Confessions of a Chronic Assumer

In Episode 12, Ellen wraps up Season One of the podcast! She talks about how assumptions impair our ability to reflect. We get caught up in the moment, we don’t pause to reflect until much later, and can’t see the forest through the trees. I’ve shared countless examples throughout these episodes of how I’ve been affected by it. What happens when we’re in these situations? What assumptions are happening in our heads? What stories are we telling ourselves about what we’re “allowed” or “supposed” to do, say, think, or feel? How do we overcome those assumptions and do the work? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them. And don’t miss the link to the free downloadable Reflection Guide: https://patnaudecoaching.com/patnaude-coaching-books/i-thought-you-knew/reflection-guide/

In Episode 11, Ellen talks about how assumptions cause projections. This shows up in a myriad of ways, from the harmless to the deadly, and everywhere in between. Let’s start with an easier one. Think about putting clothes, glasses, accessories on our pets. That’s a projection of our emotion. How about our kids? Maybe not out loud, but do you label your kids? One is the “easy child”, another is the “difficult child”? If not your own kids, maybe you secretly apply those labels to other people’s kids? On a more serious note, what happens in your gut when you see someone who looks different from you? A different race? A different religion on display through jewelry, tattoos, clothing, etc.? What happens when we’re in these situations? What assumptions are happening in our heads? What stories are we telling ourselves about other people? How do we overcome those assumptions and stop projecting our own emotions and desires onto them? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 10, Ellen wraps up the two-part mini-series talking about how assumptions affect how we think about and set boundaries. Or don’t. Because we assume we can’t. Have you ever felt powerless to say no? To a conversation, to a meeting, to a date, to a physical invasion of your space? Do you find yourself saying things like, “I have to” or “I don’t want to but I don’t have a choice?” It’s like something in your body knows at a visceral level that you should be setting a boundary, but you don’t feel like you have “permission” to do so. What happens when we’re in these situations? What assumptions are happening in our heads? What stories are we telling ourselves about what we’re “allowed” or “supposed” to do, say, think, or feel? How do we overcome those assumptions and set boundaries? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 9, Ellen kicks off a two-part mini-series talking about one form of boundaries and how assumptions can interfere with how we set boundaries, and if we set boundaries, between our public and private lives. How worried are you about whether or not people like you? People outside of your core family and closest friends. How does that impact how you show up in those relationships? Again, the ones outside of your inner circle. Has wanting to be liked, or fearing being disliked, ever influenced your behavior? If not, you’re not human, so there’s that. But how often does that happen? What happens when we’re in these situations? What assumptions are happening in our heads? What stories are we telling ourselves about what we’re “allowed” or “supposed” to do, say, think, or feel? How do we overcome those assumptions and set better boundaries in those relationships? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 8, Ellen talks about how assumptions affect how and if we extend trust to other people. Do you work with someone you don’t trust? Do you feel like they did something to “break” that trust? Do you feel like the burden is on them to “earn” your trust back? Do you avoid interacting with them any more than necessary? What happens when we’re in these situations? How do assumptions interfere with what we do next? How do we overcome those assumptions and engage productively? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 7, Ellen talks about how assumptions affect how, and if, we listen. (What did you say?) Do you already think you know what the other person is going to say? Assumption. Think you already know their perspective? Assumption. Think you know the reasons behind their words or actions? Assumption. What happens when we’re in these situations? How do assumptions interfere with what we do next? How do we overcome those assumptions and engage productively? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 6, Ellen talks about how assumptions affect our questions, from asking to not asking, to how we ask, to what we ask. How do you know what questions are good questions? When is it okay to ask and when is it not? If you thought of a question after, or didn’t want to ask in the moment, can you go back? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 5, Ellen talks about how assumptions affect all types of human gatherings, from meetings to 1-1 conversations, to telling your kids to do their chores. Have you ever blurted out something in a meeting and realized quickly that it was the wrong thing to say, or that it came out wrong? Or the opposite–NOT said something and regretted it later? When you’re talking to someone, or in a meeting, and it isn’t going well, do you take responsibility for getting things back on track? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 4, Ellen talks about how assumptions affect how we show up in various situations, and how we read the room once we get there. Have you ever walked into a new group of people and had the conversation stop? Started a presentation or just sharing your perspective in a meeting only to realize everyone is just staring at you? Or maybe this is something you never even think about? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.

In Episode 3, Ellen talks about ways in which confidence affects the assumptions we make, assumptions affect our confidence, and how they are inherently intertwined. How does it hurt us and those around us? What assumptions are at work? How do we overcome those assumptions to prevent them from affecting our confidence? Join Ellen as she shares her own experiences making assumptions, and insights about ways to overcome them.