Cultivate Contentment

This episode has been sitting with me while I’ve been working on Back to Herself… not because I was trying to come up with something to say, but because I kept noticing this same feeling come up again and again in conversations.

It’s that stage where nothing in your life looks wrong. Everything is working. Your days are full, your family is cared for, the farm is moving, and on paper it all makes sense. But underneath that, something doesn’t feel quite right anymore.

It doesn’t hit when life is busy. In those seasons, you don’t have time to think about it. It shows up in the quiet moments… when you’re doing the school pick-up, folding the washing, sitting in the ute for a minute. Those small, in-between moments where your mind drifts and you catch yourself thinking… is this it?

And then just as quickly, you move on.

This episode sits in that space. The space before anything changes. Before you’ve said it out loud. Before you’ve figured out what to do next.

Because sometimes the hardest part isn’t that something isn’t working… it’s admitting it.

We talk about the tension of loving your life but still wanting more, the guilt that comes with that, and the fear of what it might mean if you actually let yourself be honest about it.

If you’ve ever felt like something is slightly off but you can’t quite explain why, or you’ve had that quiet thought of “I want more… or something” and then pushed it away, this episode will feel familiar.

And if you are sitting in that space right now, this is exactly why I created Back to Herself. Not for when everything is clear, but for this stage… when you can feel it, but you haven’t quite known what to do with it yet.

The waitlist is open now, and early bird opens next week.

In this episode, I talk about:

• The quiet awareness that something doesn’t feel right, even when life looks good on the outside
• Why this feeling shows up in the quiet moments, not the busy ones
• The small, passing thoughts we brush off (is this it? what if I did something different?)
• The difference between comparison and curiosity
• The weight of saying “I want more” and the guilt that comes with it
• How we soften or explain away what we’re really feeling
• Outgrowing the version of yourself that built your current life
• When routines and habits that once supported you start to feel restrictive
• The fear of what change might mean for your identity, your family, and your role
• Why we stay where we are, even when it doesn’t feel quite right anymore
• The “in-between” space before anything changes
• Why admitting it is often the hardest part

Back to Herself Waitlist

Contact Jess

Instagram @thejess.knight

www.jessknight.com

This episode came from a season where everything just felt… full.

Calving, sickness in the house, the boys starting football, in-laws away, building Back to Herself in the background. Nothing unusual on its own, but all sitting together at once. And in that, I started noticing something I think a lot of women experience, but don’t always name.

How responsibility doesn’t just sit in your life… it slowly becomes your life.

From the outside, it often looks like everything is working. You’re showing up, getting things done, holding everything together. People tell you you’re doing well, that you handle so much, that you make it look easy. And maybe part of you believes that, because you are doing it.

But underneath that, there can be a quieter realisation.

That your life has slowly become a list of roles and responsibilities. Mum. Partner. Farmer. Worker. Community member. The one who remembers everything. The one who manages everything.

And somewhere in that… the person underneath gets quieter.

In this episode, I talk through the moment I first really saw this in myself, sitting in a leadership program where I was asked to describe who I was outside of my roles… and realised I couldn’t. I share how becoming the stay-at-home parent led to a natural progression of taking on more and more responsibility over time, how I became the “default person” for everything in our family, and how that role, while necessary and even valuable, slowly became the framework I lived inside.

We also explore the idea of an “identity state” — the roles and stories we create about who we are, and how over time, they can become so fixed that stepping outside of them feels uncomfortable, or even a bit scary.

This isn’t just about motherhood. This can happen in any area of life. On the farm, in a job, in community roles. Anywhere responsibility keeps building without you really noticing… until one day it feels like too much, or like there’s no space left for you.

This episode isn’t about fixing that.

It’s about recognising it.

Because often, this is the point where things start to shift.

• How responsibility can slowly become your whole identity
• Why capable women often become the “default person” for everything
• The natural progression of taking on more (and why you don’t notice it happening)
• The hidden weight of responsibility without recognition
• The concept of an “identity state” and how roles become who we are
• The tension of stepping outside a role you’ve lived in for so long
• Why this stage often feels like competence from the outside
• The small, quiet signs that you might have lost touch with yourself
• The question that often begins the shift: when did I last do something just because I wanted to?

If this episode felt familiar, if you found yourself in parts of it, this is exactly the space that Back to Herself is designed for.

It’s not about walking away from your responsibilities or becoming someone new. It’s about creating space to reconnect with who you are underneath all of it, and starting to shift your life in a way that includes you again.

Spots are limited, and women on the waitlist will receive access to a special discount when doors open.

Back to Herself Waitlist

Contact Jess

Instagram @thejess.knight

www.jessknight.com

In this episode, I’m talking through something that’s been sitting with me lately — what it’s actually like raising three boys as they grow out of little kid years and into their own personalities.

My oldest has just started high school. My middle son is nearly finished primary school. My youngest is nine and still soft in that way only nine-year-olds can be. And I’m realising that the picture I had — even unconsciously — about what “raising boys” would look like doesn’t quite match reality.

Yes, our house is loud. There are cricket bags in the hallway, football boots under the couch, Minecraft battles in the lounge room and someone being tackled in the kitchen at least once a day. The overstimulation is real.

But underneath the noise and the sport and the wrestling, there’s so much more.

There are frogs and mealworms. There are space facts and wormholes. There are big emotions and quiet worries about fitting in. There are questions about body image and confidence that I didn’t expect boys to carry in the same way girls do. There are conversations at the kitchen bench about anxiety and friendship and what to do when something feels hard.

This episode isn’t about parenting advice. It’s about releasing expectations. About letting go of the unspoken “script” for what boys are meant to be like. About recognising that even in a house full of sport and noise, each child is wired differently.

I share what surprised me, what overwhelmed me when I was younger and didn’t understand little boys at all, and what I’m seeing now as my sons become their own people.

If you’re raising boys — especially in a loud, busy, rural household — I hope this feels like recognition.

• Why homes with multiple boys can feel overstimulating
• The stereotype of the “boy mum” house — and what it misses
• Raising three very different personalities under one roof
• Supporting a child who doesn’t fit the typical sport mould
• The emotional side of boys that often goes unnoticed
• Body image, confidence and fitting in during the teen years
• The importance of safe adults outside the family

Releasing expectations and letting boys be who they are

@thejess.knight

Join the Back to Herself Waitlist

Last week I attended a 900-person agriculture conference and found myself recognising so many familiar faces — people I only see because I chose to leave the farm and show up.

It got me thinking about connection. How it doesn’t just happen. We have to choose it.

In this episode, I reflect on the nerves of my first big conference, reconnecting with a woman I met five years ago, and how my view of women’s circles has shifted from “woo woo” to deeply practical and grounding.

Connection doesn’t have to be a big event. It might be music time at the library, asking another mum for coffee, joining a class, or sending a message on Instagram.

But it does require effort.

If you’ve been craving connection in this season of rural life, this episode is your gentle reminder that you’re not alone — and that sometimes the bravest thing we can do is simply show up.

• Walking into a 900-person conference and recognising familiar faces
• The nerves of attending my first big ag event and feeling like I didn’t belong
• Reconnecting with a woman I met five years ago and seeing how much we’ve both changed
• Trying to fit into a corporate agriculture leadership “box”
• Flying to America alone for a retreat and being welcomed into deep connection
• Why women’s circles aren’t as “woo woo” as I once thought
• The history and purpose of women gathering together
• The physical shift I felt from heavy to light in circle
• The fear that stops us from making the effort
• Small, practical ways to create connection in everyday rural life
• Why connection doesn’t just happen — we have to choose it
• An invitation to join the Back to Herself waitlist

@thejess.knight

Join the Back to Herself Waitlist

I recorded this episode because I couldn’t stop thinking about how much of life is made up of the days we barely notice.

Not the big moments. Not the holidays or milestones or the things we plan and count down to. Just the ordinary days. The school runs. The washing. The late nights. The conversations we half-listen to because we’re already thinking about what’s next.

This isn’t a new idea. I’ve heard versions of it for years. I’ve nodded along to it. I’ve repeated it. But I don’t think I ever really lived it. I think I’ve been living like today is the obstacle and the good stuff is coming later. Like life will feel better once things slow down, or settle, or reach whatever imaginary point I’ve been waiting for.

Turning forty has stirred something in me. So has farm life. So has motherhood. So has sitting on the couch at the end of another long day and asking, what is this all for? And realising — almost painfully — that this is what it’s for. These days. These moments. The ordinary ones I keep rushing past.

In this episode, I talk honestly about the grief that can come with realising how much time slips by unnoticed. About how easy it is to live for the big moments and miss the life that’s actually happening. About what I’m noticing now — not because I’ve figured it out, but because I don’t want to keep living like this bit doesn’t count.

This episode is for the farm mum who is building a life for her family and quietly wondering when she gets to enjoy it. It’s not about fixing anything. It’s just about staying.

• Why most of our lives are made up of ordinary days — and what happens when we treat them like they don’t matter
• How living for holidays, milestones, or “later” can pull us out of the life we’re already in
• A moment on the farm that made it painfully clear what we’re actually doing all of this for
• The grief that can come from realising how much time passes while we’re rushing
• What I’m learning about finding joy and meaning in the everyday — not perfectly, just more honestly

There’s no takeaway. No checklist.
Just something to sit with as you move through your own ordinary days.

Connect with Jess:

@thejess.knight

Join the Grounded Journey Waitlist

This episode has been circling for me for a while.

Not in a neat, “this would make a good episode” kind of way — more in that nagging, tap-on-the-shoulder way where something just won’t let you go.

I keep coming back to the phrase “you can’t pour from an empty cup” — and how often it gets used in conversations about motherhood. I know what people are trying to say when they use it. I know it usually comes from a good place. But the more I sit with it, the more it feels out of step with the reality of a lot of mothers’ lives.

Because the truth is, mothers pour from empty cups all the time. Not because they’re doing it wrong. Not because they’re failing to prioritise themselves. But because there are seasons where there simply isn’t space to stop and refill before you keep going.

In this episode, I talk through a conversation I had recently with a woman deep in the trenches — little kids, farm business, trying to build something of her own — and how well-meaning advice about “filling her cup” actually added more guilt to an already heavy load.

I reflect on guilt, productivity culture, and the way motherhood is often framed as a problem to optimise your way out of. And I share what I’m slowly learning (and still needing to be reminded of): that feeling overwhelmed, empty, or stretched thin is often a completely normal response to the season you’re in — not a sign that you’re doing something wrong.

I also talk about what actually helps in full, demanding seasons. Not in a fixing way. Not as advice. Just as honest reflection. Things like lowering expectations, adjusting the load where you can, and letting go of the idea that your cup has to be full all the time.

This episode isn’t about solutions or self-care checklists. It’s about recognition. About naming what’s heavy. And about letting the season you’re in make sense.

Why the “you can’t pour from an empty cup” idea doesn’t always fit motherhood
How guilt sneaks in and takes up space
The link between productivity culture and self-blame
Why some seasons don’t respond to effort — only time
Letting go of impossible expectations
What actually helps in full, demanding seasons
Adjusting the load instead of trying to fix yourself

Connect with Jess:

@thejess.knight

Join the Grounded Journey Waitlist

This episode is a little different.

I’m scrolling back through my camera roll from 2016 and talking out loud about what comes up. There’s no plan and no tidy storyline — just memories, moments, and the things I notice now that I didn’t have words for at the time.

In 2016, life was full and heavy. I had young children, we were early into farm ownership, and most days were about getting through rather than slowing down. Looking back now, I can see how much I was carrying — the pressure to do everything “right”, the weight of expectation, the way I shut down emotionally just to keep functioning.

This episode isn’t about lessons or advice. It’s about sitting with a season as it really was, noticing who I was then, and offering a bit of compassion to that version of myself.

If you’ve ever looked back at a past season and realised you were carrying more than you knew at the time, this episode is for you.

• Scrolling through my 2016 photos in real time
  
• Life in a full demanding season with young children and farm life
  
• The pressure I felt to be the “perfect” woman and mother
  
• Comparison, milestones, and quiet guilt
  
• Winter sickness, exhaustion, and long nights
  
• What connection looked like in survival mode
  
• Finding small outlets that kept me going
  
• Hospital stays, premature birth, and emotional shutdown
  
• Looking back with compassion instead of judgement

Connect with Jess:

@thejess.knight

Join the Grounded Journey Waitlist

As a new year begins, there’s often a rush to set goals, make plans, and decide how this year will be different.

But before we move forward, I wanted to pause.

In this episode of Cultivate Contentment, I’m reflecting on the year just gone — not through the lens of achievement or failure, but through the lens of reality. What did this year actually ask of us? What didn’t happen, and why does that make sense now? What quiet work did we do that no one else saw?

This conversation came from my own need to slow down and acknowledge a year that asked a lot — particularly in motherhood, personal growth, and capacity. Instead of jumping straight into planning, I’m sharing four reflective questions that helped me see the year more clearly and with more compassion.

I talk honestly about:

• A year that was heavier in motherhood than I realised at the time
• The business plans that didn’t unfold — and why that doesn’t mean failure
• The unseen internal work of asking for help, setting boundaries, and changing how I show up
• What I’m ready to loosen my grip on as I move forward
• Why my word last year was progress, and why this year it’s intentional

This episode isn’t about fixing or reinventing yourself. It’s about giving the year you’ve just lived the respect it deserves — before asking more of yourself in the year ahead.

I’ve also created a free reflection guide to go with this episode, so you can sit with these questions in your own time. You’re welcome to write along as you listen, come back to it later, or simply let the conversation settle.

If all you do today is listen and recognise yourself in parts of this story, that’s enough too.

Download the free reflection guide here.

Connect with Jess:

@thejess.knight

Join the Grounded Journey Waitlist

There are seasons where responsibility feels heavy.
Unwanted, even.
Like one more thing added to an already full plate.

But sometimes, responsibility isn’t just something to get through — it’s the very thing that grows us.

In this episode, I’m reflecting on how often growth doesn’t happen in the quiet, prepared, well-rested moments we imagine it will. Instead, it shows up right in the middle of chaos — when someone hands us a job we didn’t exactly volunteer for, and we have no choice but to figure it out.

I share two very real stories from farm life that taught me this in a big way.

The first takes us into the calf shed — back to the very first job I ever properly took on on the farm: feeding calves. What I thought would be the “easy” job quickly became a steep learning curve, especially when we were hit with crypto during calving season, in the middle of COVID, with no staff. Tubing sick calves every three hours was terrifying, overwhelming, and something I didn’t feel ready for — but it was also the moment I realised I was far more capable than I thought.

The second story is about learning to drive the tractor. Something I didn’t grow up doing, didn’t feel confident with, and honestly avoided for a long time because the timing never felt right. It wasn’t until I had space — real space, without pressure or someone watching over my shoulder — that I could learn in my own way and at my own pace. And once again, responsibility quietly turned into confidence.

As I talk through these stories, I also reflect on how closely this mirrors motherhood.

We give our kids small responsibilities every day — feeding the dog, shutting gates, carrying eggs, helping out — and we watch how those moments build their confidence. Yet when it’s us standing on the edge of something new, we’re so much harder on ourselves. We forget that we deserve the same opportunity to learn, to wobble, and to grow.

This episode is a reminder that confidence doesn’t come before responsibility — it comes because of it. That growth rarely feels empowering in the moment. And that many of the things you now do without thinking once felt completely overwhelming.

If you’re in a season where responsibility feels uncomfortable, heavy, or just plain scary, I hope this episode helps you see it a little differently — not as something that’s breaking you, but as something that might be quietly shaping you.

• Why growth so often happens in chaos, not calm
• Feeding calves and learning hard things in high-pressure moments
• The fear and responsibility that comes with tubing sick calves
• Learning to drive the tractor later than I thought I “should”
• Why confidence usually comes after responsibility, not before
• The strong parallels between farm life and motherhood
• How responsibility builds confidence in our kids — and in us
• Why communication matters when we want to learn and grow
• Recognising just how capable you already are

Connect with Jess:

@thejess.knight

Join the Grounded Journey Waitlist

When I first connected with Krysta on Instagram a couple of years ago, I had no idea we’d eventually sit down and record a conversation like this — two women on opposite sides of the world, somehow living through the same questions, tensions, and gut feelings. This episode is all about stepping out of the boxes we’ve put ourselves in, slowing down long enough to hear our own thoughts, and letting change unfold in a way that actually supports us… not burns us out.

Krysta shares how she left the corporate world after just three months, trusting a gut instinct that her purpose would never fit inside a nine-to-five. From there, she built multiple businesses over ten years — social media management, podcast management, and now a new chapter in coaching blended with wellness practices. What I loved most is how she talks about intuition, yoga, and slowing down not as “woo woo,” but as tools that gave her space to breathe, think, and live below that 99% stress line she used to sit at.

We also talk about what it’s like to shift identities in an industry like agriculture, where boxes and expectations can feel tight. Krysta opens up about choosing to become a yoga teacher — something she feared people in her ag community wouldn’t understand — and how that decision has invited deeper connection, curiosity, and honesty in her life and business.

This conversation keeps circling back to one thing: women aren’t meant to carry all of this alone. Whether it’s listening to the quiet, protecting your capacity, saying no, tending to your own “garden of ideas,” or simply finding five minutes to breathe, there is space for all of us to slow down and build lives that actually feel like ours.

• How Krysta knew early on that corporate life wasn’t where her purpose lived.
• The imposter syndrome that still shows up — even ten years into entrepreneurship.
• Listening to your gut and why quiet moments matter more than we admit.
• Becoming a yoga teacher while working in agriculture…and why it felt scary.
• Breaking out of the “boxes” rural women are often placed in.
• Slowing down after years of running at 99% capacity.
• Burnout, boundaries, and the power of saying no.
• Finding what genuinely works for you instead of copying others’ systems.
• Daily rituals, journaling, movement, and supporting your own nervous system.
• Why connection — especially online — matters so deeply for rural women.
• What cultivating contentment looks like in Krysta’s life right now.

If Krysta’s week-long self-care + business series sounds like what your end-of-year soul is craving, the link is waiting for you in the notes.

Resources & Links:

Grounded Farm Wife Journal

Connect with Krysta:

@ruralpodcastnetwork

@krystapaffrath

www.krystapaffrath.com

Connect with Jessica:

@groundedfarmwife

www.groundedfarmwife.com.au