Compassionate Accountability Podcast

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Parker J. Palmer. He is a legendary writer, traveler, teacher, and activist who has dedicated his life to understanding and promoting an authentic and practical kind of compassion: his magnificent paper, The Gift of Presence. The Perils of Advice highlights the common mistake of trying to help people when they often only need our presence.

In today’s conversation, Parker shares his views about our culture and democracy, how leaders can avoid burnout, and a simple practice for building resilient communities at the beginning of every staff meeting.

About Parker J. Palmer:

Parker J. Palmer is the founder and Senior Partner Emeritus at the Center for Courage and Renewal. He holds a Ph.D. in sociology from the University of California at Berkeley, thirteen honorary doctorates, two Distinguished Achievement Awards from the National Educational Press Association, and an Award of Excellence from the Associated Church Press. 

Palmer is the author of ten books, including several award-winning titles, that have sold nearly two million copies and been translated into ten languages.

Key Takeaways:

[3:29] Parker talks about the purpose and mission of the  Center of Courage and Renewal.

[6:02] Parker describes what he calls his ‘red thread’.

[9:25] Parker discusses the role of conflict in compassionate accountability.

[12:52] What is happening with conflict in our society?

[15:43] What kind of internal work do humans need to do to see abundance in relationships rather than scarcity?

[18:41] Parker shares the five habits of the heart for democracy to function.

[24:49] Parker talks about leadership and presence in the context of burnout.

[29:33] Parker shares his advice to leaders.

[31:59] What is life trying to teach Parker now?

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

The Gift of Presence. The Perils of Advice, Parker J. Palmer.

POETRY + PROSE + POLITICS: Pro-democracy, Pro-civil discourse, Pro-decency

Tweetables:

“Our Education system educates people largely on external realities, and they are rarely taught on their inner journeys, their psyches, and souls.”  — Parker Palmer #oncompassion

“If you choose to live an unexamined life, please do not take a job that involves working with other people.” — Parker Palmer #oncompassion

“Conflict demands that we let go of internal narcissism to understand others deeper.” — Parker Palmer #oncompassion

“By working together, we create abundance.” — Parker Palmer   #oncompassion

“The more you know about someone’s story, the less possible it is to despise or dismiss them, which builds compassion and can be done in the workplace.” — Parker Palmer #oncompassion

“Knowing the ground in which you are standing is called presence.”— Parker Palmer #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Joe Mull, who is an expert in developing leaders and building healthy work teams and cultures. Joe approaches the challenges of attracting and retaining talent in a unique way. He's the author of 3 books, including No More Team Drama and his newest, Employalty. He hosts the globally popular management podcast Boss Better Now, and his work as a leadership, workforce, and employee engagement expert has appeared in Entrepreneur, Fortune, Fast Company, and The Wall Street Journal.

Key Takeaways:

[3:06] Joe made up the word “Employalty”  in an effort to translate the complex into the simple: Employer, Loyalty, and Humanity.

[4:05] The subtitle of Joe’s book is powerful: How to Ignite Commitment and Keep Top Talent in the New Age of Work; what does he mean by New Age of Work?

[5:39:] What are some of the biggest challenges we are facing today regarding leadership, the workforce, and employee engagement?

[6:43] Joe talks about the people who decide to become entrepreneurs.

[8:49] Joe addresses the missing aspects no one is talking about.

[10:14] Joe describes the ingredients for commitment.

[11:19] Where does the great boss factor lay?

[11:45] The key to talent retention: Join, stay, care, and try.

[14:14] Joe dives deep into what motivates employees.

[16:20]  Why does Joe still use the word ’boss’?

[19:50] What is Joe’s most enlightening idea?

[21:25] Creating a more humane workplace starts with a simple question: What would make this place the very best place to thrive in your profession?

[23:00] Joe discusses the business case and the necessary mind shift to retain talent.

[24:06] Commitment + effort benefits every area of work.

[24:50] What are the most significant barriers to engaging in the mind shift needed at workplaces to make them more humane?

[27:17] Joe discloses a funny story behind the creation of his latest book.

[30:17] How do Joe's principles show up in his life?

[32:55] Joe helps people identify what their Ideal jobs look like.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

No More Team Drama: Ending the Gossip, Cliques, & Other Crap That Damage Workplace Teams, Joe Mull

Employalty: How to Ignite Commitment and Keep Top Talent in the New Age of Work, Joe Mull 

Tweetables:

“The secret to getting great people who will do a great job is  to create a more humane employee experience.” #oncompassion

“An ideal job is described by how it fits into someone’s life..” #oncompassion

“Money has little to do with the effort we put into the work we do. Money impacts motivation but doesn't increase it.” #oncompassion

“People are not quitting; they are upgrading.” #oncompassion

“Commitment results from doing meaningful work for a great boss.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Dr. Liz Wilson, a Behavioral Scientist, Organizational Transformation Expert, and founder of Include Inc. Originally from Australia, she is now based in the United States. She has developed a robust new framework that seeks to shift the focus of inclusion from a list of categories and identities to addressing the needs of all people.

Key Takeaways:

[2:18] What are some of the formative moments along Dr. Liz’s way that got her to where she is today?

[5:45] Dr. Liz shares her unique perspective on inclusion.

[7:42:] Dr. Liz created a framework called The Eight Inclusion Needs Model that accomplishes ‘transcend and include’ (which involves compassion and accountability).

[10:11] First need: Access.

[10:24] Second need: Space.

[11:06] Third need: Opportunity.

[11:19] Fourth need: Representation.

[11:40] Fifth need: Allowance.

[12:28] Sixth need: Language.

[12:53] Seventh need: Respect.

[13:28] Eighth need: Support.

[14:17]  Dr. Liz explains why this framework works more effectively than previous models for inclusion.

[16:03]  What is the difference between understanding (and even appreciating differences) and inclusion?

[17:47] What has been Dr. Liz’s experience introducing her model for companies to implement?

[21:06] Dr. Liz discusses the most significant struggles people encounter when practicing her framework for inclusion.

[23:36] Dr. Liz has a mantra: Create psychological safety through your own transparency.

[25:46] People often misunderstand vulnerability with weakness.

[26:44] Dr. Liz unpacks the difference between understanding and caring.

[31:15] What is Dr. Liz currently working on?

[33:01] Check out Include Chat.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Tweetables:

“You need to look at the whole person for inclusion.” #oncompassion

“We have not been doing inclusion; the focus was only on diversity.”  #oncompassion

“Inclusion is the ‘how’, the behaviors that we demonstrate based on our awareness and understanding of diversity.” #oncompassion

“Practice this mantra: I create psychological safety through my own transparency.” #oncompassion

“Transparency and vulnerability is not about being weak; it is about being human.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes John Parr, his friend, colleague, thought partner, and sounding board for nearly 20 years. John served in the Royal Navy as an Electronic Engineer, has managed a Substance Abuse Recovery Center, has been a therapist, a corporate consultant, an executive coach, and a professional trainer. He's recognized for his work in communication skills and emotional assertiveness. He's an author of books on these topics and created the Emotional Assertiveness Model, a practical framework to express emotions and build relationships authentically.

What's In This Episode:

• How John’s childhood and experience in the Navy formed his philosophy.
• What is emotional assertiveness and why is it important?
• What’s the difference between EQ and EI?
• What gets in the way of emotional assertiveness?
• Overview of John’s book, Fore-play, Fair-play & Foul-play.
• What does emotional assertiveness look like in action?
• Overview of John’s books, trainings, and certification offerings.

Key Takeaways:

[3:01] John briefly overviews some of the foundational influences that have shaped his view of life.

[4:35] John talks about his experience managing a Substance Abuse Treatment Center.

[5:18] How did John become interested in the power of effective communication and interpersonal skills?

[7:18] What is emotional assertiveness, and why is it so important?

[9:51] How are emotional assertiveness and intelligence related?

[11:23] What gets in the way of human beings being emotionally assertive?

[14:50] John explains the meaning of fore-play, fair-play, and foul-play.

[19:10] John discusses the core of his book  Fore-play, Fair-play, and Foul-play.

[22:25] Happiness is a core homeostatic emotion, and then there are three other emotions: sad, angry, and afraid. 

[24:03] John provides an example of emotional assertiveness in action.

[29:26] Dr. Nate and John discuss the importance of engaging in conflict to produce results.

[30:41] John confesses he has never had negative client feedback.

[34:45] What is next for John?

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Fore-play, Fair-play, and Foul-play: Emotional Assertiveness, the Happiness Equation John Parr

What’s Love Got to Do with It?: Harnessing the Power of Love in Your Relationships,  John Parr

Visit www.teamemotion.com

Tweetables:

“Being assertive is the bedrock of having healthy relationships.” #oncompassion

“Assertiveness is a skill that could be learned and taught.” #oncompassion

“We are often taught to be manipulative, not assertive.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Amy Luckey to today’s conversation. Amy is an Executive Coach who specializes in working with neurodivergent leaders (diagnosed or not), helping them overcome challenges and reach their goals. 

Dr. Nate and Amy discuss today the role of compassion in coaching leaders and provide actionable tips for implementing compassion in the workplace. They also dive deep into the importance of allowing suffering while being with and seeing others.

.

Key Takeaways:

[3:03] Why is it relevant to implement compassion in the workplace?

[5:11] Is it important to have a common definition of compassion?  Yes, but Amy proposes a much more experiential approach. 

[9:45] Experiencing compassion must come together with talking and reflecting on it.

[11:49] What are some of the components of compassion?  

[17:36] Compassion: Struggle with or being with someone in their suffering?

[21:48] Dr. Nate discusses developing emotional fluency and self-awareness based on Brene Brown’s research.

[24:27] Amy talks about the notion of being seeing.

[28:41] How can we bring more compassion into Corporate America?

[30:06] Amy shares some tools she uses when working with clients.

[35:01] Dr. Nate and Amy explore the significance of pausing.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience, Brene Brown

Dare to Lead: Brave Work. Tough Conversations. Whole Hearts, Brene Brown

Tweetables:

“Allowing the suffering is a main component of compassion.” #oncompassion

“The human soul does not need to be advised; it needs to be witnessed.” #oncompassion

“You can show compassion without conflict.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Jesh De Rox, a cultural Anthropologist, speaker, and entrepreneur whose work explores the link between emotional intelligence, creative genius, human connection, and joy.

Jesh is the co-founder and CEO of Superfeel. This revolutionary social wellness platform uses deep insights from neuroscience and anthropology to help people authentically express themselves, meaningfully connect, and grow.

Key Takeaways:

[2:49] Jesh shares Dr. Nate's presentation's impact on him.

[6:06] How did Jesh become interested in photography?

[10:04] Jesh explains what he defines as a “Personal Wall.”

[12:09] Jesh figured out how to lower these “Personal Walls”.

[13:53] What are some of the strategies that Jesh developed to help lower these personal walls?

[18:25] Jesh explains how connection can be created only by reintroducing creative interaction.

[20:57] Jesh and Dr. Nate play the color game.

[24:39] Jesh prefers Interpersonal Intelligence rather than Artificial Intelligence.

[27:14] We are constantly obsessed with survival, which can be an obstacle to accessing higher places in our consciousness and connecting authentically with people.

[28:17] What does Superfeel offer to its users?

[29:04] Jesh talks about one of the problems in the algorithm design.

[32:44] What can the public expect from Superfeel? How does it work?

[34:32] Jesh built a technology that is capable of caring.

[35:38] Superfeel will be launching in the following month.

[36:32] In Superfeel, everything is rated as inspiring, helpful, or funny.

[38:34] Superfeel gives people the tools they need to have friendships and mentorship with anybody.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Visit Superfeel.com and sign in for the waiting list.

Tweetables:

“People don’t feel their lives very often.” #oncompassion

“The only way of inviting someone to lower their wall is first to lower yours.” #oncompassion

“When personal walls are down, you not only get a beautiful picture, but you get joy, connection, and creative expression.” #oncompassion

“Connection is as simple as reintroducing creative interaction.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Cy Wakeman to this special 50th episode of The Compassionate Accountability Podcast. Cy is a drama researcher, international leadership speaker, and consultant. In 2001, she founded Reality-Based Leadership. Cy works with organizations globally to ditch the drama, hardwire accountability into their teams, and turn excuses into results.

Key Takeaways:

[2:18] What did motivate Cy to research drama?

[6:24] CY defines drama and how that relates to leadership training.

[7:28] Cy advises to consider drama as waste (and organizations know what to do with waste in their processes)

[8:22] What are the key sources of trauma? Ego and lack of accountability are the first two drama triggers.

[11:03] Conflict is just energy! Either we waste it or take advantage of it.

[13:05] Love up (compassion) and Call up (accountability).

[19:30] Cy explains the notion of Reality-based Leadership, considering that multiple things are true simultaneously and expanding on the future of leadership.

[22:21] We all want success and happiness.

[27:15] Reality-based thinking: Given this reality, what are some ways we can be great?

[30:56] You have drama in your organization because you hired it, you enabled it, or you are it.

[34:39] Cy talks about how she helps organizations.

[35:50] Cy shares what is on the horizon for her now: Transitioning her organization to her team.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Right Kind of Wrong: The Art of Failing Well, Amy Edmondson

Tweetables:

“Drama is energy that goes away from results and well being” #oncompassion

“Drama is an emotional waste.”  #oncompassion

“Ego is the number one key source of trauma.” #oncompassion

“Modern leadership is managing the energy of people.” #oncompassion

“Rules without relationship equals rebellion.” #oncompassion

“A bad day for the ego is a great day for the leader.”  #oncompassion

“You have drama in your organization because you hired it, you enabled it, or you are it.” #oncompassion

“You are the source of all your problems.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes  Caverly Morgan to today’s episode. Caverly is a spiritual teacher, author, speaker, and nonprofit founder. She is the founder and Lead Contemplative of Peace in Schools—a nonprofit that created the nation's first for-credit mindfulness class in public high schools. She is also the founder of Presence Collective, a community of cross-cultural contemplatives committed to personal and collective transformation, creating spaces for wisdom exchange and belonging.

Caverly blends the original spirit of Zen with a modern, nondual approach. Her practice began in 1995 and has included eight years of training in a silent Zen monastery. She has been teaching contemplative practice since 2001. Caverly is passionate about creating opportunities to experience compassion and connection in the community. 

Caverly shares today how she is manifesting compassion and accountability in the world. 

Key Takeaways:

[2:40] Caverly shares some highlights of her journey that brought her where she is today.

[4:05] Caverly became attracted to the question: Is it possible to move through life either without suffering or less of it?

[4:56] How does Caverly define compassion?

[7:12] Caverly defines compassion as an experience.

[8:52] Caverly talks about the link between her work and compassion as an innate ability.

[10:54] How do we bring compassion into our workspaces?

[11:29]  Are there common barriers that people face to practice compassion?

[13:17] Always striving vs. Contentedness: If we are at peace, do we lose our motivation?

[15:40] Caverly is not a fan of self-improvement and she explains why.

[18:09] Caverly shares some valuable examples of the value of interconnection.

[21:13] Ask yourself: What blocks in our environment prevent us from truly showing the heart of who we are?

[24:32] What if we reinterpret the value of conflict in our relationships? Conflict is efficient in our shared purpose.

[26:58] Caverly describes her work with high school students and educators

[28:35] Caverly shares a particular story.

[30:49] Where does Caverly currently find joy and fulfillment?

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Learn more about Caverly Morgan

Check out Caverly’s books: A Kid’s Book About Mindfulness and The Heart of Who We Are: Realizing Freedom Together.

Tweetables:

“Transformation happens in the interaction.” #oncompassion

“Compassion is a byproduct of knowing that we are connected.” #oncompassion

“We often get confused about who we are since our identities can wrap around what we do or whether or not we are successful.” #oncompassion

“Freedom is contagious.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes Jeff Jacobs to today’s episode. Jeff has a 30-plus year career in Human Resources spanning numerous Global Leadership roles. He is currently the Senior Director of Organizational Effectiveness at Adobe. In that capacity, he serves as an executive coach and internal consultant to senior leadership teams across the company.

Dr. Nate and Jeff discuss the particularities of his position at Adobe; they explore the features of a healthy team and the challenges a team must confront to achieve its best performance. Jeff shares his vast knowledge of psychological safety, vulnerability, diversity, and inclusiveness based on his extensive experience in leading high-performing teams.

Key Takeaways:

[3:40] Jeff talks about a conference both he and Dr. Nate recently participated in.

[5:15] Jeff shares some of his background and journey that led him to his current position at Adobe.

[6:57] What about Jeff’s Senior Director of Organizational Effectiveness position at Adobe is unique?

[9:26] What makes a team healthy?

[11:00] Jeff addresses compassion and inclusivity as crucial features of a healthy team.

[12:40] Where does conflict come in for high-performing teams?

[15:13] What is psychological safety? How does it contribute to high-performing teams?

[18:50] What does “radical candor” really mean?

[21:15] Jeff expands on the key to effective feedback.

[22:20] How does vulnerability contribute to high-performing teams?

[24:57] Why do so many leaders perceive vulnerability as a weakness?

[27:27] What are some of the systems and processes that can support high-performing cultures?

[31:32] How does Jeff measure the impact of what he does?

[33:13] What is the difference between people liking you, and benefiting an organization?

[35:44] Jeff talks about the book he is about to release.

[39:13] Jeff shares how he keeps himself vulnerable and open.

[42:35] Dr. Nate shares his top takeaways from a fantastic conversation with Jeff Jacobs.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

The Right Kind of Wrong: The Science of Failing Well, Amy Edmondson

Radical Candor: How to Get What You Want by Saying What You Mean, Tim Scott

Learn more about Jeff Jacobs’ book Still Coming of Age.

Tweetables:

“A healthy team starts with trust and psychological safety.” #oncompassion

“Leveraging diversity is not just about accepting and valuing differences; there is an inherent conflict in diversity and also an inherent opportunity.” #oncompassion

“Psychological safety is the foundation that enables someone to lean into the discomfort.” #oncompassion

“Culture is to build one relationship at a time.” #oncompassion

“Vulnerability is one of the most profound leadership strengths that exists.” #oncompassion

Dr. Nathan Regier, your host, welcomes you to another episode of On Compassion — this time to discuss deep psychology, human behavior, and how to impact big-scale change. Dr. Nate is joined by Dov Baron, the founder and CEO of Dov Baron International. Dov is a preeminent expert in helping leaders create life and work meaning, his models and strategies of the emotional source code and the anatomy of meaning are used by leaders in business and government worldwide.

What's In This Episode

• What inspired Dov at age 14 to get out of the ghetto in the UK where he was born?
• What is the Anatomy of Meaning?
• What is the emotional Source Code?
• What are the five levels of Emotional Source Code that predict lasting behavior change?
• How do we explain the behavior of current political leaders, suicide bombers or Neo Nazis?
• Why are we so lonely?
• The power of belonging, and the impact on productivity.
• How do we create cultures of belonging?
• What is Dov’s religion? Why does it matter?
• What you can do to encourage belonging.

Key Takeaways:

[4:14] Dov shares some experiences from his past that formed who he is today.

[8:55] What is the nature of Dov’s business?

[12:07} What is the anatomy of meaning?

[14:32] We have a responsibility at a personal level to know our anatomy of meaning (which doesn’t mean it is the truth, but it is still yours).

[15:43] Dov explains what he calls algorithms of rage.

[17:22] Dov defines the emotional source code.

[24:03] How do we reconcile the human side of relationships with the increasing push toward productivity and results?

[28:10] Dov gives a critical suggestion for those wanting to apply his concepts: Embrace curiosity.

[34:10] Dr. Nate shares the top three takeaways from a fabulous conversation with Dov Baron.

Mentioned in this episode:

The Compassion Mindset

Compassionate Accountability: How Leaders Build Connection and Get Results, Nate Regier

Visit Next-Element

Learn more about Dov Baron

Listen to Leadership and Loyalty Podcast and Curiosity Bites Podcast.

Tweetables:

“Trauma can become a driving force for what is good and what is not so good, and without awareness, it won’t go well.” #oncompassion

“Purpose is not the way; it is the why of the why, which drives us unconsciously.” #oncompassion

“Now, more than ever, in this epidemic of loneliness, people want community.” #oncompassion

“Those who control the meaning of the tribe control the movement of the tribe.” #oncompassion