Crafts Conversation

The Data is In!: The podcasters Did Research for an episode. We got the Mia Khalifa/iLOVEFRiDAY beef (10:54; pt.ii 54:59), the Amberlynn Reid & Nikocado Avocado feud (21:50), and SpaceGhostPurrp vs Lil Shark (1:19:00). Experience the Kübler-Ross model all in one shebang in 1 preposterously long episode. Best heard on a pair of Sony MDR-G61 behind the neck headphones while butting in line at talbots.

[Original airdate: 2/20/18] To celebrate the "Year of the Rat," the Crafts Conversation team zeros in its focus on, "The Secret Life of Rats"….or something. I dunno this aired like 4 years ago. Rat facts abound for everyone! Josh Levitt (Kate's Brother) calls in to answer some questions about how the pain scale for humans applies to rodents. So put some whiskers on a smiley face and dive head first into Rats. Also if you have a problem with Rats nibbling on your genitalia...the company "Hims" (Thinx for Men) can help with their line of vermin repellent underwear ($240).

Edward and Brian went to school for colors and are mocked by Kate. Kate defends fucking a jellyfish for 3 hours but thankfully Elijah cut that out. Brian discovers he’s color-blind. Edward stuffed himself with Blue brand dog food (to see if it tasted like the color) but Elijah cut that out too. Elijah went cutting board crazy. Edward discovers he’s color-blind as well. Call to action against the color, “Hunter Green”. Kate discovers she’s color-blind but thinks it’s fun. A heated moral debate about the application of color psychology in contemporary advertising takes place at length, and is then cut out by Elijah.

Just in time for the holidays, it’s the Craft of Cookies & Candy! All about the yummy-wummy ooey gooey sweets you love to choke down and dissolve with your gullet. TIRED of eating fruits and vegetables?? Try some Runts shaped like onions. FED UP with eating ass-fed beef??? Then eat a yummy gummy chewy hamburger like the cutie patootie slob U are. *Price one shiny nickle* While you’re at it why not pack your maw full of crumbly crispity crunchity munchy yum-yum subway cookies and expired gingerbread houses you sun-kissed cur. Edward’s mom makes a guest appearance and threatens him with late stage-child abuse. Oh, and also Elijah muses on suicide.

Beatlemania is described thusly within the DSM-5 (A Sacred Text) as "A peculiar uneasiness, with a slouching gait and wildness of eye, are the truest signs of hydrophobic intent. When these are observed, the worms should be confined by his master, or avoided when met. Your Meyer's branded candle should remain hidden. Just the tip visible." Brian continues his gatekeeping. Kate refuses to look people in the eye. Edward is appreciated. #OldYellerGate

In this episode, (a true labyrinth) Elijah comes in to the fore and the fray and Does Editing. Meanwhile the goober patrol talks manic pixie chicks bent on world whimsification AKA have the dsm-V app on the 1st page of their phone. I dunno i didn’t really listen but damn that Scott Pilgrim chick is hot (Elijah's Note: Who is that?) and i’m inside an ad for The Liberty Mutual at the Red Hook in Fairway.

Live, Laugh, Love...and they’re back! 5 Years later...by popular demand, Audible+ in partnership with W.B. Mason has rebooted the classic series Crafts Conversation for your mind, body, and craw. Listen closely as our 3 heroes gestate carefully on just what is a cranberry bog, and to a lesser extent get hyphy flippant about the Incan flag. Won’t you joïn us? God Bless the Eelman of the Bog. Write your local jr. senator about Elijah.

Mixtape Meditation.

Inspirational Tools for Higher Living by Letting an Idiot Yell at You.

Scored by Wiggles & DjTools.com

In this amazing follow up to their award-winning episode on NAMBLA, (We only lost 3 Followers!) the Crafts Conversation team review the data from their quantitative and qualitative analysis of young boys, and what they find is simple: there’s no good reason to become a pedophile. Kids are still gross.

We made an episode for kids by editing out the cursing but the content may not be for kids. (Unfortunate) We discuss the 1994 documentary "Chickenhawks" and the activist groups NAMbLA vs. Straight Kids USA. Two ships pass in the night. One is a hyper focused Adult Male wearing rose-tinted Disney RealD))) glasses and sweating slightly. The other is Theodore Tugboat.

Kids are gross.

*We have an Instagram now. https://www.instagram.com/craftsconversation/