Dancing With Wisdom

Do you find some people really annoying? The things they say or the way they behave can be so bothersome and irritating.

I know I do and I am sure I am not alone in that! We say things like ‘she makes me so mad’ or ‘he frustrates and irritates me so much’. And maybe there are legitimate things that the other person says or does which are understandably frustrating and annoying.

However, the diagram below (from Stephen Covey’s book The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People) challenges those assumptions in some radical ways.

In Biology at school we learnt that for simple organisms like an amoeba or relatively straight forward structures like the knee joint, there is a predictable response to a stimulus. You prod an amoeba and it goes in a certain direction. Or you strike the front of the knee and you get an involuntary knee jerk reaction.

But we as human beings are much more complex than that.

Granted most people do react to circumstances, but just because they do does not mean you and I have to do the same.

The fact is that for human beings between stimulus and response is a space. In that space we have the power to choose how we respond.

If you think about the word ‘responsibility’ you will notice it is from 2 words – response and ability. In other words responsibility is the ability to choose your response. An extreme example illustrates this…..

Victor Frankl was a Jewish psychiatrist caught in the terrible and brutal horrors of a concentration camp in Nazi Germany. Apart from his sister, his entire family perished. For Frankl himself there was torture, physical and psychological abuse on an unimaginable scale. At any moment death could be around the corner or he could be called to remove dead bodies or shovel the ashes of fellow prisoners.

It was in this truly horrific environment Frankl became aware of what he would later call ‘the last of the human freedoms’. It was a freedom his Nazi captors could not take away. His physical environment was completely controlled by others; he had no choice as to how he spent his day and his tormentors could do what they wanted to his body. He began to realise he was self-aware and could look at everything happening to him as a detached observer. There was a part of himself no one could touch. His identity did not have to be affected by all that was going on around him.

In his mind Frankl created a small oasis that was impervious to all the brutality that was going on in his external environment. He could decide within himself how all this was going to affect him.

Between what happened to him, or the stimulus, and his response to it, was his freedom or power to choose his response. Here is how Covey builds on this:

“In the midst of his experiences, Frankl would project himself into different circumstances, such as lecturing to his students after his release from the death camps. He would describe himself in the classroom, in his mind’s eye, and give his students the lessons he was learning during his very torture.

Through a series of such disciplines – mental, emotional and moral, principally using memory and imagination – he exercised his small embryonic freedom until it grew larger and larger, until he had more freedom than his Nazi captors. They had more liberty, more options to choose from in their environment; but he had more freedom, more internal power to exercise his options. He became an inspiration to those around him, even to some of the guards. He helped others find meaning in their suffering and dignity in their prison existence.”

Yes it is an extreme example, but it illustrates how through stimulus (the irritation or external suffering) and response (how we think and behave) there is the freedom to choose.

Within this freedom to choose, and in addition to self-awareness, we can call upon:

Imagination – that is the ability to create in our minds something beyond our present reality.

Conscience – a deep inner awareness of what is right and wrong. those principles that guide what we do and a sense of how much our thoughts and actions are in harmony with them.

Independent will – our ability to act from our self-awareness in a way free of all other influences.

Do join us on this podcast conversation as we explore:

The link to the podcast is below.

You can also watch the video of the conversation here

“What you don’t know can’t hurt you.” Such is a famous English saying. The problem is it assumes much which is frankly wrong.

Think of a fish (hang in with me, this is going somewhere!) If you ask a fish to describe the water it is swimming in, and if it could answer, it would not know what to say because the water is all it knows about its existence. The water just is and naturally cannot be questioned as it is assumed to be always there.

Now, surprise surprise, we are not fish (another profound thought!) But we also make assumptions about life and our environment that we don’t naturally question.

We have assumptions about ourselves and life that we take for granted as they are so much a part of the world around us. They can hold us back from discovering the wisdom we are called to live by.

By understanding and challenging those assumptions we can learn to begin to dance with wisdom in spite of all the complexity or confusion we commonly see around us.

In this podcast conversation with my cohost Elliott Frisby we discuss three common myths when it comes to wisdom:

Such assumptions can seriously hold us back from living life with the purpose and fulfilment we were intended for. We need wisdom to appropriately handle and overcome the irritations and frustrations of life; the intractable problems we face in getting things done and most importantly to face the major devastations we will ultimately face in terms of death and other disasters.

A sobering example of that is King Solomon who lived in the 10th century BC and was described as the richest and wisest man of his time. Yet in spite of this Solomon made some significant misjudgements and mistakes in his own life that lead to a tragic overall evaluation by his Creator.

After you have listened to the podcast can you think of any other assumptions that may hold us back from dancing with wisdom?

Life’s challenges can diminish, define or develop you. Which will it be? The choice is yours through wisdom. Make sure you choose the right one.

The link to our 27 minute conversation is below.

https://youtu.be/VbI8XwCw5m0

What do you think of when you hear the word idols? Eastern religious statues or the famous world-wide TV show popularised by Simon Cowell?

Whatever your answer I want to show you how essential understanding our own personal idols and removing them are to learning to dance with wisdom.

 There are many secular and religious examples of idols. Indeed more than 500 years ago Martin Luther described the human heart as ‘an idol factory’. What did he mean by that? Is such a statement still relevant to us in our modern age? I very much think it is.

Perhaps the simplest explanation of idolatry is that we are continually looking for something to give us ultimate meaning, purpose and significance. We may not be even consciously aware that is what we are doing. Our hearts are continually putting weight and significance on objects and desires that cannot ultimately deliver all we long and hope for. Our worldwide economy can often seem based on our hunger to buy more and more to satisfy deep longings. As someone has humorously said, “We buy what we don’t want with money we don’t have to impress people we don’t even like!”

The atheist American author and professor of English David Foster Wallace surprisingly calls this insatiable desire for more as worship. When we worship someone or something we give it our committed attention and focus. Its where our minds go to when we have nothing in particular to think about. So worship is primarily an attitude of the heart seeking rest and consolation.

Do join my cohost Elliott Frisby and I as we unpack this and discuss:

In the words of Don Carson, “We must eschew the abominable idolatry of thinking that the universe must dance to our tune.” Do you agree or disagree? Why? Do let me know.

Life’s challenges can diminish, define or develop you. Which will it be? The choice is yours through wisdom. Make sure you choose the right one.

Listen to the 25 minute conversation below to explore this more.

You can also watch on YouTube here

What questions, thoughts or comments does the question of idols raise for you?

Do you have an ego problem? A few years ago I had an argument with my wife, Sally and I was challenged by how my ego was actually making things worse. But, before we get to that, what do we actually mean by ego?

When we talk of someone having an ego, we’re more than just stating a fact and we’re certainly not offering them a compliment! The truth is we all have an ego. On our quest for wisdom why can ego cause such great problems in our own lives and the lives of others? Is there such a thing as a healthy amount of ego? If so we will need much wisdom to get that balance right!

On this podcast do join my cohost Elliott Frisby and I as we discuss:

Life’s challenges can diminish, define or develop you. Which will it be? The choice is yours through wisdom. Make sure you choose the right one.

Listen to the 25 minute conversation below to explore this more.

How do you navigate through life so as to not just survive, but actually thrive and even dance through the confusion and mess?  That is much easier said than done!

More than we care to admit life is so often full of challenges and complex situations where we can feel at the end of our resources. How do we navigate our way through for the greater good of ourselves and others?

All around us we see disordered lives that arise from a lack of wisdom. That can start as a sense of disappointment or general frustration before leading, if unchecked, on to fear, dread, shame, worry, anxiety, stress, burnout, depression and even suicide. As a psychiatrist I have sadly seen those consequences in many people’s lives.

Our restless hearts are constantly looking for security and comfort, while our questioning minds can feel they are drowning in too much information. The result can be disordered lives with rising rates of mental illness and discontentment.

The secular atheistic worldview that is so much a part of our lives cannot provide the meaningful answers we long for.

On this podcast we discuss how the timeless truths of wisdom provide answers to:

Life’s challenges can diminish, define or develop you. Which will it be? The choice is yours through wisdom. Make sure you choose the right one.

Listen to the 25 minute conversation below to explore this more.

You can also watch on YouTube here.

We live in the age of information. Perhaps it is more accurate to say we are drowning in the information constantly presented to us. In previous generations it took 1000 years for human knowledge to double. Currently human knowledge doubles every 12 hours! Is it any surprise that we struggle to keep up? But our minds and souls need so much more than just information. We need wisdom.

Our restless minds struggle to make sense of life with all the information coming at us from all sorts of directions. We are so much more than our minds. We are body, mind and spirit that are interconnected and inter-related in marvellous and complex ways.

On this podcast conversation do come and join my co-host Elliott Frisby and myself as we discuss:

Understanding wisdom is not a one-off event, but the quest of a lifetime.

A quest is long search for something difficult to find or an attempt to achieve something difficult. A quest is different from an adventure. In a adventure, you choose to go out on an exciting journey. It spices up your life and then you come back home to pick up where you left off.

By contrast a quest is not something you choose. Rather, the quest chooses you. You are called to it because of what is going to be demanded of you. In many ways the person you are at the beginning never really comes back from a quest. Either you die on the quest or, if you do come back, you are so fundamentally changed that you are not the same person as when you set out.

Understanding wisdom is something of a quest. The more you learn the more you want to know. It is also incredibly life-enhancing and enriching.

This second podcast conversation with my co-host Elliott Frisby is about wisdom for the heart. We discuss the circumstances around the sudden death of my friend, Abhishek Banerjee on 17 March 2014 and how that was a defining moment in my own life on my quest for wisdom.

We discuss what the implications can be us as we seek to make sense of life in this often cynical, chaotic and confusing world.

You can access the podcast on iTunes, your favourite podcast platform or watch on YouTube!

For the iTunes link see here

For the 26 minute YouTube video conversation just click the image below:

If you haven’t yet downloaded the introduction to the book then you can do so from the home page. Who could you share that with?

Also have you signed up for my virtual book launch on 17 March at 5.55pm -7.30pm GMT (1.55-3.30pm ET and 11.25pm -1am IST. Sorry it is so late India!)? There is still time to do so at this link here

Do feel free to leave your comments or questions from the podcast.

From Making Sense of Life to Dancing With Wisdom! I’m delighted to announce Season 2 Episode 1! 

On Series 2 Episode 1 of the Dancing With Wisdom Podcast we explore the question of Why Wisdom?

Elliott gives us the dictionary definition of wisdom as “The ability to make sensible decisions and give good advice because of the experience and knowledge that you have.”

There are three questions we are going to seek to unpack in this and future conversations:

We unpack wisdom as timeless truths that can connect you with the ultimate best version of who you are and who you long to be. It is about making sense of life in the fullest sense.

You can access the podcast on iTunes, your favourite podcast platform or watch on YouTube!

For the iTunes link see here

For the 26 minute YouTube video see here

If you haven’t yet downloaded the introduction to the book then you can do so from the home page. Who could you share that with?

Do feel free to leave your comments or questions.

What makes this interview particularly fascinating is that it was recorded in January 2020 before the start of the global pandemic that has turned all of our lives upside down. In that time churches have had to go from being based in buildings to being forced to present their services online as there has been no other option. When we recorded this interview we had little idea how much our world was going to change in such a short span of time. While this has created significant challenges it has also led to unprecedented opportunities to present the unchanging message of the Gospel to the world.

Peter and I discuss how technology is becoming more and more an integral part of our lives. Indeed we are just seeing the beginning of a huge revolution in digital technology, which the pandemic has only accelerated at a faster pace than we had imagined. That uneven distribution around the world is becoming rapidly less uneven. We are entering the age of “The Internet of Things” where there is a greater blurring between the physical and virtual worlds. We are going to see a lot of the things previously done by humans replaced by artificial intelligence. Moore’s Law that says the power of the microchip doubles and its size halves every 18 months is creating at an ever increasing rate unprecedented changes in the ways that we live. COVID has only further accelerated those changes.

Before the COVID pandemic Premier Christian Radio, of which Peter is CEO since 1995 had grown to over 1.2 million listeners and 8 million website visitors. Since the pandemic that has grown even further and faster.

How does this changing world impact the unchanging truths of the Biblical Gospel message? Do join us in this conversation as Peter and I discuss:

You can connect directly with Peter at [email protected]

For a 4 minute video on how Premier has pivoted its influence and outreach during 2020 with the pandemic see this 4 minute video here

You may also find of interest:

Podcast #064: Peter Kerridge and the story behind Premier Christian Radio

Podcast #065: Leadership lessons from Peter Kerridge

Podcast #036: Virtually Human

Podcast #037: Making Sense of Technology

Podcast #038 How technology impacts time and sex

Podcast #048: Finding meaning and direction

As we continue our conversation with Peter Kerridge, chief executive of Premier Christian Communications, we ask him a variety of questions around his life and leadership. Peter is well qualified to answer such questions as he has guided the development over the last 25 years of Premier Christian Radio from its humble beginnings to become the largest Christian Radio station in the world.

In particular we explore:

The link to Premier Christian Radio is here

You may also find of interest Podcast #015: Why your leadership matters.

Our previous interview with Peter is at Podcast #064: Peter Kerridge and the story behind Premier Christian Radio