Big Asian Energy

What do you do when the industry tells you there's no space for you? You build your own.

In this episode, John Wang sits down with Don Michael "Don Mike" Mendoza, Broadway producer, talent manager, entrepreneur, and host of the podcast Producing While Asian, for a conversation about what it really takes to create opportunity when the door hasn't been opened for you yet.

Don Mike shares the one piece of advice that changed his life and career: don't be afraid to ask for what you want. And if you hear no? You're asking the wrong person.

He breaks down how he went from being told he had a limited future on stage to producing Here Lies Love on Broadway: the first Broadway musical with an all-Filipino cast and how the instinct to build was something passed down through his family long before he ever set foot in a theater.

They also get into what it means to be "the only" in the room, why crab mentality is one of the biggest threats to community progress, and how the most powerful thing you can do once you've made it through the door is hold it open for everyone behind you.

In this episode:

• Why asking for what you want is harder for first-gen and immigrant families  and why it's worth unlearning the shame around it
• The Kris Jenner rule Don Mike swears by when he hears no
• How he built LA TI DO from a basement bar underneath a sex shop in Washington D.C. into a national production company
• The phone call on 45th Street that landed him on Broadway — and how it started with befriending a writer named Zach and meeting his first management client, Vincent Rodriguez III
• Why authenticity and research are non-negotiable when you're telling someone else's story
• The real reason Here Lies Love is still relevant today

Connect with Don Mike: 

Instagram: @donmikemendoza 

Company: @dmhmendozaproductions Website: dmhproductions.com 

Podcast: Producing While Asian

Don Michael H. Mendoza, (Don Mike), is the Founder of DMH Mendoza Productions and the Co-Founder and Executive Producer of LA TI DO where through both entities he’s produced on Broadway (Here Lies Love), Off-Broadway (Hazing U), and hundreds of cabarets, concerts, theatrical shows, and events nationally since 2012. Concurrently, he is an international talent manager, and as an independent marketing professional, he served as the first Director of Marketing & Media for the Filipino American Symphony Orchestra in Los Angeles and the Pennsylvania State Chair for Filipino Americans for Harris-Walz. Mendoza is an alumnus of the Commercial Theater Institute in New York City, and holds a B.A. in Musical Theatre & Journalism and an M.A. in Strategic Communication from American University where he sits on the Alumni Association Board. He also sits on the Board of Trustees for Winchester Thurston School, and the Board of Directors for New York Theatre Barn, and The Filipino American Association of Pittsburgh.

As always — when we rise, we rise together.

You worked hard, hit the goal, and then felt nothing. If you've ever reached a milestone you'd been chasing for years only to feel strangely empty on the other side, you're not broken. You're on the Achiever Treadmill, and this episode is going to show you exactly how to step off it.

In this deeply personal episode, John opens up about what happened after publishing his book Big Asian Energy, a childhood dream that landed him on the Wall Street Journal, NBC, and Amazon's Top 20 Business Books of 2025. Despite all of it, he felt lost. He uses that experience to break down the psychology behind "not-enoughness," where it comes from, and how to reclaim your own sense of worth.

The Science of the Achiever Treadmill Psychologists Dr. Philip Brickman and Donald Campbell studied lottery winners, accident survivors, and everyday people and found that within a year, everyone returned to the same baseline happiness level. Your brain is wired to adapt. That promotion, that raise, that dream job title all become the new floor faster than you think. This is hedonic adaptation, and it's why external achievement can never permanently fill an internal gap.

Where "Not-Enoughness" Really Comes From For many Asian Americans, the roots go back to childhood. Dr. Bart Soren's research on "conditional regard" shows how children who only receive affection tied to performance start to believe their worth lives in their output, not in who they are. Add in the model minority myth, and research from Claremont College shows it creates some of the highest rates of imposter syndrome among the highest-performing students.

How to Actually Break the Cycle John shares the two-word piece of advice from a monk friend that changed his entire year, plus two practical tools you can start using today. The first is the "Whose Voice Is This?" practice, where you pause before chasing the next goal and ask whether the desire is genuinely yours or an expectation you inherited from someone else. The second is a Micro Wins Journal, a simple folder on your phone where you log small wins and moments of progress to train your nervous system to recognize that you're already moving forward.

"More pressure doesn't build confidence, it builds more self-doubt."

"No external achievement will ever get you to enough if you don't currently feel like you are enough."

"You can't step off a treadmill you didn't know you were on."

"Enoughness is your birthright."

📖 Big Asian Energy by John Wang, available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and wherever books are sold. Named one of Amazon's Top 20 Best Business Books of 2025.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs to hear it. When we rise, we rise together.

In this episode of Big Asian Energy, host John Wang sits down with resident psychologist, sexuality and relationships expert, and author of Patterns That Remain,  Dr. Stacy Litam, for one of the most honest, charged, and long-overdue conversations in the Asian diaspora space: interracial relationships, and everything society projects onto them.

In this episode, they cover:

• The "Oxford Study" explained — What it actually is, where it came from (a 2023 TikTok comment), and why people keep using it to shame Asian women in interracial relationships
• Is it “Asian fetish” or “Just a preference”?  — How to tell the difference, what red flags actually look like, and whether fetishization can exist in a loving, consensual relationship
• Internalized racism and partner selection — How to identify if someone’s partner selection was influenced by internalized racism 
• The demasculinization of Asian men and hypersexualization of Asian women — How decades of Hollywood representation (or lack thereof) shaped the dating landscape, and how things are shifting
• "You're muddying the bloodline" and "You're colonized" — Unpacking the three most common attacks Asians in interracial relationships receive. 
• How to talk to your family about dating a non-Asian person — A practical framework for navigating parental disapproval, separating "need to haves" from "nice to haves," and addressing fear with compassion
• The "Chinese era" trend — Why cultural appreciation gone corporate is a problem, and the line between appreciation and appropriation

Dr. Stacy Litam is a licensed psychologist and one of the leading voices on Asian American mental health, sexuality, and identity. Find her on Instagram and check out her previous episodes on Big Asian Energy for more.

Show Links

Guest: Dr. Stacey Litam Website: www.staceylitam.com Instagram: @drstaceyalitam

Patterns That Remain: A Guide to Healing for Asian Children of Immigrants Available on Amazon:https://www.amazon.com/Patterns-that-Remain-Children-Immigrants/dp/0197762670

Ever feel a knot in your stomach when a cousin gets into med school, or a coworker lands a big promotion? If you grew up in an Asian household, you may have felt that sense of comparison dread before.  In this episode, John breaks down the fascinating science behind why Asian and Western cultures are wired to respond to success and failure in almost completely opposite ways. 

In this episode, you'll learn:

• Why Japanese students work harder after failure while North Americans work harder after success, based on a landmark 2001 study that reveals how Asian and Western motivational systems are often flipped.
• The difference between the independent vs. interdependent model of self — and how your cultural background shapes what makes you feel valuable at the most fundamental level.
• How social comparison works as a tool of motivation in collectivist cultures, and why "upward comparison" isn't threatening to East Asians, but  informational
• Why perfectionism in Asian cultures is often a survival strategy, not just a personality trait.
• The hidden reason why Western talk therapy and standard mental health advice can actually increase stress for East Asian people.
• How immigrant family dynamics intensify these pressures — and what often gets missed about the genuine benefits of collectivist systems.

Referenced Research:

• Heine & Lehman (2000s) — Japanese vs. Canadian participants on self-assessment bias
• Heine et al. (2001) — Success/failure feedback and task persistence across cultures
• White & Lehman (2005) — Upward comparison preferences after failure in Asian Canadians
• Ko & Kim — Interpersonal vs. intergroup comparison and self-esteem in Asian Americans

Resources Mentioned:

• Quiz: The 7 most common achievement patterns in Asian Americans → bigasianenergy.com

Book: Big Asian Energy by John Wang

Guest: Diana YK Chan, Personal Branding & Authority Strategist, LinkedIn Learning Instructor, 7-time UN Speaker

Episode Overview:

Have you ever talked yourself out of an opportunity before you even tried? In this episode, John sits down with Diana YK Chan, personal branding strategist, LinkedIn top voice, and one of the most practical voices in the space when it comes to visibility and confidence. Diana breaks down why so many talented people stay stuck, undercharge, and undersell themselves and exactly what to do about it.

Whether you're launching a business, gunning for a promotion, or trying to get on bigger stages, this conversation gives you mindset shifts and tactical frameworks you can use immediately.

What You'll Learn in This Episode

• What imposter syndrome actually is and why 70% of people experience it
• Diana's 3-step framework: Identify → Believe → Voice your value
• The difference between speaking from your head vs. your heart — and why it changes everything
• How to "borrow belief" when you don't have enough of your own yet
• Diana's 4 Pillars of Marketability: Positioning, Credibility, Visibility, and Relatability
• The "features tell, benefits sell" rule that will change how you pitch yourself
• Why the biggest mistake new entrepreneurs make is undercharging — and how to fix it
• How to use the "What would NOT have happened if I wasn't there?" question to own your impact
• Why sharing vulnerable stories on LinkedIn led Diana to become a LinkedIn Top Voice

Key Quotes

• "How you see yourself shapes how others see you."
• "Nothing has meaning except the meaning you give it."
• "When you don't believe in yourself yet, borrow that belief."
• "Selling is serving. When you shift that, everything changes."
• "Stop underselling, underrepresenting, and undermining yourself."
• "A no doesn't mean not ever, it just means not right now."
  

Resources & Links

• Connect with Diana on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/dianaykchan
• Diana's LinkedIn Learning Courses: https://www.linkedin.com/learning/instructors/diana-yk-chan
• Diana's company: My Marketability - https://mymarketability.com/

Stephen Lee is the president of the Asian American Bar Association of Greater Chicago.  He was a federal prosecutor for 11 years and was a partner at a law firm, and he now has a solo practice where he primarily defends people who are accused of health care fraud.  Before becoming a lawyer, he was a newspaper reporter, and he still writes in his spare time about topics including Asian American legal history. 

In this episode, Stephen Lee shares his journey from a shy kid to a high-stakes trial lawyer, dismantling the "quiet professional" stereotype along the way. He provides a masterclass in self-advocacy, the importance of building a niche personal brand, and the technical communication skills needed to command a room or a courtroom.

• Be Your Own Best Advocate: As a lawyer, you're trained to fight for your clients, but often forget to fight for yourself. Stephen emphasizes that doing "great work" isn't enough to reach senior levels; you must be intentional and vocal about your career goals.
• The Power of a Niche Brand: In a crowded field, specialization is key. Stephen explains how narrowing his focus to healthcare fraud and data analytics helped him stand out more effectively than being a generalist.
• Strategic Networking: Forget the cocktail parties. Real connections are built through collaborative work, such as organizing panels or volunteering for bar associations.
• Mastering Presence and Communication: Stephen shares the "sprinkler vs. sniper" technique and the importance of pacing and gestures in public speaking, skills he learned through high-stakes trial experience.
• Confidence Through Survival: True confidence isn't born from success, but from surviving rejection and failure.

Stephen Lee is the president of the Asian American Bar Association of Greater Chicago.  He was a federal prosecutor for 11 years and was a partner at a law firm, and he now has a solo practice where he primarily defends people who are accused of health care fraud.  Before becoming a lawyer, he was a newspaper reporter, and he still writes in his spare time about topics including Asian American legal history. 

• AABA Chicago: https://aabaogc.wildapricot.org/ 
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/stephenchahnlee/
• Website: https://www.stephenleelaw.com/
• Asian American legal history written by Stephen: https://ourapaheritage.substack.com/
• The Portrait Project: https://www.apaportraitproject.org/ 

Love this episode? Share it with someone who’s ready to level up their career. And don't forget to grab your copy of Big Asian Energy, now available on Amazon and major bookstores!

In this episode of Big Asian Energy, host John Wang sits down with our amazing resident psychologist Dr. Stacey Litam to jam on what’s in and what’s out for 2026. From how to rewire our brain for joy to oversharing, this new episode uncovers what’s actually working to make a change in your life. 

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drstaceyalitam/

Website: https://www.staceylitam.com/

Amazon book link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0DM8JJTB7?ref=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_F3M9H3XBTA8QD8A2H04M&ref_=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_F3M9H3XBTA8QD8A2H04M&social_share=cm_sw_r_ffobk_cso_cp_apin_dp_F3M9H3XBTA8QD8A2H04M&starsLeft=1&skipTwisterOG=1&bestFormat=true

In this episode, we dive into the "invisible weight" carried by many Asian adults, particularly those from immigrant families who grew up as the "competent ones" everyone turns to. We explore how early role responsibilities, such as translating at the doctor’s office or managing a parent’s emotional state, create a survival strategy that follows us into adulthood.

Our conversation breaks down the concept of adultification, the difference between healthy high performance and anxious over-functioning, and how to move from reactive fixing to responsive choice.

Notable Quotes:

"Adultification happens when the parent-child hierarchy basically flips upside down... the child instead becomes a caregiver to the parent."

"There’s a massive difference between healthy high performance and over-functioning... healthy high performance happens when you choose to excel because you’re genuinely excited. Over-functioning comes out of a sense of compulsion."

"True maturity isn’t actually doing everything for everyone. It’s knowing what is actually yours to carry and allowing other people to do what they’re here to do."

"Being a good child [often] means erasing your needs entirely or hiding them so that you’re not adding more inconvenience and burden to your parents' already heavy plates."

Key Discussion Points:

The Two Types of Adultification: Breaking down "Instrumental Adultification" (logistics and bills) versus the "sneakier" "Emotional Adultification" (becoming a parent’s therapist or marriage counselor).

The Cultural Amplifier: How immigrant survival mode forces children to become cultural interpreters and emotional caretakers before they have a choice.

Hyper-vigilance vs. Emotional Intelligence: Why being "good at reading the room" is often a nervous system adaptation learned to predict emotional outbursts in childhood.

The 10-Second Pause: A practical tool to interrupt the autopilot "fixer" instinct and allow for self-regulation.

Differentiation: Learning to build your own identity and value system while still remaining emotionally connected to your family.

Guest: Dave Lu (Managing Partner of Hyphen Capital. Founder of Expo and Fanpop. Founder of Stand with Asian Americans. Producer of 38 at the Garden. Board of Smithsonian Asian Pacific American Center.)

Host: John Wang

In this episode, John sits down with Dave Lu, a serial entrepreneur, Emmy-winning producer, and the founder and managing partner of Hyphen Capital, one of the top VC funds focused on backing Asian American founders and cross-cultural entrepreneurs. From the viral "Enough" letter in the Wall Street Journal to the nuances of venture capital, Dave is a walking masterclass on how to stop being "invisible" and start being audacious.

In our conversation Dave dives into the "hoop-jumping" mentality that traps many Asian American professionals and explains how to transition from feeling the need to seek validation to building real influence.

Notable Quotes:

"I started from a place where I felt Asians are invisible….But I realized that, we feel like we’re unseen, but oftentimes we don’t even see ourselves. So how can anyone else see us?” — Dave Lu

“I did everything I thought I needed to do to make my parents proud, but also to find validation and self-worth through all the hoops I was jumping through. And I think that chase for self-worth and validation from just doing things and achieving things, it just led to emptiness again and again.” — Dave Lu

“All the rules to gain power are antithetical to how Asians are raised. We’re raised to follow every rule, don’t stick out, don’t break rules, don’t disagree, don’t argue. But one of the rules to gain power is to be self-promotional and build your brand, and we’re never taught to do that.” – Dave Lu

"If you don’t take credit for your work, someone else will. Advocating for yourself is having agency." — Dave Lu

Dave Lu Links:

https://www.davelu.com/

https://www.davelu.com/podcast

https://open.spotify.com/show/7plRO8VeNdoAT5fplNoNP4

https://substack.com/@davelu

https://twitter.com/davelu

https://www.linkedin.com/in/davelu

In this conversation, Sun Yi and John Wang explore the significance of authenticity in personal branding, particularly within the context of Asian American cultural expectations. They discuss the challenges of navigating identity, the importance of vulnerability in storytelling, and how honesty in business can build trust. The dialogue emphasizes the need for individuals to embrace their true selves and share their experiences to foster genuine connections with others. In this conversation, Sun Yi and John Wang explore the intricacies of personal branding and storytelling. They discuss the importance of authenticity, the hero's journey, and how to transform personal trauma into compelling narratives. Sun Yi emphasizes the need to identify one's weaknesses and how they can be reframed as strengths. The discussion also touches on the balance between authenticity and marketing strategy, highlighting the significance of genuine connection with the audience. Sun Yi shares insights on crafting a personal brand that resonates with others while maintaining integrity and depth.