Episode 75: The Cost of Caring—The Potential Risk of Compassion Fatigue

In episode 75 of Burnout Solutions, Mona explores Viktor Frankl’s quote, “What is to give light must endure burning,” to explain how caring for others can affect us without inevitably leading to burnout. She breaks down the difference between burnout (as defined by Christina Maslach) and compassion fatigue (as described by Charles Figley as burnout plus secondary traumatic stress), and challenges the idea that being emotionally “stoic” at work prevents harm. Mona explains how stress and fear can be learned and spread through teams (tertiary/contagious stress), especially in high-demand environments with limited resources and ongoing exposure to suffering. She shares common physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual signs of compassion fatigue, then offers four practical ways to start recovering: recharge your compassion “battery,” practice presence in small sensory moments, choose empowering language (“I’m choosing to”), and reframe tedious tasks as part of a bigger mission.

00:00 Cost of Caring Intro

00:59 Frankl and Burning

04:00 Compassion Fatigue Today

05:52 Stoicism Myth

07:45 Burnout vs Fatigue

10:38 Secondary Trauma Explained

13:45 Fear Is Contagious

17:36 Workplace Stress Drivers

21:33 Signs and Symptoms

24:55 Recharge Compassion

30:32 Micro Practices and Wrap

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Ep. 74: A Proven Training to Decrease Burnout and Compassion Fatigue- An Interview with Dr Eric Gentry

Mona shares her two-decade healthcare background and how chronic stress, sleeplessness, and emotional exposure led her to feel like she was failing, before realizing it was her nervous system reacting to accumulated painful experiences. She explains that what we call “a stressful life” is often an over-responding, dysregulated nervous system matching present-day challenges to past threats, something she believes has intensified since the pandemic. Mona introduces the Forward Facing Professional Resilience Workshop, which she’s certified to teach, and then talks with its founder, Dr. Eric Gentry, about how the program grew from his own burnout and early compassion fatigue research into a one-day, evidence-supported training with studies showing reduced stress symptoms and improved professional quality of life. They discuss nervous system regulation as mental PPE, restoring the “space” between stimulus and response, and how large-scale implementation improved hospital culture, satisfaction, and error rates.

00:00 Nursing Burnout Story

01:40 When Stress Takes Over

03:32 Your Nervous System Explained

05:26 Introducing Forward Facing

08:03 Tools Like Mental PPE

11:38 Interview Begins Dr Gentry

12:30 Origin of the Program

18:06 Why Burnout Is Rising

21:26 Peace vs Threat Response

23:39 Intentionality and Choice

25:21 Hospital Culture Results

29:51 Why Caregivers Suffer

35:49 Wrap Up and Next Steps

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Ep. 73 Grief in Burnout: Death, Non-Death Loss, and Healthier Ways to Process It

In episode 73 of Burnout Solutions, Mona talks about grief—why it’s been on her mind, how it can show up in everyday life, and why it matters for burnout. She reflects on a recent shooting in Twin Falls, Idaho that left her feeling heavy for days, then widens the lens beyond death to “non-death grief,” like relationship changes, career shifts, a diagnosis, a season ending, or grieving a version of yourself you miss. Mona also explores how grief can hide as over-control, hypervigilance, withdrawal, comparison, and shame, and reminds listeners there’s no “right” way to grieve. She shares a few practical ways to process loss, including naming it, allowing it, creating an emotional protocol, taking care of your body, and inviting connection instead of isolating.

00:00 Welcome and Topic

01:40 Headline Sparks Grief

04:19 Death Grief Basics

06:36 How Culture Shapes Death

11:04 Nursing and Compassion

12:42 Burnout and Letting Go

14:35 Non Death Grief

21:17 Hidden Grief Patterns

25:22 Time and Tolerance

26:46 Healthy Grief Tools

31:39 Final Wrap Up

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Ep 72 How to Start This School Year Without Carrying It All and Staying in Your Lane

Mona kicks off the new school year with reflections from a recent family cruise celebrating her parents’ 50th anniversary, then shifts into a conversation about how we can show up differently—especially as parents, nurses, and teachers—by learning the difference between caring and carrying. She explains how caring comes from a regulated, values-driven place, while carrying often comes from anxiety and survival responses that try to control outcomes. Mona shares examples from parenting and nursing, then walks through seven signals you may be carrying someone else’s load, along with practical ways to return to “overflow” support—pausing to check capacity, naming what’s yours versus theirs, resourcing instead of rescuing, allowing natural consequences, regulating yourself first, and releasing outcome-based scorekeeping.

00:00 Welcome and Life Update

01:11 New School Year Reset

04:05 Caring vs Carrying

06:06 Real World Examples

09:25 Seven Carrying Signals

14:47 Overflow vs Pressure

18:32 Six Practices to Stay in Lane

23:35 Closing and Next Steps

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Episode 71: Reframing Self-Care as Self-Awareness

In episode 71, Mona reframes self-care as self-awareness—something you can practice in micro moments all day, not just through vacations or “treat yourself” routines. She shares practical ways to check in instead of checking out, ask better questions, build emotional vocabulary, and feel a fuller range of emotions without judging yourself. Mona also talks about learning your nervous system patterns, giving yourself permission to say no, letting people be wrong about you, and taking responsibility for your own peace, joy, and self-compassion. She closes by encouraging listeners to accept and ask for help—including professional support—and invites anyone who wants guidance to book a burnout recovery call through the link in the show notes.

00:00 Self Care Reframed

03:08 Check In Not Out

05:45 Ask Better Questions

07:31 Name Your Emotions

10:39 Permission To Say No

12:26 Nervous System Patterns

14:11 Let Them Be Wrong

16:17 Own Your Peace

17:15 Practice Self Compassion

18:21 Accept And Ask Help

20:08 Closing Recap And Invite

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Three Ways to Outsmart Your Brain’s “I Don’t Want To”

In episode 70 of Burnout Solutions, Mona talks about why “I don’t want to” shows up so often—even with things we planned and genuinely want—using her kids’ flower garden and her 26-mile King’s Peak hike as examples. She explains the brain’s motivational triad (seek pleasure, avoid pain, conserve energy) and how the valuation system favors close, immediate rewards over distant, vague ones—especially under chronic stress and burnout. Mona shares three practical reframes to help you work with your brain instead of against it: make the reward feel closer (including if-then planning), borrow the power of connection by doing hard things with others, and look for “double wins” that feel good now and matter later. She also reminds listeners that sometimes rest is the right choice, and invites them to book a burnout recovery call.

00:00 Welcome Back Summer Wrap

01:50 Why We Say I Dont Want

02:55 Motivational Triad Basics

05:02 Kings Peak Motivation Story

07:45 Valuation System Explained

10:25 Reframe One Make Rewards Near

12:44 Reframe Two Use Connection

16:27 Reframe Three Double Win

17:49 Rest Is A Valid Choice

18:30 Final Recap And Next Steps

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

The Other Side of Fawning: When a Strong Personality Becomes “Pushy”

Mona builds on last week’s episode about fawning (the appeasing survival response) by exploring the “other side of the coin”: the strong, conflict-tolerant person who can unintentionally create an environment where others don’t feel safe to disagree. Using examples from church volunteering, her early marriage, and her nursing career, Mona explains how both fawning and fighting can be nervous system patterns rooted in fear, self-distrust, and a need for safety—just with different strategies. She shares practical ways she’s learning to soften the fighter pattern, including remembering there’s rarely one “right” answer, explicitly inviting disagreement, noticing when someone folds too fast, and watching for countermoves when challenged. She closes with what these patterns cost over time—energy, identity, relationships, and physical health—and offers compassion and hope for change on both sides.

00:00 Fawning Recap

01:50 Meet the Fighter

03:55 Church Volunteer Wakeup Call

07:25 Strong Personalities Explained

09:36 Fear Behind the Fight

14:31 Why Fawners and Fighters Pair

15:43 Where Do You Land

18:15 Four Ways to Soften

26:22 The Hidden Costs

30:18 Compassionate Closing

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

The Fawn Response: When “Being Nice” Is Your Nervous System in Survival Mode

Mona shares a coaching story about a talented choreographer/director who ran a children’s community play and couldn’t stop thinking about a cast-party moment where a parent pressured her into breaking a clear “cast members only” rule. Mona reframes this not as weakness or being a pushover, but as the nervous system choosing the fastest path to safety through the fawn response—appeasing to avoid conflict. She explains how fawning differs from simple people-pleasing, how it often forms through early experiences like emotional unavailability and learning to manage others’ moods, and what it can look like in adulthood (overexplaining, constant apologizing, anxiety around boundaries, resentment). Mona offers questions to spot fawning and emphasizes healing by building tolerance for the discomfort of saying no and holding boundaries.

00:00 Cast Party Conflict

02:59 Reframing as Fawn

04:13 What Is Fawning

07:04 Fawning vs People Pleasing

08:41 How Fawning Forms

12:02 Adult Signs of Fawning

15:32 Relationships and Burnout

17:38 Healthy Empathy vs Fawn

22:47 Why We Keep Fawning

28:25 Breaking the Pattern

29:39 Wrap Up and Next Time

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

E66: Disappointed? You Can Blame Your Biology

Mona shares how her son’s door-to-door fiber internet sales job shows the emotional toll of repeated rejection, then connects that experience to what she’s learning in neuroscience about burnout. She explains the habenula—especially the lateral habenula—a tiny brain structure that tracks when effort doesn’t match reward and can suppress dopamine and serotonin when stress and disappointment become chronic. Mona describes how this “nothing good is coming” signal can show up as loss of motivation, anhedonia, brain fog, decision fatigue, sleep disruption, and feeling unrewarded even when good things happen. She emphasizes burnout isn’t a character flaw, and outlines what helps: intentional small wins, movement, safe social connection, addressing what’s truly uncontrollable, reframing after regulation, and protecting sleep, plus an invitation to book a burnout call.

00:00 Door to Door Reality

01:28 Coaching Through Highs Lows

04:23 Burnout Has Biology

07:20 Meet the Habenula

09:27 Disappointment Center Explained

11:20 When Stress Sensitizes

13:36 Son Example and Burnout Loop

16:49 Signs of Hyperactivity

20:53 What Actually Helps

29:38 Recap and Next Steps

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.

Declaring Emotional Independence (Replay)

Mona shares that summer parenting with teenagers and getting less sleep in Boise has made her more emotionally reactive, so she’s replaying a popular episode on emotional independence in the spirit of the 4th of July. She explains how many of us hand the “remote control” of our feelings to kids, spouses, coworkers, or strangers, and how codependency and old wounds can keep us stuck in reactivity. Mona blends life coaching concepts with nervous system regulation, emphasizing that dysregulation narrows our window of tolerance and blocks agency and intuition. She walks through a practical process for when you’re triggered: notice dysregulation, do a mindful release, meet physical needs, clarify the relationship, separate facts from story, process emotions, consider what’s true and not true, reclaim how you want to feel, set boundaries, and let love and compassion be the final word.

00:00 Summer Parenting Struggles

00:45 Replay Episode Setup

02:22 What Emotional Independence Means

03:20 Remote Control And Codependency

06:58 Agency Intuition And Regulation

10:09 Triggers And Window Of Tolerance

10:55 Text Message Trigger Example

13:21 Mindful Release Exercise

17:36 Facts Versus Stories

20:14 Processing Emotions Properly

23:22 Finding Truth And Disagreement

25:42 Reclaim Power And Choose Love

29:21 Recap And Next Steps

32:46 Closing Coaching Invitation

To to find out more about how I can help your workplace or work with me one on one, please see www.monatippets.com

Want to understand your stress a little better? Get my free Stress Management Guide for High Achievers here.