CongreGate

First, don't miss Micah's exciting announcement!

This week's topic is from a listener that wrote in with a great question about discussing cultural issues with unbelieving co-workers. Our friend asks how we should interact with people at work that have an opposite worldview. Specifically, she mentioned talking to those friends that support abortion, homosexual marriage, marijuana legalization, and related issues.

As followers of Christ, our first priority should be to treat every person with respect and love. We value people above their opinions, and we can separate loving a person from embracing their views. Mark says he tells his students to be vicious with ideas and gentle with people. Not all ideas have equal value, but that doesn't devalue the person who had the idea. Disagreeing with people doesn't mean you think they are bad people or that you hate them. Loving people means we should tell them the truth.

Shawn shares a recent example from our government that illustrates how people in our country can no longer separate people's viewpoints from the people themselves. More about that in the links below.

Practically, we need to help our co-workers and neighbors to understand that Christianity is not only true but also good. Most people in our country do not understand the Christian worldview. They don't have any context for absolute truth and only know the "rules" without understanding our motivation for following them.

Micah encourages us not to always be on the defensive side. Try turning the questions back around and lovingly ask thoughtful questions to accusers and critics.

Are you living in a conservative Christian echo chamber? If you haven't heard the term, living in an "echo chamber" means that you only taking in information and listening to thoughts that reinforce your current viewpoint.

As conservative Christians, we can sometimes fall into some traps, thinking only one way about theology or social issues, without considering other views. For example, do we only ever look for study materials from John Piper or do we ignore opinions from authors that we know may have some differing theological views? If we disagree with someone on one theological issue, do we discount their other thoughts entirely?

What about church membership? We believe it's ok to have specific statements of belief that our members agree to. In order to worship together, we must have some views in common.

We also want our children to be able to articulate their viewpoints and opposing viewpoints. It's important to allow free discussion of ideas so that our children develop the ability to think and respond logically and Biblically to other views. But there's a balance to strike. We encourage you to expose your children to other thoughts and views that are age-appropriate and with discernment. They don't necessarily need to see an R-rated movie to understand why we don't typically watch them. Regular conversation and reading time with your children is a great benefit to them, allowing you to discuss different social and theological views, and building a solid foundation of right thinking.

First, Micah tells us how he got locked in the crawlspace under the house. Don't worry, the 3-year-old figured out how to open the lock for him!

Today we chat about what fathers should be teaching their sons, for example, should fathers teach their son to throw a ball? What are the basic skills we as dads should be teaching our sons? Are basic sports skills that important?

Dads have a responsibility for the physical, spiritual, and emotional well-being of their children. Why is throwing a ball, or learning basic athletic skills, important to our kids' development? Athletic skills are a great tool to help build perseverance and good character in our children. Mark says sports are helpful for building confidence, yielding to others, playing in your position, and knowing what you are good at.

We talk about how a former Navy Seal attributes some of the critical skills he needed for military operations to the sports he played with his dad as a child.

Shawn talks about some of the skills his dad taught him, including driving a manual transmission car.He also shares some of the things he wished he had spent time learning from his dad while he was still living at home. Micah remembers some of the skills he learned from Mark, like studying the Bible, public speaking, writing well, and working hard to maintain their home. They also spent time playing baseball together, where he learned to persevere through a losing season.

We talk about what things we can teach our daughters. In addition to being a good example of what they should look for in a husband, we encourage you to include your daughters in athletic activities too. We still want our daughters to learn perseverance, confidence, and the value of hard work. Mark shares a few thoughts about encouraging our daughters to embrace their God-given roles as women. And we talk about why it's important to pay attention to things our daughters want to show us, whether it be art projects, athletic skills, or "show" they create.

We need to be careful that we are checking our own attitudes to make sure we aren't pushing our children to work hard for our own selfish motivations.

What are some skills your dad taught you that had a lasting legacy?

Should Christians support movies that depict literal Bible events? Are movies about the life of Jesus (and other prominent Bible characters) helpful to the Gospel or harmful? We're not talking about all movies with Christian themes, just movies specifically about Biblical events like The Passion of the Christ,The Nativity Story, and the new movie about the apostle Paul.

Just to be clear, we believe this is a Christian liberty issue. We take different sides in this debate to explore the positive and negative effects of making movies based on scripture.

Shawn believes that the overall outcome does more harm than good, while Mark & Micah argue that Christian movies can help and encourage people. We encourage you to research and think about what you are watching before you decide to take your family to see Bible movies.

In our visually-oriented culture, people often watch movies without reading the books. In Bible movies, we also have to add details about people's personalities and context. Are these extra-Biblical details harmful or helpful? Mark says it helps people imagine the context for themselves. Shawn says it's important to make sure people understand which details are Biblical and which details are added because they won't necessarily go find out for themselves.

J.I. Packer (in Knowing God) says that visual representations of Christ are a violation of the Second Commandment. We share our thoughts about how this relates to movies that depict Biblical events.

What do you think? Let us know how you feel about movies that depict Bible Stories...

It's Spring! Time to get out the lawnmower and get started on some of the DIY projects around the house. Today we're just chatting about life—basketball, the Spring projects we've been working on, and a few fun stories about DIY projects.

We all have big lawns and riding lawnmowers that require regular maintenance. Find out which tasks we do ourselves and which ones we hire out. Plus, Mark tells you what alligator hunters and lawnmowers have in common.

Is YouTube a helpful tool or a killer of community? Sure...you can find DIY videos about anything you need to fix, but does it keep you from connecting with your friends in real life? We want to teach our kids to be problem-solvers and YouTube can be a helpful tool for quick DIY tips. On the other hand, we also have friends and neighbors with valuable skills and knowledge to offer. We chat about when YouTube has been helpful versus when it has been easier to call a friend for advice.

First, we spend a few minutes catching up on March Madness, Shawn's family camping trip, and Micah's home invasion. Because of Micah's recent experience, it seemed good to talk about preparing your home and protecting your family from home invasion. We also talk about the difference between faith and fear, some lessons learned, and how our stuff is not eternal.

As Christian men, we are called by God to be the protectors of our family. Are we helping our wives and children to feel safe? We need to trust that God is sovereign over our circumstances and take responsibility to protect our families. The two things are not mutually exclusive. Taking action is not lack of trust in the Lord, and blind faith without preparation is not using wisdom.

Micah shares some of their thoughts about the stuff that was taken from their home and some practical tips to help you secure your home and belongings. Don't keep your fire safe in the master bedroom, look into identity theft protection and monitoring, and keep digital files and passwords in secure cloud-based applications. Mark also talks about the contrast between the things that Micah treasures (eternal things) and the things his recently deceased brother had treasured (earthly things).

We encourage you to think about the things you treasure and the how you are spending your time. Are you spending time building eternal treasure by building your relationship with the Lord, your family, and other people?

Have you taken the time to meet your neighbors and find out how you can minister to them? We have been trained to think of our workplace as a place of ministry, but do we think of our home as a place of ministry too? God put you in your house, in your neighborhood, to be a light to your neighbors. Are you looking for ways to minister to the families in your area?

We chat about different experiences with neighbors we've had over the years and opportunities we've had to minister to them in different ways. One of our pastor friends challenged us to learn the spiritual condition of every home surrounding ours and find ways to love, serve, and share the gospel with those around us.

We appreciate the opportunities that our children have to spend time with neighbors of different ages and backgrounds. Many times our children are bolder than we are and find ways to bless the neighbors in ways we hadn't thought to serve them.

This episode is mostly stories of different interactions we've had with our neighbors and we pray it encourages you to meet and find ways to serve your neighbors!

Today we are talking about engaging with your children one on one. Though we encourage and promote planning family activities, we also think it's important to find time to spend intentional time alone with each of our children. As dads, we have found that meeting with our kids one on one helps build stronger relationships with them and build up the family as a whole.

All of us take kids to run errands, but what we're talking about today is a little different. How can we make opportunities where the purpose of the time is to engage the child in real conversation? We want our kids to know their father loves and cares about them as an individual. We want to communicate that we care about their struggles and desire to help them. Hanging out at Lowe's is great, but intentional time and conversation meant to draw out their deeper thoughts take a little more planning and preparation.

We encourage you to look at your schedule and find ways to use to use the time you already have. Shawn takes one of his girls to a one-hour dance class and always takes another child along for an ice cream date. Micah talks about how he engages his kids in conversation in the car instead of turning on the radio.

Let's face it, sometimes kid conversation is boring. It takes work to draw out something longer than one-word answers. One of the tools we recommend is the Donut Date Journal, that provides helpful questions for parents to engage with their children. Many of the questions are fun for the kids, but they also provide valuable insight to the parents as well.

What are some ways you find one on one time to intentionally engage your children?

After some banter about the Winter Olympics and some excitement over replacing windshield wipers, we spend some time reflecting on the life of Billy Graham. As you've probably heard by now, preacher and evangelist, Billy Graham died a few days ago. He spent his life telling millions of people the good news that Jesus Christ was the solution to their sin problem.

We've enjoyed reading and learning more about Billy Graham this week as others remember and reflect on his life. Some of our kids were excited to make the connection between Billy Graham and Franklin Graham (whom they know from Operation Christmas Child and Samaritan's Purse).

We talk about how Billy Graham's travel affected his home life. Franklin Graham talks about this in his autobiography, Rebel with a Cause. How do we balance the call to ministry and the call to lead our families? Where does God give grace and how do we decide which ministry opportunities to pursue? We may have some seasons when God calls us to spend time away from our family, either for work or ministry.

Billy Graham was a known to be a man of integrity. In a culture where men in the public eye often fall into very public sin, Billy Graham stands out as a faithful example of a man serving God in the public eye. We appreciate his life of service to the Lord and hope that you are encouraged to pursue Jesus more because of his example.

Did Billy Graham have a direct influence on your life? We'd love to hear your stories!

Back in 1997, Joshua Harris wrote a book called I Kissed Dating Goodbye. Twenty-one years later with over a million copies sold, Harris has been discussing some of the backlash and feedback he received and what he would do differently now. He has recently opened up about some of his regrets and lessons learned in interviews with World Magazine and on FamilyLife Today.

While many people took away good and helpful principles from the book, some people have claimed that Harris's book "ruined their lives". Some people say they never married because they were afraid to date and interact with people of the opposite sex. Harris, now parenting teens himself, has been addressing some of these comments now that he has a more mature perspective on life.

Shawn and Micah were both heavily influenced by Harris's courtship teaching as homeschooled teens, as were many conservative evangelicals around their age. Though neither of them followed the "courtship rules" legalistically, they mostly had a positive experience using some of the courtship principles to date with intention.

There are often "movements" within the church like this that have a dramatic effect on people's lives. How can we respond to influential Christian books and movements like this? Clearly, we should not be placing a book on a pedestal above the word of God. In this case, many people took Harris's advice as gospel, instead of seeking truth from scripture.

How can we help our teens, and singles in our churches, to have a healthy and balanced perspective of dating and relationships? We share some conversations you should be having with your teens about dating and relationships.

Were you affected by I Kissed Dating Goodbye, either positively or negatively? We'd love to hear your stories!