CONNECTED & CONFIDENT with Melissa J Scott

What is the number one reason stopping most business owners from pressing record on a video camera?! Worrying too much what other people are going to say about them! Especially their peers.

So here are my 5 top tips (+1 bonus tip) on how to be far more confident on camera, and create the kind of content that people really do care about and engage with. 
 

TIP 1: TUNE INTO YOUR PURPOSE

·      Reverse engineer what you are trying to say in your video.

·      What is the outcome that you want?

·      Who is your audience?

·      What is their pain?

·      How do you solve it?

TIP 2: STOP MAKING IT ABOUT YOU

When you fear making video… you are far too much in your head and not in your heart. It’s your ego worrying stuff that isn’t even real. When you’re thinking about the people that you actually help, and you change the focus to them and not yourself… your confidence grows dramatically! Think about the results you can get people, and how you have helped so many people in the past, and it will instantly change your focus from “what are people saying about me?” to “I have some valuable information tha will really help people, that they deserve to know”. BIG DIFFERENCE in your mindset! 

TIP 3: BE PREPARED

This is almost a no-brainer but you’d be shocked how many business owners don’t do this!

• Have a game plan with a clear starting point addressing a client’s pain point, and then share how you can solve their problems - be the solution and connect to this feeling of being an industry leader
• Speak to keypoints only, do not script it out – and speak about topics you are really familiar with initially while you are growing your confidence
• Speak to the stories giving evidence of how you help our audience
• Practice!!!!! No memorising. Just practice the keypoints.

TIP 4: BE COMFORTABLE

• Breathe!!! Quieten the mind. Find an environment that you’re comfortable in and create video in that space.
• Look the part, be natural, and really connect to your message
• Visualise yourself being great and that speaking on camera is a breeze – trick your brain into believing you’ve done it all before and it’s easy for you
• If you are still really struggling, you might have some blocked self limiting beliefs, and there are some awesome NLP and kinesiology unblocking exercises I can share with you that will really help. 

TIP 5: ACCEPT THAT YOUR FIRST VIDEOS WILL SUCK, SO YOU MIGHT AS WELL JUST DO THEM AND GET PAST THE BEGINNER STAGE!!

Most people think they have to present their video perfectly, and it’s just not like that at all. We are humans, we do mess up words, we do get muddled, we do laugh at ourselves, and it’s great to sometimes show this human side on camera!

So use the editing tool to your advantage, but keep the natural conversational part in the video. It can work to your advantage because it makes you more relatable.

BONUS TIP… SMILE!

It sounds so basic but do you know how many clients of mine look like a deer in headlights when they first start out making video! They get so serious and it’s because they’re worried what people are going to say… especially their peers!

Well please, no more. 

It’s not about you. Or your peers.

It’s about the people that you are helping. Your clients and your potential clients.

Listen in to the video or podcast episode, and let me know what you think!

I’d love to hear if any of these tips helped you out.

To get in touch with Melissa:
https://www.melissajscott.com
https://divinecreative.com.au

It’s probably not two topics that you would put together, but there are so many correlations between all the lessons I learned preparing and competing at my recent body building bikini competition vs what it takes to run, market and brand your business! It was one of the best experiences of my life and while many people think they couldn’t do it, you’d be surprised what you are truly capable of when you just do it one day at a time.

The biggest take home for me from my recent bodybuilding competition, is that I want to apply all that I have learned over the past 2 years about myself through that experience, across all aspects of my life.

So when it comes to marketing and building your business, or your personal brand… we expect it to happen in a matter of weeks or a month, when realistically it might take a couple of years. But is 1 or 2 years a long time really in the grand scale of things? Not really. Not when it’s life changing and permanent.

So here goes:

1. Your desired outcome and action plan - We need to have a plan. If you just start with a goal but no idea of how you’re going to get there, you won’t get there.

2. When you don’t have the knowledge… get a coach to mentor you! If this is an area that you don’t know what you’re doing, then work with somebody that does. And the more qualified they are, the better

3. The Universe will test you along the way! You better believe it! Nothing is a coincidence and each challenge is a step to see just how bad do you want it. 

4. Stick to a routine with your Action Plan

5. And make sure it’s customised for YOU.

6. Set yourself up for success. 

7. Set goals and make them achievable so each month you feel like you are having a win. Share your goals with people, so you’re more accountable and more likely to achieve what you set out to do.

8. Your coach needs to be personal and constantly working with you on your mindset, because they go hand in hand.

9. Work towards a clear outcome at the end. It has to look like success in your eyes.

10. Be aligned with your coach’s motto! My coach lives by Dedication. Determination. Discipline. And that worked for me! 

11. Repetition is what will get you there. There are no shortcuts. It’s not glamour - but it looks glamorous! It’s 5% appearance and 95% grit… just like building your brand!

12. Make sure your goal… is your goal! Don’t compare yourself to others. This is your journey, and your outcome. You get to measure your own success on how it makes you feel, not what other people think.

13. Be surrounded by people that share your vision, or at least support it. Accept that some people will just not understand or respect what you are trying to do, and will be happy to vocalize that to you!

14. Understand that you will feel uncomfortable, And you will need to challenge your comfort zone. Don’t be half assed, if you want true success, you need to go all in.

15. Get excited about learning new stuff, and never think that you know better. You have to be ‘coachable’, so don’t be trapped in your ego.

16. Understand what the numbers mean. The numbers on the scale, the numbers of your calories… the numbers in your business and the numbers in your marketing analytics… they all tell a story and shouldn’t be ignored because they tell the truth. 

17. Visualize you in the success as you imagine it. Self-belief is crucial that you believe you can achieve this goal. Do not listen to the knockers. You may need to change your tribe.

18. Be + Do + Have Model. Who do you need to be right now, and what actions do you need to do, to have what you really want to have?

19. It’s your unique challenge and your goal.

20. Be prepared to be challenged. It’s never smooth sailing. Nothing ever runs smoothly.

21. What can you do that is that 1 or 2% more?

Here is a slightly different kind of video/podcast today for Connected and Confident!

If you have ever doubted yourself, or wanted to deeply challenge yourself, and you wanted to get to know yourself better and understand what you are made of… then you might really enjoy this! As some of you might know if you follow my social channels, in October 2022 I competed in the ICN Body Building Competition in the Over 50’s Bikini Competition! What you won’t know is that I kept a video diary for the last 3 weeks of preparation, taking you through all the trials and tribulations of getting stage ready while living a normal life and trying to keep it all together both mentally, physically, spiritually and professionally!!

Believe me, there were many challenges, and I documented them all in a bid to remind myself what it might be like when I go through it all again for competition next year, but also to hopefully inspire, motivate, educate and even entertain anybody that is interested in what the journey was like for a very normal, middle-aged woman to get ready for a competition like this.

PART 1 – 3 WEEKS TO GO! MY FIRST ICN BIKINI PREP OVER 50’S

PART 2 – PEAK WEEK! ONLY 1 WEEK OUT FROM SHOW DAY

PART 3 -  ICN BIKINI OVER 50’S – SHOW DAY!

Please note… I am not a world class athlete! I am very normal and decided to do this competition on a whim back when I was 49. Initially I thought I was going to run a marathon in Europe to commemorate my 50th birthday in May. I actually started training for that and quickly realised I would do more harm to my body than good running that distance (I had done a half marathon at 45, but a full marathon at 50 was just pushing it too much!)

I watched a girlfriend transform her body in a body building competition and I was hooked! That would be my personal challenge. Little did I know the world was heading into Covid lockdown, that it was a whole lot more commitment and work than I could imagine, and it would challenge me in every way, from my self confidence, to self worth, setting boundaries with people so I could get to training regularly, and learning to dismiss criticism from the people closest to me, and just get on with the job and know that what I was doing was for me, and nobody else. Probably the first time in my life I had ever taken such a self-focused direction on anything!

So please enjoy the series. Some of it is hard for me to watch back as I remember how difficult some days were. I was hungry, fatigued, effected by mood swings, dealing with frayed relationships, and feeling very alone at times. But it was all worth it and I can honestly say that the show day was one of the best experiences of my life.

If you are thinking about doing one of these competitions, I highly recommend it. It will not be easy, but it will be an amazing journey. I highly recommend my coach, Emma Bowman from Adelaide, South Australia. And I also invite you to watch the next podcast Episode 31 – WHAT I LEARNED FROM BODY BUILDING VS BUILDING & MARKETING A BUSINESS. The similarities between the two are incredibly similar.

Hope you enjoy the series, and if you do, please share with a friend or colleague that might really benefit from this information. And don’t forget to like and subscribe to the YouTube channel. 

CHECK OUT MELISSA'S WEBSITE & ONLINE COURSES
https://www.melissajscott.com

CHECK OUT MELISSA'S PODCAST CONNECTED & CONFIDENT
https://open.spotify.com/show/3qjDy

‘REINVENTION AND RELAUNCHING – FINDING YOURSELF WHEN YOU DIDN’T KNOW YOU WERE LOST!’

I’ve been MIA for the past little while, (my last podcast was almost 18 months ago!) and I mainly think that was because I have gone on a really deep personal development journey in myself, and I really needed to step back for a while.

I have been very committed to my personal growth over the years, but it really escalated 5 and a half years ago when my husband suddenly died, and in particular when I got into some very unproductive relationships after that! There’s nothing like losing friends, going through emotional hardship and being challenged by unhealthy relationships to teach you a few things about yourself!

And then add in I was turning 50, and that every aspect of my life was coming to a crossroads... I was really challenged for quite some time there! My three sons had grown up and needed me less and less, and I was feeling a little stale in my business. I had been working hard in it for 25 years and moving into doing more marketing coaching and strategy work, (which I really enjoy), but I knew something was really missing for me when speaking to my audience.

For a few years now, I have developed a process that I call Connection Marketing, where you tell your story, share your knowledge, and create a great audience around you who relate to you and literally ‘fall in love’ with what you have to say and how you can help them. It’s all about building a truly magnetic personal brand. But it’s easy to say and much harder to execute!

Most business owners agree this is good for their business, but they don’t want to do it. They don’t want to get that personal and they certainly don’t want to put themselves out there to be criticised by their peers. And I realised that I too didn’t want that kind of deep exposure either! I felt like a fraud because my personal life was not good, I was telling people not to worry about what people thought of them when they marketing, and yet when I’d dip a toe in the water and get some negative response, I’d pull back too and smooth things over so I was far more ‘likeable’! The problem is, this makes you really generic, and that doesn’t create a compelling personal brand!

So I took a bit of a break from marketing my business and I went really deep into what was holding me back, because I figured when I got to know who I truly am, how I can honestly help my audience, and how I can sincerely transform lives – that it would be much easier for me to show up and market myself without giving a flying fuck about what others thought of me! 

 So I joined a covers band and started singing again! Something I’m wildly passionate about and loved doing when I first came to Sydney as a late teenager. I got back into my health and fitness. I started body building and taking great care of my physique and gut health. I learned how to meditate from the monks at the Buddhist Temple in Wollongong. And I journaled, practised mindfulness, walked in nature daily, visualised, worked on my self-talk and became a qualified Tantra practitioner!!

I also learned the Spiral technique of Kinesiology, and NLP (Neuro Linguistics Programming). I now feel I am more than equipped to help my clients unblock their energetic, unconscious programming on many levels with these skills. And I used them on myself to build up my own self-awareness and knowledge.

I really committed to my growth in every aspect of my life, so I could help me and help my family, my friends and my clients. And I learned a lot of incredible things about what holds us back and what it takes to reacquaint yourself with you! 

So in no particular order, here is what I learned about growing individually and breaking through the personal barriers to fearing connecting with an audience through personal branding and standing out from the crowed:

1.     Never, ever think that wha

Today I had the pleasure of chatting with the wonderful Greg Smith from Admins The Answer. He runs an incredible company that offers Admin services specifically to the trade industry in all aspects such as quoting, invoicing and booking appointments.

It’s one thing to have a business that you know does good work… it’s another completely different story when you are able to share with your audience how your business actually changes the lives of your customers…. For the better! And you market around this really important distinction.

HOW DID GREG COME INTO THIS BUSINESS?

As a tradie himself, he realised that good admin is what will make your business successful. When he was a tradie, it was typical to be working 16 hours a day, working his butt off on the tools, coming home late only to have to face the paperwork and never enough time for the family. Admins The Answer was born from living and understanding the pain points of a small tradie business – personally!

WHAT DID GREG LEARN FROM RUNNING A NICHE BUSINESS?

Working with only trade businesses, Greg quickly developed an innate understanding of how it should work and what is required to make it work. In terms of marketing, it has actually made it so much clearer to hone in on their ideal client by getting really targeted with the demographics, rather than a general, scatter-gun approach. He then reaches out to this audience with a far more specific message that they can make their lives easier, and this really resonates with his audience.

 It also enables him to collaborate and create win/win partnership with other sectors such as Accountants and Bookkeepers, to not only attract customers, but to work together to introduce better programs and procedures.
 

WHAT IS IT LIKE TO HAVE AN EMOTIONAL CONVERSATION WITH YOUR CLIENTS THROUGH YOUR SALES AND MARKETING?

 Being able to really drill down to your ideal client’s pain and having the procedures in place has opened up so many doors to be able to have real, open and honest conversations with trades people and their partners. It doesn’t even feel like selling, because it isn’t. Greg talks about a problem that a typical client faces, they identify that he can help them with their problem, and a conversation begins.

 It’s through these conversations with their clients and researching their audience that led Greg and his team to partner with Beyond Blue to donate $100 of profit for every new client in support of Men’s mental health.

WHAT HAS THE RESPONSE BEEN LIKE IN THE INDUSTRY?

Greg recently had a phone call from the wife of a tradie about a month ago. She rang out of the blue, and just wanted to let him know that she hadn’t had an argument with my husband for 2 weeks. They used to argue about the business, the bills, money coming in etc, but ever since they had hired Greg’s business to take over the admin, all the stress has gone. Family life was better. The husband is home at regular times and the arguments at the dining room table have stopped.

 Greg feels so empowered to know that when they say “we are changing people’s lives!” that it really is true.  “In some respect we’re saving relationships!” says Greg.

If you want to have more success in your business and sales, you need to become an expert at creating trust and connection online through your personal brand, and creating quality content. Book a free half hour strategy session with Melissa today to find out how you can be the Rockstar in your industry. If you want it, it is possible.

https://melissajscott.com/
https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://divinecreative.com.au

 Melissa J Scott

Well this episode is certainly me letting my guard down and getting super honest and personal about this next stage of my life as I turn 50! I’m not sure where the time all went, because I sure don’t feel 50, but… on the event of the big milestone birthday it was great to reflect and share some of my feelings around it, and in particular about rediscovering my connection with myself.

I think most of us can relate if we’ve spent the past few decades as a partner, a business owner, a high achiever, a parent, a carer. It’s really, really easy to get lost in the story of your life and lose touch with who you really are, and even moreso… what you really want!!!

If you’ve been following my journey this year, you will know that I’ve ended a serious relationship and am committed to being single for a while, I’ve taken up body building, have reconnected with singing again and actively starting a band, am planning a trip to the outback later this year and most recently, put the wheels in motion to get my motorcycle licence! My youngest has also wrapped up school and turned 18, so I feel like I’m sitting at the pinnacle of my new life and not sure what I actually want!!

“We are all just thinking, feeling, emotional creatures. We are so busy living for the people that we love, that we forget to create a relationship with the most important person of all… ourselves”
Melissa J Scott

The first challenge I faced in the lead up to my 50th birthday seems so easy, but I can’t tell you how hard it was. Just figuring out exactly how I wanted to celebrate my birthday took months to figure out. At the core of it was the sad act, I just didn’t know how to celebrate myself. And I find a lot of women, and men too, simply don’t know how to do this as it isn’t something that comes naturally. Planning a party that was purely around me, was incredibly difficult, because all my life the focus had been on a partner, or my children, or a dear friend, or a client. When it was about somebody else, decision making was infinitely easier!

And this indecision is also something that has carried over into my business career all my life. I have achieved major milestones in my career, superseded fantastic goals, won major projects and new clients and very rarely would I ever actually take the time to be in the moment and celebrate the success or truly acknowledge what an excellent thing I had just done.

Being single and going into my 50th birthday is somewhere I never saw myself as being. We are socially conditioned to believe that we are kind of only a half person if we aren’t completed by a partner. So it took a bit of soul searching to recognise that this period of time is actually a blessing and a wonderful opportunity, for the first time in many years, to truly put some time into my own growth and rediscover the things that interest me, and how I really want to live my life.

“It is a wonderful thing to be connected, not just to our friends and family, but really and truly connected to ourselves.” Melissa J Scott

If any of this is resonating with you or a loved one, please listen in and share if you think it can inspire somebody else to live their best life too.

If you want to have more success in your business and sales, you need to become an expert at creating trust and connection online through your personal brand, and creating quality content. Book a free half hour strategy session with Melissa today.

And if you would like to check out Melissa, follow these links:

https://melissajscott.com/
https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://divinecreative.com.au

Melissa J Scott
x

Is marketing just like dating?!

Last Friday night I was part of a panel that spoke at a singles discussion forum called ‘Love and Learn’ with Visions in Style.

And I thought I was a little unqualified to be on the panel until I realised that life is just about creating quality relationships, establishing connection and getting your message across by whatever means you feel comfortable. And that is what I do every day with my clients. Helping them develop relationships with their audiences and creating meaningful, heartfelt connections that feel deeply personal!

The number one thing that most people want in any relationship is to be heard, understood, and respected.

And your client or potential customer is no different. Marketing should be a two way street with any discussion you have with them. That is why traditional advertising feels really icky. You are only talking AT your customer – and it usually feels like shouting because it’s so one directional. 

Why do you think social media is so popular?! Because on all of the platforms, people have a voice, and they can create communities around them and feel heard and significant. It’s a forum where people feel like they matter. Therefore businesses that offer their clients an opportunity to comment back, engage in conversation, share stories, ask questions and feel like they are part of something… are winning! Want more customers? Create real relationships with them. It’s absolutely no different to creating a meaningful relationship with a friend or a future partner. The customer that feels heard will create a bond with you like no other! If they feel like you are speaking directly to them in a language they understand, then a true connection is created. Just like starting a new personal relationship!

LOVE LANGUAGES
In a quality relationship, you consider people’s 5 love languages.

1. Touch
2. Acts of Service
3. Kind words
4. Gift giving
5. Spending quality time together

Most people are aware of how they like to give love and receive love. So what if you applied these same principles to your customers – where appropriate of course! Acts of service would include providing lots of helpful information and advice for clients that really makes a difference to their lives. Turning up in their inbox, on their social feeds, doing nothing but serving and giving.

Whereas I have a business mentor whose favourite thing to do is send random gifts to her clients because that is her thing.  And if spending lots of quality time together is your particular love language, then showing up regularly to your audience with personalised VIP zoom calls, webinars, going live to your audience regularly, and offering 1:1 sessions… is really going to make them very happy and engaged with your business and service.

Every interaction we have with our potential and existing clients is related to one of the 5 love languages.

Treat people with kindness, respect and understand how your audience likes to be engaged with… and you are on a winning combination!

It’s the person who really knows their target audience so well that they even understand their love languages, that ultimately will win.

Not your average conversation with your typical marketing person is it!

If you want to have more success in your business and sales, you need to become an expert at creating trust and connection online through your personal brand, and creating quality content. Book a free half hour strategy session with Melissa today to find out how you can be the Rockstar in your industry. If you want it, it is possible.

And if you would like to check out Melissa, follow these links:

https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://melissajscott.com/

Melissa

In this episode we speak with Justine Watt, Clinical Hypnotherapist and Energy Healer from New Leaf Healing, about energy healing and what it actually is, and more importantly how you can adopt some of these practices in order to get more connected with yourself, the people in your life and with your audience. 

What does an energy healer do?

“An energy healer works with another person’s energy with the intention of helping their energy to be bright, clear and clean.”
Justine Watt

In your business interactions, you may have noticed how some people might have a big, charismatic energy and this most likely means they have a strong belief in themselves which will really allow their energy to expand out into the world. Whereas other people might be more fearful in their interactions, particularly in putting themselves out in front of their business, appearing in videos and social media, even to the point of being hesitant to start their own business. This can sometimes mean they have more of a self-limiting belief system at play, for example, they might think “I’m not good enough” or “who am I to do this” etc, and this can have their energy feeling more contracted.

What is disconnection and how does this affect us?

A lot of people don’t realise how disconnected they really are. Disconnected is when you might be operating in a negative energy and you are constantly replaying those hurtful stories you might have such as “I’m not good enough, who am I to even do this?” etc and are not connected to what is going on at an emotional level.

What can be done?

A good way to start shining a spotlight on this disconnection is to
• Tune in, ask yourself how am I feeling today? What am I needing today?
• Calm down your racing mind and negative thoughts
• Meditation, 2 minutes of being quiet and still and focusing on the breath is a great place to start.
• Realising that this is a lifelong practice. There is no magic wand or cure!
• Finding yourself a good team of people who will support you
• Surrounding yourself with people who help you feel good and don’t feel like they are constantly “draining you”
• Learn how to “invite” into your life what you actually want.
• Consciously making an intention that I am calling in people, things, events etc into my life that I truly want, and then setting a concrete action behind it.

How does energy affect us in the workplace?

Sometimes in business we need to deal with people whose energy is not the greatest, but we need to make it work. The first and most powerful thing you can do is to fully accept and understand:

“We can’t change anything external to us, only thing we have control of our response to the situation.”
Justine Watt

Once we understand this, that in itself can be quite empowering. Make a conscious decision in the morning, that regardless of what is happening around you, you are going to have a good day and be productive. Yes, it is a short term, immediate solution but it can have the effect of helping you navigate your day with the bonus effect that you might end up with the other person beginning to respond in a more positive manner to your energy.

If this message is resonating with you then please listen to the podcast or watch the video and if you would like to get in touch with Justine, you can find her at https://newleafhealing.com.au/
She has an online course opening soon called “Eliminating Overthinking” and is all about interrupting that thinking pattern with lots of practical and simple tools that you can do at home.   
https://newleafhealing.com.au/eliminate-overthinking-4-steps-to-a-quiet-mind/

And if you would like to check out Melissa, follow these links:

https://melissajscott.com/
https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://divinecreative.com.au

“Once you are more connected to yourself, everything in your life will run smoother, from the way you run your business, to your everyday life and family.”

Melissa J Scott

 If you want to be successful in today’s business world, achieve your goals and have an impact on the world around you, it is vitally important that you learn to connect with yourself first and know who you are.

 When I first have a client come into the office we sit down and I ask them the big questions, who are you, why do you do what you do, what do you want to achieve, what makes you unique and so on, and it is absolutely amazing how many people stumble on answering these basic questions that are really at the core of running a successful business and creating a wonderful life. After all, how do you expect to connect with anyone else if you haven’t connected to yourself first?

 In todays podcast I share with you 9 incredibly powerful tips to help you learn how to connect with yourself, truly know who you are and uncover the answers to the big core questions.

1. TUNE IN WITH YOURSELF: Learn to slow down, pause and reflect on your feelings. Ask yourself, what am I feeling? Let yourself feel the emotion, reflect and let go.
2. SIT IN SILIENCE: Turn off the TV, radio, podcast, limit your distractions. Consider trying meditating, listen into podcast for in-depth suggestion
3. FOCUS ON BREATHING: When tense, try stretching out and breathing deeply from your diaphragm.
4. JOURNALING: Try journaling first thing in the morning, just scribble down whatever pops into your mind, don't ''think'' it.
5. MORNING RITUAL: Create a beautiful morning ritual for yourself where you start the day gently and calmly, no social media allowed!
6. IT'S YOUR CHOICE: Be more conscious about your thoughts and how you respond. When we rush around busy all the time we are often reactive
7. MOVE YOUR BODY IN NATURE: Move your body, get fit, be active. Preferable double the benefits and get outside in nature.
8. BE CREATVE: Do something purely creative and let your mind flow
9. SPEAK KINDLY TO YOURSELF: Acknowledge how far you have come and congratulate yourself on the beautiful life you have create. Love all of your self and forgive and accept yourself because it all makes up the frame-work of who you are.

You might find as you try some of these tips that things will come up that you are not so keen on and that is perfectly normal. That’s when you get to make a choice, don’t just judge yourself harshly and be critical. Make a conscious decision to change, and get help in a certain area if you need to. Choose a new future. 

“If your personal reality is creating your personality, you are a victim. But if your personality is creating your personal reality, then you are a creator.”
Dr Joe Dispenza

 By doing these activities and connecting with yourself, you are laying the foundations for leading a much happier, better connected and more intuitive life.

If you want to have more success in your business and sales, you need to become an expert at creating trust and connection online through your personal brand, and creating quality content. Book a free half hour strategy session with Melissa today to find out how you can be the Rockstar in your industry. If you want it, it is possible.

 And if you would like to check out Melissa, follow these links:

 https://melissajscott.com/
https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://divinecreative.com.au

 Melissa J Scott

Recently we spoke with Karyn Battersby who is a Human Behaviour Specialist, regarding one of our favourite topics – self love. So many people think they know what it means, but as is so often the case, it’s much bigger than you realise!

Karyn and I met quite a few years ago at a business event and she has also been a personal councillor for me during certain periods of my life and I honestly believe there is no one greater to talk about the topic of self love then Karyn.

So what is self love?... And how do we know if we are achieving it in our life?! "Self love isn’t just running a bath, going to a spa, a glass of wine. In actual fact, self love encompasses everything from our boundaries to who we allow into our lives, and knowing who we are, the good and bad and accepting, embracing and loving all of it”. Karyn Battersby.

Self love means learning to look into the parts of ourselves, including the parts we are not so fond of, and is incredibly important self-awareness work. As humans, we tend to want to hide the parts of ourselves that we might feel a bit of shame about, and particularly any guilt or embarrassment. We tend to keep it hidden very much from the rest of the world and it is really only our intimate partners or closest that might see it. And even then, we may hide it from those closest to us for fear of being unlovable.

“Our instinct, our natural response, is to try and hide our darker side, because we think it is unlovable. But what we are doing is orphaning that side of ourselves. Self love is the act of bringing that side in and loving it as well. You need to embrace it, acknowledge it, then you can work on it. That is self love”. Karyn Battersby.

You might be familiar with catch phrases like “do the work”, “love yourself”, but what do they actually mean? And how do you even “do the work”? Doing the work can often mean looking at the actual triggers, including what can you learn from them and what patterns are occurring time and time again, even when in different situations and yet you have responded in a similar way.

So how can a lack of self love affect business owners? Many people fear that they can’t effectively lead their team and come from a place of vulnerability. And yet this is the essence of being an authentic leader.

Do you find yourself avoiding particular sets of circumstances? Are you having a negative response around sales and putting yourself out there as an expert in your field?? If you are not comfortable doing the small things, you are not going to be comfortable doing the big things when you grow.

Where is a good place to start if you think you need some help? We find journaling is a great place to start. When you have had one of those moments and it has really triggered a reaction, ask yourself the questions, what is going on for me there? What is it that made me feel that way? What was the trigger for me, when else have I felt this way? This is a valuable way to come across a pattern of behaviours to work on.

Having a good community around you of like-minded people and or a good coach or councillor can be very helpful. It is also important to not always “be in your head”. Do some yoga, walking, exercise, something creative that takes you into a different side of your brain.

If this message is resonating with you then please listen to the podcast or watch the video and if you would like to get in touch with Karyn you can find her on Facebook.com/karyn.battersby. She has an online coaching group and program and offers 1 on 1 coaching.

And if you would like to check out Melissa, follow these links:

https://melissajscott.com/
https://www.connectionmarketing.online
https://divinecreative.com.au

Me