Conversations with a Dom

Chief and Moineau are back, answering your burning BDSM questions submitted via KinkyEvents.co.uk. Whether you're a solo submissive wondering how to start your journey, or struggling to find a dominant who’s more than just talk, they’ve got you covered.

They provide candid advice on tackling BDSM as a solo submissive, ways to find a true dominant partner, overcoming challenges in kinky relationships, and dealing with anxieties and insecurities within the dynamic.

Additionally, they discuss practical tips for integrating D/s dynamics discreetly in everyday life, handling dominance outside the bedroom, dealing with emotional drops after events, and the importance of clear communication in kinky relationships. Tune in for an engaging and insightful conversation filled with personal anecdotes, practical advice, and a touch of humor.

00:00 Introduction
01:02 Navigating Play Parties as a Solo Submissive Female
05:19 Listener's Personal Journey into BDSM
06:29 Challenges and Insecurities in Sexual Dynamics
14:49 Exploring Kink and Self-Acceptance
23:50 Advice for New Dominants
33:58 Overcoming Fear and Mistakes in Knot Tying
35:00 Navigating a Daddy-Sub Dynamic
39:28 Finding a Genuine Dominant Partner
46:04 Dealing with Event Drop and Polyamory Challenges
52:17 Expressing Desires for Mental Domination
54:30 Exploring Dirty Talk and Overcoming Nerves
58:40 Balancing Kink and Long-Term Relationships
01:11:05 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau are back, answering more of your burning BDSM and relationship questions!

Ever wondered what to do if impact play isn’t your thing? Or whether all Doms need a title? They break down alternatives for brats and subs who aren’t into spanking, and debate the role of labels in the Dom/sub dynamic. Plus, what’s the best way to meet a unicorn?

Moineau shares an update on mastering the cowgirl position and Chief reveals his latest quest for the ultimate male sex toy - this time, an octopus-like vibrating stroker.

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau dive headfirst into the first batch of juicy, reader-submitted questions about BDSM, dominance, submission, and everything in between. From spicing up oral with dominant energy to navigating long-distance D/s struggles, they tackle it all with humor, honesty, and practical advice.

Ever felt your dominance wane? Wondering how to introduce kinks to a vanilla partner without freaking them out? Curious about the psychology behind impact play? They’ve got you covered. Expect candid discussions on pegging, face slapping, balancing desires in a D/s dynamic, and how to keep that dominant spark alive.

With plenty of laughs, real talk, and insightful tips, this episode is packed with actionable advice to help you deepen your BDSM relationships and own your kink with confidence.

00:00 Introduction and episode overview
 01:35 Chocolate and aphrodisiacs
 02:16 Funny anecdotes and misunderstandings
 03:19 First listener question: dominance during oral
 05:53 Pros and cons of DS relationships
 08:59 Losing dominance drive
 12:32 Bringing up kinks with a new partner
 14:10 Dealing with extreme kinks
 23:45 Feeling like a fraud as a dom
 30:07 Developing dominant skills
 37:37 Navigating dominance and submission dynamics
 38:09 Compromise and communication in kink
 39:07 The rubber band analogy
 39:49 Recommended reading: with sprinkles on top
 40:50 Balancing desires in DS relationships
 42:01 Exploring impact play and resistance
 44:01 Discussing face slapping and personal limits
 54:54 Spontaneity in BDSM
 59:02 Finding time for DS scenes
 01:09:07 Preparing for pegging

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau discuss Stephanie Goerlich's book 'With Sprinkles on Top' and the importance of communication in bridging the gap between kinky and vanilla partners.

We compare mental fantasies with real-world practicality (including threesome and more-some discussions!), as well as negotiating and compromising in relationships.

We then try out two exercises from the book - a mad-lib style desire sharing exercise, and one to gauge our comfort levels with erotic language.

If you're a kinky person looking for ways to improve your relationship and get more comfortable sharing your desires with a partner then this podcast is for you!

Resources:
Stephanie Goerlich's website: https://www.stefanigoerlich.com
The PDF of exercises: https://www.stefanigoerlich.com/negotiationwkshts.html
Our website: https://kinkyevents.co.uk

Timestamps:
00:00 Introduction
00:58 Kinky Statistics
02:28 Introducing the Book: With Sprinkles on Top
04:39 Exploring Kink and Communication
06:50 Personal Kink Experiences and Fantasies
10:01 Discussing Threesomes and Boundaries
24:06 Fantasy Worksheet Exercise
33:42 Exploring Desires and Fantasies
34:19 Power Dynamics and Control
35:24 Communication and Connection
37:05 Erotic Vocabulary Exercise

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief presents 30 varied exercises designed to improve communication skills within BDSM and D/s relationships. These activities aim to deepen the connection, enhance understanding, and ultimately lead to a better sex life. Ranging from joint journaling and desire mapping to more elaborate setups like role-reversal games and fantasy sharing, each exercise builds upon the previous ones.

Each exercise is discussed briefly, including instructions and several resources for each activity, emphasising the flexibility of the exercises to suit individual dynamics.

The episode encourages couples to actively practice these exercises to foster trust, empathy, and a more satisfying relationship.

00:00 Introduction to 30 Communication Exercises
00:30 Why Communication Matters in D/s Relationships
01:28 How to Approach These Exercises
02:03 Week 1: Foundation of Communication
02:08 Day 1: Joint Journaling
02:28 Day 2: Desire Mapping
03:22 Day 3: Create Safe Words
03:44 Day 4: Daily Check-Ins
04:02 Day 5: Feedback Session
04:40 Day 6: Communication Games
06:11 Day 7: Weekly Reflection
06:30 Week 2: Exploration and Education
06:50 Day 8: Research Assignment
07:19 Day 9: Sensation Play Experiment
08:06 Day 10: Role Reversal
08:29 Day 11: Boundary Testing
09:35 Day 12: Kink Workshop or Webinar
10:38 Day 13: Fantasy Sharing
11:12 Day 14: Weekly Reflection
11:40 Week 3: Deepening Trust and Connection
11:47 Day 15: Trust Exercises
12:08 Day 16: Gratitude Lists
12:24 Day 17: Surprise Day
12:43 Day 18: Vulnerability Night
13:10 Day 19: D/s Day Out
13:46 Day 20: Aftercare Focus
14:06 Day 21: Weekly Reflection
14:41 Week 4: Integration and Future Planning
14:48 Day 22: Dynamic Goal Setting
15:18 Day 23: Contract Review/Creation
15:58 Day 24: Creative Play
16:31 Day 25: Self Care Day
16:47 Day 26: Community Engagement
17:15 Day 27: Legacy Letter
17:45 Day 28: Celebration Session
18:27 Day 29-30: Reflection and Relaxation
18:53 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau share a candid conversation about their recent intimate and sensual experience. They discuss reading explicit sexting exchanges, the buildup of sexual tension, and the psychological and physical aspects of their BDSM and DS relationship. The conversation covers themes of edging, teasing, and the importance of understanding and meeting each other's needs. They also highlight the roles of communication and consent in their dynamic, delving into a detailed recount of a night filled with massages, dirty talk, and slow, anticipatory teasing, culminating in deep emotional and physical connection.

• 00:00 Introduction and Naughty Sexting
• 01:51 Dreams and Desires
• 04:56 Consent and Boundaries
• 07:25 Anticipation and Preparation
• 16:36 Unexpected Massage
• 25:07 Teasing and Restraints
• 30:39 Building Anticipation: The Art of Teasing
• 31:19 Exploring Sensitivity: Techniques and Reactions
• 33:30 Roleplay Dynamics: Daddy's Not Supposed to Touch
• 34:09 Graphic Details: Fingering and Feedback
• 35:58 The Fantasy and the Reality: Toys and Tools
• 36:54 Psychological Elements in BDSM
• 39:17 The Importance of Relaxation and Comfort
• 43:23 Edging and Penetration: The Balancing Act
• 46:21 The Climax: Achieving Multiple Orgasms
• 51:55 Aftercare and Reflection
• 52:27 Final Thoughts and Resources

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau revisit their Sex Menus from March 2020, and chat through what's changed and what hasn't. This episode highlights why a Sex Menu is such a fantastic tool for open communication in relationships. They showcase how such candid discussions can significantly enhance intimacy and satisfaction, foster a deeper understanding between partners, encourage exploration, and ultimately improve your sex life. Whether you're deeply embedded in the BDSM community or just curious about enhancing communication and desire in your relationship, this episode provides a real-world example of how embracing change and being open about your sexual wants can lead to more fulfilling experiences.

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau spill the beans on finding BDSM events and making kinky friends. It’s a no-holds-barred chat filled with personal anecdotes, laughter, and a heap of useful tips for anyone curious about or already exploring the world of BDSM.

They tackle everything from the ins and outs of FetLife to the unique charm of munches, all while keeping it real about the ups and downs of connecting in the community.

Whether you're navigating the scene in a buzzing city or a quiet town, this episode packs everything you need to broaden your kinky social circle and step up your BDSM game, served with a side of cheeky humour and warmth.

• [00:01:16] Finding BDSM Events: The hosts discuss starting with FetLife and the significance of attending munches to meet the community.
• [00:03:03] Challenges for Women on FetLife: Moineau shares her experiences with the platform, highlighting the importance of safety and privacy.
• [00:04:11] Utilizing FetLife for Events, Not Dating: Chief elaborates on how FetLife serves best for finding events rather than forming personal connections.
• [00:09:30] Word of Mouth: Emphasizing the value of personal recommendations in discovering events and making kinky friends.
• [00:10:06] Collaborative Events: The hosts discuss how event newsletters from groups like Fox Den can introduce attendees to broader networks.
• [00:14:00] Finding BDSM-friendly Events on Vanilla Platforms: Suggestions for locating events with a BDSM twist on sites like Eventbrite.
• [00:16:48] Gender Dynamics at Munches: An observation on the male-dominated attendance and strategies for women to find more inclusive spaces.
• [00:18:00] Alternative Social Gatherings: Exploring book clubs and erotic poetry readings as unconventional avenues to meet kinky individuals.
• [00:22:31] Sex-positive Charities as Networking Hubs: Highlighting the role of charities in connecting people with the BDSM community.
• [00:24:11] Different Types of BDSM Events: Distinguishing between social, educational, and play-focused events to align with personal interests.
• [00:26:53] The Challenge of Finding the Right Events: Acknowledging the effort required to find fitting BDSM events and the rewarding nature of successful conne

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

Chief and Moineau sit down with Liz who recently introduced D/s into an existing long-term relationship. With humour and candidness, Liz shares their initial steps, challenges, and the profound impact of BDSM on their connection and communication. 

From confronting fears and preconceptions to utilising practical tools like the sex menu for negotiating desires, this episode is a testament to the transformative power of open dialogue and trust in rekindling intimacy.

Join us for an enlightening discussion that demystifies the transition into a D/s lifestyle, offering insights and encouragement for those curious about the path of sexual exploration and deepened partnership.

Key Points & Timestamps:

• [00:00:26] Liz discusses beginning their D/s journey and overcoming challenges related to depression and medication.
• [00:03:21] Chief and Liz reflect on how D/s dynamics can revive intimacy in long-term relationships.
• [00:04:30] Introduction of the sex menu as a transformative tool for couples.
• [00:06:02] Liz shares the initial conversation with Tom about exploring a D/s relationship, highlighting the importance of communication.
• [00:07:59] Transitioning from minimal communication about sex to frequent, open dialogues.
• [00:12:34] Liz describes the liberating aspect of submission in her otherwise dominant life roles.
• [00:14:17] Discussion on the gradual introduction and evolution of D/s dynamics in a relationship.
• [00:15:22] Homework assignments as a method for exploring and expressing desires within the D/s context.
• [00:18:40] Overcoming a hiccup in a scene and the importance of safe words and aftercare.
• [00:23:20] Liz shares the positive changes and deeper connection in her relationship since embracing D/s, encouraging open discussions about sex and desires.
• [00:29:14] Surprises and adjustments made after filling out the sex menu.
• [00:32:39] Liz emphasizes the importance of overcoming fear and engaging in open communication with partners.
• [00:38:14] Looking forward to the future of their D/s dynamic and exploring new activities together.
• [00:41:48] Final thoughts: The significance of communication and not being afraid t

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...

In this episode Chief clears up misconceptions about the BDSM and Dom/sub lifestyle. With a wealth of experience and knowledge, Chief discusses and debunks eight prevalent myths. Whether you're new to the scene or looking for clarity on certain aspects of BDSM, this episode is packed with insights, advice, and a call for open-mindedness and consent above all.

Join us as we explore the true nature of power play and empower you with the knowledge to engage in healthy, consensual BDSM dynamics.

Support the show

--------------
Enjoyed the episode? Take your sex life to new heights and turn your fantasies into reality with my book and courses. Your dream dynamic is just a step away!

The BDSM Bundle: Get my two best selling digital courses, plus my ebook as a bonus (https://courses.kinkyevents.co.uk/bundles/bdsm-bundle).

Sensational Scenes. Learn how to heighten arousal, induce subspace, and have mind-blowing sexual experiences. Pick up a copy of my ebook today (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/book).

The Art of Submission. Become a confident submissive and make your kinky fantasies a reality with our online video course for subs (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/aos).

Sinful Shibari: Learn rope bondage for couples with our online video course (https://kinkyevents.co.uk/sinful-shibari).

Freebies: Free ebook, sex menu template, and email content ...