Birth Matters

Today’s birth story was one that took place back in May in the first couple of months of the pandemic in a Manhattan hospital, and it was recorded mid-June. Alissa initially hired a doula to help her remain calm, but due to the pandemic the hospital wasn’t allowing more than one support person, so she shifted that support to postpartum virtual support. Despite not having doula support for the labor, Alissa is surprised when she finds most of her 8-hour labor so manageable that she questions being in labor at all for much of it. She also explains how surprised she was at how wonderfully everything went and how her fears were unnecessary, and will also share some of the surprising ways the pandemic positively affected her experience. From there, Alissa goes on to share how deeply challenging breastfeeding was for her. When she realized it was having a hugely negative impact on her mental health and hurting her relationship with both her daughter and her husband, she ultimately decides to stop nursing and switch to bottle feeding. She’ll explain how, while it was a very difficult decision, ultimately it was an important and wise one to protect the wellness of their whole family.

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Almost 2 years after her daughter was born, and following a cross-country move closer to family in California, Kirtan shares the details of her firstborn’s birth. She has an unusually quick, 6-hour unmedicated labor and arrives at the hospital just in time to push, similarly to Simone a couple of episodes ago, in Episode 47. Kirtan will then share quite a bit about her struggles with breastfeeding, including experiencing a painful letdown as well as anxiety she experienced surrounding not only breastfeeding but also in introducing solids. As a bonus, you’ll hear about an intentional ritual her husband, Brendan, initiated for both parents to get good chunks of sleep in the early weeks -- one that supported healthy nursing rhythms. Second bonus: an entertaining story on Kirtan pumping on a subway home from work!

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Today’s episode is the first time for this podcast to have one mother on the show to share all three of her babies’ birth stories. As a mom of 3, you’ll see how efficiently Traci shares her stories as this is, ironically, one of our shortest episodes. (We suspect that’s because when you’re a mom of 3 you learn to be as time-efficient as possible!) Traci shares how all 3 of her babies’ births were fairly uncomplicated, vaginal births, the first being in NYC and the 2nd and 3rd in Indianapolis. Traci shares how, while her first two had no nursing issues and were actually avid breastfeeders, her third baby surprised them by having pretty significant feeding issues. They soon discovered that he had a condition called Laryngomalacia, where the tissue of the larynx is softer and floppier than normal. This created the challenges with breastfeeding and, later, some speech issues, both of which required some work with a speech therapist.

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Today, we’re excited to have a local colleague on the show to share her first baby’s birth story. Simone Toomer is a Brooklyn-based Black mother of two as well as a perinatal professional who wears many hats -- she’s a doula, childbirth educator, sleep educator, lactation counselor and soon-to-be lactation consultant. At this point, Simone is mostly focusing on nursing support, serving as a leader for La Leche League International and for Chocolate Milk Cafe, a now-national organization that specifically provides nursing support groups for nursing parents who identify with the African diaspora. In addition to sharing her first baby’s uncomplicated birth story in a hospital in which she shows up pretty much just in time to push and give birth, Simone will also share a bit about the great work she’s doing to improve breastfeeding outcomes for Black families.

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Today, Mila & Shawn share their baby’s pre-pandemic, premature birth story. In the weeks leading up to Mila’s labor, the couple had been chosen to be on the tv show HOUSE HUNTERS. However, Mila’s water breaks at 36 weeks before they even finish shooting the episode. While Mila, who had done a lot of work to reduce her anxiety and build trust in the birth process, had hoped for an unmedicated labor, the way things play out induction and then pain medications ended up being needed. They share how Mila pushed for 3 hours, and just as things were headed for a c-section, Shawn asked if the vacuum was an option because Mila really wanted to avoid a surgical birth. So, a vacuum was used to assist with the delivery. Then they explain how baby went to the NICU for 6 days due to some breathing issues and needing  phototherapy for jaundice. Mila discusses the helpful early breastfeeding support she received in the hospital, and also shares already preferring to having an out-of-hospital birth attended by a midwife and a doula for the next time around.

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For the first time on this podcast, an almost-complete birth team is joining us today for a birth circle of sorts. Kelsey shares her firstborn’s story, with her midwife, Jenna Sood & her doula, Christine Gibson, providing their perspectives and filling in gaps where Kelsey’s memory becomes foggy. Kelsey had spent a lot of time in pregnancy envisioning and planning for the kind of birth she desired, which was an unmedicated birth in which she felt connected and well-supported. Her labor surprises her, similarly to Elaine’s story earlier this season and Toni in the last episode, in being a shorter-than-average first-time labor. This episode really drives home in a new way the power of surrounding yourself with compassionate care providers and support toward an amazing birth.

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In today’s episode, Toni & Peter share their firstborn’s birth story only about 6 weeks after the big day. Originally they had hoped for a completely unmedicated birth. They share how, as they approached and passed the due date, they tried everything under the sun to go into labor spontaneously, to no effect. The unexpected development of needing induction just after 40 weeks due to developing borderline preeclampsia then required some adjusted expectations. You’ll hear how strong self-advocacy techniques were game-changers that Toni & Peter used to delay and, ultimately, avoid using pitocin for labor. They also share how their doula and Peter set up the hospital room in a way that was both meditative and celebratory, including the use of battery-operated candles, aromatherapy, music, and even a hand drum and dancing. As a psychotherapist who specializes in meditation and mindfulness, Toni details how she used those skills and tools to have an almost completely unmedicated, quick 5-hour induced labor in which she pushes the baby out in only 4 pushes. In light of the fact that most inductions are expected to take, on average, 24 hours, and even spontaneous first-time labors take 18 hours on average, this was doubly fast and efficient. Toni gives a couple of insights and recommendations to listeners for early breastfeeding, and they both reflect on the moment of meeting their daughter as well as the monumental transition into parenthood.

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Today you’ll hear a story shared by Amayra, a black woman living in NYC who initially planned to give birth at home due to her knowledge about the poor outcomes for black birthing folks in hospitals. 

Things took an unexpected turn when Amayra learned her baby had a cleft diagnosis so that she needed to switch to a hospital birth attended by midwives. Amayra shares how she intentionally chose black care providers not only for her birth support team, including her doula, but also as she selected a surgeon during pregnancy to correct the cleft soon after birth. Amayra also provides a bunch of excellent tips for expectant and new parents toward the end, too, so be sure to listen to the whole episode.

After Amayra shares her story, you'll hear about these poor outcomes further, and Lisa will share specific ways you can help improve the state of maternal health in our city and country.

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Today we're excited to have a wonderful NYC midwife, Elaine Keller-Duemig, on the show. 

Elaine was the care provider in last episode's 2 birth stories and, in this episode, shares her own baby’s birth story. She chose to gave birth at the hospital where she works with a midwife at her practice, Central Park Midwifery. 

This is a story of a shorter than average first-time labor in which she gets to the hospital in the nick of time. Elaine shares how, experientially, the unpredictability of how labor can go felt kind of surprising. It’s amazing how, no matter your level of expertise, birth will always feel mysterious and unknowable and we can’t get into our heads too much. 

Elaine also shares about her journey into her work as a midwife and a bit about the midwifery model of care.

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In this episode, Yuliya shares both of her babies’ birth stories. She explains how she made the intentional choice of working with a practice of in-hospital midwives as well as hired a doula for both births, as this was the kind of birth team that she felt could help her have the kind of physiological births she hoped for.

While she didn’t plan or hope to have 2 inductions, that’s how things played out given unexpected circumstances in each pregnancy of low amniotic fluid and then the pandemic. 

She details how she was able to cope with both medical inductions with non-pharmacological pain coping techniques using some of the techniques she knows intuitively and as a clinical psychologist as well as with the support of the team she so carefully chose.

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