Haunted woods in the middle of Virginia? Fuck yeah! Crook and Murder are on it. This place has it all. Ghost pirates, ghost treasure, ghost trees, ghost house, even a ghost knight! Well, a fully equipped ghost knight in plate armor, complete with a ghost horse... in a fairly small, wooded area in the middle of Virginia. But we're on it!

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It's the end of our Roanoke series, and oh boy, are we ready to be done with it. I'm sure you are too. Crook, Murder, and Special Guest Alex (now and forever to be known as SGA) dig into the theories that are out there, from bonkers to the real shit. Murder and Crook stray off into some pretty dark shit and the boys discuss the pros and cons of cocaine.  Stick around for a very special table read of a script Crook has been working on for "National Treasure III: The Roanoke-ing". This is a Murder guarantee, it's better than the first two films.  

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It's time to dig deeper into the "mysterious" lost colony of Roanoke. Crook, Murder, and Alex discuss the various investigations into what happened to these 50-ish wannabe nobles who tried to strike it big in the new world. Was it all a propaganda grab by a psychotic, christian "historian" to blame it on the Indigenous Peoples of America? Was it a money grab for the all important sassafras tree by some other white dude? Or maybe, just maybe, there never were any colonists?  

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Get ready, it's Roanoke Part 2! We've more white people doing even stupider shit than in part 1. Plus a guy named White doing stupid white people shit. If only these numbskulls had Captain Eli Blood to launch a which hunt to get them to focus on something - ANYTHING - then maybe they wouldn't need their governor to sail back to England so often for supplies. I'm mean seriously, how many winters does it take to like maybe ask the local for help. They've been living on the damn continent for about 10,000 years, they probably know all the good restaurants. 

Murder also spills the beans on what happens in his therapist's office, Crook gives some inside stories about what goes on at fine dining establishments, and Alex falls asleep. 

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Roanoke... The island, not the town in VA with the awesome MTG card shop. The first (second, really) English colony in the Americas. It disappeared without a trace... well except for the word "Croatoan" carved into a fencepost. What does it all mean? Where did all the super white, ill-equipped English dandies and their families go? Well, the boys are here to lay it down in a four part series. Part 1: the worst planned expedition ever and the audacity of old white men get our first batch of colonists into a heap of trouble, without even really realizing it. 

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More geek goodness from the boys. I listened, but all I really heard was something about Velma and my mind just couldn't focus anymore... no clue why.

Your Humble Anarcho-OldAsDustAndNotGettingYounger-Crust-Punk,
Max Murder

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Pyramids... Geonically interesting buildings built by cavillations, the world wide? Or something more mysterious? Certainly a good place to have your mummified body place along with all your living slaves. Or are they better for blood sacrifice of your enamies? Well Crook, not Murder, and Alex solve the mystery! 

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Who wants to get Leyed... lines? The question really should be, "Who wants a mustache ride?". You might be wondering, wtf is a Ley Line? Well we're gonna tell you. The boys go deep on lines that criss cross the world, or possibly just England. Crystals and sage, yoga cults and anti-vaxxers, and expert surveyors, all things that might come to mind when you think ley lines. Crook and Murder get to the bottom of these, possibly bullshit... lines... lines that connect things. Just listen and you'll understand. 

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Count the windows! Is there a ghost of some creepy lady? Could it be the witch with the bangin' body who tried to kill the king and was subsequently BURNED AT THE STAKE!? Whatever it is, it's definitely the Scots. The boys uncover the strange, and mostly drunk, happenings at this mysterious Scottish castle... Or is it a future wedding venue?

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Happy Holidays, damnit! It's late, but if you weren't a dick and tuned in live you did catch this one around Santa Time. Crook, Murder, and our uninvited guest talk about the awesomely metal anti-claus, Krampus. Enjoy hearing about how Yule was celebrated by Vikings and the Germanic tribes and how the Austrians stuck it to the Catholic Church and came up with an even more evil/metal version of Krampus.

A special holiday message from Crook, Murder, and uninvited guest host, Al:  Fuck Christmas, we hope you all hate it as much as we do.

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