Christian Home and Family Radical Faith for Generations

This episode is brought to you by... DRAGON SLAYER: BEGINNINGS - Book 1 in my Christian fantasy series. The reviews I'm receiving on this book are both encouraging and incredible. Believe it or not, lives are being changed by this work of fiction. You can get your copy at htttp://www.DragonSlayerBook.com

Now, on with the podcast...

There are all kinds of ways it happens, from over-confidence, to lack of confidence, and everything in between. Another example is that we tend toward being unable to see our sin and the consequences of it with any sort of clarity. We excuse things we shouldn't and condemn things in ourselves that God put there for His divine purposes.

Living in a fog is no fun.

And here's the sobering thing: Our kids live in the same fog of self-perception. Just like us, they don't see themselves rightly. They struggle with doubt, condemnation, pride, and a host of other things just like we do. We BOTH need the clarity that only the wisdom of God can provide... and that's where we are incredibly blessed.

God Himself has promised that if we lack wisdom, there's an incredible resource at our disposal. Here's how the Bible states it...

If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given him. (James 1:5)

In my mind, it's one of the most amazing promises evergiven to us. Let's walk through it...

1 - GOD GIVES WISDOM.

That is truly amazing. We don't have to stumble along in the fog of what we think and feel and believe. We have access to a wisdom that can cut through the fog.

2 - GOD GIVES WISDOM GENEROUSLY

God is not stingy when handing out His wisdom. He gives it freely, generously, abundantly, to anyone who wants it.

3 - GOD GIVE WISDOM WITHOUT REPROACH

When we go to God for wisdom, God is not going to chide us for not being smarter or for not having things figured out. He's simply going to give us what we ask for.

4 - ALL WE HAVE TO DO IS ASK FOR IT

There's no outrageous pricetag on the wisdom of God. He WANTS His children to be wise (like He is). So He freely gives wisdom to us when we ask Him for it.

1 - Memorize James 1:5 as a family. Talk it over. Make sure everyone understands the amazing gift that God offers.

2 - Encourage everyone in the family to ask God for wisdom daily. Hold each other accountable. Make it a project you work on together.

3 - Follow up. Ask everyone how they're seeing God's wisdom come on line in their lives. Share your stories to give your kids examples of what it might look like.

4 - Don't let it die. Continue to talk about the importance of wisdom. Continue to pray for it as a family. Continue to trust God for the wisdom each of you need to see yourselves and God rightly, as you walk through life.

If you'd like to engage with me directly about this topic, please feel free to do so in the comments below.

The Christian Home and Family ministry is aimed at helping you develop a legacy of faith in your family that lasts for generations to come. If I can help you toward that end in any way, please contact me.

I also invite you to join the CHAF facebook community.

Finally, if you would take a few minutes to help spread the word about Christian Home and Family, I believe God would be honored. Go to here to find all the ways you can help.

This episode is brought to you by... DRAGON SLAYER: BEGINNINGS - Book 1 in my Christian fantasy series. The reviews I'm receiving on this book are both encouraging and incredible. Believe it or not, lives are being changed by this work of fiction. You can get your copy at htttp://www.DragonSlayerBook.com

Now, on with the podcast...

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When I was a kid, I had a terrible habit. I bit my fingernails. It doesn't sound like such a bad habit, but it wasn't just the nails themselves, I bit the skin surrounding my finger nails. I even nibbled the skin on the tips of my fingers. My fingers looked like trees after a beaver had gotten a hold of them, little tooth marks everywhere.

I remember trying to break that habit. It was extremely hard. Why? Because it was long-standing. I had begun my finger nibbling, probably around the time I was six years old, but I didn't try to break it until I was in my mid to late teen years. I was fighting ten years of physical repitition, psychological conditioning, absent-mindedness about the habit, and it wasn't easy.

I tell you that story to illustrate the power of a habit. But you probably didn't need the illustration at all. Every one of us has been challenged by the need to kick a habit of one kind or another. Smoking, drugs, cursing, anger, criticism, pride... the list goes on and on, doesn't it?

When we think of habits, we tend to think of the negative side of the subject, but I want to suggest to you that just like a bad habit starts young and becomes incredibly hard to break - a good habit can be built early, in the life of your children, and can serve them positively for their entire lives.

#1 - DAILY TIME WITH GOD

Our family has been blessed by God to have the determination to build this habit into the lives of our kids, from the start. I see the fruit of our efforts in their lives. At the time of this recording, my three oldest children are young adults, one of them already married and a father (that makes ME Grand-pop!). The LORD led us to integrate daily time with the LORD into their lives from the time they were able to hold a book. The results have been nothing short of amazing. Today, each of them engages in their own relational time with the LORD in a genuine, life-giving way. It happens at least in part, because they started the habit of setting aside the time to be with the LORD, early in life.

If you'd like to hear more about that, from their own lips, you can at ChristianHomeandFamily.com/73

The scriptures are full of attitudes that are supposed to be true of believers in Christ. From generosity, to kindness, to humility, the scriptures make it clear that all of us are fully dependent on the Spirit of God to produce those things deep down in our souls. But as parents, we can have a significant impact on our children's growth in those areas from before the time they are born.

Yes, I said from before the time they are born. So the first thing you should do is begin praying for God to fill them with His Spirit, so that they can then demonstrate the fruit of the Spirit. We began praying for each of our children the moment we knew my wife was pregnant. Once we knew if they were boy or girl (yes, we did find out), we gave them a name and began praying for them by name... all before they sucked in their first breath of oxygen. I believe it had a significant impact on who they are and God's work in their lives.

Once they were born, we did a number of things to encourage godly attitudes.

First, we made sure that we, the parents, were working on improving those attitudes in our own lives. If you preach one thing and do another, you'll find rebellion rising up in the heart of your kids. For more on that, see episode 70 of this podcast, at ChristianHomeandFamily.com/70.

Next, we worked hard not to underestimate our kids' capacity for absorbing the truth of God. We read scripture to them, found scripture-filled children's music for them, and talked about what the songs and stories were saying. Parent's, don't underestimate the Spirit's power through the word of God. He is able to drench your child with Himself from an early age. John the Baptist was filled with the Spirit in his mother's womb (Luke 1:15). Why couldn't your child be significantly shaped by the Spirit from an early age too?

Once our kids were old enough to carry on a conversation, no matter how elementary, we started practicing a number of additional things...

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• We talked about desirable godly attitudes in positive terms.
• We pointed out people who were doing a good job at allowing the Spirit to produce His fruit.
• We read them stories of admirable Christians who could serve as role models.
• We discussed desired traits repeatedly, covering why the trait in question was so important and what God thought about the issue.
• We worked as a family to memorize scriptures that taught about the godly traits we were encouraging.
• Once they were old enough to understand the word "no" and what it meant (around 1 year old), we began requiring them to behave in godly ways, even applying discipline when needed, as the scriptures encourage parents to do.

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Now don't misunderstand, we weren't heavy-handed or stern with our kids. Everything was drenched in love and acceptance, and taught in a spirit of dependence on God to help them do what they were expected to do.

All of this was based on the belief that God will use our efforts as parents as some of the means by which He develops them into the people He wants them to be. My belief is that part of the effectiveness comes from getting our kids started down a path of thinking rightly about godly attitudes and actions, early in life. We're helping them, guiding them, with the help of the Spirit of God, to develop their own godly habits in the areas of thinking and behavior.

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If you'd like to engage with me directly about this topic, please feel free to do so in the comments below.

The Christian Home and Family ministry is aimed at helping you develop a legacy of faith in your family that lasts for generations to come. If I can help you toward that end in any way, please contact me.

I also invite you to join the CHAF facebook community.

Finally, if you would take a few minutes to help spread the word about Christian Home and Family, I believe God would be honored. Go to here to find all the ways you can help.

This episode is brought to you by my men's event... The Understanding Way Weekend for Christan Husbands. You can find out more at www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/uww

There is a lot of joking that happens surrounding the differences between men and women, mainly because the differences are very real. We men see things differently, experience things differently, and think about things differently than our wives do - and as a result, all kinds of things can happen.

Confusion. Conflicts. Disagreements. Even divorce.

But guys, I'm here to tell you that those don't have to be the outcome for your marriage. There is a whole lot you can do to make a tremendous difference in your marriage.

The ones where the princess is in mortal danger and the knight in shining armor rides in to save the day? Those types of stories resonate with people for a reason: They demonstrate how God has wired us as men and women.

Every woman I've ever met, regardless of her background, WANTS her man to treasure her like one of those damsels in distress... not because she's egotistical, but because she NEEDS that kind of devotion from the man in her life. It's how God has wired her.

The Apostle Paul said it this way...

However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband. (Ephesians 5:33).

You may respond, "There's nothing in there that says my wife NEEDS me to treasure her!" - and I'll admit, Paul never uses those words. But stop for a second and think it through...

WHY would God give husbands the command to love their lives as much as they love themselves? The answer? Because their wives NEED that kind of love.

In fact, a few verses earlier, we're told,

In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ
does the church. (Ephesians 5:28-29).

Notice the words Paul uses there... nourishes, cherishes... those are words of deep concern and great care. Those are the ways a husband is supposed to love his wife... because she NEEDS that kind of love.

So... back to you and your wife: Your wife WANTS you to be her hero. She wants to matter so much to you, that you would put yourself at risk to save her, if needed. She WANTS to have confidence that you love her, and always will, no matter what.

That is what gives your wife security in your relationship. It's what fuels her emotional/relational fires. It's what enables her to fully trust you.

I can't tell you the number of guys I've counseled who don't get this and wonder why their marriage is in such a mess. Doesn't it just make sense that if your wife doesn't feel loved and cherished, she's not going to trust you in other areas? Doesn't it make sense that if she's not confident of your care for her, she's going to have a hard time following your leadership?

delight in your wife.

Here's two practical suggestions:

Learn to view her as a treasure:

Consider this reality: Your wife is the life partner your God has given to you, and He gives the very BEST gifts. Now, depending on what you've gone through with your wife, it may take you a bit of time to get your head around that one. There could be a lot of hurt between you, a lot of wrong she's done toward you that makes it hard to view her as a treasure. But guys, a lot of what she's become may be at least partly your doing, by not treasuring her as you should have. God gave her to you to be a help to you, an asset, a benefit to your life. She is a personal gift from the all-powerful God. That means she is a treasure.

Learn to treat her like a treasure - every day.

Think for a second about your car, or your hunting rifle, or your favorite sports team. When something is extremely valuable to you, you take care of it. You check up on it. You follow through to make sure it's in good repair. You seek to know the most up to date information about it.

What if that "thing" is not a thing at all, but a person - like your wife? You do the same kinds of things. You find out how she's really doing, every day. You show interest in her and what's important to her. You make sure she has everything she needs in order to be healthy and happy. You make her concerns your own. You listen, you care, you nurture, you cherish.

Guys, the truth is, your wife is more important than your work, your hobbies, your car, your friends... and she should be cared for accordingly. It may not be natural for you to do those things, and they may even feel a bit awkward at first, but those are the kinds of "lay down your life" sacrifices you are called to make.

In that same passage, Paul says,

Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. (Ephesians 5:25)

Jesus is your example, so as a man of God, as a follower of Jesus, it's time for you to man-up. Make it your greatest ambition in life to glorify God by learning how to delight in your wife.

As a result, you'll see all kinds of benefits in your relationship, your family, your parenting, and in your life as a whole.

Parents of adolescents, older teens, and adult children can often view the trajectory of their child's life with great concern because they can see the disaster that bad choices are bringing. Is there anything a parent can do to divert their child from a life of terrible consequences?

In this episode of the podcast, I'm going to give every parent two things they can do that will help them move into their child's life in a positive way, to help gently steer them into healthier directions. There is no guarantee, but with God's help, you can move toward your child with positive, loving concern that can have a positive impact on their future.

This podcast is part 2 of a conversation I had with my children 2 years ago about how the LORD has faithfully led them to seek Him through the habit of personal quiet time. As you'll hear, none of them are perfect at it, and none of them feels they have a walk with the LORD totally wired. But each of them has their own genuine relationship with Christ and loves that they do. My prayer (and theirs) is that you'll be blessed and better equipped to help your children grow into a genuine, vibrant relationship with Jesus that will fuel their lives for the equipping of the next generation.

Every Christian parent I know wants their children to learn how to walk closely with the LORD. We know how important it is to maintain a vibrant relationship with God as an adult, and want it for our kids too.

In this episode of the Christian Home and Family podcast, which is quite a bit longer than my normal episodes... I'm going to be having a conversation with three great young folks - my three oldest kids, Aaron, Melinda, and Madeline. This conversation was recorded almost two years ago, and is a "repeat performance" of the Christian Home and Family podcast (originally aired as episode 4). The reason I'm doing a repeat episode is because this is one of the most downloaded and listened to episodes in the history of the podcast, and I have many new listeners since the time it originally aired. I want everyone to benefit from the great work God has done in these three kids... and I pray it will be a great blessing to you! Hear the story of three great teens about how they developed the habit of personal time with God.

For years we've been told that our children have a fragile, but incredibly valuable sense of self-esteem, and that if we aren't careful, we could damage it beyond repair. As a result many attempts have been made in educational theories, parenting philosophies, and other areas, to bolster and build up a child's sense of self worth.

1 Contests and sports where "everybody is a winner." Everyone gets a trophy, even if they never won a game, scored a goal, or even played in a game. In my thinking, the only thing that approach accomplishes is to convince our kids that they don't have to work hard to accomplish anything, it will all be handed to them just for participating.
2 Teachers are afraid to fail kids who are not achieving the level of academic proficiency needed in order to advance to the next subject. So amazingly, children are getting into high school without even being able to read and comprehend what they read. What's that accomplishing besides the dumbing down of society?

3 Kids are told, "You can be whatever you want to be," which is clearly untrue. Each of us is wired, designed, and gifted differently. No matter how much my 13 year old son wants to play basketball like LeBron James, he's never going to because he doesn't have the height or the athletic skill for it.

In my view, it's been a disaster. The generation of children who are moving into adulthood at this time are some of the most self-centered, "the world owes me" minded individuals I've ever met. Of course, there are exceptions, but overall, I believe my statement is true.

Low self esteem is NOT your child's problem, pride is. . Ninety percent of people in the world don't struggle with thinking too little of themselves, they struggle with the exact opposite - thinking too highly of
themselves. Jesus was very clear on this…

Mark 7:21-23 "What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person."

So what am I suggesting, that we beat down our kids, tell them what rotten, no-good sinners they are, and make sure they feel absolutely terrible about themselves?

Our children need to have a right, truth-based perspective about who they are. The Apostle Paul says it this way…

Romans 12:3 - For by the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith that God has assigned.

What Paul is saying is this…

1 - We, and our children, don't need a pep talk to tell us how great we are. What we need is a dose of reality that enables us to see how pitiful and needy we are without the grace of God. Notice Paul's language… he says we're to think about ourselves with "sober" judgment. In other words, we are not to be like a drunkard who can't see the world or himself clearly. As believers in Christ, we can't continue to drink the wine of
self-esteem and fall into the drunken stupor of thinking we are the best thing going. We, and our children, need to understand that we are sinners.

I know that sounds pretty depressing, and it would be if not for the grace of God. Notice the last part of what Paul said…

"think with sober judgment, each according to the measure of faith God has assigned."

Paul is telling us that God has been gracious to provide us the opportunity to have faith in Jesus, and that changes everything. When we place our entire trust in Jesus Christ, all of our sinful shame and inner rot,
is laid on the cross with Jesus. He takes our sinful being and in exchange, He gives us His holy, righteous self. We are acceptable before God, not because we are something special, but because Jesus did something special for us. At the end of this life, every Christian, from Billy Graham to the most unknown, believing person on the planet, will ride into eternity on the coat-tails of Jesus.

So, we, and our children, need to know…

1. We are sinners in need of a Savior.
2. Because God is love, He has given us a Savior - Jesus Christ.
3. Any good that comes of our lives, Jesus does.

The result of knowing these two truths is a humble, God-fearing, people-loving individual who is able to learn and apply things like self-control, consideration, and service to others.

I'm available for speaking on this and other topics. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/speaking

I also provide life coaching, spiritual coaching services. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/coaching

Find products from Christian Home and Family at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/store

It was in a restaurant, at a ball game, or in the store. A parent was being held hostage by a 3 year old, or a ten year old, or a seventeen year old. The tantrums, moody attitudes, screams when the parent tries to do something for the child's good, and overall disrespectful attitudes showed to everyone who was unfortunate enough to have to witness the event, that the child AND the parent were out of control. We were the one unfortunate enough to be witnessing a scenario just like that once, long ago, when my oldest son was just 3 years old. It was at Chili's and a few tables away, a 5 year old boy was dominating his parents something terrible. The fits, food throwing, and disrespect was so thick you could feel it. My son sat in his high chair, saliva dripping out of his open mouth, right onto his chicken nuggets. He was only 3, but even he knew something wasn't right. With eyes wide he turned to us and said, "That boy need a panking." So, what are we to think of this case study? Let's consider what the scriptures have to say. Did you know that the Bible only gives 2 commands that are specifically directed at children? The first is found in both Colossians 6:12 and Ephesians 3:20. It says… Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

It's HUGE. And it's the part of a child's responsibility toward their parents that most parents focus on. WE work hard to make sure our kids are doing what they're told, that they are following our household rules and standards, that they are doing their chore chart and not hitting their little sister. Obedience is important, and we should focus on it as parents. BUT, if it's all we're focusing on, we run the risk of being the parent in the scenario we just described. The second command directly given to children was initially given in Exodus 20:12 and is reiterated 7 more times in the scriptures, and 6 of those in the New Testament. Here it is… Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be long in the land that the LORD your God is giving you.

What exactly IS honor as it applies to parents? It's not that our children need to bow down every time we enter the room. It's not that they are to serve us like a slave. It's not that our word is next to the word of God in significance and they have no room to question it. As parents, we are fallen, fallible human beings, just like our children are, and it's good for us to keep that in mind. What honor means for a child is this: They are to understand and humbly submit to this fact: Parents are God's appointed authority over their children. They represent God's authority and guidance and wisdom over the child. So, when a child rebels against his or her parents, they are rebelling against the authority God Himself has established for their good. Dishonor toward parents is dishonor toward God. Honor is manifested through respect. It's about attitude. It's about valuing the provision, protection, and guidance that God Himself has put over them, through their parents. THAT is the child's responsibility, and it's not one that comes naturally. That means that parents are responsible to teach their children about honor. That's where it gets tough for some of us. Parents often wonder, "How can I teach my child to honor me, without sounding like a self-serving jerk?" It's a good question, and it deserves a solid answer.

FIRST, make sure you start early, teaching your kids from a very early age what God says about their responsibility toward you, as their parent. Here's the key: Lean on God's authority. Show your children that God says it is right for them to honor you, and that it pleases Him when they do.

SECOND, Make sure they know what "honor" means, in practical terms. They could memorize the Bible verse, "Honor your father and mother," but if they don't understand what it MEANS to honor you, they won't be able to do it. So… as a parent, do YOU know what "honor" means, in practical terms? It might be easier to consider from the standpoint of what dishonor looks like. Dishonor is seen primarily in attitudes, and attitudes are often revealed in things like…

Facial expressions - rolling the eyes, looks of disinterest

Audible sounds - heavy sighs, sounds of indignation, whining, screaming, telling you "no"

Body language - stomping the foot, tantrums,

These and a thousand other things communicate disrespect, dishonor toward you as a parent. You cannot allow those things. The child should be disciplined for those things just as much as if they directly disobeyed you. Some parents have a hard time with that, because it can be much less tangible of a thing to detect. But you have to learn to discern bad attitudes and discipline your children for them. If you don't, they will learn that they are allowed to disrespect you, which will perpetuate disrespectful attitudes all the more.

So, some scenarios:

1 You're trying to put your child's coat on and they scream in rebellion. That's dishonor. You should not allow it.

2 You tell the child they cannot go to their friend's house. They whine and beg and plead… they might even threaten. That is dishonor. You should not allow it.

3  You insist on your teenager being home at a reasonable hour, and they stomp their foot, loudly insist that you're unfair, and roll their eyes. That's dishonor. You should not allow it.

Disrespect and the rebellion that flows from it are serious matters. You wouldn't allow your child to get into witchcraft, or spiritism, or divination, would you? Then why would you allow them to harbor a rebellious attitude? The scriptures equate those two things: 1 Samuel 15:23 - For rebellion is as the sin of divination

Allowing your children to disrespect you is allowing them to do something that is BAD FOR THEM. It's letting them wander into a danger zone, where nothing but harm can come from it.

I'm available for speaking on this and other topics. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/speaking

I also provide life coaching, spiritual coaching services. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/coaching

Find products from Christian Home and Family at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/store

Most kids who go off the deep end, into a season or rebellion, do so for one reason. They see the rules and restrictions that authorities place on them as personal attacks rather than loving means of protection…
and THAT is the problem of the authorities in their lives, not the kids.

Another way I often say it is this: Rules without relationship, creates rebellion.

Rules are not a bad thing. Because human beings are fallen creatures, we need rules to show us right and wrong, and to govern and guide the direction of our countries and organizations. I strongly advocate that families develop their own set of household rules, the non-negotiable expectations that everyone in the family is expected to buy into, for the sake of representing Jesus well.

But when it comes to household rules that a family has, there's a key component that makes them much more effective and helpful to everyone in the home.

What is that key component? Relationship.

In Proverbs 23:26, we find this intriguing phrase, "My son, give me your heart, and let your eyes observe my ways.

There is a heart-connection that is supposed to exist between parents and children. As the verse implies, our children are to be willing to give their hearts to us. But parents, that's not something that happens
by default. The way you nurture and build the relationship you have with your children has everything to do with it.

If you lay down the law to your kids, but are distant or removed in terms of relationship, you are writing your very own prescription for disaster. In time, and not much of it, your kids will resent your rules rather than embrace them. That's because there is no sense in which you've communicated a loving, concerned, "interested-in-them attitude" that demonstrates that the rules you're laying down are more than just rules.

I've seen rebellion for this reason take place in the heart of a three year old, a twelve year old, and even a thirty year old. It happens because the kind of relationship you establish with your children is
based ONLY on authority. You're nothing more than a figurehead, and as a result, they will begin to buck your rules in favor of their own opinion of what is right and wrong.

First, you start young. From the time your children are born, don't let a day go by without you showing concern for them, asking questions about the things churning around inside of them, and giving them an
understanding that you place rules and boundaries into their lives for their protection… because you love them so much!

Second, make the relationship you have with your kids the kind that shows them that you are truly interested in the, that you genuinely care for them as people. It's not about "I'm the parent, you have to do what I say." It's about, "I care for you more than anyone else in the whole world, and I want to know and understand you. I like you. I'm eager to know you." You do that by having caring conversations with them, showing genuine interest in them and the things that are happening in their lives. Resist the temptation to sidestep or sluff off their "childish" interests because you're busy with more important things. Know this: Almost NOTHING is more important than building the right kind of relationship with your kids. Third, keep at it, day after day after day. Don't let the busy-ness and stress of life cause you to focus on less important things than the health of the relationships within your own home. Too many parents wake up one day to find that their teenage daughter or son has long been distant from them, and that the road to
recovering their heart is going to be a painful and rocky one. Avoid that parents, please.

I'm available for speaking on this and other topics. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/speaking

I also provide life coaching, spiritual coaching services. Find out more at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/coaching

Find products from Christian Home and Family at http://www.ChristianHomeandFamily.com/store

Let me be clear. I LOVE the Bible. I believe it to be God's word, divinely inspired, and profitable for our instruction, edification, and teaching. I can't tell you how much I have grown because of the truths the scriptures contain. I read it every single day of my life.

BUT, I also know, from personal experience, that a head full of Bible verses can be a very damaging thing. You can know what the scriptures say, and have it do absolutely no good in your life. Memorizing scripture, by itself, is not enough.

You can enroll them in AWANAs or Pioneer Club, or Child Evangelism Fellowship, (all very wonderful organizations, by the way), and you could encourage your kids to memorize all the Bible verses in the world, but if you don't do one, vital thing, it won't help them one tiny, little bit.

What is it you've got to do?

Picture a bible verse or a passage of scripture like a suitcase. You want to open up that verse or passage, and unpack all the nuggets of truth it contains. You want to walk through it, word by word, phrase by phrase, to make sure your kids are understanding, on their level, what the verse is actually SAYING.

That can be a very hard thing to do, can't it.

I'm a busy man. I've got soccer to get the kids to, and work to do every day, and housework and chores, and meals to prepare, and friends to see, and groceries to buy, and homeschooling to do, and a hunting trip I'm planning for, and a men's group at church, and honestly, I don't have time to sit down with my kids between every Sunday school class or weekly AWANA meeting and help them understand the verses they're being asked to memorize!

Wait a minute.

I hope you see how ridiculous that sounds. To believe, even for a second, that you're too busy to help your children understand God's word, is like saying you're too busy to breathe. It's like saying that all those activities and responsibilities that make up your life are more important than your children's eternal well being and spiritual health. It's ridiculous.

So, how do you do it? How do you help your kids unpack the Bible verses they're getting week after week after week?

FIRST - You've got to reassess your life. If you have so many things going on, individually or as a family, that you can't sit down for 15 to 20 minutes with your children, once a week, so that you can review and talk about their Bible memory lessons, you are WAY too busy. Something has got to go. I know that sounds radical, but Jesus is a radical Savior. He doesn't just want your kids to know what His word says, He wants them to UNDERSTAND what it MEANS and how it applies to their young lives. So, if making the time for this seems overwhelming, that's a good sign that you've got too much on your plate. Unload some things for the sake
of your kids.

SECOND - Do it. As you help the kids review their verses, stop and discuss each phrase in its logical sequence.

Here's an example: If the verse says, "God so loved the world that He gave His only Son," stop and talk about who God is - their Creator, King, and Ruler. Help them understand what the verse means when it refers to "the world." Is that them, grandma, the boy down the street? Unpack what it means that God "gave" His Son, by describing the incredibly powerful loving act it was for Jesus to step out of heaven and become a human being. And behind all that, help your kids understand why God needed to give us anything in the first place. Help your children understand their own sin, and how it separates them from God. Help them understand their own need for God. Show them how His great heart of love motivated Him to do the most amazing, sacrificial thing ever, to overcome their sin problem and make them His own.

That's just one example. And the Bible has hundreds of thousands of verses in it, all with their own deeply impacting, eternally significant meaning. If you let your kids cram the words into their heads without the meaning, your feeding them food without the nutrients, and it will wind up destroying them. They'll become confident that they know the scriptures, when they really only know the words. They'll become self-righteous little hypocrites instead of passionate followers of Christ.

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