨here✨.

Always love,

Chérie

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I recorded this video on this day last year. It just barely scratches the surface of a very complex scheme of the enemy.

Holy Spirit always meets me on long car rides with a word to share with the people.

Totally forgot about this one. Until now.

Though it feels like light years ago, I really feel like it might bless someone today.

I believe it will set someone free.

Share with a friend.

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*Disclaimer* I am not a bible teacher or pastor, I did not go to seminary or bible college. I’m just a grace gifted woman redeemed from the law being used by God to spread the good news :)

Core message of this live: remember the promise, silence the law

God is sovereign and cannot lie.

Jesus was in the wilderness with the Israelites too.

His promise to Abram, 430 years before the law was given to Moses, is complete in Christ Jesus.

The Law is there to show us that we cannot do life without God. That we are sinners and the weight of our sin is too much to carry on our own. How many laws and rules were there? Yes, life outside of Christ is actually a lot. Full of works. Before Christ, the law was our guardian— God’s plan to keep us blameless/sinless until He sent Jesus.

Jesus Christ calls people "workers of lawlessness" in Matthew 7:21-23, when they rely on their own works (such as performing miracles or preaching) rather than a genuine relationship with Him and obedience to God's will. He declares, "I never knew you; depart from me, you who practice lawlessness"

Lawlessness = no reverence for the law. i.e., sinners.

The law has a purpose in God’s plan.

The work we, born again believers who are grafted into the promise by faith, have to do is believe and remember our identity in the promise.

Sons and daughters of God.

With Christ living on the inside of us, changing our character, desires, outlook on life, we no longer need to be up under the law. We are less inclined to sin. We are made new, and are being made new daily. Yes, both are true. Our soul is no longer ours. It belongs to the Lord. He is our shepherd and the daily bread nourishing us— continually, until the end of the age.

Key verses:

* Genesis 15, when God gave Abram the promise seed

* Exodus 16, focus in on 31 - 35. The test God gave is also the law.

* Galatians 3:15-29 Christ as fulfillment of the promise

* Romans 7 and 8

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God,

I don’t know what to say..

I’ve been having conversations with friends about the current state of the world and what it means for our future generations. In having those conversations, I’ve experienced grief, sadness, anger, hope.

I know it won’t always be this way.

I want to do something. I don’t want to be a sitting duck. So, I write. I read. I create by Your grace. I try my best to remind myself and others to put on love, above all else—to focus on the heart of Christ, so our hearts might begin to look like Yours.

But somehow, I feel like a drop in an ocean of noise.

I don’t question my worth or the impact of the Holy Spirit coursing through my veins. However, I do wonder what it would be like if we, collectively, just paused for a moment—one inhale and one exhale.

To remember the source of the breath in our lungs.To remember the love of Genesis 1.

No, I’m not trying to escape. I see, I hear and can discern the times we’re in.

But what would it be like if we all just took a moment to rememberthat we are to love our brother,our neighbor,our friend?

Love.

Not the fabricated kind, or the kind that thrives in an aesthetic.Love that tells the truth.Love wrapped in compassion.Love that holds both sides accountable.

Love.

Not the cutesy kind—though that has its place too.But the kind that speaks to the outcasts and the ones far away.

Love that sets the table for a Passover meal with a few unhoused friends—stepping into their world for just a moment. Listening. Praying for their journey ahead. Allowing space for humanity and honesty.

So I pray.

I pray that though we may not have a solution,we don’t become the very thing we’re fighting against.

My heart cries, in a way only You could hear.

I feel it before I even understand it—a tightening in my chest.

Like a quiet, internal wringing,with nowhere for the insides of my heart to go.

Pressure builds in my chest,like a volcano waiting to erupt from my eyesas I make my tea.

There, at my kitchen counter—waiting for the kettle to whistle,pouring hot water over these loose leaves.

Feet bound to the cold wood floor beneath me.Spiraling through a future I can feelbut can’t yet see.

I couldn’t hold it back anymore.

With groanings too deep for words.

Not spoken.Still understood.

Without notice, prayers flow from my eyes—running down my cheeks.

Salty enough to preserve the moment.

No need to suppress.You already know what’s in my heart.You knew that volcano would erupt one day soon.

I’d rather stay in this moment than run from it.

Stay hereand let You finish the work You started in my heart.Bring clarity to my mind.

I don’t need words to describe the way my skin tightens when I know You’re here— how, from the weight of Your presence, I must cover my face.

I won’t run away from you, God.

I need You.I lay all of this at Your feet.

You said to remember You are with us until the end of the age.

You left me with that promise.

You are with me.You never left me.

Whether I’m having conversations with friends, heartbroken over headlines, or standing at the counter making tea while tears fall from my eyes—

thank You for this heart of flesh, Lord.

On earth, as it is in heaven.

You heard every word I couldn’t say.

In Jesus’ name,amen.

If this met you in a quiet place,you’re welcome to stay.

I write for those sitting with God, without rushing the moment. Subscribe for more journal entries, poems, reflections, and essays 🌸

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Fully saved… but are we fully covered?

(No, not by grandmama’s prayers…)

Lately, I’ve been thinking about a lot of things.

Thought 1: salvation, a free gift.

Nothing we have to work for—only a heart surrendered.

And yet…what does it meanif there are gaps in the rest of our armor?

In Ephesians 6, we’re told to put on the full armor of God:

The helmet of salvation.The breastplate of righteousness.The sword of the Spirit.Shoes carrying the gospel of peace.The belt girded in truth.The shield of faith.

The helmet of salvation is the first step—vital, but not the only step.

It is the doorwayand the covering.

It guards the mind,the identity,the assurance.

But it is still only one pieceof a full life lived with God.

Not the end of the story.

Some of us have been walking aroundclothed only in the moment we met Him.

Still holding on to the day we said yes,but never stepping into the lifethat yes opened up.

He might be calling you deeper in this season…

Thought 2: are we really ready for war?

Because that is what this is.

A real, invisible, daily battle—and yet, the good news:

Jesus already won.

In Him, we are learning how to standsteady in the authority that is already ours.

The helmet of salvation over your headreminds you who leads you,who you belong to,what has already been secured.

But what about the rest?

The breastplate that forms your heartinto the heart of Christ—steady, aligned, made right with God.

The belt of truth holds the whole suit togetherwhen everything feels like it’s unraveling with lies.

The shoes that carry you forwardinto a life marked by peace—as an example and an experience.

The shield that helps you withstandwhat you didn’t expect.

And the sword of the Spiritthe only weapon we’re given—living, sharp, sustaining.

Salvation is where you begin.But a secured armoris how you persevere.

Maybe the invitation is to finally put onthe rest of what’s already been given.

What would it look liketo walk fully covered this week?

Maybe tonight, you don’t need to try harderjust noticewhat you’ve left unworn.

Thought 3: Manna.

I’ll go live on Substack to talk about this one.so stay tuned. ◡̈

Thank you for sitting with me beneath the flowers. If my work resonates with you or offers support, I’d be grateful for every like, share, or comment. And if you’d like to support my work further or say a quick thank you, here’s the link to buy me a coffee.

I’ll write to you again soon.

Always love,

Chérie

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In dating culture, we know what breadcrumbing means.

It’s the slow drip of attention without intention.Just enough to keep you hoping.Not enough to move forward.

A text that says “thinking of you” but never makes a plan to see you.Warmth without clarity.Presence without commitment.

Breadcrumbing, in relationships, is confusing because it keeps you emotionally invested while withholding direction.

And because many of us have been hurt this way, we’ve learned to associate partial revelation with danger.

So when God leads us in fragments —when He gives only the next step —it can feel eerily similar.

The body keeps the score.The ego tries to protect.And whispers: If I can’t see everything, I’m not safe.

But there can be no ego in the presence of a Holy God.

Because while people breadcrumb to avoid responsibility,the Holy Spirit “breadcrumbs” to build relationship.

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Culture’s Breadcrumbing Creates Anxiety

It says:

Stay interested, but don’t ask for clarity.Keep hoping, but don’t expect movement.Remain available, but don’t require commitment.

It leaves you suspended in uncertainty, carrying the emotional weight alone.

And that weight is not light.

But this is exactly what Jesus was speaking to when He said:

“Come to me, all who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you… For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” (Matthew 11:28–30)

When the Spirit leads in fragments, He never hands you the weight of figuring everything out.He carries it.You are only given the step you have grace to take.

Holy breadcrumbing does not add pressure.

It removes it.

And if you’ve lived through that breadcrumbing pattern — in dating, family, or even church spaces — you may have learned this survival instinct:

If I don’t see the full picture, I’m not safe.

So when God doesn’t tell you the ending,your nervous system can interpret it as abandonment.

But Scripture tells a different story.

Jesus says: “In this world you will have trouble. But take heart — I have overcome the world.” (John 16:33)

Not: figure it all out.Not: optimize your life plan.Not: control every outcome.

Just: Take heart. I have overcome.

This isn’t our story we’re trying to perfect.

It’s God’s story we’re being invited to walk inside.

Holy Spirit Breadcrumbs Differently

He gives:

A persistent nudge.A sentence that repeats at random moments of the day.A knowing that feels both small and weighty.

Think of Abraham.

God didn’t drop the addy.He didn’t send a map pin.He simply said:

“Go to the land I will show you.” (Genesis 12:1)

Not have shown.Not fully explained.

But will show.

In motion.In relationship.In time.

Imagine Abraham—he gets to the plot of grass God told him to go to— dusty, tired, unsure what comes next.

So what does he do?

He builds an altar.

He stops to worship.

Because holy breadcrumbing always includes direction and devotion.

Scripture says:

“Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” (Psalm 119:105)

A lamp, not a floodlight.Just enough light to keep walking without stumbling.Never enough to skip the journey.

Holy breadcrumbing is not about withholding.

It’s about walking together.

Why God Doesn’t Give the Full Map

Because the goal isn’t information.

It’s formation— with every new experience, until our souls ascend to be with the Father again for all of eternity.

If God handed us the entire plan at once, we would strategize instead of trust, manage instead of follow, and rush ahead instead of remaining near.

We live in a culture obsessed with optimization.

Five-year plans.Dating scripts.Efficiency in everything.

But there is a difference between strategy and what my Jamaican elders call ✨reasoning✨.

Reasoning is slow conversation.

It’s sitting somewhere comfortable with someone wise, talking about life without rushing toward a conclusion. You listen closely — not wanting to miss a word — and before you know it, the light has shifted and the day is ending.

Not because you were trying to solve something.

But because you were present together.

This is how the Spirit leads.

Not through frantic analysis.But through ongoing conversation.

Holy breadcrumbing invites us to live this way with God— attentive, unhurried, returning again and again to listen.

The Tenderness of Daily Bread

Let’s be honest.

It’s not always comforting to live this way.

In Exodus 16, God gave Israel manna daily.

Not weekly.Not in bulk.

Daily.

He said:

“Each day the people are to go out and gather enough for that day. I will test them in this to see whether or not they will follow my instructions.”

It was a test of trust—and we know how often they struggled to trust it.

Would they believe He would provide again tomorrow?

Today, we still live on daily bread.

Jesus tells us:

“Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.” (Matthew 6:34)

We have the Holy Spirit supplying our daily bread and instructions.

Still — it can feel vulnerable.

To obey before outcomes are visible.To move without guarantees.To trust when clarity is partial.

Especially if your past taught you uncertainty equals harm.

This is where healing and discernment meet.

Because God’s breadcrumbing does not produce the same fruit as human breadcrumbing.

Human breadcrumbing leaves you:

* anxious

* self-doubting

* overanalyzing

* striving for reassurance

But when the Spirit leads, even in small steps, there is usually a smooth undercurrent:

A steadiness.A groundedness.A sense of being held, even in the unknown.

Not urgency.Not emotional whiplash.

Just enough peace to take the next step.

God Is Not Stringing You Along

He is speaking at the pace of trust.

One step.Then the next.Then the next.

Not to frustrate you.

But to keep you in step with Him.

Because unlike human breadcrumbing, which keeps you attached without direction —

Holy breadcrumbing always moves you somewhere.

Toward growth.Toward freedom.Toward deeper union.

And most of all, toward God Himself.

That way we don’t make idols of the blessings.Or the outcomes.Or even the assignments He leads us into.

We stop — like Abraham — to build holy altars along the way.

To remember Who is leading.To remember Who is carrying the weight.To remember Who the story belongs to.

God doesn’t give the whole map since He never asked you to carry the whole story.

Only to walk it with Him.

Step by step.Day by day.

Not rushed.Not abandoned.

But steadily, intentionally, lovingly led.

One holy breadcrumb at a time. 🥰

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Thank you for sitting with me beneath the flowers. If my work resonates with you or offers support, I’d be grateful for every share, like, or comment. And if you’d like to support my work further, feel free to buy me a coffee.

I’ll write to you again soon,

Always love,

Chérie ~

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If God is love, then our fear of it tells a story worth listening to.

Untangling of love languages and survival love

@heywildflwr on IG

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