Birdhands

Eat your heart out Freddy!

The Friday the 13th can do supernatural too! But they really should not. They would be best off sticking to the basic slasher formula that brought them success in the first place. Because sometimes being different is not the answer.

You can't blame them for trying though.

Well, you can't, but we can and will. So join us as we make Jason Goes to Hell worse than it already is. It won't be easy!

 

Don Dohler is back again on the Birdhands chopping block.

Don's unique brand of aliens and monotone dialogue are out in full force as we view one of his most loved projects.

Seems like the characters are not really written as well as his other movies but the acting makes up for it in this classic indie horror flick.

Don't wait another minute! Fill a goblet, pet a cat, and join us as we fiend on..... Fiend!

Phantom of the Mall - Eric's Revenge!

Sometimes titles can be misleading. But in this case it's fairly accurate. Eric is indeed haunting this mall for some reason and in the process getting revenge on greedy fat cats.

The poster makes it look like a bit more of a horror movie but other than Eric's revolting face, there is not much in the horror department except for some scary fashion choices.

Even the talents of Pauly Shore and a bunch of genre actors cannot save this one. But maybe you can take an escalator down to the depths of the Birdhole and suffer along with us. If you are into that sort of thing. Because I know we are!

This week on Birdhands we continue with our series of social distancing discussions. Weird to talk about anything now as there are really no movies scheduled to be released anytime soon. Most of the big titles are going to be held up until they can fill a theater with people and popcorn.

It would be amazing if they decided to release them to streaming on demand type services. I would pay to see Ghostbusters 3 and Halloween Kills right about now. I think we all are in need of some non reality as a distraction.

But until then we will discuss everything under the sun and try and keep everyone's mind at ease for a bit. Nobody said it was easy, but we will have a crack at it.

Witchboard has a few good things going for it. Tawny Kitaen is one, and cool Ouija board plot lines is the second.

But really that is it with this one. It is way too long for a movie about a game you can buy at Walmart. If they cut out the more boring stuff it may have been more memorable. It did not even scare the half of Birdhands who is terrified of the powers of the Ouija!

But hey, who cares. It has the 1986 version of Tawny Kitaen and that is a glorious site to behold.

Here we go again on our own, with this weeks crapfest! Plug your nose because this is going to be a stinker.

What makes an awesome opening scene?

Some movies just have that perfect sequence that draws the viewer in and sets the pace for what you are about to see. There are obvious contenders like the James Bond movies, but some are so well crafted that they fit into their own category for various reasons. See if you agree with our picks and let us know what you think should and should not be on there as we discuss the greatest opening scenes in film history!

Rock and Roll High School Forever.

Forever is what it seems like watching this abortion of a movie. I say that as a huge fan of the 1979 original. But even that movie I consider it a fluke that it was enjoyable.

Corey Feldman is hard to root for in this movie as his band "The Eradicators" are just awful. When the adults in the movie crap on his music, you can see where they are coming from.

But join us if you will as we grab some pizza in the Birdhole with Mr. McGloob as we watch, Rock and Roll High School Forever!

 

Ghostbusters or Back To The Future? The Terminator or The Goonies?

1984 and 1985 are arguably the greatest years for movies of our generation. So many classics and so many favorites that bring us back to our childhoods. But is it just nostalgia? Or personal preference?

On this episode of Birdhands we try to put our personal biases aside and break down the films of 1984 and 1985 and decide which was the better year for movies.

It won't be easy. But we are up to the task. Come join us as we talk about the greatest films of all time which happened to be released within a short time frame. Place your bets as we decide which year was better, 1984 or 1985!

80's horror movies are probably the most beloved films in the eyes of genre fans. Picking the best out of the whole decade would be a chore.

But since we have nothing but time on our hands these days we figure we will try and sort out the best horror movie from each year in the eighties.

We also discover that Freddy Krueger might be based on Micheal Jackson.

Which films will reign supreme and which will stay at the bottom where they belong?

Join us as we figure it all out for you!

We are still in the era of social distancing and and some bad quality Doctor Beats headphones cannot stifle Doctor Birdhands. Even in a pandemic we are here to discuss all things movies. We go from the most disturbing films we have ever seen to the future of entertainment.

Join us in the Birdhole for this weeks open forum - Pot Pourri!