What’s up, sinners? Welcome to Episode 08 of Clothesline, the lighthearted, dark-humoured podcast about growing up in cults.

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture.

In this episode, we expand on some additional thoughts Chris had following our prior conversation in Episode 07 about Calvinism. That related to a journal entry of theirs from age 19 during a crisis of faith, which also tied into a conversation Syd had with a family member who has trouble advocating for themselves. The root of it all? Fear.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* The Calvinist dilemma: to treat everyone like saints, or conversion projects?

* Chris’s journal entry from 2012 during a final attempt at committing to their faith of origin

* How this belief system is built on a foundation of fear and control

* Why advocating for ourselves is scary, and an example from Syd’s work on film sets of why “staying small” cannot be an option

* “The Clothesline of Sin” and #HeathenPartyMode

* An exciting announcement about an upcoming collaboration with Jacob from the Ex Homeschoolers Club!

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? All our links are below, or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

Subscribe to us on Substack:

Support Clothesline on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/ClotheslinePod

Chris’s Substack:

Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen):

Chris’s other links:

https://xcjumperx.carrd.co/

Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative All of Syd’s links:

https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

Disclaimer: This episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

We’re simply here to share our stories and talk about these things in a very real and human way.

Our intention is for you to feel less alone, less crazy, and more supported.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

What’s up, sinners? Welcome to Episode 06 of Clothesline, the lighthearted, dark-humoured podcast about growing up in cults.

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture.

In this episode, we talk about growing up with Calvinist principles (namely TULIP and predestination), free will, and how we felt totally clueless when we left the church and lost that framework we’d always had.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* What is TULIP? Syd introduces Chris to these principles. Chris did not like.

* Predestination (make it make sense)

* Free will (HEATHEN PARTY MODE)

* Cats (how could we not?)

* Gaslighting ourselves (still) about leaving the church and how the world suddenly seemed so…open

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? All our links are below, or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

Subscribe to us on Substack:

Support Clothesline on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/ClotheslinePod

Chris’s Substack:

Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen):

Chris’s other links:

https://xcjumperx.carrd.co/

Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative All of Syd’s links:

https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

Disclaimer: This episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

What’s up, sinners? Welcome to Episode 06 of Clothesline, the lighthearted, dark-humoured podcast about growing up in cults.

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture.

In this episode, we talk about our inner children, inner teens, and mitigate the heaviness by reminiscing about Christian emo rock music and other gems of that bygone era.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* Struggling with bitterness against our teenage selves

* Performing devotion to our faith by forcing ourselves into a state of spiritual psychosis and waiting to feel like everyone else

* Missionary tendencies

* Being the oldest siblings: was that a way to experience a childhood we didn’t get?

* Memory gaps in childhood causing us to gaslight ourselves

* Chris’s kitten, Connie, being impossibly adorable (if you’re watching)

* Which Christian rock band did Syd see in concert as a teenager?

* What is the meaning of HEATHEN PARTY MODE?

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? All our links are below, or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

Subscribe to us on Substack:

Support Clothesline on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/ClotheslinePod

Chris’s Substack:

Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen):

Chris’s other links: https://xcjumperx.carrd.co/

Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreativeAll of Syd’s links:https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

Disclaimer: This episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

Welcome to Episode 05 of Clothesline, the lighthearted, dark-humoured podcast about growing up in cults.

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture.

In this episode, we define the words “cult” and “evangelical” and how we relate to our past indoctrinated selves.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* How parents and leaders deify themselves within these strict belief systems

* How a doctrine of control affected us as the oldest AFAB children

* The time Syd was roped into an evangelical brainstorming session

* The BITE model for determining cult-like behaviours

* Which Christian kids’ movie Chris watched on mushrooms

* How thought control has stuck with us, even until now

* The realization Chris had at Oral Roberts University

* Haughtiness and performative dedication to the church

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? Hit us up on Threads (links below) or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

* Chris’s Substack: https://crisiscorner.substack.com/

* Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen): https://picklesandvodka.substack.com/

* All Chris’s other links: http://xcjumperx.carrd.co

* Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative

* All of Syd’s links: https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

* Subscribe to us on Substack: https://clotheslinepod.substack.com/

Disclaimer: this episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

Welcome to Episode 04 of the Clothesline podcast!

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture. This is where we talk about it in a lighthearted, dark-humoured way.

In this episode, we talk about harm reduction, what it means, and how it relates to purity culture and evangelicalism.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* Explaining the meaning of harm reduction as a practice/philosophy

* How harm reduction connects to binary language and mindsets

* Updates and expansions on the previous episode about parental relationships, and how harm reduction can be used for navigating those relationships, too

* Reminiscing about the times other people knew we were queer before we did

* Has evangelicalism’s system of thought spread to other secular areas of culture, particularly with drugs and alcohol?

* As usual, being endearingly awkward at the beginning and end of the episode

* Anatomy lessons from Laverne Cox

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? Hit us up on Threads (links below) or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

* Chris’s Substack: https://crisiscorner.substack.com/

* Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen): https://picklesandvodka.substack.com/

* All Chris’s other links: http://xcjumperx.carrd.co

* Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative

* All of Syd’s links: https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

* Subscribe to us on Substack: https://clotheslinepod.substack.com/

Disclaimer: this episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

Welcome to Episode 03 of the Clothesline podcast!

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture. This is where we talk about it in a lighthearted, dark-humoured way.

In this episode, we have a raw, meaningful conversation about what our relationships with our parents look like after leaving the church—and a bit about what they looked like when we were kids being raised in a strict belief system.

Some of the topics in this episode include:

* The confusion of wanting to be close to our parents, but not being able to

* Chris navigating a shifting relationship with their parents as their self-expression gets stronger

* Syd coming out as nonbinary to their parents as an answer to being asked “Why won’t you come to church with us?”

* The deification of parents in fundamentalist cults, like the ones we grew up in

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? Hit us up on Threads (links below) or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

* Chris’s Substack: https://crisiscorner.substack.com/

* Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen): https://picklesandvodka.substack.com/

* All Chris’s other links: http://xcjumperx.carrd.co

* Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative

* All of Syd’s links: https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

* Subscribe to us on Substack: https://clotheslinepod.substack.com/

Disclaimer: this episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

Welcome to Episode 02 of the Clothesline podcast!

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture. This is where we talk about it in an imperfect, human, raw, and fun way—somehow all at the same time.

In this episode, we expand on our introductions from the first episode so you get more of the lore.

Some of the topics covered in this episode include:

* Intuition and how we were taught not to trust ourselves

* How this brainwashed self-distrust affects our mental health and different forms of self-harm

* Maintaining a relationship with our parents: to perform and keep it shallow, or to try to go deeper and risk estrangement?

* How Syd’s grandmother reacted to the Ellen show

* How Syd’s mother reacted to a gay kiss in The Walking Dead

* Being forced to watch A Baby Story and how our parents fast-forwarded spicy scenes in movies

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? Hit us up on Threads (links below) or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies!

As promised, here are the links:

* Chris’s Substack: https://crisiscorner.substack.com/

* Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen): https://www.instagram.com/picklesandvodkapodcast/ AND https://picklesandvodka.substack.com/

* All of Chris’s other links: http://xcjumperx.carrd.co

* Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative

* All of Syd’s links: https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

* Subscribe to us on Substack: https://clotheslinepod.substack.com/

Disclaimer: this episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com

Welcome to the first episode of the long-awaited Clothesline podcast!

We’re Chris and Syd, two nonbinary people in their 30s who grew up homeschooled in fundamentalist evangelical Christian purity culture.

And we’re airing out ALL the dirty laundry.

This is a chaotic, fun, lighthearted, and meaningful first episode, where we introduce ourselves to you and give you a little background on why we decided to start this project.

Some of the topics covered in this episode include:

* Who we are and why we started this project

* What kind of church Chris would be attending in the outfit they were wearing during this recording

* Growing up in a big family with a parent who worked for Bill Gothard, the founder of the Institute in Basic Life Principles

* Weird chants we’d say after the before-meal prayer, including a song about Johnny Appleseed (yes, he was real)

* What it was like going to a classroom for the first time at university

* Getting off on reading Christian-based movie reviews (thanks, Focus on the Family)

* Modesty, and what that meant for our families

* What flavour of Presbyterianism we both grew up in

…and more.

Wanna talk to us? Hit Syd up on Threads (link below) or email us at [email protected].

Spread Clothesline’s Good News by sharing this episode with your buddies! If you want to go the extra mile, support us on Patreon and get access to bonus content.

As promised, here are the links:

* Chris’s Substack: http://crisiscorner.substack.com

* Chris’s other podcast, Pickles and Vodka: A Mental Health Podcast (available wherever you listen): http://picklesandvodka.substack.com AND http://www.instagram.com/picklesandvodkapodcast

* All of Chris’s other links: http://xcjumperx.carrd.co

* Follow Syd on Threads: https://www.threads.com/@houseghostcreative

* All of Syd’s links: https://houseghostcreative.carrd.co/

* Subscribe to us on Substack: http://clotheslinepod.substack.com

Disclaimer: this episode includes conversations about things like religious trauma, mental health, abuse, and other topics like that.

We aren’t doctors or psychologists. This podcast is not intended to give official advice or anything serious.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit clotheslinepod.substack.com