Boys Built Better

Laughing Buck Farm

Today I am chatting with Rosemary Graff owner of Laughing Buck Farm in Fort Collins. Five or so years ago, a friend introduced me to this little gem in Northern Fort Collins and my children have been going there in some capacity ever since. Laughing Buck Farm is home to a farm preschool, home-school classes, summer camps and more.

I am so grateful for the time my youngest spent at farm preschool. He started when he was just three and was lucky enough to attend for three years before transitioning to kindergarten. During that time, he fed the animals, worked in the garden, rode horses, climbed hay bales and explored. He worked in the rain, in the heat of the early school year and even showed up all bundled with a thermos of hot chocolate when it was 20 degrees.

And do you know what? He is more resilient for it.

Today we are discussing farm life, the reality of chores how you can (or cannot) build work ethic and growing boys who love to be outside.

Live in Fort Collins? Check out the programming available at Laughing Buck Farm

Timestamps

• Growing up on a Farm (5:30)

• Deciding to Buy Acreage (7:08)

• Raising Kids on a Farm (10:28)

• Work Ethic? (11:58)

• Growing Responsibility with animals (15:29)

• Creating a Farm School (17:26)

• Daily Life (20:46)

• Understanding the Circle of Life (25:09)

• Outside Year Round (29:00)

• Allowing Kids to Take Risks (35:00)

• Getting Kids Outside (39:54)

What on Earth do you get a 12-year-old boy for XMAS?!This is what I typed into my search bar this weekend. He just had a birthday and he couldn’t even tell me what he wanted for that, now XMAS? In a way, I am glad. He understands that he already has what he needs and seems to appreciate those things. That’s awesome. But I still need to find at least something to put under the tree, right?With that in mind, I opened my computer and combed through multiple articles on “What to get your 12-year-old boy”. Did you know those articles existed? If you haven’t already searched the same thing, let me tell you there are hundreds of them! But here is what I found on my own search, none of them are very good. The links that I clicked came up near the top of my search and what I noticed is that none of them seemed to written by actual parents of boys!!!!I want Christmas morning to be special, and I want the interest in those gifts to last longer than those few hours. Despite how quickly my kids rip through the packages, I actually put a lot of thought into what I buy and use those gifts to (when I can) spark new interest or new hobbies. My answer? Another one of those lists!!!There is no way my list will appear anywhere close to the top of a similar google search, but this is a list of what my boys are actually getting this year (shhh, don’t tell) and tried and true favorite gifts from over the years. Real gifts with real thoughts on them.GamesThis is a tradition of ours. Every year, each one of my children gets a new game. I love that we have something that we get to sit around and learn together and that gets to be brought out again and again as part of our time together. Here is what will be under the tree this year plus a few favorites from the part.For the 2-year-old – Catan

For the 10-Year-Old- Double Shut the Box

For the 6-Year-Old – HoneycombsPast favorites

For 8+ – Farkle 

For 8+ – Sushi Go

For 6+ – Labyrinth

Preschool – Feed the WoozleBuildingGiven that my middle son has always loved Legos, I usually include a building toy. I have started moving away from Lego sets as my builder tends to build them once and then break them down to be used to rebuild something from his imagination. That means we have a lot of Legos!!!! If there was a particular set I would probably give one, but this year I thought we would up our building game by trying something new.For the 10-year-old – LittleBits

For everyone (over 3) – PlusPlus

Past Favorites

For 3+ – Magnetic Blocks

For 5+ – Straws and ConnectorsActiveWhether indoor or outdoor, I love gifts that get my kids moving. This year my oldest is getting the most active toys and I am trying to inspire him to spend less time in front of his...

Today I am chatting with Shana Kagan, founder of Jedi Tedi about her son’s Complex Regional Pain Syndrome diagnosis.Since November is CRPS Awareness Month, I thought I would help shed a little more light on Complex Regional Pain Syndrome. This is something that my son was unfortunately diagnosed with this time last year after a competitive soccer injury. After days of not being able to bear weight on his leg after the injury, we saw a local sports medicine doctor who x-rayed my son’s leg. Although swollen, he did not find any significant injury: certainly nothing that would cause the amount of pain he was in. An MRI came back clear as well...In the doctor’s office, after the MRI, we were given a diagnosis of CRPS. For my son, the symptoms were pain disproportionate to the initial injury, inability to bear weight on his right leg, inability to bear any contact with his right leg and cold to the touch body temperature below the affected knee. We were sent on our way and told to let the doctor know if he didn’t get better in 6 weeks at which time we would be sent to the pain clinic at our local children’s hospital.For my son, his pain lifted about a week and a half after his injury and although he has experienced a handful of “flare ups” over the past year, it is not something that we are dealing with chronically. While I am grateful for my own son’s recovery, other patients are not as lucky.

It seemed important to bring more awareness to this not only for the sake of those currently suffering, but as a reminder that you never quite know what it’s like in someone else’s shoes. And you certainly can’t judge a book by its cover.Recommended Resources:

• Know someone with CRPS or want to donate to Jedi Tedi? Find out more information at jeditedi.net or follow Jedi on Facebook

• Visit the RSDSA for more information about CRPS in youth

• Need help with your child’s chronic pain? Check out Conquering Your Child’s Pain by Lonnie ZeltzerTimestamps:

• What is CRPS? (4:23)

• The Struggle to get Diagnosed (7:33)

• Prognosis (9:14)

• Pain Levels (10:49)

• Let’s Not Judge (12:58)

• Treatments (15:54)

• Therapies (22:34)

• Giving Back (29:20)Want to Learn More about visiting South Africa? Contact [email protected]

Today I am chatting with Shana Kagan, founder of Jedi Tedi about her son’s Complex Regional Pain Syndrome diagnosis.

Since November is CRPS Awareness Month, I thought I would help shed a little more light on Complex Regional Pain Syndrome. This is something that my son was unfortunately diagnosed with this time last year after a competitive soccer injury. After days of not being able to bear weight on his leg after the injury, we saw a local sports medicine doctor who x-rayed my son’s leg. Although swollen, he did not find any significant injury: certainly nothing that would cause the amount of pain he was in. An MRI came back clear as well...

In the doctor’s office, after the MRI, we were given a diagnosis of CRPS. For my son, the symptoms were pain disproportionate to the initial injury, inability to bear weight on his right leg, inability to bear any contact with his right leg and cold to the touch body temperature below the affected knee. We were sent on our way and told to let the doctor know if he didn’t get better in 6 weeks at which time we would be sent to the pain clinic at our local children’s hospital.

For my son, his pain lifted about a week and a half after his injury and although he has experienced a handful of “flare ups” over the past year, it is not something that we are dealing with chronically. While I am grateful for my own son’s recovery, other patients are not as lucky.
It seemed important to bring more awareness to this not only for the sake of those currently suffering, but as a reminder that you never quite know what it’s like in someone else’s shoes. And you certainly can’t judge a book by its cover.

Recommended Resources:
• Know someone with CRPS or want to donate to Jedi Tedi? Find out more information at jeditedi.net or follow Jedi on Facebook
• Visit the RSDSA for more information about CRPS in youth
• Need help with your child’s chronic pain? Check out Conquering Your Child’s Pain by Lonnie Zeltzer

Timestamps:
• What is CRPS? (4:23)
• The Struggle to get Diagnosed (7:33)
• Prognosis (9:14)
• Pain Levels (10:49)
• Let’s Not Judge (12:58)
• Treatments (15:54)
• Therapies (22:34)
• Giving Back (29:20)

Want to Learn More about visiting South Africa? Contact [email protected]

If there is one thing that has been in the news lately, it is boys and sex.The focus has been on violence and men behaving badly, right? Well, as a parent how do you combat that? How do you teach your own son to do better?  It starts by talking about sex and that conversation needs to happen earlier than you would expect.Today we are talking to Kori Wilford, a public health educator with the Larimer County Department of Health, on how to raise sexually healthy boys and how to initiate that conversation early and often.From the definition of sexual health, to today’s research, to what to teach at all ages, this episode is not only fascinating but filled with great information and practical tips on how to tackle this conversation no matter how old your child is.Things I never knew until this interview:* Sexual Health is like skin care, it’s never too early or too late to start

* Research shows that a comprehensive approach to sex education delays your child’s first sexual experience

* Young children who can properly name body parts are less likely to be perpetrated against

* Your child will come to you with questions if they haven’t already learned that questions are not okay

* You can teach about your family’s values while also teaching about sex

* If you decide to pick up a book for your child read it first (but maybe not on a plane, because that is when I decided to preview The What’s Happening to My Body: Book for Boys and while I LOVE this book, I’m not sure my fellow passengers were prepared for the diagrams)Recommended Resources:* It’s Perfectly Normal by Robie Harris

* What’s the Big Secret?: Talking about Sex with Girls and Boys by Laurie Krasny Brown

* What’s Happening to my Body? Book for Boys by Lynda Madaras

* Advocates for Youth Parent Sex Ed CenterTimestamps* The Definition of Sexual Health (8:35)

* Sex Education research today (9:36)

* Comprehensive Approach Vs. Sexual Avoidance (11:14)

* What’s Different Today (12:52)

* Sex Ed at Different Ages (16:19)

* Infants and Toddlers (17:01)

* Preschool Aged Kids (18:58)

* Elementary School (27:40)

* The Start of Puberty (33:52)

* Middle School (35:30)

* Teaching Your Families Values (39:41)

* Learning Your Child is LGBTQ (42:13)

* High School (44:08)

* The Dos and Don’ts of Answering Questions (48:11)

* Resources (51:20)

If I could go back in time: Sleep Apnea and TonsillectomiesRaising kids is full of ups and downs and there are definitely things I wish I could have done differently along the way.  If I could, for example, I would have changed the way I handled video games at an earlier age.  But even though I have some regrets about that, it’s nothing I couldn’t change now if I wanted to.  There is one thing, though, I didn’t handle well and now that it is done, I cannot undo the consequences.My middle son, most likely had undiagnosed sleep apnea for 4 years.  I noticed the first symptoms at 1 year of age and his tonsils and adenoids were removed at 5.  In between, he was chronically unrested which led to behavior issues and academic delays that I believe still haunt us to this day.Unfortunately, there isn’t much I can do about his journey. But, with my youngest just being ordered a sleep apnea test, I thought I would tell our story so others may avoid all the difficulties we had.Show Notes

Articles on Sleep Apnea* Stanford Children’s Health-Obstructive Sleep Apnea

* Mayo Clinic- Pediatric Sleep Apnea

* Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia- Obstructive Sleep ApneaTonsillectomy Book* Good Bye, TonsilsTimestamps* My One Regret (0:38)

* I’m Not a Doctor (3:58)

* What is Sleep Apnea? (4:34)

* Causes of Sleep Apnea (6:06)

* My Child Snores (6:58)

* ENT Visit (10:10)

* Symptoms of Sleep Apnea (10:44)

* How to Get Diagnosed (15:54)

* Treatment (18:32)

* Tonsillectomy Tips (19:30)

In the last of our series on transitioning to schools, today I am chatting with Alexis Karasek, a mom whose son just graduated high school.  In our other transitioning episodes, we focused on making a one-grade leap.  Since high school spans a lot of change maturity wise, today we are talking about your child from 9th-12th.

 

Want more transitioning episodes?  Check out our episode on starting elementary school and our episode on middle school.

 

Show Notes* Parenting with Love and Logic

* Parenting with Love and Logic for Teens

* Are you a lawnmower parent? Here’s a link to the article we talked about if you haven’t seen it.

 

Timestamps* Why talk about high school as a whole instead of just 9th? (3:44)

* First two/ last two years of high school (4:47)

* Learning to Drive (8:59)

* Looking Back with Perspective (11:40)

* Bad Decisions (13:52)

* Letting your son find himself (17:33)

* Personality vs. Parenting (21:59)

* Don’t save him (25:40)

* Fail and Figure it out (26:51)

Chatting with my friend Erin Dirvonas about transitioning to middle school. Since I have two kiddos making transitions this I have been thinking a lot about them.  Today I am chatting with my friend Erin about middle school and making the change easiest on everyone.Show Notes* Cooler Lunch Bag

* Locker Shelf

* Locker White Board

* Bike rackTimeStamps* The sixth-grade experience (5:50)

* Similarities to Elementary? (6:44)

* Teacher Communication (7:54)

* Developing Independence (10:07)

* Lunch Questions (13:14)

* Dealing with the locker (14:24)

* Time Management (15:45)

* Learning to speak for yourself (17:25)

* Picking an instrument (19:36)

* All the girls (22:50)

* Changing throughout the year/ grades (25:20)

* What to prepare for ahead of time (29:22)

* Learning to contemplate and expand ideas (31:14)

* Devices and social media (33:41)

* Parenting through middle school (36:14)

Chatting with my friend Sydney Smith about transitioning to kindergarten. I’ve been thinking a lot about getting my own son ready for kindergarten and moving to such a big building.  We discuss academics, independence skills and tips to make the transition easier. Show Notes* Sydney’s favorite thing: Guardians of galaxy CD

* Jessica’s favorite thing: Hose reel

* Recommended workbooks to prep academically

* Easier way to tie shoes

* Easy to open(and pack!) lunchboxTimeStamps* Our current favorite things (1:23)

* Getting to know this week’s guest (3:30)

* Thought on becoming a mother later in life (4:29)

* Kindergarten overview (5:58)

* Waiting a year (8:22)

* What you need to know about academics (10:14)

* Zippers, buttons and pants, oh my! (19:04)

* The joys of new kids and peer pressure begins (24:54)

* Carpool Etiquette (29:05)

* Thinking about Lunch (30:58)

Solo Episode, chatting about all things summer! Organizing yourself and your kiddos, fun activities, keeping up with academics and staying sane!!Tip 1- Get OrganizedTo Do Sheet – A few years ago, I used a “No Screen-time Until” sheet to this one to get us organized. I customized ours to reflect the things I wanted my kiddos to do each day. Here is a link to a great example. https://www.yourmodernfamily.com/no-screen-time-until-free-printable/Mom Bucks – Last year I used a more elaborate system of currency during the summer. My kids could earn “mom bucks” for doing chores, reading, spending time outside and then could spend the bucks on time playing video games, a special treat, or could save up to exchange for real dollars. The blog I based my system is this one. http://faithfilledparenting.com/mom-bucks/Organizing a summer with a Planner – This year, I am using an individual planner to keep my big kids organized. They are filling it out with daily and once a week chores. Check out my blog about using the planners here. https://boysbuiltbetter.com/education/summer-planner-lessons-for-tweens/Tip 2- Keep Up the AcademicsMath Facts – A small amount of time each day spent keeping up with math facts will make a big difference next school year. We get a packet sent home, but you could easily make your own based on your child’s level or buy a practice book. Tip! If you buy a book, put the pages in a sleeve protector and use a dry erase marker to complete, the book will last longer!!Here are some practice books specific to elementary school:Read 20 minutes a day – this is another great summer habit that will pay off next year. If you happen to have a reluctant reader, take the pressure off and choose books that your kiddo finds fun. This is the time to read for enjoyment!! The less pressure, the better.Handwriting lessons- Does your school teach handwriting? A lot of elementary schools have dropped this and no longer spend time working on it in class. I still think being able to hand-write is a great skill and there is research that states it supports the growth of reading, writing and language ability. Summer is a great time to work on growing this forgotten skill. And LOOK! There are even handwriting books developed just for boys:Tip 3- ActivitiesPerler Beads – This has been our favorite summer activity for three years straight. My boys started out copying designs and have now graduated to creating their own (sometimes 3-D) designs. Check out my blog about getting started. https://boysbuiltbetter.com/arts-and-crafts/getting-started-with-perler-beads/Rock Painting – This is the activity that I am introducing this summer (blog post coming soon). We recently went to the craft store and bought brushes https://amzn.to/2suZDmf, acrylic paint https://amzn.to/2syiH2U, varnish https://amzn.to/2JkEaCX and a great book https://amzn.to/2JmmQNI. I love this craft because we can hunt for rocks in our neighborhood and now that I bought a few supplies there is no additional cost for the canvas! We have already had a few neighbors around painting.Family Show – Because the summer is so open ended, I think creating some routines is helpful for kids. This year we decided to start watching America’s Got Talent together as a family. My husband, who often works nights, has set Tuesday’s aside and we are all sitting down together to enjoy it. A regular game night would also be a great option.Sci-Fri – I forgot to include this in the episode, but a few years ago I started Science Friday or “Sci-Fri” days during the summer. I got a small science kit https://amzn.to/2LqJJjA and we would work through an experiment every Friday. The kit is great because it includes the experiments as well as hard to find supplies.Evenings Outside – Another routine we started this year, is committing to spending sometime outside after dinner playing a game. There is something special about being outside just before dusk. We found a great outdoor game https://amzn.to/2szsHca that has you hitting a soft ball, but the included discs make the best Frisbee that is super easy to throw and catch.What are you doing to survive the summer? Let me know!