Blokes Don't Talk

Episode 21 - Coming Home, Coming of Age.

From an artistic lad about town with a screw loose, to a selfless family man working as a screw, Matty Battley has seen a bit on his journey; a journey which at 41 years has already come full circle, and starts again every day. 

Matty talks about losing a teenage brother in a tragic accident, about receiving some good advice in his 20's to pull his head in, and about mental health in high pressure work places, among much, much more.  

This is one of our favorite interviews to date, and we know you'll love it too.  

Dare we risk doing an Episode 20 in 2020? Our chat with Bryce was certainly smoother than this year to date, but also eventful. 

The boxes in the corner.

When we move to a new house, it's not a home until we've fully unpacked; even that box full of shit that we don't quite know what to do with, but that contains items too significant to through out. 

Our mind is similar. As we move through life, and as we inevitably interact with trauma/failure/heartbreak/etc., we can have a tendency to compartmentalize these experiences so that we can quickly get on with life, rather the grieving/understanding/learning. We might not think that it matters, we might even think it is functionally healthy; but eventually we sit still. When we sit still in the house that is our mind, it's these boxes of unresolved trauma that can stop our mind from being a home; that can stop us sitting still and living in the moment.

With a career in TV and Radio Bryce has packed and unpacked an awful lot of boxes for a man of just 30. He has only just recently though, with the help of a supportive work place and a great counselor, started to acknowledge, explore and unpack those within; and it's changing his life. In a year when it's hard to find something to be excited about, Bryce is excited for today, tomorrow, and whatever comes next.  

In a world where you could be anything, be a good human.

Gen Z have the world (and the history there of) on the screen in their pocket. They are entrepreneurial, and near impossible to market to. They value experience, yet display the financial maturity & ambition of pre millennial generations. They're politically progressive, and will undoubtedly change the world; and quickly.

This new world of accelerated technology and communication lays a new world of possibility at Gen Z's feet, affording them quite literally the ability to change the world overnight. But how does that translate to the ability to change someone's day? How does potential interact with our inner voice when the tremendous noise of this new world grows silent?

In a world where you can do a rapidly growing anything, what do you do that is fulfilling?

Ryan Maidorn is prime Gen Z, but could very easily be Gen Y. He grew up in the country, where winter means AFL (Lindenow Football & Netball Club) and summer means cricket (Meerlieu Cricket Club) , and boxing (R U Fit with Paul Turk Carroll) fills the free nights and clears the mind. He loves and values his family, and shared times in the great outdoors.

He has a humble job with a very reputable employer (Morelli Furniture and Bedtime) that he takes great pride in, and is extremely thankful for. Ryan comes from Gen Z and can instantly reach 1000's of people with a picture, status or tweet, but it's not what you see of him. He works hard, he looks forward to the future, he smiles in the sun on a beautiful day, and, when he asks you a question, he looks you in the eye patiently, with his ears and heart open.

In a world where Ryan could be anything, his priority is being a good human, and ultimately, is there a single better way to change the world?

Summum bonum. Amor fati. Memento mori. Do the ultimate good. Love fate. Remember death .

Many men in 30's, 40's and beyond, turn to stoicism as a path to a more fulfilling interaction with life. Do what you should, when you should; accept that you don't control the outcome; know that you are ultimately fragile and that life is finite. Accepting this as a man entering one's post prime, feels like a deep exhale. It feels like learning something we biologically know.

But what does stoicism offer a young man barely entering the prime of his life? And, even if he holds the wisdom to believe the merit of the principle, he surely couldn't have been tested thoroughly enough by life to resonate with the deep evolutionary truths of the message surely; could he?

Bailey Ireland is a very interesting young man. He has been raised with optimism & enthusiasm in the face of significant adversity, and now exudes acceptance, compassion, and a healthy lacing of ambition. 

Author Steve Biddulph in his book 'The New Manhood' identifies 5 Truths of Manhood, in a list the could be considered a stoic antidote to the absence of coming of age initiations. His list reads:

1. You are going to die.

At 18 Bailey already knows and accepts these truths, and moves forward into life with excitement, not fraudulently unbreakable, but simple anti-fragile. 

Where to begin - this one's a ride; a ride there and back. Not so much a roller coaster ride, but a dusty 460km slog across the Northern Territory dessert on a squealing 2-stoke motocross bike kind of ride. 

The stifling heat, the choking dust, the fatiguing vibrations, the ear ringing roar of engines - some times in life you've just got to push your feet into those pegs, narrow your eyes, wind back that throttle and move forward unbroken. 

Abused by a friend of the family as a child, going through an explosive divorce and falling out with his daughter, and then having a blow out with his parents/family business partners, Mitch has had plenty of opportunities to stop showing up; but he hasn't. He shows up.

Now Mitch is running his own business, he's chasing around his 2-year-old son who he's raising with the love of his life, he's excited about entering the Finke Desert Race in 2021 (his third), and he's looking to repair those key relationships in his life; because life's too short. 

If you do the right things for long enough, life tends to work out. Life's fucking tough sometimes, but again, some times in life you've just got to push your feet into those pegs, narrow your eyes, wind back that throttle and move forward unbroken. 

It always feels disingenuous writing a blurb that's near clickbait when you're trying to encourage people to listen to the bloke next door tell his story; so we won't, but that doesn't mean there aren't interesting headlines around this man, simply that the man is more interesting than the headlines.

Jeremy Joiner is a proud Indigenous man and very intelligently informed on current affairs; yet we didn't even touch BLM movement and the current political climate - we explored things in common, not our differences.

Fighting out of Westside MMA, Jeremy is a former XFC Champion and in the very top echelon of Australia's Heavyweight MMA ranks; but we didn't really discuss fighting as a career -that's not why he fights.

A neck fracture, torn intercostal muscles and pending hip surgery, highlight Jeremy's significant list of major recent setbacks; but we definitely didn't talk about excuses - that's not Jeremy'ss style.

On a sunny winter's afternoon, in what was more of a conversation than an interview, Jeremy joined Braden on some patio chairs in the driveway to enjoy some lunch, have a drink, and to discuss their journeys towards being better men through the vehicle of martial arts. 

Jeremy is bloody witty, empathetic and articulate. This episode was a lot of fun, and we hope you enjoy it too. 

2020 has been a rollercoaster.

This past summer's 'fires of the century' which raged across eastern and southern Australia already feel some years ago. As a former timber industry worker and a man with a couple of degrees and a PhD around marine biology and the effect of climate change on crustaceans, it would have been bloody interesting to talk to Jason about the fires.

In South Eastern Victoria and Southern NSW, a 4-year drought broke after the fires to the extent flooding was an issue.  To add to the above credentials, Jason is from a farming family and this would have been something else fascinating to get his insights on.

Covid-19 rolled in and on top of his extensive understanding of biology, Jason resides in Broome, a town heavily reliant on the tourist trade. We wonder what he would have had to say about that?

2020 obviously wasn't done yet, and with the awful death of George Floyd in the US, the global BLM movement put a spotlight on our treatment of our indigenous population. Being that Broome is a gateway to many of our remote north-western indigenous communities, and being that Jason, among other professional responsibilities, teaches the business aspects of aquaculture to the local traditional landowners, we can't help but think it would be amazing to get his take on the state of the closing the gap efforts. 

With the above absorbed and considering Jason is married to an incredible lady with whom he awaits the arrival of twins, that he has a great job he loves and that he has a strong friend network, it could almost seem a waste to discuss with Jason to be the ups and downs of being a man. 

Braden probably felt the same, but 5 minutes in he had to pick up his jaw off the floor. Jason is a genuine, empathetic, generous and very intelligent man; but life still found him, as it does us all. Buckle in. 

The apple may fall far from the tree, but it's still an apple.

How does the son of a pharmacist mum and a factory worker father from Mysore in South-West Indian end up in Perth opening an authentic street food restaurant and building his own family? Simple really, through modelling the same ethos of hard work that he watched his mum and dad put in to ensure he and his brother had every opportunity in life as they grew up.

Ashish Chibba holds a Masters Degree in Hotel Management, and after quickly building a formidable CV in the broader Hospitality & Project Management field, he backed himself to go it alone, and in typical Ash fashion, one business was never going to be enough. Ash now has 3 diverse businesses on the go (Including Street Eats Eatery), whilst trying to raise two young boys with his highly intelligent, supportive & beautiful wife, Ashu.

Whilst Ash's drive makes it all but inevitable that he will build a beautiful life for the four of them, he and Ashu are working hard together to ensure he takes time to enjoy the beauty of their life today - and there is a lesson in that for us all.

When you meet a bloke who has a gorgeous family of 5, an elegant double story house, is the GM of a rapidly growing company, and plays weekly at one of Australia's top golf courses, you assume you're looking at someone who has taken a fairly consistent path through life. 

However, while Colin Ross's obsession for working hard originated in his late teens, it took until his early 30's until he could move past other addictions and move forward with life.

As it seems we do every week, we cover an awful lot of topics with Colin, from losing a friend to a heroin OD and falling behind on your tick, to amicably co-parenting in a blended family and the importance of local sports clubs.

Honesty, bluntness and empathy are a rare mix, a mix that Colin exudes and a mix that make this episode fairly entrancing. 

How the hell does a wee Scottish lad from a Labour/Nationalist factory town end up in Alice Springs, married to a conservative-leaning indigenous Australian?

In an episode topical to the current political divide and racial discussion across the Western World, Colin explains to us how while he’d never judged someone on their skin colour, he now understands how our indigenous people have traditionally sorted by skin type.

After an abusive upbringing and a toxic love affair with drugs and alcohol, Colin somehow wound up in the heart of Australia, sober, a proud husband and father, and an up-and-coming awarded musician with beautiful folk tones.

In a chat that went for not nearly long enough, we discuss:

- trying to be a good c#nt,

- having a better half who doesn’t take any crap, certainly not his, and the couple of influence he and Jacinta Price have stumbled into being,

- competing on The Voice and the tough times artists are facing during Covid-19,

- plus much, much more.

Strap in – Colin is very intelligent, articulate and hilarious; but life is still tough, and this is a tough conversation. But aren’t those the conversations worth having? As Colin says of the current situation, ‘Difficult conversations are important, it’s only when we stop talking that we end up in trouble.’