Quack echoes in the distance. A crown gleams beneath muddy skies. And somewhere far off, a sea of white shirts marches west. It's just another strange day on Datepie.

Organs wail, lyrics drift, and nothing is quite as it seems. A melody shrouded in mist, with meanings lost—or buried—beneath the pale.

Tape winds, secrets unwind. A plastic cassette, a walled city, and a history that refuses to stay rewound. Some formats fade—others get archived in gold.

A hole in a man, a hunger for answers, and a doctor who couldn't look away. Curiosity gets clinical as the line between science and servitude blurs. The gut never lies—unless someone’s taking notes.

A day of sandwiches, scandal, and suspicious serenades. One man’s lunch becomes another man’s downfall, while a legendary bark echoes through British backrooms. Something’s cooking—and it’s not just coronation chicken.

A suitcase full of mould, a passport mix-up, and a very strong smell that cleared a train carriage. Some cheeses have bite — this one had a motive.

Twice-battered cod, a soup can in disguise, and a mysterious man who may or may not have been in Buenos Aires — twice. History repeated itself, and then asked for extra vinegar.

A velvet tracksuit, a car worth more than common sense, and a handshake deal made entirely with winks. The engine purred — but the story stalled.

A suspiciously creamy trophy, a lactose-fuelled rivalry, and a quiz that went horribly off the rails. Birthdays aren’t always a piece of cake — sometimes they’re a pint of trouble.

Too many teeth, one suspicious grin, and a misunderstanding involving a mime. Smiles were shared — not all of them willingly.