BeTempered

At 25 years old, Dan Schmidt was engaged and trying to buy a glass company he barely understood. He knew how to work and was willing to take the risk. Then the bank told him no.

Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr sit down for a closer look at the experiences that shaped Dan, from growing up on a farm in rural Ohio to the coaches, painful losses, and uncomfortable lessons that followed him into adulthood. Dan shares the reality of college football at the University of Dayton, including the grind of camp and the frustration of traveling with the team without getting on the field.

Those lessons carry into business ownership, where showing up means making decisions that affect employees and their families. Dan talks about learning to lead, why “people are the problem and people are the solution,” and how marriage and faith help anchor him when the responsibility gets heavy.

The conversation also gets into COVID uncertainty, health scares, and the discipline reset Dan found through 75 Hard. He shares why discipline is a skill you practice, how small daily decisions compound, and why shortcuts don’t create lasting change.

We also talk about bringing BeTempered into schools, what we’re learning when students open up, and why compassion and resilience deserve attention long before someone reaches a breaking point.

If you’re carrying responsibility, working through rejection, or trying to get yourself back on track, this conversation gives you plenty to think about.

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She kept working. She stayed involved in her community. From the outside, Amy Hicks looked like she was doing fine. In private, she was hiding a meth addiction that stretched across decades.

In BeTempered Episode 128, hosts Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr talk with Amy about the life people saw, the addiction they didn’t, and what happened when she could no longer keep the two separate.

Growing up on a farm in rural Indiana, Amy had a strong church background and a deep desire to belong. She shares how alcohol, cocaine, and eventually meth became part of her story, even as she continued meeting the responsibilities that made her life appear stable. Behind that appearance, addiction was taking a toll on her marriage, parenting, and relationships.

An arrest brought the private struggle into public view. Facing jail and overwhelming shame, Amy entered long-term, faith-based treatment at House of Ruth. There, she began learning how to be honest, accept unconditional love, and build a relationship with Jesus that went deeper than the traditions she had grown up with.

Then came a 10-year prison sentence.

Amy opens up about the doubt, grief, and despair that followed, and the surrender that changed how she approached her time behind bars. Through faith-based programs and a Bible Reading Marathon she organized inside prison, she found opportunities to serve other women, including some who had never opened a Bible.

We also talk about the work that continues after release: serving as a recovery leader, building support groups, pursuing expungement, and setting boundaries so helping others doesn’t become burnout.

This is an honest conversation about hidden addiction, public consequences, faith, and rebuilding a life. For anyone struggling in silence or trying to understand someone who is, Amy’s story offers a reason to keep going.

Subscribe to BeTempered, share this episode with someone who needs hope, and leave a review with the part of Amy’s story that stayed with you.

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One bad decision at 12. Eight rehabs during a marriage. A Christmas night that left children crying in the corner. Sharon Cranfill shares the experiences that shaped her recovery and eventually led her to create a place where other women could begin again.

Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt welcome Sharon, founder and executive director of House of Ruth in Connersville, Indiana, for an honest conversation about addiction, faith, family, and the daily work of rebuilding a life. Through its Christian residential recovery program, House of Ruth helps women pursue sobriety, find stability, and work toward reconnecting with their families.

Sharon opens up about the role faith played in her own sobriety and how that experience shapes the way she leads. Together, they explore how poverty, trauma, and generational addiction affect families, why shame keeps people silent, and what it means to offer love and accountability to someone who may not share your beliefs.

They also get into the structure behind the mission. Sharon explains the program’s 18-month commitment, why residents don’t work at first, and the reasoning behind nine months without a cell phone. She discusses referrals from families, jails, prisons, attorneys, and detox centers, along with how Recovery Works funding can help cover the first three months for eligible residents.

There are stories of second chances, including one woman’s journey through prison toward purpose. There are also difficult conversations about relapse, mental illness, and the heartbreak of caring for someone whose recovery you cannot control. Sharon speaks candidly about both the hope and the limits of helping.

For anyone navigating addiction, loving someone who is struggling, or wondering whether their past has disqualified them from a meaningful future, this conversation offers a reason to keep going.

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Brandon Van Matre thought he had a lingering cough. Then he woke up in the middle of the night spitting up blood. What followed was a diagnosis that changed everything: stage 3 classic Hodgkin lymphoma.

Brandon joins Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt to share his journey from small-town Indiana sports kid to husband, father, and strength and conditioning coach, and what happened when cancer became part of that story. He opens up about the warning signs he brushed off, the mental weight of waiting on biopsies, and the moment he decided he wasn’t going to live in denial.

We talk about going through chemotherapy while continuing to show up for his family and students, the routines that helped him stay grounded, and why “control the controllables” became more than something he said in the weight room. Brandon also shares how community support and prayer helped him through uncertainty, and how faith moved from the background of his life into his daily routine.

During his final 75 days of chemotherapy, Brandon completed 75 Hard. He walks us through his decision to take on the challenge, how he structured the daily commitments, and what he learned about discipline during treatment. With so much outside his control, those routines gave him something concrete to focus on.

This is an honest conversation about cancer, fatherhood, faith, and finding purpose when life changes without warning. It’s also about the people who show up and what it means to let them help.

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“Why don’t they just stop?”

It’s an easy question to ask when you don’t know someone’s story. Mike Horning joins hosts Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt for an honest conversation about childhood trauma, addiction, prison, and the faith that helped him begin rebuilding his life.

Growing up in Connersville, Indiana, Mike experienced abuse, tried to protect his younger siblings, and encountered drugs far too early. He shares how anger, shame, and a chaotic home shaped his decisions, eventually leading to arrests and incarceration. He also explains how prison reinforced some of the behaviors that brought him there, while jail ministry and Bible studies introduced him to the possibility of a different life.

That change didn’t happen all at once. Mike opens up about relapse, concealed opioid use, years on methadone, and the work of rebuilding trust with his wife and being present for his children. His testimony makes room for the setbacks that can get left out when people tell a recovery story.

Through his work with Pathway to Damascus, Mike now helps other men pursue recovery through faith, discipleship, accountability, and practical support. He discusses the importance of addressing mental health and basic health needs, along with his experiences and perspective on medication-assisted treatment, including methadone and Suboxone.

This conversation challenges how we look at people living with addiction and asks what changes when we take time to hear their stories. Mike shares what it has meant to receive another chance and help someone else find theirs.

Learn more about Pathway to Damascus:
https://pwtd.org

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Three children. One rare disease. A mother left asking how she could keep living, and what she could still believe.

Author Holly Jordan Trevillion joins hosts Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt to share the story behind her memoir, This High Mountain. Her son Jamie and daughters Hillary and Hannah were all diagnosed with metachromatic leukodystrophy, known as MLD. Holly takes us from the first signs that something was wrong to the devastating realization that the same disease threatened all three of her children.

She shares the realities of transplant decisions, long hospital stays, complications, and years of care at home. She also talks about the moments no parent can prepare for, including leaving the hospital without your child and trying to imagine a future after losing all three.

Holly is honest about what grief did to her faith, her marriage, and her ability to keep going. She opens up about divorce, using alcohol to numb the pain, thoughts of suicide, and a later abusive relationship. Along the way, she wrestled with anger toward God and the fear that asking hard questions meant she had failed Him.

Through that struggle, Holly describes a changing understanding of faith, moving from legalism and fear toward grace. We talk about lament, unanswered prayers, and what it means to bring God the feelings you think you’re supposed to hide.

Today, Holly is telling her story so others facing grief and despair can feel less alone. Her testimony makes room for the questions, the setbacks, and the slow work of learning to live again.

Find Holly’s memoir, This High Mountain, on Amazon:

https://a.co/d/0eofJWLA

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What happens when you finally talk about something you’ve carried in silence for decades?

Hosts Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt welcome Angie Turner for an honest conversation about teenage pregnancy, abortion, faith, and healing. Angie shares what it was like to become pregnant at 16, feel pressure from those around her, and carry the emotional and spiritual weight of that experience into adulthood.

As a nurse, Angie brings her perspective to informed consent and the importance of having information and support when you’re young and scared. She opens up about her own grief, depression, and shame, and how faith helped her begin working through what she had kept inside for years.

The conversation also explores parenting, talking openly about sex and values, and responding with compassion when your child is afraid. When Angie’s own son became a teenage father, she had an opportunity to offer the understanding and support she knew mattered.

Angie’s story makes room for difficult questions, honest reflection, and the hope of redemption. Ben, Dan, and Angie also discuss pregnancy support resources and how families can find practical help when they don’t know where to turn.

Subscribe to BeTempered, share this with someone who needs encouragement, and leave a review to help others find these conversations.

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Who are you when the uniform comes off and the life you planned falls apart?

Cody Munn spent nearly six years in the United States Air Force. But coming home meant facing questions his military training couldn’t answer. Without the structure, responsibility, and identity he had known, what came next?

Cody joins BeTempered hosts Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt for an honest conversation about military service, depression, grief, and the pressure of high-stakes security work. He opens up about the reality of suicide in the military community and the struggle to find purpose after leaving the service.

Back home in Ohio, rejected job applications and the isolation of COVID made starting over even harder. Cody shares how the GI Bill opened a door to welding, how a new career helped him find direction, and how meeting his wife, Kirsten, gave him someone to build a future with.

His journey toward faith began with questions. Curiosity led him to examine the evidence for Christianity, and simple prayers during car rides became part of a growing relationship with God. Cody walks through what brought him to surrender his life to Christ and take the next step through baptism.

Then came challenges he and Kirsten couldn’t work their way out of. Infertility. Painful conversations in doctors’ offices. A pregnancy they had struggled to imagine. An emergency C-section and a frightening moment in the NICU that brought the uncertainty of parenthood into sharp focus.

Through it all, Cody shares what trusting God looked like when he couldn’t control the outcome. His story makes room for the questions, the setbacks, and the hope that can grow while life is still uncertain.

If you’re starting over, wrestling with your faith, or struggling to see what comes next, this conversation is for you.

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A principal told us something we couldn’t unhear: “These kids don’t have any grit.”

Not as an insult, but as a reality check.

In this episode, Ben Spahr, Dan Schmidt, and Shawn Ruebush break down the BeTempered Standard, a new character-based development program designed to help students build resilience, self-awareness, confidence, discipline, empathy, and real connection.

The program is built around a 10-week series tied to the 10 letters in Be Tempered. Each letter represents a real choice students face, from Broken vs. Belief and Ethics vs. Entitlement to Empathy vs. Exclusion, Purpose vs. Pointless, and Discipline vs. Distraction.

This isn’t a one-time motivational assembly. The workshops are interactive, small-group based, and designed around reflection, real conversation, and challenges students carry with them between sessions.

For the 2026-2027 school year, the pilot program launches at Tri-County North High School in Lewisburg, Ohio, and Preble Shawnee Middle School in Camden, Ohio. The groups intentionally bring together high-performing students and students who may be struggling, creating an environment where different experiences and perspectives can challenge and strengthen one another.

At the high school level, students will ultimately take what they’ve learned and build a leadership-style day featuring breakout sessions and student stories, moving from personal growth into leadership and school culture.

Ben, Dan, and Shawn also explain the creation of the BeTempered Foundation, a 501(c)(3) nonprofit built to support scholarships, the program, and future expansion as they learn from the pilot year.

If you’re an educator, parent, coach, mentor, or simply someone who believes stronger communities start with stronger young people, this episode is for you.

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What does it look like to inherit a four-generation legacy and realize your job isn’t just to preserve it, but to make sure it survives for the next generation?

Steve Hayes Jr., executive director of Hayes Arboretum in Richmond, Indiana, joins Ben Spahr and Dan Schmidt for a conversation about family legacy, conservation, nonprofit leadership, and the responsibility that comes with caring for something much bigger than yourself.

Steve takes us back to the beginning with his great-grandfather, Stanley W. Hayes, a Cornell-trained engineer and prolific railroad industry inventor who began restoring native trees to land that would eventually become Hayes Arboretum. What started as a family estate grew into 466 acres of forest, prairie, wetlands, historic property, and environmental education that generations of people have experienced.

We talk about what makes Hayes Arboretum different, why native plants and ecosystems matter, and why spending time in nature can provide a kind of peace that’s difficult to find anywhere else. Steve explains the quiet work happening in a forest every day and how closely it mirrors the work of building a healthy community.

But preserving a legacy isn't always easy.

Steve opens up about the financial realities of running a nonprofit, the original endowment model, what happened as those resources were depleted, difficult decisions involving land sales, and the work required to change the organization’s trajectory. He shares how disciplined operations, volunteers, mission focus, and long-term planning have helped position Hayes Arboretum for the future.

We also get into the Playscape, future classroom plans, the Arboretum’s master plan, and Steve’s personal approach to leadership. From gratitude to running and physical discipline, he shares some of the practices that help him stay grounded when the responsibility gets heavy.

This is a conversation about trees, but it’s also about stewardship. It’s about taking care of what previous generations built, making difficult decisions when necessary, and leaving something worthwhile for the people who come after us.

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