Step into the confessional with Simon Mayo and the crew for another week of confession chaos.

Sister Goldenhair attempts a 10-day silent meditation retreat in Thailand… only to be derailed by a tree frog, a “hot monk”, and an unsanctioned breakout into the countryside that ends with a full-blown Karma Chameleon singalong to some very understanding cows.

Then it’s building-surveyor bedlam as Mike accidentally lets a cat into a house with a “highly strung” parrot on the loose… and makes a bold feather-related decision under pressure.

Plus: Steve’s student-radio brush with The Smiths takes a citrusy turn, and the anonymous agent of East Anglia learns the hard way that mooning colleagues isn’t quite “drawing room manner”.

Got a confession? Send it to [email protected].