Blockbuster Film School

Come with me if you want to live. (Long awkward silence) Alright, come with me if you want to listen to our Terminator 2: Judgement Day 30th anniversary special. There we go! James Cameron’s sci-fi action classic was a phenomenon upon release and the majority of it still holds up today. The Office Hours crew nerd out discussing Arnold, Sarah Conner, the T-1000, and a child actor precautionary tale. There is no time machine or nostalgia blinded by memories of our youth. It’s just three film fans watching an old dvd talking about all nine of Cameron’s ex-wives. Spoiler alert: Gale Anne Hurd is our favorite. It’s T2 time. Dun dun dun dun dun.

There are over four hundred species of berries so for all the great ones like Matt or Gwen Berry you might end up with a Marion Barry. Once in a great while you find a berry so exceptionally charismatic that three years after becoming the first woman of color to win best actress (#oscarssowhite) she accepted her Catwoman Razzie in person. Halle Berry is an icon across many mediums who can sell make up, create weather patterns telepathically, and look at John Travolta’s stupid facial hair without flinching. Everything he does is wrong; everything. Join Blockbuster Film School as we stand in awe of Halle Berry and all her talents, even when they are wasted in terrible hacker movies starring L. Ron’s Italian step-son.

Lon Chaney was known as the man of a thousand faces. He’ll have his own episode at some point. This one is about a man who is the polar opposite of Chaney: Clint Howard only has one face, a face so distinctive you’ll never be able to forget it. You will always remember part two of the B-Movie Mania crossover episodes as they enter our world and take a deep dive into the career of Ron Howard’s brother. Clint Howard has somehow managed to be in almost every movie made since the year 2003. You’ve seen twelve of them. It’s the podcast romance of the century: B-Movie Mania and Blockbuster Film School together again. Until liver failure do we part.

Do you like your podcasts with two scoops or one? If you said two (and let’s be clear: your answer did not matter) you are in luck today because it is our first ever crossover episode with the living legends at B-Movie Mania! We combined our humor, film knowledge, and alcoholism to tackle the 90s no budget classic Ice Cream Man. That makes Clint Howard the extra crispy drumstick on top of our chicken n waffles crossover sundae covered in wormwood liqueur sprinkles. It sounds better than it reads. B-Movie Mania & Blockbuster Film School, together at last.

If we were to be honest the scariest parts of the 90s would be oversized jeans, nu-metal concerts, and Court TV. Horror movies of that time often get overlooked because, well, they weren’t the best. The office hours crew found some of the best 90s horror films available on streaming services so you don’t have to. Now you can avoid the memory of seeing The Relic in theaters with your cousin and her weird boyfriend Derek who wore a backwards red baseball cap everywhere. He’s a cop now; shocker.

In the before time people couldn’t see colors. The heads at MGM studios said, “we need yellow bricks and green women” and films were never the same again. Regardless of how much of that is true black and white films have become an under appreciated medium. The office hours crew hand picked some of our favorite B&W streaming picks for you to enjoy. Welcome to Blockbuster Film School. *Cue Jurassic Park Music*

Before every Thursday night sitcom had people staring into the camera discussing how to put a stapler in Jell-O, a string of independent comedies perfected the faux documentary film. The common denominator for many of those movies was the 5th Baron Haden-Guest, better known as Christopher Guest. Since Guest and his collaborators respect their characters the jokes are genuine and do not rely on cringe. They are earnest people who simply can’t do a single damn right. It’s always funny, even through the heartbreak. Blockbuster Film School isn’t crying, you’re crying. So here is to Christopher Guest, the only royal who understands the absurdity of life as a commoner.

Wait, I’m sorry did you just say that BFS is doing a watch along to Wayne’s World? Exsqueeze me? Baking powder? That’s right. It is not bogus or sad it is excellent. I had never done a crazy thing in my life before BFS, why is it if you kill a man in war it is called heroic but if you kill him during a watch along it is called murder? Marriage is punishment is for shoplifting in some countries and we are giving you a no honk guarantee. So learn Cantonese to impress the lead singer of Crucial Taunt, watch along with the boys, and get ready for the mega happy ending! Zang!

Here at Blockbuster Film School we ask hard questions. Questions like where is Cher’s closet fashion software from Clueless goddamnit? How am I supposed to dress myself? As if. Or do you ever pretend that Jeff Spicoli and Sean Penn are different people because Spicoli is the fucking man and Penn seems like kind of a dick? Also, do you get aroused when you hear The Beach Boys and see sperm? Or wait, how much money did you say the telepathic baby movie made? Holy shit. The boys tackle all these dope Amy Heckerling based questions only on Blockbuster Film School!!!

To quote celebrity crazy person Eric Andre, you gotta give the Internet what it wants. The cries for equality have not been answered yet but the D.C. fan boys were gifted a four hour wet dream when Zack Snyder’s cut of Justice League landed on streaming. The sprawling epic is better than expected but also stupid as all hell. The Office Hours crew explored what scenes made us confused, angry, happy, sad, bloated, hungover, and other emotions that Zack Snyder doesn’t fully understand. Check out the episode then sign our petition for the release of the six hour cut of The Thin Red Line. Release the Brody cut!