Chris Marhefka Joins and reflects on his past tendency to control every aspect of his life, which led to success but also overwhelming stress.
He learned the lesson of not trying to control everything and finding a balance between doing what he loves and his work and allowing himself to rest. He describes the important of feeling passionate and energized about your work, and also recognizing the importance of enjoying life and not losing sight of what's else is really important.
Chris talked about how people often swing from one side of the pendulum to the other when learning lessons, and tells the story of why he took a break for about three years to recuperate from injury and massive burnout.
During this time, he let go of his anxious attachment to achievement and drive, and learned to check in with himself regularly, which he now teaches his students.
The three questions to ask yourself as a way to check-in:
1. What does my heart need?
2. What is out of alignment?
3. Where is the tension in my life currently?
By doing this, you could control the ebbs and flows of your own life, down to the moments, and fluctuate between going hard and relaxing.
Chris emphasizes that it's important to listen to the signs and make tuneups as soon as possible, rather than waiting until it's almost too late.
Matt talks about his own experience with trying to add more and do more in order to relieve pressure, but ultimately realizing that it's better to make little tweaks and shed what's unnecessary to create balance and alignment. He uses the analogy of learning to play a musical instrument, shedding the wrong notes and using intentional space to create a beautiful rhythm. He suggests that adding more complexity to one's life can create chaos and that shedding unnecessary layers is key to achieving balance and integration.
Learn more about Chris at https://www.chrismarhefka.com/ or on Instagram @chrismarhefka
The pattern of Always having an answer and always knowing. - 4:51
Fear of losing your passion. - 8:59
When you’re stuck in the middle of indecision and need to change. - 16:22
How to avoid the massive life changing disaster that may be sneaking up on you. - 21:47
The pendulum tends to swing from one end to the other. - 32:59
How being around children can help you become more present - 40:25
Exposing fear and going all in to conquer it - 47:57
Bringing silliness and laughter to anything immediately reduces the weight of it. - 51:41
You can’t change other people, they have to make the choice to change themselves. - 1:00:25