Here’s me saying in all my honesty and vulnerability: I got 99 problems and commitment is all of them.

When we hear the word commitment, we often immediately think about monogamy and relationships -- but my commitment issues run much deeper than monogamy and across a wider range.

All my life, I’ve been first to abandon myself and last to commit to myself. Every time I’ve started to focus on myself, I’ve quickly been swayed by the first shiny person or opportunity to come my way.

This pattern of non-commitment has bled into many facets of my life: romantic partnerships, platonic relationships, and professional opportunities. I’ve had a string of failed situationships, multiple new best friends, and incredibly short-lived work opportunities. Which makes absolute sense on this side of self-awareness: how was I going to be successful at committing to anything and anybody else if i wasn’t even able to commit to my own damn self?

Brown Girl Guilt is the first time I’ve acknowledged my own bullshit and given myself a time out. In this time out, I’m only allowed to commit to myself, that which is most aligned for me, and really ask myself if the person I want to date, the friendship I want to maintain, or the job I am saying yes contributes to my overall spiritual growth.

In this episode, I chat with one of my best friends and soul mates, Rumneek Johal on what her relationship has been like with commitment, how she’s navigating patterns of self-abandonment, and learning from this beautiful angel how I can continue to better commit to myself.

Like BGG? Connect with us on Instagram @_browngirlguilt or www.browngirlguilt.com