Straight to jail. No trial. No appeals. Just vibes and a tiny jury made of sticky hands and big feelings.
This week, Zee and Amy are back with a Parenting Chat, and we brought backup: our friend Sam (childcare director, mom of two, and certified survivor of toddler logic). Inspired by the “Am I the Asshole: Toddler Edition” creator, we’re confessing the crimes we’ve committed so far this year—as judged by our children, who are apparently running a full legal system out of spite and snack preferences.
In this episode, we talk:
🍫 The unforgivable act of making homemade brownies (aka: crimes against processed food)
🥣 Snack hyperfixations, wrong brands, wrong bowls, wrong utensils, wrong… existence
🧊 Ice storm parenting choices that ruin everything (Sanchez Sunday edition)
🦷 The Tooth Fairy’s “business hours” and why she does not work nights (relatable)
🌡️ The thermostat wars: kids deserve bodily autonomy AND also want to be freezing + sweaty at the same time
❄️ The Wisconsin Crime: not taking your kids sledding because you also have feelings
👕 Making a toddler change clothes even though they are covered in food/snot/pee (how dare you)
🎮 Parenting while overstimulated: hiding devices “temporarily” (for weeks)
👀 Saying “not right now” and being charged with emotional neglect immediately
Basically: if your kids have ever acted like you personally ruined their life by choosing the wrong spoon, welcome home.
💬 Like what you hear? Leave us a review—we love validation almost as much as we love gossip and being petty.
🛍️ Rock your chaotic true crime energy with merch at www.cursewordsandcrayons.com
🛒 Shop our Amazon Storefront for chaos-survival goodies and maybe a ghost-hunting tool or two (we’re not saying we believe, but we’re also not
not saying that).
Instagram: @cursewordsandcrayons
Zee: @mrs.zette