Picture yourself, listeners:

You've purchased premium tickets for the Outlaw Festival, which is not exactly a festival per say, but much more exactly a 4-way split bill consisting of "classic" podcasters who each "perform" a live podcast of exactly 48 minutes, "legends" in their own time and right, mind you, but now that we here mention it, the price per minute on this bad boy, what with the travel and hotels and campgrounds and food and outrageously priced alcoholic beverages, is really starting to steal your attention.

Anyway, it's also absolutely hot as H, and you've slogged through some real dog-butt live "classic" podcasters to get to this point, which is the precipice of what you've been waiting and hoping to experience first-hand, live, FINALLY, the act you and your fellow 40,000 concert-going travelers have ALL (and by all, we here mean you) been waiting for:

BOWIE VS. DYLAN Episode #72!!!!!!

The crowd goes wild, on this belated-upon-belated-upon-belated 72nd edition of Bowie vs. Dylan.

Dear Bowie vs. Dylan consumers:

Please find below a synopsis, free of charge, from one of our esteemed children, Mabel, of the following episode, #71 in an unending series.  Mabel also serves as an executive producer of the podcast, and was instrumental in actually getting Jake to post this sweet ep, which was truly meant to go live to the world at large not too long after 2023 ended, and 2024 began, because of course the subject matter of said sweet ep is a rundown of all of the many doings of David Bowie and Bob Dylan in the year 2023:

It was super cool and it now should be called: "Mabel's Dad's Cool Songs", and in Dad's cool songs, they talk about Bowie vs. Dylan, because they're really cool.  But there's no Charlie! Just Mabel and Dad; that's why it's "Mabel's Dad's Cool Songs". 

I'll bet you can't resist clicking "Download" now, can you, on the latest episode of Mabel's Dad's Cool Songs.

Quick survey, yes or no questions, real quick, no skin off your back:

Are you a frequent listener of podcasts?  Yes.

Do you frequently listen to podcasts that have music as their subject? Yes.

Do some of your most preferred music podcasts fall loosely under the category of "classic rock"?  I guess, but don't you find those genre signifiers outmoded and narrow in scope, especially as they pertain to certain artists who might happen to have decades-long, groundbreaking, and chameleonic careers?  

....... As a listener of classic rock podcasts, do you take a virulently entrenched stance as to who's better, David Bowie or Bob Dylan?  HELL YES.

As a listener of classic rock podcasts with a virulently entrenched stance as to who's better, David Bowie or Bob Dylan, would you be willing to engage in any sort of physical altercation with a member of the opposite preferred artist's camp, no matter how frighteningly it might escalate?  Why, I would fight someone right now given the opportunity.

When listening to this highly specific, but growing in popularity, niche of podcasting, do you want, hope, and in fact crave for the content of said podcasts to, for the most part, be about discussing and analyzing music that could be considered, at a minimum, "good", and hopefully "great to transcendent"?  Yes, that would be a reasonable expectation.

Then you've come to the wrong place, on this Top 10 Worst Songs of Their Entire Careers-themed episode of Bowie vs. Dylan.

Find out how shocked the boys are, on a scale of 1-10, that the Bowie camp decided to release TWO good boxsets in consecutive years.

Spoiler alert: the answer is 11.

But not to fear!  They also released literally 68 other things that weren't nearly as shockingly excellent.

And what's that, you ask? Did Dylan do some stuff, too, whether good, bad, or ugly? 

Spoiler alert: the answer is maybe?

2022 is the new boss that you meet that's the same as the old boss, on this episode of Bowie vs. Dylan.

Say there:

Are you one of the lucky few Bowie vs. Dylan fans who have invented and/or participated in time travel, thereby allowing yourselves to go forward a few (dozen) years in time and pick up the Bowie vs. Dylan archival release deluxe edition box set, and then travel back to the present day to compare that future release, which of course includes Episode #68 (Top 10 Archival Releases), to the current one (Episode #68, Top Ten Archival Releases), just to see if the archival bonus material is truly revelatory, or just another shameless cash grab from we here at Bowie vs. Dylan?  

You did?  

Well, then can we offer you a full refund on this podcast in the present day?  Or at the very least, can we offer a compromise that I think will work out excellently for both parties?  Here's the deal: we here will send you there compact discs of each 10 minute segment of "Ep 68" (as its colloquially known in the future, but of course you already know that), each of the 14 discs in its own lovingly rendered mass-produced cardboard sleeve and meant to be housed in 6 different boxes of varying sizes, which are sold separately and (checks online) just sold out.  The shipments of each disc and box will be extremely late and each piece will incur an extra shipping charge.

In return, you there will send us 175 buckaroos, on this edition of Bowie vs. Dylan.

Thanks podcast audience, for choosing and paying handsomely for this LIVE from bowievs.dylan.com concert experience!  We thank you kindly for your patronage, and we hope you enjoy this LIVE concert experience!

Editor's note: this experience is neither concert, nor LIVE.  What's that you say?  You figured that out the moment you clicked on the link that you paid handsomely for?  You didn't want to pay for a tasteful black and white-filmed rendition of BvD's greatest early hits, only this time in differing Americana-flavored arrangements?

Well, that's all fine and good, but I bet you also didn't want to pay handsomely for 6 nearly-identical David Bowie concerts from the 90's, plus a frickin' sold-out BOX to house them in, plus shipping and handling on each and every one, only to find that neither the CD's or the box were actually arriving on time, did you?  But you did.

And I bet you didn't want to pay handsomely for 2 separate (but nearly identical) super-deluxe editions of a sprawling Bob Dylan Bootleg Series exclusively dedicated to the most wayward and frankly cheesy period of his career, now did you?  But you did.

So just can it, pal.  We here at Bowie vs. Dylan know that you there will pay handsomely for any content that we here spew out, because we here are now a legacy act, and just you there wait until we're dead because that's really when the spigot gets blasting.

Happy New Year from Bowie vs. Dylan!

Charlie discusses Yo La Tengo's 1993 album "Painful", which is his entry for the "Late Bloomers" theme.  Jake listens to it at the gentle behest of Charlie, and wants to discuss it as well, but is too busy gazing at his shoes and tinkering with that damn organ to really do it justice.

Ouch!  That really hurts, it's almost painful, on this episode of Louder Than Sound.

On this episode, Jake discusses Wilco's 1995 album "Being There", which is his entry for the "Late Bloomers", or as it's more colloquially known, "Albums We Didn't Like at First but Came To Love", theme.  Chaz listens to it  at the gentle behest of Jake, and wants to discuss it as well, but is too busy traveling in a time machine to recommend it to Jake again in the year 2000, just so that he can take credit for Jake's hopeless love affair with it even more in the year 2021 on this podcast.

There's rows and rows of houses, with the windows painted blue, on this episode of Louder Than Sound.

It's an extravaganza!  

If by extravaganza, you mean a continuing little break from our usual format to present a celebration and countdown of hosts Jake and Charlie's favorite albums from the years of our Lord 1970-1974 in an alternating format that starts this time at #5 and finally ends at #1, then yes!  

It's definitely an extravaganza, on this edition of Louder Than Sound.

It's an extravaganza!  

If by extravaganza, you mean a little break from our usual format to present a celebration and countdown of hosts Jake and Charlie's favorite albums from the years of our Lord 1970-1974 in an alternating format but stopping at our number 6 album and continuing next time with the rest, then yes!  

It's definitely an extravaganza, on this edition of Louder Than Sound.