What happens when you bring together a group of people who don’t know the difference between jello and jelly, dolphins and porpoises, or Bowser and Professor Utonium? Most certainly the answer is, this episode of Brackets. Listen as we dream up brand new sitcoms involving landlocked sea creatures and ponder the possible replacement of Powerpuff Girl Bubbles with Princess Peach.

‘A Little Cuppa’ Somethin” vs ‘ A Scaredove’

‘Nips And Dip’ vs ‘Moving With Porpoise’

‘To Whom It May Concern’ vs ‘Five Dollar Credit Card Minimum’

Featuring: Alex Goodman, David Vornholt, Corinne Florentino, Jenny McPherson, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

As Brackets draws near to the first Tournament of Champions, we take a look back at some of our favorite contenders that made up our first fifteen brackets. Some we loved and were gone too soon. Some we hated, and weren’t gone soon enough. All led us to this point, so listen in and take a nostalgic journey with us.

Featuring: The Bracketologists

Editor: Adam Decker

Have you ever wondered which ancient philosopher was the sexiest, whether you should brag about that time you fell down, or how weird is too weird when passing down an heirloom? The panel of Bracketologists becomes divided as they take on these issues and put the practicality of puns on trial in episode 15 of Brackets!

‘An Old Wooden Dildo’ vs ‘Double-Bubba’

‘Fly Ball, Ladies’ vs. ‘ Toes That Are Too Long’

‘A Jellyfish With Bones’ vs. ‘Giraffes With Short Necks’

Featuring: Elizabeth Allen, Audie Deinlein, Kevin Tognetti, Jared Smith, and Zach Decker

Host/Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

Everyone knows the iconic foursome that changed music forever. You know, the British invasion guys. They were all bald and painted blue and they played the drums and caught marshmallows in their mouths. We’re thinking of the same group, right? Regardless, these blue guys are important, and their genetic makeup is discussed, along with socialist dogs, sexual communication, and fresh footwear in this episode of Brackets.

‘Bark for Socialism’ vs ‘Baby Body Builder’

‘Shark of the Covenant’ vs ‘Formal Crocs’

‘Home School Mascot’ vs ‘Air Horn’

Featuring: Kyle Tomlin, Nate Odenkirk, Kristi Durkin, Kerry Stevens, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

We think highly of our Bracketologists. We wouldn’t bring them into the studio to make these important decisions without the utmost confidence in their competency and intelligence. That being said, we can’t explain how these five people can’t piece together the plot of Beetlejuice! Regardless, grannies are idolized, syphilis is encouraged, and the role of pork is disputed in episode 13 of Brackets!

‘More Like The GRAPE Gatsby’ vs ‘Wham, Bam, Thank You Ham’

‘Syphil-YAS!’ vs ‘April Tools’

‘Alge-bruh’ vs ‘A Fuzzy Remote’

Featuring: Megan Gray, Liam Collier, Adam Levonian, Corinne Hastings, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

Did you ever wonder what it would sound like when five people argue about how they picture an eating utensil in five vastly different ways? Well now your dreams can come true! When adding two brand new Bracketologists to the mix, gophers are adopted, sex positions are created, and beef is most certainly NOT reheated in this hot, no holds barred episode of Brackets.

‘April Juuls Day’ vs ‘Gopher Trophies’

‘Bro-ing Out of the Closet’ vs ‘Cold Beef’

‘I’ll Take “Popular Prisons” for 600’ vs ‘Toucan Samuel’

Featuring: Sam Otter, KJ Snyder, Sara Dirks, Stephen Mackey, and Zach Decker

Host/Editor: Adam Decker

Mixer: Jared Smith

This may be our most in sync group of Bracketologists to date, but that doesn’t exempt the episode from Brackets’ signature twists and turns. We are still doing the important work of answering questions like “How do gophers fit into the economy?”, “What might compose a lime’s one man show?”, and “Why would Biddies even want titties?” Make way for this large and in charge episode of Brackets!

‘Bananagram Split’ vs ‘Gophers? In This Economy?’

‘Llama Lia’ vs ‘A Slutty Orange’

‘Lulu Lemoncello’ vs ‘Make Way For The Meat Wagon!’

Featuring: Jake Rosko, Jenny McPherson, Caroline Hale, Adam Decker, and Zach Decker

Host/Mixer: Jared Smith

Editor: Adam Decker

Brackets is back at you with not only two brand new Bracketologists, but also a new format! Because we continually want to optimize the way in which we alienate Catholicism make weed jokes about environmental proposals.

‘The High Foot Five’ vs ‘The Way She Goes’

‘CT-AAAAYYYY’ vs ‘That One Toenail’

‘Hella Burnt Espresso’ vs ‘40 Days of Lent-il Soup’

Featuring: Audie Deinlein, Kylie Bruteman, Jared Smith, Corinne Florentino, and Zach Decker

Host/Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker

With a combination of brand new Bracketologists with ones who have been with us from the start, a whole lot of hot takes are getting thrown around. For example, the term “Comic Sans” could have about five different interpretations. Also, if there is no risk of dying while playing laser tag then there’s no point. Oh. and for the love of God! Look me in the eyes when you come… into rooms that I am in!

‘Teaching an Old Frog New Tricks’ vs ‘Alan’s Beef’

‘Paula Abdul-Jabbar’ vs ‘The Dragon from Neverending Story’

‘Fornication Station’ vs ‘Parmesan Sheep’

Featuring: Miles Potter, Tim Lewis, Kevin Tognetti, Alex Goodman, and Zach Decker

Host/Editor: Adam Decker

Mixer: Jared Smith

Something we can all agree on; when there is a bat in your walls, the only logical next step is to seduce it. But when deciding on what form a reptilian Supreme Court Justice will take, our Bracketologists may never come to a consensus.

‘Kinda True Crime Stories’ vs ‘Little Richard’s Little Richard’’

‘Fronch Vanilla’ vs ‘An Ass Full of Coffee’

‘Ruth “Gator” Ginsberg’ vs ‘No Chestnuts Here, I’m Afraid’

Featuring: Sam Otter, Jenny McPherson, Kristi Durkin, Stephen Mackey, and Zach Decker

Host: Jared Smith

Mixer/Editor: Adam Decker