Citizens Of Nowhere

Nick and Carey are joined by Kirsty Newton to talk about Boris Johnson, the frontrunner in the Tory leadership race and, therefore, the most likely next British Prime Minister.

Recently, police were called to the flat of Johnson's girlfriend, Carrie Symonds, following a domestic disturbance. They were alerted by a neighbour, who also recorded the audio of the incident and then sent the recording the the Guardian newspaper. Nick and Carey discuss the rights and wrongs of all this, and the subsequent fallout - predictably split along tribal lines - with their guest, the brilliant Kirsty Newton.

Kirsty is a musician, improviser, musical director and comedy performer (as in, a comedian but not a stand-up comic). She's performed with Rich Hall, Phil Nichol, Arthur Smith, Mitch Benn, the Comedy Store Players, and most recently toured the UK and Ireland with Paul Merton's Impro Chums. In her spare time, she's married to Nick.

Along the way, they slightly despair of how someone so unsuited to power is about to get as much as they could ever want, and discuss the effects of private schooling on privilege and inequality.

Oh, and there's a very silly bit where Kirsty tries to make a theme tune with a big roll of cardboard.

A bit of a sprawling episode, this, eventually getting round to the question: Is it ok to throw milkshake at your enemies? And, with regard to the fuss about some recent comments by Jo Brand, is it ok to joke about throwing battery acid instead?

Along the way, we talk about trying out new material (Nick's just done his first Edinburgh Festival preview) and how surprisingly up-for-it an audience can be, even for very potentially divisive material (in this case, the question, 'Are trans women real women?').

Carey has a horrible cold in this episode, so pleases wash your hands after listening.

These are strange times, whether you've already been born, haven't been born yet, or have died but are technically still Prime Minister.

In this episode, we cover:

How to set up a room for comedy; how Donald Trump is like a stand-up comedian; having a ghost Prime Minister; the Tory leadership election; citizens' juries (aka citizens’ assemblies); religious people's rights over their kids' education and, finally, abortion.

In recent weeks, abortion rights have come under intense legislative attack in several US states. Less recently, Ireland finally managed to repeal its anti-abortion 8th amendment, following a citizens' assembly and a referendum.

It's one of the most emotively divisive subjects in social policy - one where both sides are able to see the other as actually evil.

Nick comes to this subject from the position of being a pro-choice atheist from a staunchly anti-abortion, religious family, and tends to think both sides talk past each other. So there's that angle, in case the prospect of two childless men discussing what they think about abortion wasn't enough to hook you in...

Is the Earth flat? No. So why do some people think it is?

Nick and Carey watch the documentary 'Behind the Curve' so you don't have to (although feel free to; it's quite entertaining). It turns out they already know one of the people featured in it.

Why do some people hold completely false beliefs? What can be done about it? Should anything be done? Does it really matter?

Nick's in London for a moment, so he and Carey take the opportunity to record an episode, this time about Danny Baker's unfortunate tweet of a picture of a chimp, titled 'The Royal Baby'. Let's be clear: neither of us think it was a good idea, but the ensuing storm and his incredibly quick sacking by the BBC are an interesting model of how quickly and unforgivingly the social media outrage machine operates.

Is is possible to be accidentally racist? If you are, does that make you a racist? Are words or images racist in themselves, or does the intent matter? And if intent doesn't matter, where does that leave us?

If you find these questions interesting, and think that listening to two stand-up comics discuss them in an unplanned way will enlighten you, then this is the episode for you.

This episode contains language that some listeners may find offensive (there's a C-word each, and also an N-word each, with context, which shouldn't need to be said , but there we are).

Carey's back from Australia, the land of not-good-enough-internet-to-remotely-record-a-podcast. No planned topic for this episode; it’s just a catch-up. We talk about audiences, Australia, America (Nick's been to America), and whether you'd rather be laughed at by men or women.

It's another guest episode!

This time, Nick and Carey are joined by comedian, writer and ex-housemate, Matt Kirshen, and 'industry insider' Holly Gabrielson, who are on a trip over from L.A.

We kick off by talking about the etiquette of '@-including' artists when you criticise their work on social media (don't), and the painful whining that met Greg Jenner when he gently pointed this out on Twitter last week. We also talk about learning history in different countries, and trying to write topical comedy in America in the Trump era.

This week's theme song is written and performed by Matt Kirshen. All rights reserved.

If you want to peruse, Greg Jenner’s original tweet and its replies can be found here: https://twitter.com/greg_jenner/status/1079353068993560577 But if you don’t like it, don’t bother telling him.

The UK's Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) has announced new guidelines for advertising content. From next year, 'harmful gender stereotypes' will be banned. Nick and Carey talk about this, and about the 'research' behind it. 'Research' is in quote marks there because the ASA's 'public consultation' isn't, as the ASA claims, academic literature that evidentially demonstrates 'harm', but more like a marketing survey that asks people what they think. Nick gets pretty exasperated with this.

We’re not sure if you can swear in these descriptions, but both Nick and Carey drop the C-bomb during this episode. I hate the phrase ‘drop the C-bomb’, but if the actual word is so offensive that you need warning about it, I suppose I probably shouldn’t reproduce it here.

If you want to go down the rabbit-hole yourself, here's the starting point, with the other docs linked at the bottom: https://www.asa.org.uk/news/new-rule-to-ban-harmful-gender-stereotypes-next-year.html

It's Christmas! Well, nearly. Nick and Carey decide to find a quiet spot in Central London to record an episode. This turns out to be impossible, so they end up standing in the cold in the gardens of the Royal College of Physicians, where they talk about awful Christmas gigs and what it's like to lose your religion (if you're Nick).

Apologies for the hiatus! Usually we'd put something like, 'Nick and Carey manage to get hold of Dave Gorman and grab an interview, etc.' but it would be more accurate to say, 'Carey manages to grab Nick and Dave' as Nick's been supporting Dave on tour for the past 3 months. It's not a long episode, recorded as it is in the dressing rooms, pre-show at the Royal Festival Hall, but Dave is, as ever, interesting, analytical and funny. Among other things, we discuss how Dave developed the genre that leads to other shows being described as 'Gormanesque', moving from the club circuit to doing your own thing, and Dave's favourite complaint from the previous tour.